by Brea Viragh
A skittering of awareness trembled along her skin as she turned to look at the water instead. It shivered up her spine and came to a rest at the base of her neck. Her body trembled and she wanted to run.
Her guard was nearly dropped when a familiar voice came from behind her.
“You better sit down. You look exhausted.”
And there he was. Standing there, looking down at her.
“Brock.” Joy she’d shut away came catapulting out of her. “You came back.” She could have gratefully launched herself at him but he was staring at her with such strange intensity she decided to check herself.
Life, she knew, didn’t stop, not even for magical worlds and tainted men. Thank god.
“I know it might be hard to understand right now,” he began through kisses, “but it was destined. You have to know she loved you very much.”
“It—” Nasira’s throat clogged. “It was necessary.”
“She did it for you. She did it for the world. And now, we’re free. We’ve won!” Brock swirled her into his arms and held her against him. “Nasira, I mean it. You and your sisters did a wonderful thing tonight. You did the impossible. You restored balance to the world.” He buried his face in her hair and breathed in deep. Then he jerked her away, glaring down at her. “Never, ever leave me tied to a chair again. It nearly ripped my heart out my chest when I came out here and saw you surrounded by a ring of fire. Do you have any idea how terrified I was? That man could have killed you. He knocked me for a damn loop before I came to.”
“I’m sorry, Brock.” Despite her anguish, she chuckled. “I have a feeling you’re going to get one hell of a black eye after this.”
The second she spoke, she understood. The rightness of her mother’s selfless gesture clicked into place and rang through her body. It was the only way Neret had known to be sure no one else would get hurt. Then, if only for a second, the hurt wasn’t quite so bad.
Hope straightened her spine and strengthened her resolve to live. Live for both of them. Once again, she was in control.
“Don’t think about it as a sacrifice.” He framed her face in his hands, running his thumbs along the softness of her cheeks. Knowing what was churning in her mind.
“I know.”
“Think of it like a new start.”
“Brock, I know.”
It had been a clearheaded decision on everyone’s parts. A risk to try in the first place. They prevailed, for this world, the people in it. For their family and their future. They did it to live. And they won.
“It was meant to end this way.” Swamped in a tide of feeling, Nasira leaned into him. “I hadn’t been prepared for it, not really. We’d gone over the possibilities and still missed out on one key component. Faith. When I was out there, standing with these three powerful women, I felt like I didn’t belong. Brock.” She stopped and gathered her thoughts. “When I saw their strength, their love and faith in each other, it was like a gift I didn’t think I deserved. I don’t know what would have happened if I hadn’t come to my senses.”
“But you did.”
“I did, and I felt the moment I accepted myself for what I am. It’s like these walls came tumbling down—”
“And there’s nothing you can do to stop it once you open up to it. We were there with you, you know. Elon and Morgan and Leo. And me. Once I came to, of course.” Brock took her hands in his and pressed them to her chest. “It’s strong magic.”
“I have magic. You know,” she said, easing back, “I didn’t think it was possible. I hadn’t opened myself up to it, and I didn’t want to take the chance that if I followed the desire in my heart and mind, I would fall short and let the others down. It was a fight every step of the way.”
“We’re a work in progress, Nasira. At least you stepped up to the plate. This was your fight to win. Our fight,” Brock insisted.
“And I wasn’t sure of it, at first. I wanted to be sure. But then seeing everyone else, how they interact with each other…it’s hard to be sure when you’re the outsider. You were there for me…you were there, telling me how much I meant to you. None of the bullshit.”
Brock shook his head. “None of the bullshit.”
“You were there telling me how much you loved me. I knew you would be there for me. I knew it without question. It gave me the strength to finish this.”
“And?” Brock stepped away until he was sure he had Nasira’s attention, their clasped hands in the air between them.
“When we were younger, I thought I loved you so much it felt like my heart was ready to burst. I realize now the feeling was selfish. Too entwined with my own needs and wants. It wasn’t the kind of all-encompassing love you deserved. It wasn’t good enough. You left, and I tried to make myself forget. I locked away my heart so I wouldn’t get hurt again. No, don’t judge! It was a practical move.” She turned her face away and brushed the hair from her forehead. “I’m used to being the one in charge and dealing with situations in my own way. I wanted you to come back, but I wasn’t willing to put in the effort. It was a wish. Something I wasn’t sure would ever come true.” She sighed. “Now you came back, and I’ve found the love is still there. It may be dusty, but it’s there, and real, even when I didn’t want to see it because I was afraid of getting hurt again. You pursued me and it was like a punch to the gut.”
“Nasira, you don’t have to—”
“Yes. I do,” she insisted. “You make me happy, Brock. Honest to goodness, feel it in my heart and soul happy.” She ran her hands down his arms, excited when his skin pebbled in goosebumps. The best reaction she could hope for. God, she didn’t want to stop touching him. “I understand the difference between how I felt then and how I feel now. This isn’t a girl’s love, a high schooler’s love. This is richer and deeper. It took a shift to get me to see it. I don’t need wishes and promises anymore. What I feel for you isn’t going to change. I know it without a shadow of a doubt. I want to be with you, to see our lives tangle and twine and come together in crazy ways.”
