by Ivy Rose
Looking at myself in the cracked mirror. The smeared blood in my reflection. It's all so fitting, because just like that mirror, I feel broken. The jagged pieces stick into my skin and I’m fucking bleeding out, but no one can see. They don't understand—no fucker understands, not even Avery.
They don't know what it’s like to live in the darkness, how hard I have to fight to not let it consume me, to not let the evil that lives in my own breath win. I keep my demons in their cage far away from Avery, but I see them now, swirling in my eyes, taunting me, smirking at me.
I shake my head, punching the mirror and more blood smears.
I won't let them get ahold of me. My girls need me and I’m not letting them down.
When Avery wakes, because she will. I'm going to be there looking down at her, then I’m going to spank that ass of hers so she can't sit down for a fucking fortnight.
The door pushed open. “Stone, the doctor’s back.” Carter’s voice is hoarse.
I barge past him as I rush to the room.
The doctor sees my hand but doesn't say anything. A sad smile pulls at his lips.
“Your daughter was born at 6:05 p.m. She was quiet, taking the world in. She is healthy. Even with being early, she is doing amazing.”
I nod my head. My chest clenches and my heart tightens.
I'm a daddy. My baby girl is alive here in this world.
Relief consumes me. “When can I see Avery?” I’m smiling so wide.
The doctor looks at me. “I'm sorry, Mr. Stone. Avery lost a lot of blood. We had to do a blood transfusion. The next twenty-four hours will give us a better picture.”
I grab the doctor by his coat, pushing him against the wall.
“What are you not saying? I see it in your fucking eyes, tell me.”
The doctor swallows hard before hanging his head. When his eyes meet mine, the truth has me taking a quick step back.
“You need to call anyone that should be here. Go sit with her. I'm sorry, Mr. Stone. Your wife is a fighter and she fought hard until that little girl was born, but she’s…we’ll know more tomorrow.”
I hear screams and sounds behind me. I feel a hand on my shoulder but I shrug it off. They all might have given up on my girl, but they don't know. She won't leave me.
“Where is she?”
She needs to hear me. She needs me to hold her, to make her better. She fucking damn well needs me.
I walk into the room, stopping quickly. I grab the bed for support as I see her. She looks so damn small in that bed. There are so many tubes, I don't know where I can touch her. What if I hurt her?
I grab a chair, pulling it over. Threading her dainty fingers through mine, I rub my thumb over her wedding finger.
“Baby, we have a daughter, a beautiful little girl. She’s here. You did it, baby.”
Her heart rate spikes and the nurse who has been watching the machines smiles.
“Keep talking to her. She knows your voice. That’s the first time I’ve seen her heart rate pick up.”
There are a million things I want to say to her, but I can't think of one that means enough. I squeeze her hand tightly. “You rest, beautiful. I’m here, baby. I’m always here for you.”
Avery’s mother walks into the room. Her legs shake as she sees Avery, her hand covering her mouth as silent tears roll down her cheeks. Then, she closes her eyes, straightens her back, and walks to the other side of Avery. Leaning in, she moves Avery’s hair off her face.
I shake my head, stopping her. It’s only my touch I want her to feel. The nurse said she reacts to me. It’s my touch that I want to bring her back and my voice she’ll follow, guiding her out of the darkness. Just like she saved me, I'll save her. I’ll bring her home.
“Juliet is beautiful, like a little angel. You should go see her.”
I shake my head. My heart hurts for my baby girl who is probably scared and doesn’t know what’s happening, but I can't leave Avery. She needs me more.
I look up at Avery’s mom. “Can you look after her? We promised she would never be alone or scared.”
She sucks in a shuddering breath. “Dominic, she’s not. We've all been with her. Carter is with her now. I promise you, someone will always be there. Okay?”
