And my mom only shook her head.
“Sadly honey, Halson’s done nothing but be himself,” she said. “It’s me. I’m the one who lets myself get carried away, dreaming about princes with castles, crowns, and big bank accounts. And Halson’s got all that, it’s just not enough,” she said self-pityingly.
“Not enough?” I asked, confused. “What are you looking for exactly then?”
“That’s it,” said Candace, eyes downcast, wringing her hands like a damsel in distress. “I don’t know, I want to be happy, but I just keep looking and I can’t find it!” she exclaimed, looking at me with her eyes full of tears, pleading with me to understand. “This royal coup has been the last straw too. Your husband, he was so commanding, so tall, so brave, and my husband,” she continued, her mouth twisting in disgust, “he was a coward, standing by as his own father was dethroned, doing nothing for his country, for himself.”
That took me aback.
“But Mom,” I said slowly, “Halson’s never been uh … an alpha male, should we say? I mean, everyone knows that he’s kind of shy, right? So was this all news to you?”
“No it’s not news to me,” snapped Candace, “I just want more. I want someone vibrant, alive, manly, and Halson, well, he’s not that,” she said firmly.
I sat back. I could tell that nothing about my mother had changed. She’d started out saying that it was her problem, that the problem was in her head, her thoughts, her desires, but sure enough, the conversation had turned to Halson’s faults. Somehow, Candace had been able to reason her way to the conclusion that it was her husband’s doing, that he was to blame for everything, even though he’d done nothing but be himself.
And as I walked slowly back to my room, my thoughts whirled. Was I doing the same? Was I following the same pattern? My husbands were doing nothing but being themselves as well. Hayden and Holt were princes of the kingdom, loyal to a fault, and they’d been straight with me. Slovania was their love and had been their love since birth. I was an interloper of sorts, a woman they’d married only recently. Was it realistic for me to force them to change? Was it realistic for me to drive the Slovanian out of their blood, out of their very own DNA?
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Summer
“Are you sure you want to do this, Mom?” I asked slowly, my expression somber. “Because once it’s done, it can’t be undone.”
And my mom turned to look at me, the wind whipping through her hair, making it into a froth of blonde strands.
“I’m sure baby, I know what you think of me, that I’m a good-for-nothing will-o-the-wisp, but this time I’m sure,” she said emphatically. “I want a divorce.”
And I just shook my head. Because we were in front of the Donkey Club again, looking at its massive doors. Slovania has traditions, many of them revolving around the donkey, and marriage and divorce in particular have their own rules and customs. I’d gotten engaged by dancing at the Donkey for Hayden and Holt, and my mom wanted to do the opposite now. She would dance at the Donkey for strangers, taking money from them, signaling her intent to divorce.
And I was afraid for Candace, truth be told. I absolutely didn’t respect her reasons for leaving Halson after only mere months of marriage. After all, the man was just being himself. He was born shy, the pressures of being the Crown Prince had exacerbated it, but he’d never hidden his personality. Instead, it was Candace who was looking for … for what exactly? No one knew, not even herself.
And so we were here, in the Latin Quarter, the music pounding around us as my mom prepared to go in. I was disappointed, sure, but in a way resigned too. After all, Candace was just being herself – inconsistent with ill-defined goals, flitting from this to that, always changing her mind even when it was too late. Unfortunately, this time it meant that she would be rejecting the Halborg title, cutting ties with the royal family, and probably doing a ton of financial damage to herself.
But I wouldn’t give up so easily. As my mom reached a manicured hand towards the door, I slapped mine on top of hers, stopping her, forcing her to look at me one last time.
“Ma, are you sure?” I said forcefully. “Don’t do this on a whim, I know things look glum right now, but maybe it’ll be different in a month or so.”
But Candace just rolled her eyes.
“Halson, change?” she asked, exhaling loudly. “I don’t think so. That guy’s got mayonnaise for guts, he couldn’t grow a backbone if he tried,” she said exasperatedly. “Besides, it’s better if I do this,” she said with a bright smile at me. “That way, you’re not married to your uncle,” she added cheekily.
And that was true, if my mom and Halson divorced, then Hayden and I were no longer related. But I didn’t want to be the cause of her separation, not even one of the causes.
“Don’t do this for me,” I warned. “I’ve got my own life, my own priorities, my own goals,” I said. “Don’t think you’re doing me any favors,” I warned.
“Oh you!” pooh-poohed Candace again, reaching for the handle once more. “Baby, you don’t know how good you have it. Not one, but two handsome, dominant men, and now one’s King and the other’s Prime Minister. Honey, I’m proud of what you have, even if it’s untraditional,” she said, “I only wish Halson were more like his brothers,” she scoffed.
I shook my head. Candace clearly had no idea of the thoughts roiling my brain, of how torn I was over Holt and Hayden’s allegiances. If she knew that I hurt because they were too patriotic, too loyal to Slovania, the blonde would probably break down laughing before scolding me for my naïveté.
