I couldn’t keep the trace of bitterness completely at bay and Markus heard.
“You are not content,” he said, his gaze searching me. “You are trapped and refuse to see the way out.”
“I see more than you think.”
“Then why is Nathanial still breathing?” he said, a softly-spoken, chilling threat.
A bolt of fear kicked through me. Not just the consequences of Nathanial’s untimely and unnatural death. My old conundrum had returned, the one I didn’t understand and couldn’t solve. I wanted to kill Nathanial but I didn’t want him dead.
I took a slow, shallow breath to steady my voice. “Revenge begets revenge and it’s a never-ending circle. Our marriage is intended to stop the cycle, not start a new one.”
“You put a lot of faith in the institution of marriage,” Markus said darkly. “It won’t protect you from Nathanial any more than the title of High Chancellor protected Devon Welsh.”
“Nathanial would never hurt me.” Not physically. “He hasn’t so much as laid a hand on me.”
“Are you saying he has not touched you?”
Suddenly we were talking about my marriage bed. I could pretend we weren’t, but that wouldn’t shift Markus’ conviction that Nathanial had to die for me to live. “Nathanial has agreed to give me all the time I need to adjust to the situation. He has high stakes in this marriage. He doesn’t want me gone, Markus, he really is determined for me to rule at his side.”
Some of the tension leeched from Markus’ features. Still, he warned, “You are a beautiful woman and Nathanial requires an heir. He won’t wait forever.”
“That is between me and Nathanial.”
“And if he ever even looks at you with harmful intention,” Markus said, “that is between Nathanial and me and I will cut him down.”
I smiled at his fierce loyalty. “I would expect nothing less.”
A heartbeat passed as we shared a look of understanding, and another, and then I turned to walk deeper into the cave. The daylight cut off as I rounded a corner and memory took over. I swung myself up onto the narrow ledge that fed into the map room and swiped aside the tapestry to enter. The lanterns were still lined up against the wall for my searching fingers to find and I quickly struck the flint. A flicker, then the warm glow melted off the blackness. I lit a second lantern to carry with me as I glanced around the room.
The walls were bare rock, stripped of the canvas maps that had given this room its name. The chest in the corner was gone.
“I cleared everything out when I came looking for David,” Markus explained, joining me.
“Good.” The struggle was over, but this had still been our inner sanctum, the heart of our rebellion, and I didn’t like the idea of it exposed to strange eyes. “Where did you take it?”
“One of our hidey holes along the west ridge.” Markus folded his hands behind his back as he strolled into my line of view. “I also moved the iron box and collected all the weapons we hadn’t handed in. It’s all hidden.”
The iron box held our precious store of medicines, all pilfered from the castle infirmary by Jarvis and Lennard’s spies. Revealing what was inside that box could spur Nathanial into a witch hunt. The weapons were another matter. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I’m telling you now.”
I set the lantern on the table and folded my arms, looking at Markus.
He pushed a hand through his hair, his gaze dropping to my hip and the notable absence of my sword before he brought it up to meet mine. “You’re committed to peace, Rose.”
“The safety of our people comes first,” I stated calmly.
“I’m well aware of that.” Markus shoved a hand through his hair again and broke eye contact to pace. “But they are not the threat to Nathanial’s power. He turned his back on you once before, Rose, and I will be prepared in case he does so again.”
Doubt clawed my mind. Was I being too complacent? We’d been here before. Nathanial had left us alone for ten years, lulled us into a sense of security. I thought I knew better now. He’d brought me to my knees. There was nothing left for him to take that he didn’t already own, including the High Chancellor heir.
“I miss my father,” I murmured. “He always knew what to do.”
“No one always knows what to do.” Markus paced his way to me. “Not him. Not you. Not me. We do the best we can with what we’re given.”
I rolled my eyes. “And I’ve been given a kingdom.”
“Yes, you have.” A grin tugged at his mouth. “Of course, it would be simpler if you did not have to share it.”
“Since when have you preferred simple to a challenge?” I laughed.
“Not often.”
“Speaking of challenges…” I pulled a face. “I have to learn to dance for the Hunt Ball and apparently you’re the man to teach me.”
“Amelia.”
“I did not say it.”
“She always did admire my moves,” Markus said with a grin. He unsheathed his sword and lay it on the table.
“I didn’t mean right this second.”
He held out a hand to me. “No time like the present and we’ve got time to kill before the scavengers get here.”
I unfolded my arms to take his offered hand and he gently pulled me closer. Once he’d rearranged us, my free hand rested on his hip and his on mine.
I tilted my head back to look at him. “Okay, now what?”
“It’s not all that different to sword play, anticipate my next move and go with it.” He shifted one leg forward and I instinctively glided back a step. “You’re a natural. Now count the beat in your head. One. Two. One Two. One Two…”
He slid to the right and I went with him. As it turned out, it really was like sword play and I was a natural. My instincts and reflexes were honed for this. The slight pressure applied by his hand on my hip guided me. As soon as he tensed a muscle to move, I knew his direction.
“Most of the dances are this basic two-step,” he said after we’d practiced for a while, “but the balls always open with the River Waltz.”
