Matt helped carry Grayden to the car and volunteered to go. I followed, hoping to help more, glad the messiest part had been taken care of already.
“No,” Dad said. “We need you two to stay here and keep things under control. How about you start a fire and roast marshmallows? Then get everyone to bed. We probably won’t be back until well after midnight.”
Mom and Dad pulled away and Matt and I were alone. He put his hand on my shoulder.
“Thanks for your help,” he said. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”
I looked at him, nearly getting lost in his eyes. I couldn’t find my voice, so I just nodded. Dragging my eyes from his, I kept reminding myself of my decision not to have a crush on him. He walked inside, then out back to the fire pit, and I followed.
Matt lit the fire while everyone else gathered supplies—hot dogs, makings for s’mores, drinks, napkins, and roasting sticks. I hovered around Matt, still wanting to help wherever I could. Molly finally joined us, her makeup perfect again. Then she insisted that Matt and I get our guitars. We looked at each other—neither of us was in the mood to play. But we did ask she asked.
She had us sit on either side of her. Matt didn’t know any good campfire songs, but once I got started, he was able to join in, making things sound more complete. After several rounds of requests, I finally decided it was my turn to pick a song, and I chose one of the first I’d learned—Dust in the Wind. Everyone was quiet for a while—that song usually settles people down.
By the end of the song, the coals were hot enough, and we pulled out the roasting sticks. I was busy assisting one of my little cousins when I noticed Cale ask Matt for help. I smiled, watching the two of them, and something akin to affection swelled in my chest. Matt was such a good guy, and he might have saved my brother’s life. I know that sounds dramatic, but with the hospital being so far away, the chances of bleeding to death were a lot higher. I would’ve only thought to clean and apply pressure, not use super glue.
Matt played some silly marshmallow-eating game with Cale, making him laugh hysterically. Then he helped Cale load his stick up and showed him exactly where in the fire to put it so the marshmallows would cook, but not catch fire. Him helping Cale was the neatest thing I’d ever seen.
“Matt,” Molly said, her tone more whiny than usual. “Come on. Cale’s fine on his own. Help me with mine.”
I rolled my eyes and thought I saw Matt do the same. Any normal girl would’ve loved to see her boyfriend treat her little brother like that. But Molly wasn’t normal. She disliked anything that took attention from herself.
With a sigh, Matt turned to Molly instead.
Matt wanted to stay up and wait for Grayden to come home. I thought that was really sweet. Molly figured it would be an excellent chance to make out, but she quickly learned Matt wasn’t in the mood. He invited me to wait up with them. She fell asleep soon after we’d settled on the couches in the living room and Matt and I were basically alone. Molly’s head was on a pillow in Matt’s lap and he stroked her hair, watching her.
“She sure is pretty,” he said. Then he grinned. “And she knows it.”
I nodded. I didn’t want to talk about how attractive my sister was—she talked about it enough.
“Where’d you learn all that medical stuff?” I asked.
“Scouting.”
I raised my eyebrows in surprise. “Really?”
“Yeah, I’m an Eagle Scout.”
“That’s impressive.”
He waved me off and smiled. “Not as impressive as you sticking around instead of running off to puke.”
I laughed quietly. “Yeah, Molly has a really weak stomach. So did I at one point, but it went away when I took my first-aid classes.” He’d called me impressive!
He nodded.
We sat in silence. I texted Mom, asking how Grayden was. She replied immediately. They were almost back.
When Dad pulled up the drive, Matt gently moved Molly to the side, and he and I ran out to meet them. We helped them get Grayden out of the car, then we all went inside. Dad carried Grayden to his room while the rest of us waited in the living room where Molly was just waking up.
“Is he okay?” Molly asked, rubbing her eyes.
Mom nodded. “The doctor said he’ll be fine.”
Molly breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh, good.”