But maybe she had a point. Maybe I had to back up for a moment and look at what I really expected of the twins. Part of what drew me to them was their devotion to their country, whether operating on underprivileged children or taking up arms against their own father as part of the rebellion. Maybe I was being unrealistic, forcing them to choose between me and Slovania. And what if, just what if, they chose Slovania? What would happen then? My heart ached a bit from the thought, and I shook my head, confused but determined to make sense of it somehow.
Meanwhile, Candace had slipped into the dark of the club, the blaring music and multicolored lights flashing in my eyes, making me squint. I watched as the heavy door swung slowly shut, the music growing muffled, leaving me alone on the sidewalk outside. My mom was out to find her fortune … and I had to find mine as well.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Hayden
We were relaxing in the throne room after a long day of work, negotiating a new currency, setting up the infrastructure for a new bank, heck, even re-tooling parts of the Slovanian Constitution. Things had to be re-done from the ground up and Holt and I were in the midst of it all, rolling up our sleeves and putting in the hours. It was tough work but gratifying as well – our country was going to come out on top come hell or high water, and Holt and I were willing to sacrifice, give our blood, sweat and tears if that’s what it took.
I was just about to grab another slice of midnight pizza when a soft knock sounded on the door.
“Come in,” I called out. Hopefully it wasn’t Casper again with that tome of trade regulations. That stuff was boring as all get-out but it had to be reviewed.
But the door creaked open to reveal Summer, her figure as curvy as ever, tempting and tantalizing, even though she shot us only the faintest of smiles upon entering.
“How goes?” I asked, helping myself to a second slice while looking over her figure appreciatively. “You’re a sight for sore eyes.” My brother growled in agreement, his mouth full but his eyes devouring the brunette, taking in that luscious ass, the pendulous boobs and swaying hips.
A pause.
“I’m not sure how it goes,” replied Summer. “It’s complicated.”
Not exactly what you want to hear after a long day, but then again we hadn’t had a lot of time for our girl lately. Sure, our raging sex life continued, Summer’s cunny just as sweet, just as hot and available, but we hadn’t had
time to talk after each session, Holt and I were just dead tired, falling asleep immediately like two assholes. So I took a deep breath and tried to lighten the atmosphere.
“Complicated how?” I said with a grin. “Complicated as in you want more? Complicated as in we take you right now on this oak table, heels over your head?” I asked, waggling my eyebrows suggestively.
But Summer let out an exasperated sigh and glared at me.
“No, complicated as in real stuff,” she said, hands on her hips. “We need to talk.”
Oh shit. I hated that phrase, and evidently my bro did too because he went for it, balls to the wall, take no prisoners style.
“What’s complicated?” growled Holt, his expression grim. “We’re married, so it’s simple. You’re the queen.”
I nodded, almost afraid to breathe, the tension was that thick in the air. And the brunette sighed deeply before shooting us a look, a look that wives reserve for husbands.
“You know it’s not that easy,” she said slowly. “You know that a lot has happened lately and I’ve been really confused.”
Oh shit. It was worse than I thought. Holt and I had been busy recently, really busy getting together a new Parliament, appointing government figures, heck even hiring household staff. We’d hoped that Summer had gotten over her confusion on her own, but evidently that wasn’t the case. I tried to stay calm.
“What’s bothering you?” I asked, keeping my face impassive even though my heart beat at a million miles a minute. “Is it the coronation itself? Is it the fact that Constantine’s headed to the tribunal? Or that he may face execution? Because you know that he probably won’t get the death penalty, the Truth and Reconciliation tribunal doesn’t really do that.”
And Summer shook her head, her eyes far away.
“No, it’s not that,” she said slowly, “I know Constantine is going to survive, he’ll just spend a million years in jail. It’s just that … you know I’ve been worried because everything you’ve done, everything you do even now is for Slovania,” she said, her hands gesturing helplessly. “When will it stop? Will it ever stop? Where are your boundaries?” she asked.
Another silence.
“I hope those are rhetorical questions because you know we don’t have answers,” growled Holt, his brow stormy. “Don’t make us choose.”
“I know,” said Summer softly. “I’m just scared you know? Now that you’re King and Prime Minister, there’s even less stopping you. No one’s going to tell you ‘no,’ no one’s going to tell you ‘that’s enough.’ So where does that leave me?”
I paused for a moment.
“But baby, that’s it exactly,” I said, my deep voice persuasive, doing my best to make her see. So much hung in the balance and I couldn’t stand the thought of what might happen if this conversation didn’t go our way. “We need you,” I said, my voice low. “You. We need you to tell us if we’re overstepping boundaries, if we’re acting irrationally, if we’re making bad decisions. More than ever, we need you as our queen.”
And Holt nodded silently, his eyes boring holes into the brunette’s luscious figure. I could see my bro’s chest rising and falling quickly, his breathing uneven.
“It’s just that,” said Summer faintly, unable to meet our eyes. “It’s just that,” she continued after taking a deep breath and straightening her shoulders, “Slovania will always be in your blood, and I can’t compete. I just can’t. The country is your first love and will always be.”
