by Sybil Bartel
But I wasn’t.
Sick, I pulled out of his grasp, and he let me.
Leaning back in my seat, I stared straight ahead. “You can drop me at your hotel, or in town. Whichever is easiest.”
He sat back in his seat. “What the fuck just happened?”
“I don’t know what you mean.” Trying to keep my voice even, I prayed like hell he would drop it. I didn’t want to have this conversation. I didn’t want to have any conversation. I wanted to go somewhere by myself and hide for a decade.
“You know exactly what I mean.”
Inhaling, I chose my words as carefully as I could, because he had defended me to my shit family. “Look. I know why you’re here and what you want.” My hands twisted in my lap, and the next words hurt far worse to say than I could’ve ever imagined. “You don’t have to pretend to be my friend or defend my virtue to my shitty family just to get what you want. I’ll take care of your friend’s business.” I already had, but for some reason, I didn’t tell him that.
His nostrils flared, and for one whole minute, he didn’t say anything. He just stared at me.
Then he threw the SUV back in drive and muttered, “Put your seat belt on.”
UN-FUCKING-BELIEVABLE.
Did she think I didn’t have any fucking self-control? That I punched her piece-of-shit brother out because I had a fucking temper? That I was defending her virtue?
What the actual fuck?
I floored the engine and drove toward the nearest shit-smear town. I didn’t know if I was more pissed at her for being fucking blind or myself for actually giving a shit about this girl.
And she was a girl.
She was too damn young for me, and I had no fucking business thinking about the goddamn what-ifs. If she was pregnant, I’d deal with it. I’d be there for my kid.
My kid.
Jesus fuck, the thought alone made my chest tight and anger surge. I’d never been so fucking stupid with a woman before. Never. But a goddamn Hollywood pain in my ass spread her legs in front my plate and I’d had to fucking have her.
Goddamn it.
A half hour later, two towns over, I was pulling into a brand-name pharmacy, thankful I didn’t have to deal with some small-town shit. I pulled into a parking spot and threw the engine into park, but I didn’t turn it off.
“Wait here,” I ordered. The last thing I needed was someone recognizing her right now.
She smirked. “Where am I going to go?” She gestured across the parking lot. “The dollar store?”
Who fucking knew with this chick? It’d taken me days to find her. “Lock the door after I get out. Don’t open it until I come back.”
She saluted me. She fucking saluted me. “Yes, sir.”
I shoved the door open.
“Hey.”
I glanced back at her, raising an eyebrow. “What?” Christ, she was beautiful with no makeup.
For a second she looked at me and I would’ve sworn I was looking at the real woman, not the actress. Then her expression hardened and she fake smiled. “Don’t bother getting any condoms.” She waved a finger between us. “It’s not happening.”
Pissed off, I threw her shit right back on her. “Who says I was getting them for you?” I slammed my door and pounded my fist once on the window. “Lock up.”
I didn’t wait to hear if she followed my instructions. I strode into the store and went looking for something I never thought I’d be buying in the middle of fucking Iowa, let alone any state.
Five minutes later, I was in over my head.
“Do you, um, need any help, sir?”
I glanced toward the voice, and a barely legal, blonde-haired, blue-eyed chick who could’ve been Audrina’s cousin blushed at me. “I mean…” She pointed at the pregnancy tests. “Do you have any questions?”
“You gonna answer them for me if I did?” Christ, she looked about an hour past her eighteenth birthday.
She blushed harder. “Well, I mean, not that I have any personal experience using them.” She laughed uncomfortably. “But I know, um, which ones, people, um, usually buy.”
Jesus fucking Christ. I grabbed the one that promised early results. “Where’s the soda?”
She exhaled like she was relieved I hadn’t asked her something else and pointed across the store. “The cold case toward the back. There’re lots of choices.”
Fucking great. I strode over, grabbed a soda, and went to the checkout. The jail-bait chick quickly hustled behind the register and smiled.