“You know I’ll never leave you.”
She stifled a grin, her heart melting. “I know. That’s not the point. I love you, Brock Lockhart. I love you without worry or hesitation. No regrets. I want to make a life with you and your daughter, and I want to be there for Callie with no conditions.”
“You’re too far away,” Brock said when Nasira stepped back to turn in a circle, raise her hands to the sky. It wasn’t a woman in front of him, he thought. This was a goddess who finally knew her own power. “You’re not close enough. Right here.” He pointed to a spot in front of him.
The power still seething inside of her stilled when his fingers came around hers. She felt like she was holding her breath.
“You,” Brock began, “and I are going to make something together. We are going to make a life, and this time, we’ll do it right. There’s no more holding back. No more selfish desires where we push the other away because we think it’s best. From here on out.”
Her gaze lifted to his. “From here on out,” she agreed.
He brushed away a smear of ash from her cheek. “How would you feel about moving your practice to Chicago?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I know you like the life of the small-town veterinarian, but I had a thought. I can see us here. You working in your gardens. Your sisters stopping over at the drop of a hat. Me and your brother slash brothers-in-law fighting over the best way to fix a lawnmower or grill a steak.”
“I don’t know. One of my soon to be brothers is a half-god. I think whatever way he decided would probably be the best way.”
“Hush. You’re missing the point.” He put his hand over hers and felt the sizzle and pop of their connection. “My brothers are scattered. My grandmother is happy to be wherever I am. And where I want to be is with you. I think, however, you would be happier here. With your family.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “My family.”
“Your mother might be
gone, but there’s a lot of love waiting to be given. Don’t you want the opportunity to grab it?”
“I do.”
“So make a life with me, Nasira. Here. We’ll figure out the rest later.”
“Yes,” she murmured, pressing her lips to his. “Yes, to everything.”
Grinning, Brock pulled her closer, his laughter surging through her body and mind and soul. “I promise you this. There’s no more running. We take what the other gives. And we’re starting now.”
She let him lift her off her feet. Didn’t feel the least bit embarrassed when her sisters crowded around her, their voices humming together in happiness, and the stars brilliant overhead.
EPILOGUE
Three months later…
Nasira cradled Callie in her arms and studied the gorgeous hazel eyes with their dark, impossibly long lashes. Tiny fingers with their tiny nails held on tight to the collar of her shirt and the toddler’s rosebud mouth curved in a sleepy smile.
“That’s right, sweetheart,” Nasira soothed. “It’s time for you to go to bed. You’re too young to stay up late. Next year, okay? It will be your first of many celebrations with your family. Just you wait and see. That’s it, sleepy girl.”
She uncurled one first and brought it to her lips. It was impossible not to want to hug the baby close and shower her with kisses. To keep Callie curled close against her chest. It gave her such pleasure. Especially when the little girl had taken to her with ease.
Nasira and Brock had finished unpacking the last box four days ago, their move finally coming to an end. It was a monumental occasion! The last tie to their old lives in Madison. The last line to clip on their path to starting fresh and putting the nonsense behind them.
With her family’s help, they’d managed to sign the deed on a twenty-acre plot of land in Lake County. It wasn’t easy moving with a toddler, as she soon discovered, but it was fulfilling. The end of an era.
It also wasn’t easy rebuilding from scratch without the familiarity of her town to fall back on. Friendly faces she recognized and knew, a wealth of memories and shared experiences to pull on.
She missed her mother terribly. The ache refused to go away.
Nasira took a moment to simply stare and enjoy the weight in her arms, the baby girl she’d fallen in love with the second they saw each other. Callie was the light of her life and filled the aching place in her heart she thought she’d covered.
Setting up shop with a local veterinarian followed shortly after the move, followed by her sister Aisanna’s wedding and a whole mess of family introductions where she still couldn’t remember anyone’s name.
Yes, hi, nice to meet you. Who are you, again?
She’d get it. Eventually.
It was a whirlwind of activity. Enough to warrant a serious vacation. She thought about the week they booked in Florida and knew next week couldn’t come soon enough.
It wasn’t all laughter and smiles, she knew.
An enclave from the Claddium showed up at the house three days after the equinox, carrying with them a healing Varvara on a gurney. The missing Cavaldi missus. Worse for the wear and madder than a shark deprived of its kill, but alive.
It was difficult for Nasira at first. To be around her sister’s mother when she didn’t have her own. On the worst days, she and Varvara were bitter and resentful toward each other. On the best days, they tolerated each other. But they tried to make it work. After everything they’d been through, they were trying. An ongoing process, she knew, but they made the best of it because that’s what family did.
A throat cleared and Nasira turned slowly to look over her shoulder. “Hi. When did you get here?”
Thorvald approached cautiously, taking great pains to keep his footsteps light and his voice low. Not to wake the snoozing baby. “A few minutes ago. I rode in with Zenon.”
“Is Varvara with you?” She didn’t want to appear impolite.
