For Love of Emily

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For Love of Emily Page 4

by Bonnie Gardner


  “If you’ll come over tomorrow right after school, I can help you get settled, and we’ll have dinner. Emily says my cooking leaves something to be desired, but I’m trying.” Thad smiled.

  It was the first time that Silver had seen him smile since that ill-fated night in August. Even in October, her recollections of the night, good and bad, had not dimmed.

  “Oh, but it can’t be that bad,” Silver teased, responding to Thad’s lightening of mood. Maybe, I can do this, she thought. Maybe, we can be friends.

  “I cook the things I cook very well,” Thad justified. “It’s just that my repertoire doesn’t quite appeal to the tastes of a twelve-year-old.” His expression at that moment was difficult to read. It seemed a mixture of bemused indulgence and adult puzzlement.

  Recalling the usual junior high cafeteria menu, Silver responded dryly. “I think Emily would probably be happy if you served nothing but hamburgers, French fries, and pizzas.”

  “My favorite,” Thad stated wryly.

  Suddenly Silver became aware of where she was. The tiny, monastic bedroom seemed to close in as tightly on her as Thad’s body filled his snug tee shirt.

  She caught her breath and tried to control her runaway pulse. How could her heart beat so fast? Just when she thought she might be able to carry this off, her heart had betrayed her. Could he see how she felt?

  Though those thoughts had transpired in less than a minute, time seemed to be moving in slow motion. As Silver struggled to contain her speeding heartbeat and force time to regain its normal pace, Thad seemed completely unaware of the effects he was causing. He gazed at her with those piercing blue eyes and, with this simple expression, threatened to completely undo Silver’s carefully controlled composure.

  She tried to speak, but only a squeak came out. She cleared her throat, shaking her head as she did. “You know what you haven’t shown me?” Silver finally managed.

  He shook his head, puzzlement evident in his expression. “I thought I’d been pretty thorough,” Thad said slowly as he turned toward the door. “What did I forget?”

  Silver breathed deeply again as if the air supply had suddenly increased. Thad had finally reached the door, and with his broad back to her, she could again think. “I imagine I’ll have to do some laundry sometime. Do you have a washing machine, or will I have to go to a launderette?”

  “Isn’t that just like a woman?” Thad drawled as he turned lazily back around to look at Silver. “I probably wouldn’t have thought of that until I had no more clean underwear.”

  He could have mentioned any other article of clothing than something as intimate as underwear. The heart rate that Silver had fought so hard to keep slow, raced forward. “Some of us do plan ahead,” she replied primly.

  “I suppose they do,” Thad remarked softly.

  What does he mean by that? Silver thought as she followed him downstairs. Why did she have to try to read things into everything he said? Why did he always do this to her? Carole would know. She’d say I was in love, Silver thought disgustedly.

  How could she possibly be? She barely knew the man, and in spite of their eventful first meeting, she hadn’t made enough of an impression on him for him to remember her.

  But then, what might happen if he did?

  Chapter Four

  If Silver had harbored any notion of a good night’s sleep the night before she reported to Thad’s house, it was soon dashed. Her thoughts about sleeping under the same roof with him careened and crashed around in her head like waves against rocks. She spent the night fighting off the now familiar dreams of what had happened in July. After four hours of restless dozing, Silver crawled out of bed and set to the business of making ready to move into the Thibodeaux home.

  “Move in,” thought Silver, half aloud. I wonder how I’d feel if I were actually moving in, instead of being situated like a maid? As she stripped her sheets from the bed that she wouldn’t be using for the next two weeks and stuffed them into the laundry basket, she allowed her mind to take a trip to the future.

  The time trip was cut short by the jarring sound of the alarm forgotten since she’d gotten up before it. She silenced it with more force than necessary then turned it off entirely.

  As Silver surveyed her room, bare of covers, stripped of the personal things that made it hers, she could not help feeling a sense of finality to her leaving. Though she knew she would return in a couple of weeks, she sensed that afterwards things would be very different. At least, she hoped so.