Dad came up from downstairs. “Grayden just needs rest now.” He ran his hand through his hair, then put his arms around Mom. “He got twelve stitches, a blood transfusion, and a few shots to prevent infection.” He nodded at Matt. “Thank you so much for your quick thinking.”
Matt blushed and looked at his feet. Cute! He motioned to me. “She helped a lot.”
Dad smiled. “I’m not surprised. Samara’s always been one to keep her head.” He sighed. “All right, let’s get some rest.”
***
The next day, we went on another hike. This time, our parents accompanied us, so Molly and Matt weren’t nearly as mushy as last time. Grayden stayed home with my aunt, watching movies.
When we got back, I sat on my floor and messed around on my guitar. I’d only been playing for maybe ten minutes when Matt knocked and asked if he could join me.
“I guess so,” I said. “Though I think we’re ready—it’s only a family talent show.”
“Yeah, but there’s nothing wrong with being extra prepared.”
He sat next to me on the floor and we played through Hold On a few times. Having him near me was intoxicating. And it wasn’t just the physical attraction, though that was strong—I had to work hard not to reach out and touch his shoulder or arm. His personality, the way he treated my brothers, the way he acted toward my parents, all of it . . . He was so, so incredible.
I realized then and there that I was in serious trouble.
No! This couldn’t be happening! I wasn’t supposed to be crushing on him anymore. What happened to self-discipline? What happened to being able to control my emotions?
If Matt hadn’t been with me, I would’ve grumbled really loudly, or screamed into my pillow or something. Thank goodness he didn’t seem to notice my turmoil. He was pretty clueless about my situation, which was both a blessing and a bit disappointing.
My attempts to move on had been useless. Futile. What was I to do now?
And suddenly it occurred to me why I’d been unsuccessful at getting over him. I hadn’t told anyone what I was going through. I’m a verbal thinker—I can’t figure things out unless I talk my way through them. And speaking out loud to myself didn’t work. I’d never not discussed a problem I was going through with someone. Usually, I told Mom or Molly or sometimes even Dad. But my parents had been too busy since we’d gotten here, and Molly would freak out if she found out.
I puzzled over things, thought through my dilemma, and frustrated myself for the rest of the day. Cale and Grayden tried to get me to talk during dinner, but I just wasn’t in to the conversations.
After we finished eating, I grabbed my book and went outside to be alone. I found my way to the nature trails that wound their way through the bushes near the cabin and sat on a secluded bench and started reading. My mind kept drifting, though, and after thirty minutes of trying to force myself to concentrate, I finally gave up and put my book down. I really needed to find someone to talk to or else I’d never get any peace.
Then it hit me. Matt was the cause of my problems, and I’d never fully explained myself to him. My weird behavior, having a crush on him before knowing who he really was. The crazy thought occurred to me that I’d never fix the problems in my heart and mind unless I told him what was going on.
I had to confront him.
Whoa. That seriously didn’t sound like a good idea.
Yet . . . somewhere inside me, I realized things wouldn’t get better until I’d done it.
I didn’t want to give myself the opportunity to chicken out, so I jumped to my feet and strode down the path, intending to find him right then. Pull him
away from Molly, if need be. I rounded the bush and ran smack dab into—guess who? Yup. Matt.
“Sammy,” he said with some relief. “I was just looking for you. Molly’s on the phone with someone—has been for half an hour at least—and giggling, and . . . and I wanted to ask if I should be worried.”
“Oh, really? I’m sorry.” What he’d just said barely sank in. I was about to lose my nerve—I couldn’t allow him to distract me from what I’d set out to do. “I was looking for you too, Matt.” I motioned to the bench.
He hesitated, sitting down. “You were?”
“Yes.” I rushed on, pacing in front of him. “I wanted to tell you what’s going on right now with me. Well, what’s been going on the last few days, actually.” I took a deep breath. “You’re smart, you know music, you’re very good on the guitar, you’re practically Superman to my parents after yesterday with Grayden. Also, yes—you have to know it already—you’re pretty hot.”
