by Haley Jenner
Leaning my elbows on the kitchen bench I massage my scalp in a lame attempt to pull myself together. “Where the fuck are Janie and Jake?” I whisper to myself, as if they could save me from my humiliation.
“Jake headed to a mate’s place early this morning, something about a jam session.” Archer’s voice pulls me from my thoughts and I turn my head towards his voice. His green eyes are planted firmly on my ass, my position emulating his naughty Tinkerbelle ink; bent at the waist, ass in the air. I stand abruptly and his smile is wicked, just as I remember it and it causes a rather pleasant feeling south side of my waist.
His clothing does nothing to hide the definition of his physique, he may as well’ve just kept the towel. His muscular thighs are encased in dark denim, while the grey Henley decorating his chest, does nothing but emphasize the outline of his upper body. I’m caught staring once again and biting my lip to disguise my embarrassed smile, I make the decision to leave. “Right, well, welcome home. I think I’ll just go.”
I walk past Archer Dean and his smug grin with my head held high, trying to keep my dignity intact. I used to hate this man, made it clear in every encounter we ever had, yet I've eye-fucked him no less than 3 times in our short interaction. No wonder that stupid smug grin is firmly planted on that irritatingly beautiful face. I’ve made it down the front steps when his voice stops my retreat.
“Good to see you again Belle.” I can hear the smile in his tone and my feet falter slightly at the way he says my name. Making it feel as though it was whispered along my naked skin, causing my entire body shudder. I refuse to turn around and meet his eyes, flicking my hand over my head in a brief wave instead. I may sway my hips a little more than necessary as I make my way home and similar to so many times before, I feel his eyes burn into my back as I walk the short distance home. Only this time there’s no animosity, no familial obligation for him to do so. His stare feels heated and I fight my need to glance over before walking inside. A fight that I lose and hate myself for when his full lips tip up into a smirk as he offers a slight lift of his chin before disappearing back inside.
I slide down my front door, landing firmly on my ass as soon as I enter my house, wide-eyed and shell-shocked.
What. The fuck. Was that?
I've been attracted to many men before, but that was magnetic. It's not just because he was beautiful, because, my word, no other word could describe him. It was more, my body felt alive around him. Every nerve ending felt wired, pulsing under each and every last inch of skin covering my body. Even now, I can feel my heart beating in my throat, making my mouth dry. I've never had a feeling like this in my life. Ever. I wanted to touch him. Run my hands along the smooth planes of his skin, along every ridge of hard muscle. I wanted to feel his own steady heartbeat beneath my palms.
Arching uncomfortably, I fumble around in my jeans pocket, trying to retrieve my cell. Locating Jake’s number immediately, I dial and wait forever for him to answer. "Annabelle," he yells over the deafening sound levels in the background.
The music lightens as Jake moves away from the noise. "Annabelle?" he questions, confirming I'm still on the line.
"So…. your brothers back?"
"You’ve seen Archer? How good is it that he’s back? He was waiting when I got home from school yesterday. He seems good yeah? Don't you think?" he gushes, the happiness in his tone infectious.
"Yeah, baby, it’s really good. He seemed well, I mean I only saw him briefly, but he looked, ummm, well…I guess." I try for nonchalance.
"Hey, Annabelle, I've gotta head back to the guys. Come over this afternoon?" he invites distractedly.
"Oh, I don't want to intrude on your time with Archer, I'll just -" but he cuts me off.
"Don't be silly, you're family. I'll see you tonight for dinner. Love you," he ends the call before I can argue anymore.
“Yeah, back at ya,” I mumble into dead air dropping my phone and rubbing my hands along my face.
I'm distracted for the rest of the day. Work drags as I watch the clock, willing time to go faster. My mind constantly drifts to thoughts of tanned wet skin and naughty Tinkerbelle tattoos. I’m nervous to see him again, but in the same breath, I can’t wait. I feel buzzed with excitement, why, I wasn't sure. But I want the chance to look at him again. Hopefully with a little more subtlety this time around. My cheeks heat in recollection of our interaction this morning, I don’t actually think I could have been more obvious in my gawking if I’d tried. God knows what he thought of me, years ago I despised his very presence and this morning I was fantasizing about licking his entire body.
