by Unknown
“Johnny,” his mother called. “You have some guests here.”
Only the flashlight pen moved.
A book page was turned.
“Johnny? They’re police officers. Did you do anything wrong lately?”
His body crunched up suddenly. The book and pen dropped and his hands seemed to curl into each other.
“I’m not!” he slurred. “I’m not. I’m not!”
“Johnny, it’s OK,” his mother cooed and went to his side. “It’s OK, honey. They just want to talk, that’s all.”
Deluca swayed in his spot. His mother hugged his shoulders.
“It’s OK, she said, “it’s OK.”
“What do they want?!” he cried in the same slurring voice.
He’s special, Avery realized.
“Just a few questions,” his mother said, and she waved them on. “You can come closer. He’s all right. He’s just used to being alone.”
Avery squatted down beside him. Shoes: Ten and a half or eleven, she thought. A match. Deluca swayed back and forth. His hands curled and his mouth was in a sneer.
“Hi there, John,” Avery whispered. “How are you today?”
“No!” he yelled.
“It’s OK, Johnny.”
“John,” Avery went on, “I’d like to ask you about a bookstore where you used to work. Do you remember? It was run by a woman named Henrietta Venemeer?”
“Ha, ha ha,” Deluca laughed.
“Oh yes.” Suzie smiled. “He worked there for about three months. They had a disagreement over something related to astronomy and I’m afraid Johnny got very upset. He threw down one of the bookshelves and became extremely angry. They didn’t feel safe there, so they had to let him go. But you would never hurt anyone, would you, baby?”
Deluca smiled and hugged her.
“Thanks, Mom.”
“What happened at Boston University?” Avery asked.
“That was the same kind of thing.” Suzie frowned. “I was actually very upset with the dean because they knew about his condition right from the start. Johnny had excellent grades in high school and even as an undergraduate. As long as he was on his medicine and being handled properly, he was just fine. I blame the college. He had one incident. That’s all. Just one,” she firmly stated. “And all of a sudden he was expelled. I thought of suing.”
“Can I ask what he did?”
“He liked a girl,” she said as if it were no big deal. “And he never expresses himself properly. He keeps his feelings inside and he waits and waits and then they just burst right out. Well, they burst out in an astronomy class. He told her he loved her. Tried to kiss her. Unfortunately, she had a boyfriend and Johnny attacked him. Again, it wasn’t really his fault. That girl must have led him on somehow, must have made him think something. And that boy had a bunch of friends join in the fight. Terrible, just terrible. None of them were expelled.”
“Do you know where your son was on Tuesday night?” Avery asked.
“Of course,” Suzie said. “The same place he is every night. Right here with me.”
“Can you verify that?”
“Well,” she said. “Let’s see. Tuesday. My sister was over on Tuesday. You can contact her if you like. I’m sure she’ll tell you the same thing I did.”
“One more question,” Ramirez said. “What shoe size does your son wear?”
Suzie indicated a pair of sneakers by the wall.
“Twelve,” she said. “Why?”
Avery’s heart fell. This was not their guy.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“That was crazy,” Ramirez said in the car.
“No one gave you any indication he was special needs?” Avery asked.
“Well, one of them said he was special, but she was like ‘he was a real special kind of asshole.’ You know? What am I supposed to do with that?”
“Dammit,” Avery muttered.
It was getting late, and a lead she thought would solve the case had turned out to be nothing. Once again, as always, she began to question Randall’s integrity. Why would he lie? He doesn’t lie, she told herself. He just never gives you a straight answer.
So close, she berated herself. So close.
Her phone rang. The name on the screen made her heart stop and the color drain from her face: Jack. Her ex-husband. They hadn’t spoken in over a year.
What could he want?
Avery hopped out of the car.
“Give me a second,” she said to Ramirez.
“What is it?”
Avery held up her palm and kept walking with the phone by her ear.
“Hey,” she said in her happiest voice. “How are you?”
The voice on the other end was less enthusiastic.
“Hi, Avery,” he replied in a banal tone, “thanks for taking my call. Listen, do you mind meeting me for coffee or something tonight? I know it’s late and you’re probably on call, but I feel like we should sit down and hash some things out.”
“What’s wrong? Is it Rose? What happened?”
“Rose is fine. Nothing terrible has happened. I just want to talk, and you know I hate talking on the phone. Every time we’re on the phone, we have a fight.”
“That’s not true.”
He ignored her.
“I’m thinking our old spot,” he said, “hang out for a while, get some coffee, talk? It would be like old times. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss you.”
“Yeah,” she said, “of course,” and she instinctively brushed back a lock of hair. “Are you around now? I can be there in fifteen or twenty minutes. No,” she corrected and glanced at Ramirez still sitting in her car. Have to drop him off, she remembered. “Scratch that. I have to make one more stop. How about forty-five minutes?”
“That would be perfect,” he said. “It’s good hearing your voice, Avery. Looking forward to seeing you.”
Avery hung up with a light, happy feeling in her core.
Jack, she thought.