“That sounds ominous.”
Markus chuckled. “It is trickier. The couples form a loose ring and start the dance like this.”
He led me into the steps as he spoke. The basic two-step again, but it was always back, left, forward, dip—his hand slid from my hip to the base of my spine and he bent over, dipping me into shallow backward bow. Back, left, forward, twirl—he extended our joined hands and spun me away from him and into what would be the hand of the man to my left. He didn’t let go, though, he unspun me all the way back until I crushed into his chest.
He staggered back with an exaggerated oomph.
I thumped his chest, laughing. “I’m not that heavy.”
He laughed, too, and pulled me close again. “Let’s try that again, but maybe a little lighter on the feet this…” He trailed off as his gaze drifted over my shoulder.
Instantly alert, I extracted myself from his arms and turned.
Nathanial stood there, the tapestry still settling into place behind him. He was clearly not amused. His gaze bored into Markus and didn’t falter once, not even for me when I turned.
“I’d like a private word with my wife,” he said, his voice silken steel.
Markus put a hand on my shoulder, spoke near my ear. “I don’t have to go.”
“I’ll be fine.” I glanced at him, raised my voice for Nathanial to hear. “I’d like a private word with my husband, too.”
A smirk touched Markus’ lips and probably stayed as he grabbed his sword and stalked out, nearly brushing shoulders with Nathanial.
Nathanial’s jaw clenched, a storm brewing in his eyes as he walked up to me.
“We were only dancing,” I said.
“So I see.” He stopped a foot from me. “What are you doing here?”
“Disappointed I found out about your raid?” I scowled into his stone-grey eyes. The storm was gone. Maybe I’d imagined it. “This cave
might not seem like much to you, but it was my home and this…” I twirled a finger at him and all his men I couldn’t see, “…feels like an invasion.”
“That’s exactly how I didn’t want you to feel,” he said. “We’re not here to intrude, Rose.”
“Then what in blazes are you here to do?”
“Our civilians are neither trained nor permitted to bear arms.” Nathanial rubbed a hand over his brow. “We’re just here to sweep for weapons, to ensure no one has access to any lying around. My men have instructions to be respectful while they search.”
“Is this how we trust each other? Me supposedly stockpiling weapons and you snooping around behind my back?”
“It’s not you I don’t trust, it’s the influences you surround yourself with.”
His suspicions cut close to the mark. Too close. “Are we talking about Markus again?” I said dismissively.
He cocked his head. A shaft of black hair fell across his cheek and grazed his chiselled jaw. “Do you know he was once engaged to Amelia?”
“I know.”
“My uncle took Amelia from him and now I have taken you.”
I swallowed a snort. He’s seriously reducing Markus’ issue with him to vindictive jealousy? “I’ve never belonged to Markus.”
“And Markus is making damn sure you’ll never fully belong to me.”
Now I didn’t even have to play dumb. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“The more he whispers poison in your ear,” Nathanial growled, “the less interest you show in fulfilling your wifely duties.”
“You are the one who insisted I take the time to overcome my natural aversion,” I said. “Do not put that on Markus.”
“My mistake, then,” he murmured, soft and gravel. His eyes sank into me, warmed like a patch of sun on a winter’s day. “It seems it is I who should be making more of an effort.”
His head dipped lower and I was noticing again, his hollowed jaw, the firm line of his mouth, the silken glide of his hair. I noticed. I was intensely aware of every arrogant line carved into his darkly beautiful face, but I wasn’t falling for any of it. The most important parts of me, my head and heart and soul, couldn’t be seduced.
His gaze drifted to my mouth and I tensed. “Don’t.”
He paused, his mouth an inch from mine. Seconds dragged into minutes, that’s what it felt like before his hooded eyes lifted again and he stood back, studying me with an ironic smile.
Then he shrugged and turned and walked away as if I had the power to wrap his will around my little finger with a single breathless word. I didn’t know why and I didn’t trust it or the sudden ache in the pit of my stomach as I watched him slip around the tapestry.
- 16 -
Our chat over coffee the next morning was decidedly less banal. I’d hoped we were done with this conversation, but apparently not.
“I’ve been thinking about Markus,” Nathanial said, his eyes tracking me as the smell of roasted coffee beans lured me to the sideboard.
“I really wish you wouldn’t,” I muttered beneath my breath. This fixation of his could only lead to trouble.
I lifted the pot from the warming tray and poured a mug of coffee to bring with me as I planted myself in the wicker chair across from Nathanial.
The parlour was tucked beneath the south turret, too small for a proper dining table, but the informal arrangement was part of the appeal. That, and the blush of colour unfurling from the rose garden outside and the morning sunlight that would be flooding through the slash of tall windows if the sky weren’t broiling with a tempest of stormy clouds.
Usually our conversation would centre on the coming storm, maybe flit around some anecdotes from last night’s supper, and I tried to steer us there.
“Those look like hail clouds.” I peered at Nathanial over the rim of my mug, inhaling the aromatic blend until it coated my taste buds. He was clean shaven, yet shadows still managed to lurk in the hollow of his jaw. “When the storm breaks—”
“I’d like to grant Markus the Barony of Edgefield,” Nathanial cut through my verbal mush.