His mouth popped open. I didn’t care. I kept going. “And I’m telling you all this so you know why I’m going to ignore you. I have to, for my own sanity. I’m moving on, Matt. I’ll no longer be under your spell.”
He tried to keep a straight face, but a chuckle broke through. “Spell?”
I didn’t care if I looked and sounded like an idiot. This felt so good, and it was such a relief to get it out in the open. I kept going.
“Furthermore, Matt. I’m not going to think about you at all anymore. Not even when we’re playing guitar together. Even when you’re talking to me and I’m talking back, I won’t be thinking about you.”
“Uh . . . how are you going to do that?”
I sat next to him. “I don’t know, but I’m going to completely remove you from my consciousness and even my subconsciousness.”
This time he really did laugh. “Subconsciousness? Is that even a word?”
“Of course it is. I just said it, didn’t I?” I sensed a flush burning across my face. No matter—I felt better already.
He laughed even harder. “But what about the talent show?” he choked out, wiping his eyes. “How will we play if you’re not thinking about me? We won’t be able to stay together.”
“Yeah, but—”
I stopped talking when I heard voices coming toward us. Dang it.
No way on earth was I about to get caught alone and practically in the bushes with my sister’s boyfriend. “Hide!” I hissed at Matt.
“Why?”
I jumped up and burrowed into the shrubbery behind the bench as fast and as far as I could. I groaned when Matt joined me. “Not here—somewhere else.”
“Shhh,” he hissed. “They’re coming.”
We were at least ten feet into the growth. Was it far enough? “You’re sure they can’t see you?”
“Positive,” he whispered.
The footsteps got louder. “Oh, honey, I know,” my mom said. “It’s been a long, hard week.”
“Samara’s had a difficult week too,” my dad said.
I felt my stomach twist—my parents were about to have a discussion about me. Great! To my horror, they stopped near the bench where we’d just been sitting.
“I think she’s got a crush on Matt,” Dad said.
I put my face in my hands.
“I’ve been wondering the same thing,” Mom said. “Every time I see her, she’s stealing glances at him. Poor girl.”
I looked up in shock. No more! No more! Please, oh, please just leave!
“He is an excellent young man. She couldn’t do much better.”
“But he’s dating Molly, and we all know how possessive that girl is.” Mom sighed. “What can we do to help Sam get over him? I hate it when my children get hurt.”
“Oh, she’s a tough girl. She’s not going to get upset over this—she’ll move on quickly enough.”
I nodded to myself. Let Matt hear that—I’d be over him in a split second.
“But what about last time?”
Dad shrugged. “There’s always that.”
Matt looked at me, a quizzical expression on his face. I ignored him, trying to keep my eyes on my parents. Please, please don’t say anything more.
Someone must’ve heard my pleas because Dad turned to the bench.
“Speaking of Samara,” he said, “look. She left her book here.” He picked it up.
“Silly girl. She must be around here somewhere.”
Dad sat down and motioned to the spot next to him. “Shall we?”
I groaned the longest silent groan ever. My dad’s voice had just taken on his “I’m about to woo my wife” tone.
Mom giggled. “Scott! She might be back any second now.”
“Even better—the risk of being found out always makes things more exciting.”
“No,” Mom protested, but it was weak. She hesitated, my dad’s hand stretching to her, inviting her, and then she caved. One moment she was standing several feet from him, the next, she was in his arms and they were kissing.
I looked at Matt. His eyes were open so wide, I was afraid the lids wouldn’t keep his eyeballs inside anymore. He glanced at me, blushing.
“Sorry,” I mouthed to him.
I’d like to say they left soon. But they didn’t.
In the meantime, Matt and I were trying to get comfortable without them hearing us shifting the branches around us.
When it became obvious that my parents were in their own world and probably wouldn’t notice much, Matt turned to me. “I can see where Molly gets it from,” he whispered.
I cringed when an extra loud and juicy smooching sound came from in front of us. “Yeah, it runs in the family.”