His voice had sounded different, sad and guarded. What do you expect? she argued. You haven’t spoken in ages. You broke his heart countless times. He doesn’t trust you. The picnic that Rose wanted to do the following day now seemed entirely plausible. You’re going to see him tonight. What if things go well? Second date tomorrow? She smiled and was shocked at her own girlish excitement. She felt like a college freshman again, about to meet the man of her dreams. This is ridiculous, she thought. It’s just coffee. One step at a time.
“Who was that?” Ramirez asked.
“Nobody.”
He was about to say something and thought better of it.
Avery drove him back to the prison parking lot. They were nearly silent the entire way.
“You wanna grab some dinner tonight?” he asked.
Avery lowered her head.
“I can’t,” she said. “Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” he replied, disappointed. “Maybe.”
He scrunched his lips and opened his door.
“Dan,” she called.
Hopeful, he looked back.
“Yeah?”
Handsome, she thought, so sweet and handsome and he cares about me.
“Nothing,” she said. “Sorry. Thanks for today. We’ll get him. We’ll follow up on those other names and figure it out. I know we will.”
His face fell.
“Sure,” he said.
CHAPTER TWENTY
The diner was a small, unusual place on the corner of Columbus Avenue. The white exterior was paneled in glass and surrounded by larger brownstones.
Avery sat in a booth and stared out the window.
Drunken college students sat in a booth behind her. One of them had ordered a hamburger with beans, bacon, eggs, and he devoured it while two of his friends appeared ready to puke from the massive inhalation of food.
A dark, cloudy night sky was visible through the window. A quick flash of light appeared, then the rumble of thunder.
“
Hey,” someone said.
Jack stood overhead with a guarded smile on his face. Just as handsome as always, Avery thought. He had shaggy brown hair cut short in the back. He had piercing eyes and stubble on his face. A brown leather jacket was open over a teal-colored shirt. A strong chest and lean stomach were obvious.
“Hey.” Avery smiled. “Take a seat.”
Jack sat in the booth and took a moment to gaze at her features.
“You look good,” he said. “Except for the—” And he indicated the bruises that still marred her features.
“Yeah,” she flirted, “gang fight. You know how it is.”
Ugh, she thought. Settle down. This isn’t a date.
“I can’t even imagine,” he seriously replied. “It’s incredible what you do now. I never would have believed it.”
“Small-town girl living a big-time life.” She smiled.
“I appreciate you coming here,” Jack said.
“I was surprised you wanted to meet,” she admitted. “Glad, but surprised, especially since we’re supposed to have a picnic tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah,” he mumbled and lowered his gaze, “that’s what I wanted to talk about.”
A waiter appeared.
“You want to order something?” Avery asked.
“No,” he said. “Well, maybe a milk?”
“Milk?” Avery laughed. “Since when do you drink milk?”
“Milk,” he said to the waiter and then indicated Avery. “For you?”
“I’ll have coffee. Just coffee.”
“You won’t be able to sleep,” Jack mentioned.
The words made Avery bristle. One of the biggest fights they’d consistently had was his inability to let her live her life. The desire to “fix” her had been never-ending. No matter what was happening—it could be over something as mundane as coffee or a larger issue like deciding on a career path—Jack would offer his opinion, whether it was asked for or not, and then uphold a superior attitude if she chose something different.
“Coffee,” she reiterated to the waiter.
Jack raised his brows and shrugged.
“Been following you in the papers,” he said.
“Don’t believe everything you read.”
“I believe you’re a hero,” he said with an honest, intense gaze. Seriously, I’m impressed. When you left the law firm and said you wanted to be a cop? I thought you were crazy. But now?” He nodded. “You really did it, and it suits you. You look happy. You do.”
“Thanks, Jack,” she said with a hint of suspicion. “I am happy. Overworked, beat up, and tired, but happy. It’s been a long time since I could say that.”
“Yeah,” he said. “I know.”
Silence filled the air. The group behind them burst out laughing and Avery tried to think of something, anything, to say.”
“How about you?” she asked.
“I’m good,” he replied. “I’m in advertising now.”
“I heard. Congratulations, Rose told me. I never had you pegged as an advertiser.”
“I’m good at it,” he said. “Coming up with pitches, different angles for commercials and print ads. It’s fun. Pays the bills and takes my mind off other things.”
“No more outdoors for you?”
A sly smile gave him a debonair appearance.
“Are you kidding?” he said. “I’m out every weekend. No more tours. Those gigs just didn’t pay well, but the outdoors is my home. You know that. I keep trying to get Rose to go rock-climbing. She says it’s not her thing.”
“Not yet,” Avery noted.
“Not yet.” He grinned with a long deep stare. She boldly met his gaze. An intense expression lined his face when he glanced up.
The beat of Avery’s heart was strong in her chest. Thoughts about resuming her relationship with Jack had never been serious. Too much damage from the divorce and afterward had destroyed their foundation. But there was a spark, an undeniable connection they shared that was more than physical. We had a life together, Avery thought. A child.