  By the time Silver had put her bed in order, ready with clean sheets to welcome her home, and stuffed the last few items into her suitcase, Carole was up and tossing innuendos right and left.

  “Hey, roomie. How’s it feel to be a kept woman?” Carole teased as she poked her freshly washed and toweled head into Silver’s room.

  “I won’t know until tomorrow,” Silver replied through clenched teeth as she forced her too-small suitcase shut. “You’ll have to ask me then,” she added as she latched it.

  “That I’ll do,” Carole replied. “I expect a blow by blow account with all the details no later than tomorrow night.”

  “Carole,” Silver replied patiently. “There will probably be nothing to report. I am the hired help. This is hardly an assignation.”

  “But you’ll be alone in his house. All night.”

  Shocked, Silver fired back. “Even if I was willing to let something happen, there will be a twelve-year old chaperone in the room across the hall.”

  “Just keep your options open,” Carole said.

  Yawning, Silver shook her head and turned toward the bathroom. “If you haven’t used all the hot water, I’d like to take a shower. Maybe I’ll be able to parry with you better with a clear head.”

  “Not thinking clearly are we?” Carole countered with a knowing look. She laughed. “I guess you are clear-headed enough. You remembered that the K-I-D will be there.”

  Silver threw up her hands and with a quick roll of her eyes, headed into the bathroom, leaving her roommate to romanticize alone.

  The shower helped a little, and Silver did feel more alert. She had functioned with less sleep in college during exams and survived; she would survive now. It only took a little more making up than usual to make her look as if she’d had the good night’s sleep she’d missed.

  She could fake it until four o’clock.

  Then what?

  ****

  Silver wended her way through rush hour traffic, through unfamiliar streets until she reached Thad’s neighborhood. Though her destination was closer to the school than her own apartment, the trip seemed endless, and having to play salmon swimming upstream at spawning time in the traffic didn’t help. By the time she arrived, she was hot, tired, and irritable. She had all but forgotten her discomfort about sleeping under Thad’s roof.

  Emily, who had ridden the school bus home and was already there, greeted Silver in the driveway. “I thought you’d never get here!” she announced with all the drama only a twelve-year-old girl could. She grabbed the first suitcase as soon as Silver managed to get the trunk open.

  “Teachers do have to stay and clear their desks and do teacher things at the end of the day while the building is quiet,” Silver replied as she removed the overnight case and another small suitcase. She slammed the trunk shut.

  “You could grade papers here just as well as at school,” Emily chided.

  “But I couldn’t run copies of that nine hundred-page grammar test, could I?” Silver joked as she followed the girl up the path to the house.

  “We wouldn’t mind if you didn’t get around to it,” Emily countered.

  “Oh, really? Maybe you’d like to copy it off the blackboard instead,” Silver teased.

  The dark, masculine living room made Silver stop. The somber tones of the room undid the bright feelings the Indian summer afternoon had inspired in her. The heavy drapes were open and the unfiltered autumn light seemed to make every detail harsher than the soft lamplight h
ad the night before. A wave of uneasiness washed over her as she recalled her initial misgivings about being there.

  Emily, oblivious to Silver’s change in mood, chattered on. “Daddy is in the kitchen. He’s making his world-famous spaghetti. He puts mushrooms in it. I used to not like mushrooms, I thought they tasted slimy, but now I got used to them since Daddy makes his spaghetti. Do you like mushrooms in your spaghetti?”

  Silver continued to stand in the middle of the room, drinking in its aura. Last night in the soft lamplight the room had seemed inviting; now it seemed cold.

  Last night Thad had been in it.

  Just like Thad, Silver thought, as she recalled how quickly he had changed from interesting companion to cruel stranger that night in July. She winced as she remembered his stinging words.

  “Miss Burdette, aren’t you coming?” Emily turned back to see what was detaining her teacher.

  “I’m sorry, Emily. I was just looking at your father’s living room. Did I miss something?”