He raised his eyebrows, and then an evil grin crossed his face. “So . . . you’re like that, too?”
Oh, geez. That’s not what I’d been implying. I hesitated for a moment, then decided not to answer.
He probably sensed my reluctance. “Okay . . . so, you were in love with me, then changed your mind today, huh?” Another smile played around the corners of his lips.
I stared at his mouth for a moment before answering. I couldn’t help wondering what it would be like to kiss him. Curse my parents for sitting there, making out on the bench ten feet away! “Yeah . . .”
Another loud smack of lips from my parents.
He chuckled, and I glanced up. He looked into my eyes. “I’m sorry things have been difficult for you—I had no idea.” A troubled expression crossed his face.
“What?” I asked.
“I think you didn’t hear what I said earlier. She’s on the phone with someone. She was giggling a lot—it sounded like she was flirting.”
“Let’s not discuss that right now,” I whispered. I needed to ask Molly what was going on before I said anything to Matt. I hated the pain in his eyes, though, and especially hated the fact that it was being caused by my sister. “I’ll figure out who she’s been talking to. In the meantime, don’t worry about it, ‘kay?”
He nodded and his features relaxed. He glanced at my parents—they were being extra noisy—and dropped his eyes. Then he looked back at me. “Sammy, you’re one of the best people I’ve met. And one of the best singers. Can’t wait for tomorrow night.”
Ah, yes. The talent show. “We’re still doing Hold On?”
“Sure. Why not? It’s the one we’ve practiced the most.”
Suddenly everything was quiet on the bench. I looked. “They’re gone!” I whispered.
“Oh, good. I don’t think my legs could take any more crouching.”
We crawled out of the bushes, both of us groaning from being cramped up for so long. Matt got to his feet first, then helped me. We should’ve waited for the blood to go back into our legs a moment longer. I lost my balance, slammed into him, and he threw his arms forward—encircling me—in an effort to keep his balance. Unfortunately, the force of my tumble was too strong, and we both fell into the bushes again.
“Hello?” Mom called from around the corner. “Who’s there?”
Matt and I scrambled to get to our feet, but we still hadn’t fully maintained our balance when my parents rounded the corner, Mom holding my book.
“Oh,” Mom said. “Matt, Samara . . . what are you two doing out here?” Her eyes took in everything—our disheveled clothes, the twigs and leaves in our hair, the fact that Matt’s arms were still around me.
I stepped away from Matt. “It’s not how it looks.”
Dad raised an eyebrow. “Really? Do explain.”
“I came out here to read,” I said. “And Matt came out to . . . to . . .” I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t break Matt’s trust. But then, he hadn’t asked me not to say anything to my parents.
Matt finished for me. “I came to ask Sammy’s opinion about Molly.”
My parents’ eyes shifted to Matt, both looking quizzical.
Matt stumbled around, trying to find something to say, and I blurted out the truth.
“She’s been flirting with someone on the phone, and he was wondering if I knew what was going on.”
Matt looked down, and I could see the pain back on his face.
“Oh,” Dad said. He paused, then continued. “Well, that explains why you’re here, but why are you covered in leaves? And please, Samara, tell me why Matt’s arms were around you.”
“Dear, I think it’s obvious.” Mom’s face flushed. “They must’ve been talking here at the bench when they heard us coming. Isn’t that right, Sam?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t want you to find us alone together, so we hid in the bushes. And . . . you guys stayed on the bench for a while.” I looked away from them, but not before I saw my dad grin like a high-school boy and my mom blush even more.
Mom cleared her throat. “Sorry about that.”
Matt waved her off. “It’s fine. By the time we got out of the bushes, the blood had left our legs. We lost our balance and fell right when you were coming back.”
“Easy enough to explain.” Dad laughed. “Matt, you’ll find that the guys are heading downstairs to watch a movie. Why don’t you join them?”
Samara, A Kilenya Romance (Kilenya Romances Book 1) Page 4
