From beside me, I heard the sound of a phone ring, and then that damnable message again.
“Ed,” Charlie said, digging his elbow into my arm to get my attention. I wavered, torn between ignoring him and listening.
I sighed and forced myself to look at him.
“There are lots of reasons why her phone is disconnected. Don’t hurl yourself over the deep end until ye know why.” Charlie’s eyebrow kicked up, eyes wide, clinging to mine.
“Lots of reasons.” The words ripped out of me before I could call them back. They were angry words. Full of hate and menace. It didn’t even sound like me when I said them.
“Yes, arsehole… reasons. She might have needed to change her service provider, or maybe her phone broke. Maybe some wanker was calling her in the middle of the night to ask if her refrigerator was running and she got fed up,” Charlie hurled at me.
“She stopped calling me weeks ago, Charlie. Weeks. Now her phone is disconnected. What would you think if it were you in my place? What if she decided I wasn’t worth it? Or what if she thought it was easier to forget about me and move on? If I called her weeks ago, like I should have, would it have made a difference? What if I missed the chance? What if I blew it?” I shoved my hand through my hair, tugging hard enough to make my eyes water.
“I think until ye know for sure, then maybe ye should stop playing the ‘what if’ game. Besides, why haven’t you tried calling her before now?” Charlie jabbed me in the stomach with my phone.
I snatched it from him, stuffing it into my back pocket. “I was trying to let her come to me on her terms. She said she needed time!”
“Well, she’s had plenty of time, mate, so what are you going to do?” Charlie crossed his arms, rocking back on his heels, waiting for me to answer.
I stuffed my hands in my pockets and hunched my shoulders, wondering just how much more I could take before I snapped and crumbled. Why the hell does love have to be so fucking difficult? Why does it seem like you have to work so hard and break so much, just to be with the one you feel you can’t live without?
“I don’t know, Charlie,” I answered. I really didn’t know.
“Well, I’ll tell ye what yer going to do, at least for today. Ye’re going to dust yourself off, pick your head up, and ye’re going to live. We have a pub to run. And no matter how fucked up the situation is… ye’re going to be okay. I won’t give ye any other choice. And then, when tomorrow comes, ye’ll do the same. Over and over, until ye find out what’s really going on. Then… then ye’ll figure it all out. Not tonight, while ye’re only running on presumptions. Okay?” Charlie clasped my shoulder, shaking me to get my attention.
Taking one more deep breath in, and letting it go slowly, I raised my head, giving it a quick jerk. “Okay.”
Charlie let out a relieved sigh. “Good. Now let’s get the pub ready for a party.”
Violet darted off, disappearing somewhere in the back as I made my way around the bar and tied my apron around my waist. Each move brought me back to my surroundings. Back to reality. It sucked. I hated it. But Charlie was right. I couldn’t fall into a pit of despair when I had no idea what the hell was really going on.
I might not be able to get a hold of Hannah, but I could damn sure call Phillip. And that was exactly what I would do. I’d have my answers, even if they destroyed me in the process.
After about twenty minutes, there was nothing left to do to get ready. Charlie had gone back to his office, and Violet hadn’t come back to pester me like she normally did. She had an uncanny way of keeping me from sliding too far into my thoughts. She’d banter back and forth with me, or spit out a really awful joke. She kept me sane most days.
The first of the guests arrived, filling the pub with noise that only grew louder as more people showed up. Violet popped up out of nowhere. Her eyes, rimmed with pink, as if she’d been crying, were offset with a megawatt smile perched on her lips as she filled glasses and hurled insults across the bar.
Laughter rolled through the air, making it almost impossible to be in a bad mood. I let it go and tried to live in the moment. A happy moment with a happy couple. Toasts and cheers went up, shots went down, and somewhere in all the mix, someone started belting out a really bad rendition of Whitney Houston’s I Will Always Love You. Whoever it was got shut down really fast when the hissing and booing started, but only to be filled with boisterous laughter, and good-hearted insults.
I felt myself relax, laughing along with the jovial atmosphere, giving my own insulting good-natured jokes across the bar. And even though I didn’t want to think about it, it was still there in the back of my mind.