I nod. I know I should say something or thank her, but instead I trace Avery’s face. It's like I am seeing her for the first time, memorizing every delicate feature, the way her dark lashes lay on her cheeks, the way her bottom lip is pouty than the top. I kiss her cold lips as if she is a princess and I'm her prince, my kiss alone able to wake her, but I was never the hero of our story. I was born a villain. Villains never get their fairytale ending.
A gasp sounds from behind. Turning, I see Cecelia at the door. “I am sorry. I came as soon as I heard.” She walks up to me. “Oh my God, Dominic. Juliet is beautiful, she looks just like you.”
I shake my head. “No, she looks like Avery.”
I don't turn as the door opens. I don't take my eyes off Avery, I know her father is next to me. As he takes a seat, I brace myself for the anger I deserve. I let his baby girl get hurt. I should have protected her. If it was me, I would make the pain slow and torture every last breath out. When he doesn't say anything, I lift my eyes.
He has tears streaming down his face as he studies his daughter. He looks at me. “I’m so fucking sorry, son. When Avery came to us, telling us that you two were together…” He rubs the back of his neck. “You were every father's worst nightmare. Avery never had an interest in men. The only boyfriends she had came from her books. Then she came home to tell us she was in love with you and everyone knows the Stone name.”
He shakes his head. “We asked her to stop dating you, but she wouldn't. She was so angry at us. For the first time in her life, Avery went against us. She snuck out to see you. I knew you always watched her come home until she was safe inside, but that angered me more. I wanted you to be a fucking punk and make her cry so I could beat your ass.”
I open my mouth, but he sits forward. The pain in his eyes stops anything I was going say.
“I will never forgive myself for making her choose between the both of us. I thought I was losing her. She had been my little girl and I wasn't ready to share her. My selfish ways cost so much. I judged you wrongly for that. I never got to walk her down the aisle, to see her marry the man she loves.
“Because Dominic, my daughter loves you in a way only Avery knows how to love. It’s so rare. Even when she was little, you could see it. When she walks into a room, everyone notices. They’re drawn to her because there’s something innocent about her you want to protect, but you can tell she’s strong. Most of all, it's her eyes. They tell you exactly how she's feeling. When she shows her emotions, you can feel them, and the moment she told me she loved you, I knew it was true. I saw it. I fucking felt it. Anyone around you both can feel it.
“Thank you, for loving my daughter like no else could, for giving her the love she truly deserved. I will never be able to forgive myself for these years I missed.”
My knuckles turn up as I hold on to bed rail. “You're wrong. You should have beaten my ass.”
He snorts, raising his eyebrow. “That wouldn’t have stopped you.”
I look at my beautiful wife, shaking my head. “Nothing would have stopped me. The moment I saw her, I knew she was my reason. All the shitty stuff in my life didn't matter because loving her changed everything I knew, everything I believed. She was like seeing the sun after a time of blindness, the star that lightened up a lifetime of darkness, the lighthouse that guided me out of hell to a place I never knew existed, a place I didn't dare dream of. Avery saved me in the school corridors and now she’s lying here, fighting for her life, because she saved me again.”
I bare my teeth and my lips curl up.
Her dad stands. “Because she loves you, Dominic. Are you telling me you wouldn’t have done the same?”
I stand up, my stance wide in a pose I know intimidates most men. “In a fucking
heartbeat. She’s mine to protect. Don't you think I've prayed to every fucking God there is for me to be the one lying there?”
Her dad looks at his daughter before turning back to me. “Then don't doubt my daughter’s love for you. To her, you were worth saving. Don't let her down.”
I turn my head away. I don't want to hear anymore. I know Avery loves me. I saw it in her eyes. It gives me the air to breathe, the hope. It's what keeps the monsters at bay. I can already feel them scratching my skin.
I don’t know what time it is only at the sun set or maybe its fallen from the sky? Everyone has gone home saying they be back tomorrow. I crawl onto the bed next to her, needing to be close. I bury my head in her hair, placing a kiss just under her ear.
“Beautiful, if you can hear me, I need you to save me one more time.”
