by M. Ullrich
“Imagine all the time you could’ve had if you were home on time for once,” Berit said harshly.
“Berit…” Florence’s soft voice and even softer eyes persuaded Berit to sit down. “So why doesn’t Lauren like you back?”
Berit’s face reddened, and Matt laughed. She shot daggers at her sister. “We’re just friends, and I’m okay with that. I actually set her up with Chester’s sister, Jennifer. They’re really hitting it off.”
“But you wish it was you,” Lou said, singsong tone louder than ever.
“I swear to God, Lou, I will cover you in gravy again.”
“Stop teasing your sister, Louise, and do not pour gravy on her again, Berit. It took forever to get it out of her hair that time.” Florence slid the gravy boat away from Berit.
Matt dropped his silverware onto his empty dish loudly. “Jennifer was pretty hot until she started looking like a dude.” He wiped his face and stood. “I’m going up to my room. I want to get some Skyrim in before I hit the hay. I’m working the morning shift with Dad tomorrow.” Matt ran up the stairs.
“If he’s gone, I’m gone.” Berit stood again and kissed her mother on the cheek. “Dinner was delicious as always. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, sweetie.”
“Good night, Dad,” Berit said, laying her hand on her dad’s shoulder and squeezing it. She turned to Lou and said with a smile, “You’re lucky you’re still alive. I’ll see you tomorrow at the bar.” Berit walked away, ignoring Lou’s middle finger.
* * *
“How did you learn to do these things with your tongue?” Bellamy punctuated her words with a low moan. Berit smirked and ran the tip of her tongue across Bellamy’s sensitive flesh, focusing her torturously light touch on Bellamy’s glistening labia. She wondered if Lauren had slept with Jennifer yet. No, she scolded herself, focusing her attention on Bellamy’s protruding clit. She sucked just enough to make Bellamy squirm. Would Lauren enjoy Berit’s talents as much as Bellamy was? An image of Lauren, aroused with disheveled hair flashed in her mind. Berit sat back and shook her head.
“Is everything okay?” Bellamy sat up from where she had thrown herself across Berit’s sofa. Berit knelt on the cushions and stared down at Bellamy’s supine body.
“Yeah, of course,” Berit said with a reassuring smile. She wrapped her arms around Bellamy’s bent legs and pulled her forward. She kissed Bellamy deeply and removed the rest of her clothing.
Berit traced Bellamy’s soft skin with her fingertips. Of all her lovers, Bellamy had the most enticing skin. It always seemed to be glowing and tasted sweet. Berit bit at Bellamy’s womanly hip. What did Lauren’s skin feel like? Did she mind a few bite marks? Berit stopped moving again. Thinking about Lauren was turning her on more than the woman below her. Bellamy ran her fingers through Berit’s shaggy hair, encouraging her to continue. Berit brought her left hand to the juncture of Bellamy’s thighs. She dipped her fingertips between swollen skin and sank into her hot center. Three of her fingers fit into Bellamy perfectly. She found a good rhythm in and out and kissed along Bellamy’s throat. Berit tried to focus on Bellamy’s rapid pulse and the feel of her inner walls contracting around her fingers.
Berit was quickly losing the battle of not thinking about Lauren. She crawled down Bellamy’s body and sucked her clit into her mouth once more. She sucked and licked ravenously, desperate to make Bellamy come just so she could stop this weird emotional betrayal. Her mind shouldn’t be filled with thoughts and images of Lauren, not her smile or laugh. Berit doubled her efforts, pushing Bellamy to the edge. Bellamy came loudly.
Berit stood and backed away from the sofa, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. What was wrong with her? This was not Berit. She focused on her lovers. She could even lose herself in them. Where naked women were concerned, Berit was a willing and captive audience. She felt a little panicked, and though she was no stranger to a random anxiety attack here and there, Berit felt like she couldn’t control her breathing.
“Wow,” Bellamy said, throwing her long, shapely leg over the back of Berit’s couch. She was everything erotic Berit had ever dreamed of. But she wasn’t Lauren. “I’ve never come that fast.”
“I can’t do this anymore.”
Bellamy lifted her head. Her face was glistening with sweat. “What?”
