by Mj Fields
I thought about what to say cause I knew what I wanted to and there was no fucking way I was gonna let that happen. Not until we were both ready.
“Do me a favor?”
“Sure Xavier.”
“Understand that intimacy is built by exposing our wounds, making them vulnerable. And remember you’re not the only one who feels like they drank the Kool Aid. This is all new to me. I’ve never felt this way either. You aren’t the only one who feels exposed.”
“You’re sure?”
“One hundred percent sure.”
“Okay. Promise me something too?”
“Anything.”
“That when you get sick of me you’ll just tell me. Just don’t; I don’t even know if I could call it cheating. I don’t even know what we’re doing.”
“We’re doing us Taelyn. I promise you as long as you promise the same.” I squeezed her hand. “You trust me?”
“Oddly I do. And how stupid is that. Aren’t I supposed to be bitter and out whoring around or something?”
“You can be my whore any day of the week. Every day of the week.”
She smiled and held my hand to her chest and kissed my hand.
“Can you take me home?”
“One stop.”
“Okay.”
My phone rang and I hit answer. “Xavier Steel.”
“We doing a roll call?”
“Cyrus, what’s up man?”
“I know you’ve been planning this thing for Tara but I need to take over.”
“Okay. Why? What’s up?”
“I want it to be about her. She’s not hotels and fancy dinners. She’s not roses and bullshit Xavier. She’s just-- love.”
“What does that mean?”
“Xavier, please tell me that shit wasn’t on speaker.”
“Sorry man when you’re gonna channel your inner vagina maybe you should warn me.”
“Be nice,” Taelyn smacked me.
“Ouch damn it.” I laughed.
“Hi Cyrus, I’m Taelyn.”
“I’m not a pussy.”
She laughed. “Tara is a lucky girl.”
“I have a huge dick.”
“Wow, okay that’s great.” She gave a nervous chuckle.
“It’s genetic, she knows that very well don’t ya Irish?”
“Are all of you all pierced up too?” She asked Cyrus.
“Fuck X, she’s dick talking to another dude.” Cyrus chuckled.
“I did that because you were worried about me hearing you acting like you had a vagina. Just trying to make you comfortable.” She was quick as hell with the come backs. Hot! I think.
We pulled up in front of the store. “Cyrus talk to Taelyn, I gotta grab something.”
“What would make it the perfect day for her Cyrus? If she could have anything, what would she want?”
“Kiss?” I leaned over and gave her a loud kiss on the cheek. “Blow job?”
“Speaker phone X. Come on man I don’t need to hear that shit.”
I laughed, “She’s amazing.”
~
I ran into the store and looked around.
“Can I help you?”
“Yeah, I need a purse or bag, the kind that’s strap crosses between tits and shits on the hip.”
She smirked, “Xavier Steel?”
“Yeah. Can we make this quick?”
“Sure thing,” she smiled, “Right this way.”
I followed her well aware that the sway in her ass was exaggerated for my pleasure. But that shit did nothing for me. I saw them and walked around her. I grabbed a black one that was kind of like the one she had and a brown one. Then I saw pink, which reminded me of her blushing. I grabbed it too. I was gonna make her walk around it in naked.
She rang me up and asked why three.
I just winked at her and walked out the door.
When I got in the car Cyrus and Taelyn where still talking.
“Birds?”
“Yeah lots of them.” Cyrus answered her.
“Flowers?”
“Not a lot, just for her.”
“Her dress?”
“I was thinking a couple days before the wedding she and the girls could go grab something. You can go too.”
“Thanks but its family. If that’s what’s important to her it should all be about that.”
“If X still has you around after this long. I can assume--.”
“Anything else Cyrus?”
He laughed. “Nah, your girls got it all under control. You done with Falcon yet?”
“Soon why?”
“I need some shit done in Terrytown like yesterday.”
“Why’s that? I won’t be at your place.”
“Taelyn will let you know. Thanks girl. I think you’re my favorite out of my brother’s rides.”
“Thank you I guess?” she laughed. “But we’re --.”
She stopped and looked at me.
“We’re us. Not like you freaks. Safe travels bro; see you in a couple days.”
I looked over at Taelyn writing down notes in a little notebook.
“You take on another job?”
“Just helping out that’s all.”
“I got ya something” I handed her the bag and she shook her head no. “You’ll like it.”
She looked in the bag and we pulled back onto Madison Avenue.
“Xavier I don’t know what to say. Thank you. But it’s too much. Mine was like thirty bucks and why three?”
“Black and brown go with everything right?”
“Like you have to ask me GQ. So why pink?”
I could lie but I knew by saying it she’d turn pink. “That matches your cheeks when you get embarrassed, and then sometimes pissy. It makes me hard.”
She shoved my arm. “Not funny.”
“It’s truth.”
“I love them, thank you. Which one do I use first?”