“Do you need anything else today, sir?”
I fished my wallet out, threw down some cash and leveled her with a look. “Don’t get any personal experience,” I warned.
Her cheeks heated again. “Excuse me?”
I held up the pregnancy test before shoving it in my cargo pocket. “Wait till you’re married before you need one of these.”
She laughed uncomfortably again. “Don’t worry, I don’t plan on it, sir.” She handed me my change. “But thank you for the advice.”
I tipped my chin and walked out. Two strides before the SUV, Audrina glanced up and unlocked the door. I got in and handed her the damn soda. “Here.”
She took it and looked at it strangely. “You got me ginger ale?”
“Yeah.” I backed out of the spot.
“Well.” She sighed. “Now I feel like an ass.”
She should. I didn’t say shit.
“Thank you,” she said sincerely.
“Welcome,” I muttered, pulling back onto the only road through town.
She opened the drink and took a sip. “Where are we going?”
Back to Miami. “Motel.”
“Because that’s a solid plan.”
“You’re ready to drive back to Miami, I’ll keep going.” I was tired as fuck from driving all night, but if she said the word, I’d man up.
“That’s an even worse plan.”
My jaw ticked. “Why?”
She threw her hands up. “I don’t live in Miami, okay. I don’t live anywhere. And you just took me from the one place I did live, so what the hell do you expect me to say? Yay, road trip?”
Goddamn it.
I pulled over. I didn’t want to have this conversation on the side of the road, but fuck. Fuck.
I threw the SUV in park and looked at her. “I found out your real name last night at midnight when I was in fucking Kansas, after spending nine goddamn days reconning every damn street named Oak. I was twelve hours away, and I drove through the night. I’m fucking tired. We’re going back to the dump of a motel I checked into an hour ago so I could shower, then we’re gonna take a fucking nap. When we wake up, if you don’t feel like puking, we’re gonna eat a goddamn meal together. Questions?”
She hesitated only a fraction of a second. “Will french fries be involved?”
HE BLINKED. TWICE.
“And a milkshake?” Because I really missed dairy.
He stared at me a moment longer. Then he gave me a clipped single-word answer. “Yeah.”
I inhaled deep and let it out slow. “Okay.” Milkshakes I could handle.
He pulled back on the road, and a half hour later we were in a town south of where I’d grown up that I’d never spent any time in. Not that I’d spent time anywhere growing up except the farm.
Maneuvering the giant Escalade into a lot built long before giant SUVs, Tank parked and cut the engine. “Wait there.” Getting out and rounding the front of the vehicle, he scanned the almost empty lot and dark sky before opening my door. “Come on.”
Thunder cracked overhead as I got out of the SUV.
Tank grabbed my backpack and put his arm around my shoulders as he ushered me up rickety stairs and down the length of the outdoor corridor barely wide enough for the two of us. The motel was a long way from the hotel penthouses and suites I’d lived in for the past decade, but I didn’t realize how different until he opened the door at the very end with an actual key.
I looked around the sm
all, drab room that smelled faintly like mildew as he locked the dead bolt and threw the chain. “There’s only one bed.”
“I’m not gonna try and fuck you right now.” He tipped his chin at my feet. “Jeans and boots off. Get in bed.” He tossed his keys and cell on the nightstand then took his gun out of his back waistband and set it down.
I stood there, just taking in the sight of him. “You’re bossy.”
He pulled his T-shirt over his head as he stepped out of his own boots. “You have no idea.”
My pussy tingled, because I had a really good idea. I eyed the uncomfortable-looking side chair. “I’m not that tired.”
He stepped up to me, but he didn’t touch me. “Clothes off, or I take back what I said.”
Nerves and anticipation coursed through my veins. “That seems kinda backward—take your clothes off so I won’t fuck you.”
His intense gaze ratcheted up a thousand degrees. “Do not test me right now, Jensen.”