  Emily wrinkled her nose. “You like this room? It gives me the creeps.” As with any other twelve-year-old, Emily flitted to another topic. “I was asking you if you liked mushrooms in your spaghetti.”

  “Why?” Silver asked, having missed most of Emily’s monologue.

  “Because that’s what my dad is fixing for supper.”

  The aroma of tomatoes and herbs wafted into the hallway on the draft created by the open front door and tickled Silver’s nose as it passed. “Mmm. It smells divine. I thought your father said he couldn’t cook,” Silver murmured, appreciating the luscious smell as she closed the open door.

  Emily deposited the suitcase she’d been carrying at the foot of the stairs before she replied. “He can cook, all right. He just doesn’t cook a lot of things that I like,” she explained. She took Silver’s suitcase from her and set it beside the first one. “Just put your other bag here. Dad will carry them up later.

  “Let’s see if supper’s ready. It sure makes me hungry smelling it.” Emily pirouetted, sending her long, brown hair flying, and led the way to the source of the aroma.

  Silver lingered in the hallway, postponing the meeting with Thad. Though she had told her roommate that her arrangement with the major was only business, she had not yet convinced herself.

  “Are you coming?” Emily’s eager face reappeared at the end of the hall. She beckoned urgently. “Daddy is waiting for you.”

  Forcing a brave smile, Silver followed Emily to the kitchen.

  The man in the kitchen was far different from the sides of Major Thibodeaux that she had seen so far. Standing in a cloud of steam, still wearing boots and camouflage pants and a brown tee shirt, Thad worked over a large pot of bubbling red sauce. As he reached for the package of noodles, his muscles rippled under the tautly stretched fabric of his brown military undershirt. Silver gasped faintly as she watched the way he worked while performing the decidedly domestic task.

  Thad acknowledged her presence without looking up. “I’m glad you’re finally here,” he greeted her curtly. “I’ve been waiting to put the noodles in.”

  “Sorry. There’s quite a bit of traffic at this time of day. I wasn’t expecting anything so elaborate when you said you’d cook supper. It wasn’t necessary. The way Emily talked the other day and from what you said last night, I anticipated something less, less… ” Silver groped for the appropriate word.

  “Gourmet?” Thad supplied as he stirred the noodles. “We don’t eat C rations here,” he added dryly.

  “I know. It’s MREs now, anyway. Remember, my dad was in the air force and told us all about Meals Ready to Eat.” Silver felt compelled to explain. “It’s just that most men of my acquaintance seem to lean towards steak on the grill or microwave dinners.”

  “You sound like a female chauvinist,” he replied sternly, then grinned.

  It was a new look. Another of the many layers of Thad Thibodeaux that Silver enjoyed uncovering. It was the same endearing, impish look she had seen so many times on one or another of the boys in her class just when he was ready to ask a favor or admit guilt. Silver’s heart jumped.

  She managed to return the grin and said, “My apologies. I seem to be allowing my cultural biases to show. We women grumble about being told what constitutes women’s work, but when we see a man doing it, and doing it well, we feel threatened.”

  “Apology accepted.” Thad produced an aluminum colander and placed it in the sink. “As soon as I drain these noodles, we can eat.” He reached for a pair of mismatched pot holders and proceeded to pour the boiling noodles and water into the colander.

  Suddenly, Silver realized she could be doing something to ease the awkwardness of the moment. “Forgive my manners. What can I do to help?”

  The major, still busy over his pots, replied, “As soon as I get this dispensed, you can help me carry things in. Emily has already set the table.”

  Silver looked around. She had been so preoccupied watching Thad at work that she had momentarily forgotten Emily, her reason for being there. “Speaking of Emily, where is she?”

  Hearing her name, Emily reappeared. “Here I am.” She poked her head into the kitchen from the dining room. “I was trying to fold napkins.” She held up a crumpled white linen triangle. “I wanted to make one of those duck things you see in restaurants.” The child gazed forlornly at her handiwork.