Repeatedly.
And he knew it.
Ugh! How humiliating.
I was looking forward to actually talking to him, really getting to know him. He seemed so different from our last encounter, granted our last conversation he was drowning in grief. I’m interested to see what time away has done for him.
Closing the shop, a little earlier than usual, I walk with no destination in mind and find myself sitting at the old Maple by the Chapel. I think of nothing, of everything. I remember sitting here with Archer, remembering the grief, the emptiness in his eyes. I remember how painful it was to see that level of hurt in him and at the time being afraid that he'd never find a way back. I'm thankful that he has, for Janie, for Jake. But most importantly, for him.
I know that Jake will be expecting me soon, so I slowly make my way home, wondering if Archer knows I’ll be at dinner. Would he care? Will he even be there? My heart deflates a little at the thought that he won’t.
I take my time getting ready. I have no idea why. Okay, I do. But I refuse to admit it to myself. I ponder what to wear for an eternity. I want to look comfortable, like I haven't given it a lot of thought, but I want to look good. It's ridiculous, I'm his brothers best friend, the little 'neighbor girl'. I'm certain he won't ever see me as anything more or even if I’m sure that’s what I’m aiming for. But I’m intensely attracted to him and it wouldn’t hurt if it was reciprocated. He was staring at my ass so I decide to capitalize on that. I settle on dark yoga pants with my uggs, a thin sweater that is too big, making it fall from my shoulder and my hair piled on top of my head. I look comfortable, relaxed, but good.
I walk into their house without knocking, anticipation thick in my veins. Reaching the kitchen, I scan the area and notice only Janie and Jake. I smile widely to hide my disappointment, my heart deflating at his absence.
"Hey, Annabelle," Jake greets as I walk over to him, leaning up to touch my lips to his.
"Hey, Jakey, Janie," I smile at Janie as we share a tight embrace.
"Hiya, baby girl," she replies, touching my cheek before moving back to the stove.
“You must be beside yourself?” I smile widely at her back.
“There are no words, I feel complete. For the first time in too many years to count, I feel complete,” she breathes, eyes glassing over with tears as she turns back towards me. I move in to hug her tightly once again, sharing in her happiness.
I see Janie and Jake almost every day, but I never tire of their affection. In fact, I crave it, constantly. I find it soothing; their touch, their love. They see me as family as much as I see them in the same way and I’m grateful for their existence in my life. Every single day. I’ve lost every blood relative I’ve had. But through that, I’ve never felt alone. Never for one single day, because of them.
Settling into our usual routine, I help Janie with dinner as Jake sets the table. I watch as he sets four places with a broad smile on his face, the dimple in his cheek, deep. My heart warms at the love that shines through him. Archer was a shitty brother for so long, completely unavailable to Jake. But I know that Jake won't ever use it against him, right now, all he feels is excitement that his older brother is back, giving him the opportunity to reconnect.
Jake Dean is special in so many ways and I love him completely. I'm not sure when our relationship morphed from me being his babysitter to a friendship, but I'm thankf
ul it did. Jake is my greatest friend. I have my girls, sure, but my friendship with Jake is different. He’s the family I never had, a constant in my life. People in town find it strange that I have such a strong connection with a boy a few years my junior, but I don't see him as a 16-year-old boy. We’re definitely equals. Jake is mature, wiser beyond his years. Our friendship has always been easy, there are no barriers, no walls, just us.
Jake catches me watching him and raises his eyebrows in question. I ignore his questioning stare, only winking before returning to my task.
Dinner prep finished, the three of us fall into our familiar pattern, chatting about our day, laughing at nothing. We spend an hour or so catching up, waiting on Archer. No-one mentions his absence, each of us refusing to acknowledge the possibility that Archer Dean hasn't changed. Jake checks his watch constantly and anger settles heavily in the pit of my stomach. If Archer thinks he can come home and treat this family, my family, like shit again he better be prepared for the consequences. These two people don’t deserve his poison and I won’t hesitate to let him know that if he looks to inject it into their lives once again.