Hearing him call me by my last name instantly killed the tingle between my legs. Kicking off my boots, I undid my jeans. “You know what’s not sexy?”
“You taking off to fucking Iowa?” He yanked the bedspread that’d seen better days off the bed.
“No.” But I took note of his tone and statement and filed it away to think about later. Much later. When I had a plan to get away from him so I didn’t fall right back in bed with him. The irony wasn’t lost on me as I slid my jeans down my legs. “You calling me Jensen isn’t sexy.”
“Wasn’t meant to be.” He took his pants off and threw them over the back of the side chair. “Get in bed.”
“Yes, sir.” Thankful I’d worn underwear today, I saluted him and crawled on to the queen-sized bed that looked way too small for him alone, let alone the two of us.
Without hesitating, he got in beside me, angled my back to his chest, and slid one giant arm under my head and the other over my waist.
His unique scent, all power and man and soap, washed over me. Inhaling deep, I curled into him as I wrapped my hands around his forearm. Not realizing how tired I was, I exhaled and my eyes fluttered shut.
For three heartbeats, I was in heaven.
Then he took me completely off guard.
“I didn’t spend ten days of my life looking for you just so I could tell you to make a phone call.”
Shocked, I turned and glanced up at him. “Then why did you come for me?”
Incredulous, he shook his head. “Fuck, woman. Seriously?”
Yes. No. I didn’t know. Not knowing what to say, I stared at him.
He shook his head again, then closed his eyes. “Go to sleep.”
That was it? “You’re going to drop a loaded statement like that and not follow it up?”
“You don’t want me to follow that up,” he replied, not opening his eyes.
“Why?” I stupidly asked.
“Because…” His eyes opened and his intense gaze focused on me. “The only way I’m gonna follow that up is by sinking so deep inside that tight pussy of yours and pounding out my frustration for as long as it took me to get here.”
I sucked in a sharp breath as liquid desire pooled between my legs.
“But before that happens, you and I have a lot of shit to talk about. And right now, I’m too damn tired, so we’re sleeping.”
Shocked, miffed, elated, horny, I was all of it. But the only thing that came out was a whispered protest. “What if I’m not tired?”
“Go to sleep, Audrina,” he warned.
Holding his gaze for a moment, I fought a smile. Then I closed my eyes.
A second later, he exhaled and I felt his head shift on the pillow next to me.
“Old man,” I whispered.
“Watch it,” he growled.
I dared a peek at him and all of his shirtless glory. His eyes were closed, but the corner of his mouth twitched up.
I gave in to the smile I’d been holding back.
Then I snuggled into his strength and safety and fell asleep.
SHE SLEPT LIKE THE DEAD.
I’d woken up a few hours later, and she’d still been out. I’d extracted myself, thrown my clothes back on, and run out in the pouring rain for fast food. Now I was back, and she was still sleeping. I wanted to crawl in bed with her, but the milkshakes were getting warm.
I sat on the edge of the small-as-fuck bed and fingered a strand of her soft hair. “Audrina.” She was fucking gorgeous, always, but asleep like this, she was stunning.
Inhaling, she stirred, but she didn’t open her eyes. “I smell french fries.”
Grabbing the bag off the table and snatching a fry, I held it to her lips. “Open.”
She opened her clear blue eyes, but not her mouth.
“Eat,” I commanded.
She studied me as if looking at me for the first time. “You like to tell me what to do.”
I didn’t deny it. “You like to challenge me.”
“Not all the time.” She ate the french fry. “Shit, that’s good.”
I grabbed the carrier with the drinks and leaned back against the headboard. “Chocolate, vanilla, or strawberry?”
She looked at the drinks on my lap. “What’s the fourth one?”
“Diet Coke.”
She smiled. “Kinda ridiculous, don’t you think?”
I didn’t drink sugared shit. “Pick a fucking milkshake, woman.”
She snatched the chocolate one. “Did you really get all three flavors for me to choose?”