I was a man with half a heart, but I was still living.
A few hours later, the drinks slowed, and some of the party left with over-exuberant hugs and shouts following them out to the rain-soaked streets. My feet and back were killing me. I was ready for my bed and the ability to slip off into the land of dreamless sleep. I usually slept like the dead after working a big party, my mind and body too tired to come up with something close to a dream.
Those were the nights that brought me the most peace. Made it easier to wake up and keep moving forward. To keep waiting for when Hannah would reach out to me.
I leaned forward, arms stretched, palms flat against the bar rail, with my back arched to relieve the kinks, when the pub door opened with a gust of rain-scented wind. It blew in, slipping over my skin, refreshing me.
Turning my head toward it, I closed my eyes, letting it bathe my face. A tired sigh, something just shy of a yawn, worked itself up from deep inside as I pushed myself upright. My eyes felt heavy as I forced them open. Only one more hour before the pub closed and I could drag my ass to bed.
If only she’d call me. If only she would have talked about it with me instead of shutting down. Cutting me out of her life without a second thought. That was what killed me the most. She knew deep in her heart how she felt. Running from it—from me—made no sense, but, for whatever reason, she did it anyway. If she truly felt she was better off without me, I’d have no choice but to accept it.
“Hoy! Need a refill, mate,” a booming voice called out from down the bar. I grabbed the closest bottle and walked over to fill the shot glass.
“He’s had enough to fell a damn elephant. Where the hell is he putting it?” Violet asked, leaning in so only I could hear her.
I shook my head and handed her the bottle, saying, “His right leg, I suppose.”
“Have you heard the joke about the blonde in the wheat field?” she asked, grabbing a wet rag and wiping up the remains of a spilled drink.
Before I could tell her no, Charlie interrupted by jumping on the bar, glass raised. A goofy grin spread out on his lips. “Last toast of the night, and then you wankers need to go the hell home.”
A chorus of laughter broke free from those who were left as they bobbed and weaved, getting closer to the bar as he continued, “To my cousin Drew and his future wife… what the hell are ye thinkin’ marrying this arsehole anyway?” He broke off, laughing with everyone as those closest to Drew pounded on his back. Drew took it in stride and put his arm around Ally, giving her a searing kiss.
Hoots and cheers went up around them as Charlie tried to get his wayward toast back under control. “Hoy! Shut the hell up so I can finish the toast…” The group went a little quieter, waiting for Charlie to keep talking. “That’s more like it. Now, what was I saying? Oh! To Drew and Ally… may you have a happy life together. And may…”
Charlie stopped talking. Just cut himself right off and glanced toward the door like he’d seen a ghost. And then a smile lit up his face as he tipped his glass toward the front of the pub, saying, “To love, may it always come at the right time and the right place. Cheers!”
“Cheers!” everyone shouted back at him as he turned to me, tipped his glass, and then downed the contents. He jumped off the bar, landing right beside me. With his antics over, everyone shifted back to their seats. But Charlie jus
t stood there, beaming from ear to ear.
“What the hell’s gotten into you?” I asked.
Charlie dipped his head toward the front of the pub.
Time stopped. My heart quit beating.
I vaulted over the bar, sliding along the polished top. A barstool crashed to the floor. Napkins exploded into the air like confetti. But I didn’t care. Nothing was going to keep me from closing the distance between us.
A smile worked across her lips as I came to a skidding halt in front of her.
“A little dramatic, don’t you think?” Hannah asked, stormy eyes glittering like stars.
“Don’t care,” I said, cupping her face with my hands and resting my forehead against hers.
“Please tell me I’m not dreaming,” I whispered against the tightness of my throat.
Hannah placed her hand against my pounding heart. “You’re not dreaming.”
“Why didn’t you call? I’ve been waiting for ye to call me…” I winced, hearing the way my voice wavered.
She clenched my shirt, pulling herself closer to me. “I have so much I want to tell you.”
A heavy hand landed on my shoulder, squeezing. “Violet and I are getting ready to kick this lot out of here.”