“This,” Berit said while motioning between them. She averted her gaze, suddenly shy with Bellamy’s nakedness. As if she wasn’t just inside her. “I’m sorry, Bellamy. I really am.” Berit felt heavy with guilt. She never treated a woman like a second choice or one of many. Even if Lauren thought she did. Stop thinking about Lauren! Berit was frustrating herself.
Bellamy started collecting her clothes. “What are you sorry for? You don’t owe me anything.”
“You’re stunning and so, so sexy. But I couldn’t—” Berit blew out a long breath. What could she say? “My mind is somewhere else instead of focusing on you.”
Bellamy stood and started to slowly walk toward Berit. “Hey, Berit?”
“I’m probably just stressed. They say stress really kills the libido.” She threw up her hands and widened her eyes. “Not that I wasn’t into this, what we did, but I couldn’t quite get to where I usually do.” Bellamy kissed Berit, but not passionately. Instead, it was kind and soft. Bellamy pulled back and placed her hand against Berit’s cheek.
“We’re just having fun, yes?”
Berit nodded.
Bellamy ran her thumb along Berit’s pout. “Do you have feelings for me?”
Berit stared into her dark eyes and shook her head.
“Good. Are we friends?”
“Absolutely,” Berit said without hesitation.
“Then sit down and tell me what’s wrong.”
Berit fell onto the sofa. Hugo chose that moment to walk from the bedroom and join Berit on the couch. He must’ve sensed his mom was having a crisis of sorts. Berit sighed. “I think my casual days are over.”
“I’m lucky to have been your last.” Bellamy patted Berit’s knee. “Does this mean you do have feelings for someone?”
Berit swallowed hard. Bellamy was her friend. If she could trust her enough with her body, she should be able to trust her with details of her crush. But something about her feelings for Lauren felt sacred. She placed her hand over Bellamy’s and ran her finger along the skin, savoring their last intimate touch. “I think I do. This isn’t the first time, of course, but it’s the first time I don’t know how to handle it.”
“That means this is the first time your feelings are real.”
Berit looked at Bellamy, obvious terror in her eyes.
“That’s a good thing, Berit. Who is it?”
“I’ll only tell you if you tell me yours first.” Berit smirked.
Bellamy considered this for a minute, her mouth screwed up delightfully. Berit would miss those lips. “I guess we’ll suffer in silence together, then.”
“Damn.” Berit snapped her fingers. “So what do we do now?”
“Exactly what we’ve been doing, except we stop fucking.”
Berit bobbed her head from side to side, thinking about what a platonic friendship with Bellamy would be like. She enjoyed the prospect. She picked up the remote from her coffee table and turned on the television. “I’m going to take a quick shower. Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Yes, but I’ll have to shower after you, and you’re going to order pizza.”
“Oh, am I?” Berit started toward the bathroom.
“Yes. I came over expecting to be fully satisfied. The one orgasm was great, but I need more.”
Berit laughed loudly. She pointed toward the bathroom door. “You shower first and I’ll order the pizza.”
Bellamy leapt from the couch and rushed around Berit. “Half pepperoni and half plain. Thanks.”
When the bathroom door shut, Berit felt a sense of peace wash over her. Talking to Bellamy, even vaguely, about her feelings lightened Berit’s mood. Perhaps Bellamy�
��s shoulder would be the one she’d cry on when Jennifer and Lauren lived their happily ever after.
Chapter Thirteen
Lauren needed the perfect outfit for her third date with Jennifer. She’d been given specific instructions to dress casually, but every woman knew a third date meant sex. Or at least some guaranteed heavy petting. So while Lauren wanted to follow Jennifer’s instructions, she knew at least her bottom layer had to be sexy. Lauren shivered as she pulled lace panties up her thighs. Excitement was a cheap descriptor for how she felt. Lauren hadn’t had honest sex, the kind of sex where you lose yourself to your partner instead of their motives, in a very long time.
They’d spent their second date strolling the beach in the early evening. Jennifer had held her hand lightly after their hands had bumped together enough times to make it awkward. They never lacked topics of conversation and even indulged in a picnic of sandwiches and snacks. Lauren enjoyed every second of their time together, even their brief good-night kiss interrupted by the delivery of Jorge’s Chinese food. Lauren was ready for more than a peck. Their first kiss was barely long enough to register if Jennifer’s lips were as soft as they looked.