The urge to reach out and grab his hand was strong.
“I’d like to talk about Rose,” he said.
His demeanor had changed, along with his tone. More businesslike and disappointed. His hands were cupped before him and his back was straight. Slightly off-put by his sudden serious air, Avery leaned back and tried to act casual. The coffee and milk had arrived. Avery doused her coffee in sugar and creamer.
“What’s up?” she asked.
“I heard you made a date with Rose and I tomorrow? A picnic? You’re supposed to come and meet us at Northeastern?”
“That’s right.”
“I’d prefer if you didn’t come,” he flatly stated.
Avery nearly spit out her coffee.
“What?”
“Look,” he mumbled and rubbed a hand through his hair. “I know you want to be a mom. You always have. You try, Avery. You really do. But being a mom has never really been your strong suit. I just think it’s a mistake to lead Rose down that path again.”
“I am a mom,” Avery lashed out. “Did you carry her in your womb for nine months? Did you go through thirty-two hours of labor?”
“That’s not what I meant,” he said.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m talking about acting like a mom!” he complained. “You—trying to be a mom. Perfect case in point. Earlier today. You invited her over to help you unpack at your new place. Great. I loved that. Good job. But then, you completely vanished! As always. Did you forget about her? Because Rose certainly thinks you did.”
“Everything worked out fine,” Avery said.
“In the end, sure,” he replied, “and I was thankful for that. Rose had a great time, but before that, she couldn’t get in touch with you for nearly forty minutes. She was driving around your neighborhood and freaking out. Finally she finds your apartment and you still don’t pick up. You know who does pick up his phone? Me. I’m the one that has to deal with her when you decide you don’t want to be a mom anymore. I’ve always been the one that picks up the pieces when you do or say something that breaks her heart.”
Avery felt like she’d slipped into a horrible dream.
“I can’t believe we’re having this conversation,” she said. “Rose and I had a great day today, and we’re going to have a great day tomorrow.”
“Are you sure?” he asked. “What happens if a call comes in? What happens if you have to cancel on her? What then?”
“Then we’ll figure it out.”
Jack laughed—a miserable, knowing laugh.
“See, that’s what I’m talking about,” he pointed out. “Listen to yourself. You’re already making cancellation a possibility. Being a parent means you’re there no matter what. When Rose is sick I take off from work. When she’s depressed I sit by her side and hold her and talk to her. You can’t just be a part-time mom.”
“My life is complicated,” Avery yelled. “I’m sorry if I don’t have a steady job where I just sit behind a desk and draw pictures and answer phones. I can’t just take off whenever I want. If a murderer is on the loose, I have to find them.”
“What about when you were a lawyer? You never had time for Rose then either.”
“If I remember correctly,” Avery seethed, “you didn’t have a job back then. I was the one paying the bills. All the bills. I’m sorry if I couldn’t just take off whenever I wanted to be the perfect mother. How dare you,” she hissed.
He sat back and shook his head.
“You haven’t changed at all,” he said. “I thought you were different. Rose swears you’re different, but you haven’t changed. You’re still married to your work, just like you always were, and that means that one day—maybe not tomorrow or the next—but one day, you’re going to let Rose down, again, and I’m tired of fixing your mistakes.”
“You don’t have to fix anything for me, Jack. We’ve been over for a long time.”
“Rose,” he said.
“This isn’t about me. It’s about Rose.”
Avery stood up and got in his face.
“Rose is a big girl now,” she hissed. “She can take care of herself.” A fake, menacing smile pulled at her lips as she stood tall.
“See you at the picnic,” she said and walked out.
“Twelve o’clock,” he called out after her. “Sharp!”
CHAPTER TWENTY ONE
Dammit! Avery thought.
It was stupid to meet with Jack after a long day, stupid to think things had changed and that maybe you could be a family again. Stupid! Ugh!
A light rain had begun to fall.
Fuming, all Avery could think about was the way Jack had set her up. He never wanted to meet and just talk. All he wanted to do was lecture me. Why couldn’t he do that on the phone? Why couldn’t you see it?
Dammit!
Mistake. It was a mistake. What other mistakes have you made?
The case came back to her. Venemeer, naked and positioned on a boat. Circle of friends and former employees. Desoto. Randall. The astrology professor.
She hopped in her car and called Ramirez.
His voicemail picked up.
Avery left a message.
“Hey, Dan,” she said, “just wondering if you ran the rest of those names given you by Venemeer’s contacts? Anyone have a record? Anything? Let me know.”
Why didn’t he answer? she wondered.
She sat in her car, listening to the pouring rain.
Ramirez doesn’t have to tell you anything, she realized. You’re not an item. You practically told him as much. You alienated Dan, you just had a fight with Jack, and you can’t stop thinking about this case.
Dammit, she realized. Jack is right. You’re still married to your work.
One of her former therapists had said the same thing: “Are you sure you aren’t using work to escape from the world, Avery?” Escape, she thought, and she saw herself running through the woods trying to escape her father, and being beaten in a foster home to the screams of other children.