"Maybe we should just eat, yeah? He's probably just caught up," Janie offers softly, sympathetic eyes watching Jake.
"No," Jake bursts out, a little too loudly and embarrassed by his outburst he calms his tone. "He'll be here, Ma. He promised."
Just as Jake finishes his sentence, the front door opens and we all turn to the entrance, eyes on Archer's approach. Noticing our collective stare his steps falter slightly. "Sorry I'm late, had to pick up dessert," he offers cautiously eyes flicking between the three of us.
I can't contain the wide grin that spreads across my face as Jake's shoulders relax under my arms. Archer takes in our positioning, me sitting on the bench with Jake standing between my legs, back to my chest as I rest my arms over his shoulders. His brow furrows slightly in confusion, unsure of what to think and I drop my head to hide my amusement. Call me strange but I love this part, the confusion. Jake and I are affectionate and while our relationship is completely platonic, most people can’t help but make more out of it than there is. I see it as their problem, I love Jake, as he does me and I don't care for the judgement of others.
Archer watches my smile uncertainly, before continuing, "I went to North Bend to grab Apple Pie. Bakery there that does it best. Your favorite right, Belle?" his eyes stay focused on me as I'm stunned into silence.
Archer Dean went to North Bend. To get Apple Pie. For me?! I blink a few times, unable to form a sentence and my silence makes him uncomfortable. "Ma used to buy Apple Pie for your birthday instead of cake, cos' you prefer it yeah?" he clears his throat, suddenly unsure of himself and I can only nod in response.
Jake's voice breaks through my deliberation, his tone questioning. "You drove to North Bend and back to buy Apple Pie. For Annabelle?"
Archer almost squirms under the scrutiny. "Not a big deal kid, my favorite as well. Anyway, it's not that far," he concludes, clearly finished with the topic at hand.
Janie snaps us all from the uncomfortable atmosphere, clapping her hands together. "Everyone sit, I'll dish up," she instructs and we all move to take a seat, Archer choosing to sit directly across from me, Janie and Jake at each end of the table.
We eat in silence for a short time before Archer attempts to break the awkwardness. "Belle, how's your Gran?" he asks and I hear the sharp intake of breath from both Janie and Jake as Archer’s eyes flick between them in alarm.
I rub the back of my neck, feeling bad for the guy. "Gran passed a few years back," I answer on a soft smile. His face falls and I can tell he’s internally kicking himself. "It's fine, Archer, honestly. You didn't know," I soothe, attempting to reassure him.
"I'm sorry to hear that. She was a good lady," he offers and I nod in acknowledgement at his words.
Awkward silence falls across the table again as we all pick at our food. "Is dinner usually this awkward or is just because I'm here?" Archer asks.
"It's just because you're here," I mask my joke with a vacant expression, keeping eye contact.
Jake laughs first, Janie and I soon after. Archer smiles widely, appreciating my teasing as he relaxes slightly. The awkward atmosphere dissipates from then, conversation flowing. Jake talks mostly, telling us about the band and the gigs they’ve managed to book. I watch Archer as he takes in every word Jake speaks, 100% invested in what he has to say, wanting to know everything he can about his younger brother.
He must feel my stare because every so often he turns his eyes to me and we watch each other candidly. I observe him as his eyes casually fall to my shoulder, where my sweater has dropped and he slowly scans my collarbone up towards my face and I feel the blush rising up my neck.
Archer’s face is a perfect mask; one I’ve never been able to read. This makes me slightly uncomfortable, making me the one to look away first.
We eat dessert, my apple pie and I suddenly feel shy under his assessment. He watches me as I eat, his focus on my lips. The green of his eyes darken as his eyes settle on my mouth and I feel hot. Flushed to a point I stop eating. "Not good?" he questions and my voice cracks slightly as I answer.
"Very good. Just full from dinner," I smile stiffly through my lie.
I offer to clean up, a calculated move to leave the confines of the table. Jake helps clear the table before making his escape to watch TV and I'm grateful for the reprieve, for the space.