I would have spewed coffee all over myself if I’d actually been drinking. Edgefield. One of the oldest, most prestigious baronies in the kingdom, created for the younger daughter of the first King. The last surviving heir died when I was a child. “Edgefield was returned to the crown.”
A slow grin slid across his mouth as he watched me. “That would be why it’s available.”
“It’s not simply available.” I scowled at him, wondering what game he played now. “It’s held in reserve for future royal offspring.”
“Traditionally, yes, but that’s not written law.” He shrugged, sipped on his coffee. “I can do whatever the hell I want with the baronies.”
“And you want...?” My mind raced. Edgefield was a half day’s ride from town, a sprawling estate on the other side of Lake Ether. I gave a dry, humourless laugh as Nathanial’s generosity suddenly made sense. “By God, you really are desperate to get Markus as far from me as possible.”
“Now there’s a pleasant thought.” His grin stretched wider. “Unfortunately, my barons are always welcome at the castle. Some never leave,” he drawled, referring to his uncle James.
“You wouldn’t force Markus to remain on the estate?” I questioned suspiciously.
“I’m not in the habit of forcing my will of any baron.”
“Oh, I’m sure you’ll find a way to call this an exception, not a whim.”
“With the title comes power, Rose, and if I crush one baron beneath my heel, fear fosters in the others. I may be King, but I cannot stand alone. Why do you think the baronies were created?”
I leant forward to set my mug on the low table between us, stayed there with elbows digging into my knees as I stared at him.
“This isn’t a trick.” He drained his coffee and slung forward, dipped his head to square a sober look on me. “Markus will gain a seat on my advisory council. He will have a voice in this kingdom. His interests will be invested in our land and our ways, not just in his High Chancellor and a patch of mountain.”
My eyes narrowed into slits. “You are serious about this.”
“Markus Forrester is not a man to sit on the fence or be ignored,” he said. “He’s either a valuable friend or formidable foe. Given your fondness for the man, I’ve decided to try the former. The rest is up to you.”
And here it came. The condition. A thin smile curled my lips. “And what would you demand in order to make this happen?”
“Markus will never accept anything from me,” Nathanial said bluntly. “I have to grant the barony, but you must be the one to present him with the offer. If he assumes it’s your idea…”
“How could he refuse?” I said, my gaze slicing into Nathanial, my voice hardened with accusation. “Why would he? He’ll think this is what I want.”
Nathanial looked, his gaze warming where mine sliced, his voice butter soft when he countered, “Why wouldn’t it be what you want?”
Because… Because I was missing something. Because Nathanial was up to something and I couldn’t see, I couldn’t see what the blazes it could possibly be. Because there was no way on earth Nathanial would grant Markus a prestigious barony, any barony at all, just to please me.
“I’ll think about it,” I said.
“Thank you.” Nathanial stood, those stone-baked eyes raking over me, his mouth slowly tugging at the corner. “Have I mentioned? You look breathtakingly beautiful this morning.”
Butterflies flustered my pulse and it took me far too long to pull my gaze from his heated appraisal and wicked grin. By the time I did, he was already walking off and I was left behind with flushed skin and seeded doubts.
What if Nathanial really meant it?
Was I so blinded by past sins, I couldn’t see him trying to right some small part of all the wrongs he’d done?
It wasn’t enough, there was nothing Nathanial could do that would ever be en
ough, but this didn’t require my forgiveness. All it required was an ounce of trust and Markus would be elevated to a status he’d well and truly earned.
But that was the problem.
Trust.
How could I ever again trust the man who’d turned his back on me when I needed him most? I’d fallen to my knees and begged. With tears streaming down my cheeks, I’d pleaded mercy for my father’s life. And he had looked straight through me. He’d turned his back on me and condemned my father.
Then, I’d never have believed Nathanial capable of feeling nothing, nothing for me at all.
Now I didn’t know how to believe he had any emotion running through his cold, cruel veins at all.
My stomach twisted into knots, this brand new reaction Nathanial seemed to invoke when he showed a scrap of human decency or a glimpse into the man I’d once thought him to be. Thankfully it didn’t happen often.
With my appetite churned to acid, I forewent my usual croissant. After dashing upstairs to fetch my sword, I made my way outside, through the forest to the barracks. Humidity thickened the air. Gusts of wind scattered the leaves at my feet, thrashed the tops of the Douglas firs. Above, the sky was a dark, turbulent mass. A bad day for hunting, as my father would say. The deer sheltered in the foliage. Rabbits and foxes burrowed deep. All you’ll get is a good soaking.
My steps slowed as I looked up at the thunderous sky, thinking about all the things my father had taught me and the one thing he deliberately hadn’t. What it truly meant to be High Chancellor. In his mind, had he really condemned me and my children and my children’s children to that mountain? Had he never envisioned a day when I might return to court and reclaim my rightful place?
I’d always understood otherwise. Men like Jarvis and Lennard, and most of my mountain rebels, had always understood otherwise. My father could never go back, but there was no reason for me to die in exile. I would one day return and take with me those who wished to go.
Then Nathanial murdered my father and everything changed.
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