Hannah swayed on her feet, blinking slowly as the sounds around us filtered back in. “I shouldn’t have bothered you at work.”
“Nonsense,” Charlie said, reaching down and picking up a bag by Hannah’s feet. “We’re glad ye’re here,” he continued, putting his arm over Hannah’s shoulder, leading her to the bar.
I fell in step behind them, a little outside of myself in some sort of euphoric bubble yet to be popped by reality.
Charlie helped Hannah onto a barstool. “Now, sit here, and Ed will go ‘round the other side and pour ye a drink whilst I get this lot cleared out.”
“But I…” Hannah protested as Charlie beamed at her, and then turned to me.
“Get her a drink, Ed. It’s clear as day she needs one.” He gave me a good-natured shove to get moving.
Across the bar from her, I was able to see what I’d missed earlier in my haste to hold her. Large, purple half-moons hung heavy under her grey, bloodshot eyes. She was tired. No, she was exhausted. And barely hanging on to boot.
Her chin found her hand, and she propped her head up on it with a deep sigh. A sleepy smile lifted the corners of her lips as she watched me watching her.
“I’d take a soda or something with a little sugar in it to help keep my eyes open,” Hannah said.
I busied myself getting her drink, wondering why in the hell I was standing on the opposite side of the bar when she was within arm’s reach. The ice hit the glass, the soda popping and fizzing out over my hand when Charlie crossed the room and bustled a handful of people out onto the street. The headlights of two cars beamed brightly as the drivers sat idly waiting for their drunken charges to climb in and close the doors behind them.
As I handed Hannah’s drink over to her, she caught my hand up in hers. “It’s really good to see you again, Ed.”
I swallowed hard.
“Violet, load what’s left of the glasses for washing, and, Ed, I need you in the back for a quick minute,” Charlie called out as he locked the doors to the pub, rattling them for good measure.
I followed Charlie to the back, but not before throwing a quick look over my shoulder in Hannah’s direction. A little of the tension left my shoulders when Violet said something to Hannah, making her laugh.
“You okay?” Charlie asked, snapping me out of my daze.
I was better than okay. I’d be even more so when Hannah and I had a chance to talk. “Ye called me back here to ask me that?”
Charlie sighed. “No, I called ye back here to point out something ye clearly missed.”
My eyebrows tugged together. “And what’s that, mate?”
“The bag she brought with her?” Charlie looked at me in question.
“What about it?” I asked, unsure where he was going with it.
“It’s not a very big bag, Ed,” Charlie hinted, wincing as if it hurt him to say it. “Look, I know ye’re probably not thinking straight right now. I can’t blame ye for it. Having her show up out of the blue has to be a bit of a shock, but what happens if she’s not staying?”
I screwed my face up at him. “Why wouldn’t she stay? And really, how can I answer anything when I haven’t even had a chance to talk to her? Ye saw to that yourself,” I answered, feeling a rolling sense of anger.
He’d pulled her right from my arms and done his best to put some distance between us.
“I did that so ye’d come back to the surface again. Ed, I’m not telling ye what to do here, but as a friend, can I ask ye to keep your head about this? Talk it out with her before ye’re blindsided again.”
I crossed my arms. What the hell was wrong with him? Shouldn’t he at least be happy for me? “I’m not sure I follow ye.”
Charlie rolled his eyes. “She only brought an overnight bag, Ed. Ask yourself what that means.”
“I don’t think Hannah’s gonna be able to keep her eyes open much longer,” Violet said as she poked her head around the corner.
Charlie’s words punched a hole in my gut. Why would Hannah only travel out of the country with an overnight bag?
“I’ll go start the car,” Charlie answered, ducking into his office and right back out again with a small bag hanging from his hand. He jostled it at me as if to say ‘see’.
The lights were doused at the front of the bar, masking the confusion on my face in the red glow of the exit sign of the back door as Violet led Hannah to where I stood rooted to the floor.
“Ready?” Violet asked, brushing past us.
Hannah wrapped her arm around my waist. “Can you give us just a minute?”