“Pink. Definitely pink.”
“But--.”
“No buts. I’m gonna fuck you in the bath and in the shower. I won’t go without Irish. I’m also gonna fuck you on the weekends.”
“Awe that’s so sweet?” She laughed. “You’re a nice guy you know. Just like your brother--.”
“I’m not a nice guy and I’m not a pussy like my brothers.”
She laughed. “Of course you’re not. You’re an asshole.”
“Remember that.” I reached down and played with my tunes until I found the one I wanted to play for her. “This song Irish--.”
“Don’t tell me it’s ours?”
“It’s reminds me of tonight,” I winked at her.
Blurred Lines by Robin Thicke played and she laughed.
I loved her laugh. I loved a lot of things about this girl. She was way too far in.
When we got close to home she was holding her waist.
“Cramps?” I squeezed her hand.
“You are a little too interested in my period. It’s weird.”
“It’s your pussy, of course I’m interested.”
She closed her eyes and leaned back in the seat and I rubbed her tummy.
“You want me to stop and grab some Pamprin or Midol Irish?”
“For God sake Xavier.” She half laughed, half scolded me.
“I just wanna help you feel good. Instead of saying for God’s sake Xavier. It should be Oh God Xavier!”
“I love how you think of me in my time of need.”
“Well that’s just the kind of guy I am Taelyn, I’m a giver.”
She smiled as she sunk further in the seat. “I do need to stop at the store though. I need tampons and pads.”
I cringed, “Both?”
“Yeah and could you hurry it hurts. I need Motrin too.”
Irish was bleeding from her vag and in pain.
“I’m gonna kiss it better when we get back.”
She tried to laugh but she held her stomach tighter.
As instructed James pulled in the convenient store and she sat up and whimpered.
“That bad?”
“Uh huh.” She bent to grab her wallet out of her pretty pink bag and the pain in her face killed me.
“What do you need?”
“Just Motrin, regular sized Tampax and maxi pads with wings.”
“Sit still.” I got out of the vehicle and walked in the store on a mission to make the pussy I was obsessed with feel better.
I walked right up to the feminine hygiene section and grabbed what she said to. Regular Tampax looked ghetto compared to those pearl ones. Irish liked pretty things. I was getting her the pretty ones.
I marched up to the counter owning this shit. Sort of. Fuck this was embarrassing. I was buying menstrual supplies. But I was doing it for her, and her pussy. My pussy. My pussy needed caring for and I was gonna be the only one caring for it. Suck it up man, I told myself.
The teenage clerk looked at me and I swear he was trying not to laugh.
“Do you think this shit’s for me?” I snapped at his smug little ass.
“I certainly hope not,” he laughed.
“Laugh it up dip-shit. Someday you’ll be done beating off in the shower and know what a pussy feels like. Of course that’ll happen after your balls drop and you’ve figured out that pleasing someone else is as good a feeling as getting off.”
“My balls dropped a few years ago. I don’t have to beat off and I get plenty of pussy.”
Smug little fuck, “I’m sure that blue and red smock gets them all hot and bothered.”
“No probably not but my brothers in a band. I get his cast offs and for an eighteen year old, that’s not all that bad. Here’s your change man have fun with your old lady.”
I wanted to climb over the counter and wipe that smug look off his face. Son of a bitch.
“She’s not old.”
I walked out with my dick between my legs and a bag full of rags. I guess I showed him. Fucker.
I looked at the vehicle and she was on the phone. She looked upset. I opened the door and she was yelling at someone. I looked at her and she looked away and continued her conversation with I assumed her brothers or her mom.
Chapter 22
47474
“Mom, Xavier is back.” I needed this conversation to end. “I know and I appreciate it but I’m not going to concern myself with how they feel about it.” Dear God this was embarrassing. “It’s my life, my choices. Why is him hugging a girl in a vehicle worse than me kissing that Nickie guy? I’m just as much at fault. I did it because he made me mad. Please I don’t want to go into it.” I listened to her and felt his eyes burning a hole in my head. “I don’t know why he hugged her. Why are we discussing a timeline here I--.”
“She was crying. Said her family was losing everything and that she was in love with Dr. Dickless and that he didn’t feel the same. Two weeks ago that shit would have meant nothing. I was drunk. She tried to kiss me--.”
“She what!”
“I told her that shit wasn’t gonna happen ever again, don’t get mad.”
“Mom, I’ll call you back.-- I love you too.”
I ended the call and looked at him.
“Say something Taelyn.”
“I wanna go to sleep. I’m tired.”
“I got your girl stuff.” He held up the bag and smiled.
“Yeah thanks.”
“Thanks?” He laughed as we pulled out of the parking lot.
“I would have got them. I’m really fine.”
“You owe me big. I almost kicked the little fucker’s ass in there who was laughing at me. Did I mention I hate kids?”