“Yeah.” But next time I’d get the fucking chocolate. I pulled the two large fries out and handed her one. “You still not eating meat?”
She did the cute little snort thing. “I was forced to eat chicken a few times or starve.” She took the lid off her shake and dipped a fry in it.
“How’d your stomach handle it?” Maybe that was why she’d hurled.
“By the third time, it wasn’t too bad.” She ate the nasty shake-drenched fry.
I took the chicken sandwich out of the bag and held it out to her. “I also got a burger with the works, minus the burger.” I pulled it out too.
She took the burger-less burger. “Thank you, but I think I’ll confine my culinary adventure to dairy overload today.”
I nodded and took my double burger out. We ate in silence and shared the diet soda. For the first time in ten days, I felt like I could fucking breathe. But as I sat there and ate food in a comfortable silence with this woman, I realized I hadn’t felt this kind of peace since before I’d enlisted. Hell, since before my mom died.
I never thought about finding a woman I fit with. But this blonde-haired strong-willed woman? She fucking fit. Lock and key, she more than fit.
And I liked it. A whole damn lot.
I watched with satisfaction as she polished off half the fries, some of the sandwich and most of the shake. Then she lay back down and put her head on my lap.
“Okay, that was more junk food than I’ve eaten in five years.” She rubbed her stomach and looked up at me. “What did you want to talk about?”
I set the soda on the nightstand and cut right to the chase. “I want you to take a pregnancy test.”
Her hand rubbing her stomach froze and her muscles tensed. “Why? Just because I vomited?”
“Yes.” And because I’d come inside her, and I couldn’t fucking stop thinking about it.
She laughed uncomfortably. “I’m not pregnant, Falcon.”
I brushed her hair off her face. “Then take the test.”
She sat up and pulled her knees to her chest. “What are you doing?”
I hesitated, trying to gauge the look of alarm on her face. “Do you want kids?”
Her hand went up and she scrambled back. “No. No, no, no. We are not having this conversation.” She got off the bed. “Don’t sit there and pretend like this is anything except you clearing your conscience by getting me to take a stupid test.” Her voice and her attitude ramped up, and she snatched the food wrappers off t
he bed and crushed them into a ball. “Well guess what? Mission accomplished. You found me, you fed me, you’re free of obligation, on every level. You can go now. No strings. Have a nice life.” She tossed the trash and walked into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.
I was off the bed before she had a chance to lock the door. I threw it open and was ready to let loose about her attitude and bullshit defenses, when I found her sitting on the edge of the tub, crying.
Goddamn it.
I picked her up.
“Hey,” she screeched. “Put me down!”
“No.” I strode back into the dump of a motel room and sat on the bed.
The second my ass hit the mattress, she was fighting to get off me. “Let me GO.”
I held her tighter. “No.”
Her fist hit my chest, and more tears fell. “I said, let me go.”
“Stop crying.”
She looked at me like I was fucking insane. “That’s the best you’ve got? Stop crying? Don’t ever tell a woman to stop crying! That’s not how you calm someone down. Don’t you know anything?”
There was something wrong with me, because I fought a smile. “I know you’re scared.”
She looked away, but she stilled. “Let me go, Falcon. I’m begging you.”
I put my lips to her ear and gave her the single thought I’d been fixated on since I sank inside her. “What if I don’t want to?”
A silent sob shook her shoulders. “Don’t do this to me.”
I grasped her chin and brought her face back to mine. “Would it be so bad if you were knocked up?” Everything about this was fucked. We didn’t know each other. She drove me fucking insane. But God help me, I wanted every inch of this challenging woman.
Her voice pitched high. “Are you crazy?”
Certifiable. “I’ll take care of you,” I promised.
“And a kid?” she asked, incredulous.
I didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
She stared at me for a long moment. “You’re serious.”
“Every word.” But I’d only said half of what I needed to say. “I want you to take that test, so we know what we’re dealing with, but I want something else first.”