When the back door swung shut behind Violet, Hannah shifted nervously on her feet. “I didn’t get a chance to ask you earlier, but is it okay if I stay with you tonight?”
My heart swelled and then sank all in a single heartbeat. “Just tonight?”
She chuckled. “It’s a start. Right? Besides, I only have enough clothes for one night. The rest of my stuff is at Della’s.”
“Della’s? Hannah, why is the rest of your stuff at my aunt’s house?” I asked, unsure I heard her right.
Her hand shot up, covering a yawn that shook her from head to toe. “Because I didn’t want to haul two massive-ass suitcases around tonight.”
Two suitcases? “That’s a lot of stuff. How long are ye staying?”
She jerked back. “I’m too late. Aren’t I?”
“Too late for what?” I prodded, unsure what she meant.
“I should have called you. I didn’t because I was scared, and then my mom… I saw my dad, Ed. It’s such a long story. I know I owe you a huge explanation. Please, tell me I’m not too late. I know I said I needed time, but it was unfair of me to take so long. I had to get my shit together… I had to come to terms with everything, but then I couldn’t, so I tried burying everything under work and school. But I couldn’t bury you. You just kept popping up in my head no matter how hard I tried, you never left my thoughts… I was a mess. I’m still a mess…”
I silenced her with the kiss I’d been dying to give her since I’d first saw her when she arrived at the pub. Her lips trembled against mine when it ended.
Bringing my hand up, I cupped her face. “Hello, love. It took ye a while, but I’m glad ye’re here.”
She pressed her cheek into my hand. “I’m glad I’m here too.”
I kissed her forehead, and then tucked her into my side, leading her out to Charlie’s car.
Violet claimed the front seat, cracking one eye open when Hannah and I slid into the back. She gave me a sleepy smile as the car moved forward.
Charlie cleared his throat, my eyes catching his in the mirror as he glanced between Hannah and me. “So, Hannah, how long are you staying?”
Violet’s hand shot out, hitting him in the shoulder.
“Charlie!”
The car swerved. “Bloody hell, woman. Ye should know better than to hit the driver. And I only ask because I know Ed will want to take some time off while she’s here. Scheduling, ye know,” Charlie said, taking a firmer grip on the steering wheel.
Hannah sort of melted into my side as she turned her own questions on Charlie. “How long am I staying with Ed, or in the country?”
“Either, both,” Charlie fired back with a tired laugh.
Hannah reached for my hand, hooking her fingers through mine. “I packed up my entire life in two suitcases. Sold what I couldn’t bring, and then boarded a plane. I’m not going back.”
Hannah gripped my fingers tighter in hers as my heart hammered so hard against my chest that I swore it would burst. “You’re staying. For good?” I asked, wishing we were anywhere but the backseat of Charlie’s car so I could pull her in my arms and spin her round in circles like they did in the movies when that pivotal moment between two estranged lovers happened.
“I’m here for the long haul. I even have a job. Can you believe that?” She sounded as deliriously happy as I was.
The car slowed as Charlie pulled up alongside my building. Hearing Hannah say she planned to stay shut Charlie right up. Violet grinned a knowing sort of smile. Hannah must have already told her when Charlie asked to talk to me in the back.
Violet rolled her window down as Hannah and I got out of the car. “Here, don’t forget this,” she said, hoisting Hannah’s bag out the window.
I took it from her, ducking down to see inside the car to talk to Charlie. “Thanks for the lift, mate.”
He nodded. “Should I take you off the schedule tomorrow night?”
Hannah ducked down beside me, overhearing our conversation. “Yes. Please, but only one night.”
“Only one?” I joked.
She tipped her head and gave me a smug smile, making her eyes twinkle like the stretch of stars above us. “We have plenty of time now, Ed. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”
A jolt of need shot through me, flickering to a slow burn as her eyes blinked slowly. “I’ll call ye,” I told Charlie, taking Hannah’s hand in mine as I gave them a brief wave of my fingers.
Runaway Heart (A Game of Hearts #2) Page 25