Lauren was ready for whatever their third date would bring. She threw on a white T-shirt and skinny jeans before heading out of her bedroom. Rebecca was standing in the kitchen, one hand on the fridge as she watched Lauren walk to the front door. “Where are you heading to?”
“I have a date,” Lauren answered curtly. She ignored the shocked look on Rebecca’s face, but couldn’t ignore her when she called out for Lauren to wait. She had her hand on the doorknob—so close to freedom and getting to kiss Jennifer. “I really have to go.”
“I know,” Rebecca said, swiping a few stray hairs from her forehead. “I just wanted to check in. You’ve seemed really happy lately.”
“I am.” Lauren pulled the door open, but Rebecca pushed it shut.
“Tell me about your new job.”
“It’s great. I’m appreciated, and my coworkers are wonderful.” Lauren had practiced her response for weeks now. She didn’t want anyone knowing about her guest spot at the Dollhouse. Every night she worried Rebecca would saunter in with a supermodel on her arm and laugh at what her life had become. “Let me go.”
“And where are you working?”
Lauren looked at Rebecca’s glittering eyes and to the doorknob. She had to escape and manage to not mention her job before doing so. “I, uh—” Lauren’s phone rang. Thank God. She turned away from Rebecca and answered. “Hey you.”
“Hey yourself,” Jennifer said. “You ready?”
Lauren turned and stared at Rebecca defiantly. “Yes. I’m walking out the door as we speak. I’ll meet you at the car.” She made a show of opening the front door and slamming it in Rebecca’s face. Lauren practically ran to Jennifer’s car and climbed into the passenger seat before Jennifer could cut the engine. “Hi.”
“Hi,” Jennifer said, leaning across the console and kissing Lauren’s cheek. She pulled away from the curb without another word. She drove for quite some time before speaking again. “You look great,” Jennifer said, scanning Lauren’s body slowly.
Lauren felt herself blush. “I couldn’t look any more plain.” She touched her ponytail subconsciously. “I wasn’t sure what your definition of casual was, so I just threw this on. Where are we going?” Jennifer remained quiet and mysterious as she drove along highways and back roads for nearly twenty-five minutes.
Jennifer didn’t give the slightest indication they were close to their destination until she pulled her Audi into a large parking lot. She got out of the car wordlessly and opened Lauren’s door. Jennifer grabbed Lauren’s hand and intertwined their fingers. With her free hand, Jennifer pointed to a large, unmarked building. She smiled softly at Lauren. “We’re going roller skating.”
“Oh, dear God.”
“What?” Jennifer looked confused and slightly fearful for a brief moment. “Bad idea?”
“No, not a bad idea. I just can’t remember the last time I had wheels strapped to my feet. I’m not the most steady or smooth person.”
“Do you trust me to catch you if you fall?”
Jennifer’s smile beamed, the dimple on her left cheek on display, and Lauren was powerless to its charm. Lauren nodded.
“Great. I’ll protect you.”
Lauren swooned. “I bet you will.” She tugged Jennifer’s hand slightly to keep her in place. She looked up into Jennifer’s eyes before staring at her lips. Jennifer leaned down and brought their mouths within a whisper’s distance, but before Lauren got the kiss she was craving, a child bumped into them.
“Sorry,” the little brat called out before running off toward the restaurant that shared the roller rink’s parking lot. At least he had manners.
Lauren growled in frustration, which made Jennifer laugh. “Come on,” she said to Lauren. She tugged her toward the skating rink. “We can pick that back up later.”
“You seem pretty excited. Are you some sort of skating aficionado? Wait, don’t tell me. Roller derby.”
Jennifer laughed. She opened the door to the rink and ushered Lauren inside. “I’m not tough enough for roller derby. I have a friend who’s part of a local team—those women do not mess around.”
Lauren’s eyes grew wide when she spotted the large rink. Singles, couples, and groups weaved about and skated around. Some were more talented than others, but all seemed smooth and steady. She heard Jennifer say her name. “Huh?”
“What size skates do you need?” Jennifer pointed to her feet. “I’m a size nine and usually wear an eight in skates.”