“Did you kiss her back?”
“No.”
“No, that’s all you’re going to say?”
“No I didn’t kiss her back.”
“So did she try to kiss you or did she kiss you?”
“She caught my cheek. That’s it. Be pissed all you want. Last night was pretty fucked up you know? I was sexually assaulted by two women.”
“Sexually assaulted?”
“Yep. You should be feeling sorry for me.”
“Pfft.”
“They kissed me. I wanted nothing to do with them. You, on the other hand, kissed Nickie like you--.”
“I was pissed at you!”
“Now that’s a shocker.” He reached over and grabbed my hand and I started to pull away. “I’m playing. We gonna keep going backwards or keep walking forward Irish?”
“Forward.”
“Good. So your family saw the pictures?”
“Yes and apparently they want me to come home.”
“You said no of course.”
“I said I’d come home for break.”
He didn’t say anything except, “Hmm.”
We pulled up to a building that looked exactly like all the others in the gated community. It was a little bigger and there were no signs of a neighbor.
“You’re home.” He said as he opened the door.
“How much is the rent?”
“It’s owned by Steel, you’re all good as long as you work for them.”
“Wrong answer. I want a number.”
“Okay nine and a half.” He grinned.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You in a better mood?”
“Why?”
“Well nine and a half inches in your mouth every day, that’ll take care of the rent.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Let’s go inside.”
He got out of the car and I sat and watched him. I swear he could ask anything of me, do anything to me, and I would let him. I was wide open to this man. My feelings for him were not rational. But I didn’t care. I was going to enjoy whatever time we had together and push away the fear of him hurting me like Daniel had.
I got out and he smiled and grabbed my hand. “You ready?”
“Yep.” I looked up at him and for a moment I was lost in his seemingly vulnerable smile.
“You forgot your girl things.”
“Oh, yeah about that. I really didn’t need them.”
“You’re kidding right?” His eyebrow shot up.
“You were hassling Cyrus and--.”
He grabbed me and bent me forward and swatted my ass.
“Ouch!”
“You deserve far worse.” He picked me up from behind and carried me to the front door.
He punched in the code on the digital lock and opened the door. “Four, seven, four, seven, four. Got it?”
“Not really.”
He walked in the door and kicked it shut and then set my feet on the floor.
“Irish. That’s the code. Four, seven, four, seven, four.”
He pointed to the left, “Coat closet.”
He opened the door and shrugged off his coat and hung it up. He held out his hand and I took my coat off and handed it to him.
I looked in as he hung my coat. All my shoes were inside. I kicked off my boots and so did he.
When he turned around I looked up into his eyes. His eyes were nearly black and slightly hooded.
My mouth went dry and I swallowed hard and closed my eyes, willing myself to turn away.
“You okay?” The thickness in his voice made my insides clench.
“Show me around?”
“There isn’t a lot to show, I wanted you to pick out some things for your place. I want it to feel like home to you. I kind of want you to like it here.”
“I already do.”
I felt emotions well up inside of me. I needed a few minutes, maybe a few days to get it all in check. I looked up briefly and he was looking at me.
“You gonna keep looking at me li
ke that or are you gonna say what’s on your mind?”
He stepped back a little and I forced a smile. “Just tired.”
“Okay. Your bedroom is upstairs, first door on the right. I’ll show you. You need sleep.”
I nodded.
We walked through the rooms and I didn’t even look. I just followed behind him and up the stairs. He opened the door to a very large, very pink room.
He pointed to the far left, “Bathroom’s there. Closet is next to it.”
If I said something I was going to cry. He looked back at me, his handsome face was unreadable.
“I’m gonna let you settle in then. You need anything call me. I’m heading over to Steel. Its three blocks away. So if there is anything--.”
I practically threw myself at him and wrapped my arms around his waist.
“Christ Taelyn, you’re a fucking wreck.” He walked us to the bed and pulled down the duvet cover. “Climb on up and lay down.”
I did and I swear even the hotel room bed wasn’t as comfortable as this bed. The sheets were slate gray silk and a hot pink cotton duvet covered what I assumed was a down comforter. It was heavy and extremely comfortable.
He covered me up and kissed me very cautiously on the lips and then my forehead.
“I don’t know how long it will take but again, you need anything you call. You want me here tonight or--.”
“Yes.”
He let out a sigh, “Thank fuck. I thought I fucked up already.”
“No. It’s a lot.”
“I’m not moving in, I’ve got my own place okay?”
I nodded unwilling to let myself tell him I would be fine with it. I wanted this to be his way. A man like him needed that. He needed to force his way into something in order to own it. I knew it to be true. Right now, I wanted nothing more than to be owned by him.
“You look exactly like I imagined you would laying there Taelyn. Stunning and more desirable than anyone else I have ever met.”
He kissed me again and walked out the door.