Archer is intense. I've never in my life, been so turned on by someone, especially from just a look. At least I now know how it feels to be eye-fucked by a stranger, he’s most definitely repaying the favor from this morning. I, at least, had the decency to do it when we were alone with no curious eyes. Asshole.
I don't know how to act or how to feel about my reaction to him. It’s confusing to me and makes me nervous as all hell.
I busy myself with cleaning, trying to rid my mind of thoughts of Archer Dean and how he makes me feel. I finish the last of the dishes when I feel him enter the kitchen. My back is to the entryway, but I know it's him. He doesn't speak, doesn't move, but I can feel his presence in the room as he watches me. I can sense his eyes consuming me from behind and unable to take it any longer I turn around fast, catching his eyes focused on where my ass was moments before. Slowly, his eyes scan upwards landing on my chest, his tongue peeking out to moisten his lips as he stares. But he isn't just staring, he's taking in their shape, their heaviness and my nipples harden at the attention. The thin material of my sweater does nothing to hide this and he takes in a deep breath before dragging his gaze along my collar bone up my neck, once again, resting on my lips for a few beats before meeting my eyes.
Swallowing deeply before I speak, the thickness in my voice is obvious. "I had the decency to apologize when I was caught this morning," I challenge.
Archer smiles wickedly, eyes dropping to the teeth biting into my lip. "Wasn't tryin' to hide it and I’m not really one to apologize, Belle Baby."
My knees feel weak. I need to sit down before I fall. I used to hate him calling me that when I was younger, he used to say it with such venom. Now it rolls of his tongue and I can feel it stroke along the entire length of my body. Pulling my bottom lip between my teeth I attempt to hide my smile and I hear him groan softly, it's almost inaudible, but I hear it and my sex tightens in response. I need to leave, like now. "Well, nice to see you again, Arch. Thanks for dessert," I smile tightly before brushing past him.
"What's with you and Jake?" his question hits my back, stopping my exit. I turn slightly so I can see his face, my brows rising in question. “You seem…. close," he baits.
"We are," I reply, watching him cautiously.
"You that close with a lot of guys?" he emphasizes his words, pissing me off, our heated conversation now forgotten.
My arms instinctively cross against my chest, irritation clear in my tone as I respond. "Nope, just Jake."
Archer watches for me a beat or two, assessing my posture
. "Bit young for you, don't you think?" His voice is hard, the venom I'm so used to returning.
I laugh sarcastically. "Wow…. Jake is my best friend. Feel free to assume what you will, your judgement is nothing I’m not used to from other small minded people. I won’t explain our relationship to anyone, not even you," I finish icily before walking from the room.
I find Jake and Janie watching TV together. "Guys, I'm out, thanks for dinner." Janie blows me a kiss and focuses back on the TV, but Jake gets up to embrace me tightly. I feel Archer watching us as Jake leans down to briefly touch his lips to mine before promising to call me the next day. I see his furrowed brow as I walk past him to the door, our kiss only adding to his confusion. His footsteps echo behind me as I make my way down the porch steps, his eyes burning into my back as I walk home. I refuse to meet his eyes when I make it to my door and I walk inside, disappointed in his judgement.
Chapter Five
Archer
I welcome the hot water on my tense muscles, dropping my head to let the water of the shower massage my neck. I slept like shit, waking early. This isn’t unusual, but it wasn’t familiar nightmares infiltrating my sleep, this time my dreams were filled with thick brown hair, creamy skin and pink pouty lips. Not that I’m complaining. I’d take thoughts of bare collarbones and heavy tits over the shit I’m used to any day.
I feel like a dick. Correction, I am a dick, or at least I acted like a dick. Belle was offended by my questions, by my curiosity. Granted, I wasn’t exactly friendly in my approach, but their relationship confuses me. Last time I was home, they were close, always a bit touchy but I assumed they’d grow out of it. Shit, Jake’s 16 now, surely she realizes she’s giving him the wrong idea. Tell me a 16-year-old kid doesn’t read more into their behavior. Belle's a grown ass woman, she should know better. I’d like to pretend that my irritation at their connection is me looking out for Jake, but in reality, I’m just pissed because I want her, or at least, want inside her.