  “Well, you’re braver than I, sweetie. All I know is how to fold them the regular way. Let’s go see what we can do.” Silver herded the child into the dining room, relieved to be free of the tension she felt whenever she was at close quarters with Emily’s father. The effort it had taken for her to maintain her composure while dealing with Thad had taken its toll on her shoulders.

  Silver shrugged off the stiffness and worked the tense muscles in an effort to relieve the tightness that had resulted from a day of nervous anticipation as she appraised Emily’s efforts at napkin folding. It took only a few minutes for them to devise another treatment for the napkins and set them on the table. Emily had done an expert job of setting plates, silverware, and even crystal glasses. With the final touch of neatly folded napkins, the table was finished.

  ****

  Thad watched the homey, domestic scene through the doorway as he prepared the food for the table. He wondered absently if this was how life would have been with Angelie had they stayed together. Would a scene like this be so routine that he wouldn’t even notice? He wondered, with a pang, what he and Emily had missed.

  The meal was ready, but the two women, one small, one taller, were still chatting amiably as they worked with the napkins. He’d have time to change clothes and into something more appropriate. He knew this wasn’t a date, yet Thad wanted to put himself forward as something other than the military man he was. He shrugged and left the kitchen, peeling off the brown tee shirt as he went.

  It only took a moment to exchange the army green for his favorite blue polo shirt. It took longer to get out of the high, laced boots and uniform pants, but they were soon replaced by slacks and comfortable, black loafers. He had just enough time to splash some water on his face to remove the grime of work and cooking before he went back down.

  The scene hadn’t changed, Thad noticed with satisfaction as he entered the kitchen. He called to his daughter and her teacher and wondered why Sylvia Burdette seemed so important to him. It was more than the fact that he was entrusting her with the care of Emily. Miss Sylvia Burdette bothered him the way a woman bothered a man.

  And that didn’t make sense.

  She was his daughter’s teacher, and that was all.

  “Done,” Emily announced with satisfaction as she straightened the glasses for the umpteenth time.

  He called again. “Emily, Miss Burdette, if you will help me carry out the dishes, we can eat.”

  “We’ll be right in.” Miss Burdette bustled into the kitchen. Thad handed her a wooden salad bowl and a wicker basket containing spicy garlic bread that peeked from beneath a red-check
ered napkin.

  Thad followed her, carrying the main course. He smiled to himself as he realized that Miss Burdette had noticed he had changed while she and Emily had worked on the napkins.

  “You look like a lioness stalking her prey with your eyes so intently on me,” Thad commented as he placed the platter heaped high with noodles and sauce in the center of the table.

  Miss Burdette turned away, her alabaster skin flushing. Thad chuckled as she groped for something to cover her embarrassment. She came up with a variation of one of the oldest army jokes he knew.

  “Forgive me for staring,” she stammered. “I can see you now that the camouflage is gone. Your secret is out. I know what you really look like.”

  “Then I guess I’ll have to kill you to keep the secret from leaving the room,” he countered in a deadpan voice.

  “No!” shrieked Emily.

  Both adults swung their heads to look at the terrified child.

  Silver was the first one to reach her. As she pulled the frightened child to her, she spoke softly. “It’s all right, honey. It’s only a silly joke and not a very funny one. I’ve heard it before, so I wasn’t surprised.”

  “But I guess you haven’t,” Thad said reassuringly as he reached for his daughter. He wrapped his arms around the child and included Silver in his embrace.

  “I knew that,” Emily stated bravely with a slight wobble in her voice. She pushed herself out of the huddle and turned to her father, her hands on her narrow hips. “It was not a very funny joke,” she told him sternly.

  “Yes, ma’am. You’re absolutely right. I won’t ever use it again.” Thad saluted and tried to look properly chastened. “Am I forgiven?” He held his arms out for his child.

  Emily dove into Thad’s arms again, burrowing her elfin face into his chest. “Don’t scare me like that anymore,” she answered in a muffled voice.

 

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