Two weeks later
Avery
I look over at my husband, running my fingers through his hair.
“Dominic.”
His eyes flutter as they land on mine. “Beautiful?”
I smile. “Hey, handsome.” He looks up at me, my heart stutters at the sight. He’s lost weight overnight.
He jumps up. His dark eyes turn jade green as he takes me in. Before I can blink, his lips land on mine, pushing, demanding. It’s a kiss that breaks all others. As our tears fall, pain and love mix together.
People like to think love is gentle, soft, kind, just like a feather floating on the summer wind, but love can hurt. It can be the sharp blade that cuts the deepest. Love is your heart’s greatest wish, yet biggest fear. It wants to love and to be loved, but a heart knows only love is truly capable of breaking it.
“I thought I lost you.” His voice is raw.
I grab his face between my hands. “Never.” I place my palm against his chest. “I will always be here.”
Covering my hand with his. “There is no one else who owns it, Avery. When I gave it to you, it was for forever. ”
I kiss his lips. “You haven't been to see Juliet?”
He shakes his head, looking so torn. “I couldn't leave you, but she’s not alone. Your mom, dad, Carter and Cecelia have all been with her. She is never alone just like we promised.”
I take in my broken husband. “I'm so sorry.”
He grits his teeth, his jaw tense. “What were you fucking thinking?”
Oh, he's pissed, seriously pissed.
That makes two of us. “I was saving the life of the man I love. Don't you see it, Dominic? To me, you’re everything. You might doubt being worthy of my love. I don't care about your past. It made you the man I love, the man who showed me a love that most people don't even know exists.”
He kisses me. This time it's slow, leisurely. Breaking the kiss as a single tear rolls down his face. “Beautiful, seeing you covered in blood…”
I place a finger on his lips, shaking my head. “No, don't think of that, not now. Just hold me. I want to you hold me like only you ever could.”
He tightens his arms around me, so strong yet so carefully. The light catches something, sending hundreds of flecks around the room. It’s so beautiful.
“Dominic, look.”
His eyes widen. As he wraps his arms around my waist, we watch the dancing display.
“It’s just like you. It shines so brightly, it hypnotizes you. So beautiful.”
I smile, leaning into him. “I heard that a lot when I was younger, but nobody ever made me feel it like you did.” I turn in his arms, grinning up at his handsome face. “Remember our first date?”
A smirk covers his face. “Yeah, I took you to that fancy restaurant.”
I can't help the laugh. “Pillars.”
He nods, grinning. “I sat there, opened the menu, and didn't understand a fucking word.”
A full laugh comes from me. “It was in French. Then we went to that little burger place. We sat and talked all night. Well, I talked. You just listened.”
His smirk transfers into a smile as he holds my face. “Because your voice sounded like the sweetest melody. I could listen to you talk forever.” He places a long kiss on my forehead. “Our wedding day…God, I didn't think you could get any more beautiful, but when I saw you, Avery, it was like looking at an angel. I couldn't believe that you were actually mine, that someone so good could love me.”
I start to sway. “Dance with me, Dominic.”
He looks around, his eyes wide. “Here? Now?”
I lean into his chest. “Right here, right now.”
He holds me tightly to his body as we start to sway. “Hold me, oh hold me in your arms, I see that I am all you need, You’ll keep me safe from harm, tell me… we are all what you believe, cause I can see you are everything… that I will ever need…” I instantly know the song is one of my favorites. “Hold Me” by Amy Wadge.
I close my eyes at his low husky voice in my ear, the way he holds my body so carefully. This moment I will carry with me forever.
He pushes the hair out of my face and tucks it behind my ear, his fingers lingering in my hair.
“Why do you always do that?”
Dominic looks me in the eyes. “So I can see your eyes.”
I trace my fingers over all his face, cataloguing every feature to memory.