“She’s taking the day to rest. Nothing I said could persuade her otherwise. She’s still not feeling like herself. It took the best healers alive to get her back to normal and…she’s resting.”
“Is it…” Nasira paused. “It wasn’t because of me. Right?”
“Sweetheart, no. It wasn’t you. I know we’re all adjusting to the new normal, but Varvara, she has a giving heart. You’ll see. You two are gonna get there someday. I know it.”
She smiled in appreciation. “Thanks.”
“And there’s my girl.” The smile on his face was real. He reached out a thumb the size of a banana in comparison and touched the sleeping Callie’s forehead. “She’s getting so big. Did she grow a couple inches since last week?”
“I don’t doubt it, she’s growing more every day. And snacking on anything she can find. You wouldn’t believe the things she puts in her mouth.”
“Trust me, I would. Do you want me to take her?” Thorvald said hesitantly. Holding out his arms. “I’m not really in a celebratory mood, after all. I think I’d like to just sit in the car and watch from a distance.”
“Um, okay. Are you sure?”
She swallowed. Family, she thought. Her new family. Her father and Brock’s baby—her baby—who seemed so small and fragile in the arms of her “grandfather.”
“Here you go. Dad.” She tested the word. Found it not nearly as strange as the first time she’d said it.
“Thank you. My first grandchild.” He chuckled low and sent a smile her way. Delighted with the idea.
Unable to resist, Nasira slipped an arm around his waist. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For not making this weird.”
“I always strive for just that.” With his free hand, Thorvald stroked down his daughter’s hair and landed a kiss on the top of her head. “Go. Enjoy yourself. The others are waiting for you.”
“You sure you have this?”
“Of course. I think I can handle a baby. She’s a Cavaldi,” he insisted.
“Technically, no. She’s not.”
He stared down at the resting Callie. Then shot his daughter a smile. “She will be.”
A strange twisting sensation sent her heart into overdrive and Nasira bit the inside of her lip to keep from crying. I will not cry in front of him, she tried to tell herself. Her left eye had different plans.
Instead of giving into emotion, she wiped her face dry and walked in the opposite direction. “Don’t run to me if she wakes up when the fireworks go off.”
Thorvald suppressed a shudder. “Nasira, maybe you should—”
She was already out of earshot. Sort of.
They’d set up a picnic area close to the water’s edge, about a mile down the beach from where they’d made their last stand.
Transition. It was the theme of her life lately. Trying to work around the changes and get used to the new normal where there were no rules. No strict set of regulations for how she should live her life. She was back on the roller coaster ride and, this time, she didn’t feel the need to get off and run screaming far away. She rode the highs, she handled the lows.
And she’d torn up her list.
It didn’t make sense to worry about checking things off. She’d forgotten how to live. How to be in the moment and appreciate all of life’s faults and failures. All of the precious times she might have missed with her entire attention focused on achieving goals written down on a piece of paper.
She approached the four large blankets her sisters set up and felt the weight of their smiles.
“There you are,” Astix said, tossing her hair over her shoulder.
“I had to wait until the baby was nearly asleep.” Nasira folded her frame on the ground Indian-style. “Dad offered to take her in the car and watch her.”
“Good. He can deal with the little harpy when she wakes up,” Brock added, lifting a brow at his joke.
“I told him the same thing.”
Nasira leaned in close, delighted when Brock did the same, his lips pressed lightly down on hers
.
“Save it for later, you two.” Morgan handed a plate of food down to Karsia. “I want to see the real fireworks. Not what happens when you lock lips.”
“You’re fresh,” Nasira admonished.
It was so strange, she thought, staring around at the circle of faces. Walking into the arms of her sisters. Knowing she was surrounded, protected, loved. Knowing she didn’t need to worry anymore, didn’t need to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders, because they were there for her. Her brother, who had taken off right after Aisanna’s wedding. Her father.
Her husband.
But that was a secret no one knew about yet. Something they’d done spur of the moment, keeping close and savoring. She’d tell the others soon enough. When she was ready.
The light of the moon echoed off the diamond solitaire on her right ring finger. She spared it a glance before Brock’s hand came down on her shoulder.
“What’s wrong?” he murmured. “It’s like you’re not here.”
She lifted her face to the sky and smiled. “I’m here. Trust me. I’m just excited.”
“About the fourth of July celebrations?”
“About everything. Look around us, Brock.” She smiled at her soul mate. “Look at what we managed to do. What we managed to achieve. It’s symbolic, in a way. And there’s power in that.”
She would never stop missing her Neret. She missed walking over to her house and spending a lazy afternoon there, talking about whatever popped into their heads and laughing. Always laughing. There were times she picked up the phone to call and only then realized no one would answer.
That stung the most.
Then Nasira stared up into the clear, cloudless sky. At the full moon and the twinkling diamond stars and knew her mother was there. Watching. Loving them from a distance. And when Nasira felt a ghost hand on her shoulder, she had to smile.
Where she had lost one, she’d gained many. It didn’t make up for the loss…but it helped.