“I’m a seven and a half,” Lauren said in a daze, completely entranced by everyone skating. She watched Jennifer run up to the rental counter and come back with two sets of skates. Her broad smile was contagious and calming. Maybe Lauren wouldn’t die today.
Jennifer must’ve noticed Lauren’s apprehension because she sat closely and touched her hand tenderly. “I used to skate every day. My family lived closer to the country than the city, and the only thing for kids to do was roller skate or swim. One of those activities was much easier to do year-round. Also, mostly girls were into skating.” Jennifer winked, making Lauren’s insides quiver.
Lauren’s eyes fell to Jennifer’s biceps as she tightened the laces of her skates. The short sleeves of her navy blue button up hugged the muscles tightly. Lauren cleared her throat and secured her own skates. “You’re very sexy,” she said in a quiet voice, but Lauren was still proud of her boldness for saying what she was thinking for once. If she wanted a relationship to be successful, she knew she’d have to dig deep for confidence.
“Yeah?” Jennifer stood and held out her hand. She pulled Lauren so their bodies were flush. She ran her hand down the length of Lauren’s back and came to rest on her hips. ”You’re pretty sexy yourself.”
Lauren was more focused on her unsteady wheels than the woman holding her. “This is a bad idea,” she blurted.
“Come on.” Jennifer guided her toward the smooth wooden floor of the rink. Most skaters kept to the worn, darkened ring along the perimeter. “I got you, remember? You can do this.”
Lauren looked into Jennifer’s eyes and soaked up her assurance. She nodded. “I can do this.”
One hour and two tender spots from a collision with the wall later, Lauren was laughing as they walked from the rink. Jennifer had stayed true to her word and caught Lauren every time her balance wavered. Lauren knew Jennifer’s hands had been all over her, but she was too preoccupied with fear to focus on that feeling. This led Lauren to the realization that she hated roller skating. What fun was being taught if you couldn’t fully enjoy your instructor?
Jennifer opened the car door for Lauren and waited for her to get in before getting behind the steering wheel and starting her car. She licked her lips, an action Lauren watched keenly. “Are you hungry?” Jennifer asked, making no move to put the car in drive.
“Now that I’m no lon
ger terrified, I think I am starting to feel a little hungry. Did you want to try that place?” Lauren pointed to the restaurant.
“I was thinking,” Jennifer said, shifting nervously in her seat. Lauren found the sight adorable. “I’m not the best cook, but if you like pasta and jarred sauce, I could make us dinner.”
Even if Lauren was allergic to pasta, she’d still have said yes. “Let’s go, then,” she said, placing her hand gently on Jennifer’s forearm.
Lauren quickly realized Jennifer wasn’t kidding when she said she wasn’t much of a cook. Jennifer ordered her to stay out of the kitchen while she prepped their meal. She took the time to explore the first floor of Jennifer’s Craftsman-style home. The large great room was filled with artwork and odds and ends. Jennifer liked floral art and nonfiction, judging by the books on one shelf. Lauren was happy to see she had a vast Blu-ray collection with movies spanning every genre. This gave Lauren hope Jennifer would enjoy lazy movie nights as much as she did.
The sound of the smoke detector broke Lauren away from her character study.
“It’s okay!” Jennifer called out from the kitchen. “Just a little burned bread. Pasta’s ready, though.”
Lauren sauntered back toward the kitchen just in time to catch Jennifer standing on a kitchen chair fanning the smoke away from the detector with a magazine. Finally, the beeping stopped. “I promise I didn’t burn the sauce.”
“I know the number of an Italian place nearby if you did.”
Jennifer hopped down from the chair and walked over to Lauren. She stood in Lauren’s space and smiled. “You do strike me as the kind of person who’s prepared for any situation.”
Lauren wanted to laugh in her face. “Not quite,” Lauren said. “But when it comes to food situations, I do like to have a few backup plans. Nothing can ruin a night like bad food.”
Jennifer looked back toward the smoking stove with a grimace. “Maybe you should call that Italian place.”
An hour later they sat, quietly finishing their takeout dinner. Lauren kept her dinner light, a salad of fresh mozzarella and tomatoes, knowing the anxiety of spending alone time with someone new would wreak havoc on her stomach. She could feel her palms grow sweaty as she pushed her plate aside. “I’m sure your pasta would’ve been good, but that was delicious.”