He captures my hand, kissing each of my fingertips. “I have never seen you look so beautiful, Avery. You take my breath away. I missed you so fucking much.” He takes my lips desperately, his hands roaming over me as if making sure I’m really here.
A nurse walks in with Juliet.
“Is that…”
She smiles, passing her to me.
The moment she is placed in my arms, a love I never knew was possible washes over me, the love of a mother. I look at her little face. Her green eyes, just like her daddy’s, stare back at me. Her chubby cheeks, her pink lips, ten tiny fingers and toes. She’s perfect, so perfect. “She’s so beautiful.” I can’t take my eyes off her.
Dominic moves to us so he’s sitting behind me, his chin on my shoulder as he holds us both in his arms. “I can't believe I got this. I dreamt of this moment.” He kisses my temple, breathing me in.
I can't take my eyes of our daughter. Looking at her, I see everything she’s going to do with her life.
I laugh. “She’s strong, just like you.”
I feel him smile against my neck. “I bet she’ll be as stubborn as you, too.”
I kiss his lips quickly. “You love my stubborn ass.”
“I love everything about you.”
Dominic kisses, whispering something to Juliet before placing her back in the basket. She looks so small and tiny in his big arms.
We lie on the bed facing one another, our eyes drinking each other in.
“I was so scared, beautiful, that I would never get to see you again, that you would leave me.” He sounds like a lost little boy.
“I could never leave you, Dominic. I'll always find you. I promise, I’ll always find you.”
His kiss starts gently, like being touched by a feather, before he takes the kiss deeper until we are no longer two, but one.
“Let's go outside.”
He looks at me the way he does every time he's about to argue.
“Please.”
He shakes his head. “I would capture the moon if you asked.”
We sit in the sunlight.
I lift my head up, taking in its warmth. “So many people take for granted that tomorrow is going to come that they don't stop and take in the things that really matter.”
Dominic pulls me closer until I have to tilt my head back to look at him.
“Like the sun. We all go about our day as if we are certain it will appear tomorrow. We never stop to admire it, but what if tomorrow it failed to rise? We’re all so concerned with having the perfect life and beautiful things, but if we just stopped for a second and looked around, we would notice the world has so much beauty in it. It’s sad that people don’t notice the warmth of the sun, the gentle breeze, the sweet melody of the
birds, and the sound of the ocean until it's too late.”
Dominic holds me tightly, his eyes full of raw pain. “The last two weeks, I lived in that world where the sun doesn't rise, the wind stops blowing, the birds fail to sing, the ocean lies still. That isn’t a world. It's hell. Because baby, only with you in my arms am I sure a heaven exists.”
I look up into my husband’s beautiful face, placing my hand on his cheek. “How did I end up so lucky?”
Leaning in, taking my lips. “I ask myself that question every day.”
We walk back to the room hand in hand.
As I get back on the bed, Dominic sits in his chair.
“Get up here.” I grin patting the bed.
He smirks but doesn't hesitate. Wrapping his whole body around me.
Placing a single kiss on his lips. “I fucking love you, Dominic Stone.”
He smiles against my lips. “I fucking love you, Avery Stone.”
He places his head on my chest.
Running my fingers through his hair, I hear his breath even out. “I will always love you, Dominic. Even in my dreams, I find you in yours.”
Dominic
The high-pitched alarm echoes in the room. I lift my head, my eyes wide with panic.
No, no, no.
Nurses run past me.
One stops. “Sir, you need to move back.”
My eyes never leave my wife. “Avery. Beautiful?” I feel two strong arms holding me back as they all run over. “I can't lose you.” I don't know if I scream it or whisper it. I can't hear anything over my frantic heartbeat.
“Stand back.” The doctor shouts, and everyone takes a step back.
I watch as they shock my beautiful wife’s body, the pain trying to break through my body. I can’t breathe. I can’t think. I can't do anything but keep staring as they try to bring my beautiful, my wife, back to me.
She never woke up. It was a dream. She was saying goodbye. She already knew she was leaving.