And we had no words then. After all, Slovania was our first love, that was true.
“But baby,” I said persuasively, “we have more than enough room for you and Slovania. There’s plenty to go around, there are different types of love, this isn’t even making sense. What are you asking for exactly?”
And here, Summer turned away again, her gaze confused, the warm caramel flitting to ours for a second before moving away.
“I’m not sure,” she said quietly. “I’m not sure what I’m looking for, what I’m asking.”
And with that, she left the throne room quietly, the door shutting behind her with a quiet click. My brother and I looked at each other with a mixture of anger, confusion, panic, and most of all, worry. What was happening to us? What could we do? Was our threesome done for?
CHAPTER THIRTY
Summer
I lay quietly in bed, my hands on my abdomen. Although my tummy was still only a soft, gentle curve, something special lay beneath. A baby. I was having Holt and Hayden’s baby, though I haven’t told them yet.
And the thought makes me giddy with joy. A baby! Someone who would hopefully look just like his fathers, the black hair, the blue eyes, all set in chubby features that were oh-so-cute.
But at the same time, Hayden’s words rang in my mind.
What are you asking for exactly?
What are you asking for exactly?
What are you asking for exactly?
The words repeated themselves again and again and I shook my head, trying to get rid of the sound, the endless cycle that circled round and round. What was I looking for? What did I want?
Suddenly the phone rang.
“Hello?” I asked, then corrected myself quickly. “Ahoj?” I said quickly, my Slovanian accent flawless.
My mom’s voice came on, tinny and high-pitched, sounding like she was a million miles away.
“Oh baby, I finally got a hold of you!” she cried, “Can you hear me? I’m on a yacht in the Mediterranean.”
“Yes Mom, I can hear you,” I sighed. It was just like Candace to be sailing on a luxury yacht so soon after her divorce. Most people would have gone into hiding, or at least stayed low-profile for a while, but instead Candace had hooked up with some random rich guy and was sunning herself on the deck of a four-story monstrosity, a great white whale that sailed the high seas.
“Oh good,” she exclaimed into the phone. “I just wanted to check in, you know, like we talked about,” she said before squealing, “Phillip not now! Don’t touch me there, I have my daughter on the phone.”
And I literally held the receiver away from my ear, feeling nauseous. Candace was obviously doing the nookie with her new boyfriend and I had to listen to the playful slaps, the giggling, the x-rated huffing and puffing. Gross.
“What mom?” I said tiredly. “What can I do for you?”
“Nothing baby,” she squealed, giggling again, undoubtedly as this Phillip guy did something to her private parts. “I just wanted to see how you are.”
Well the answer was confused, achy, and tired, with a baby on the way, but I wasn’t about to tell her any of that.
“I’m good,” I said woodenly. “Thanks for calling.”
And my mom’s breathy sigh was all I heard in return. She was so distracted that there was no point in continuing the conversation, so I hung up slowly.
But I felt myself getting mad. Candace, as ditzy as she was, had done what she wanted. She’d moved onto the next step and was now partying it up, living the lifestyle she wanted with a new man, a new home, a new outlook on life. Halson Halborg, Prince of Slovania, was in her rear-view mirror, a distant memory already.
Should I do the same? After all, I, too, was a dynamic, independent woman. Why hang on to a dying dog, why beat myself up about things I couldn’t change, problems that had no answers?
But the thought of leaving the twins, especially like this, on the sly, tore at me. After all, I was pregnant with their child, and they were powerful men – they’d find out about the baby sooner or later. Plus, it wasn’t like I had a heap of financial resources. If I’d been a broke student before, living off work-study while taking my clothes off at the Donkey, I’d be in an even more precarious position now, with daycare, formula and diapers on my shopping list.
I sat up in bed. Holt and Hayden weren’t getting off so lightly, they were going to have to provide some answers. Otherwise, I’d be forced to leave for New York immediately … to dance at the Donkey again.
CHAPT
ER THIRTY-ONE
Holt
She came storming in, right when we were finishing up.
“Hayden, now, alone,” she commanded, sparks flying from her eyes.
All eyes flew to my brother, the big man at the head of the table, his face impassive.
“Gentlemen,” said my twin courteously, “please give the Queen and I some privacy.”
Slowly, our advisers gathered their papers, leaving single file while giving Summer the side-eye, shooting us curious looks. Maybe some folks thought it was weird that I stayed, but then again, I was brother to the King and maybe this was a family matter.
The door closed with a thump and Summer turned to us, her hands on her hips, brown curls flying.
“What can we do for you?” asked Hayden tiredly. “What is it this time?”
And I could tell that Hay was stressed, he was exhausted, this business being King is high-pressure and thankless in many respects. But our endless rounds as doctors had prepared us well, and we were making progress. Slovania was going to be okay.
I nodded silently, just as tired and burned-out. But I couldn’t help but look over our girl appreciatively, taking in the curvaceous figure, the big boobs, the small waist and wide hips. Summer was as gorgeous as ever and it was sheer heaven to come home to her each night, feel that warm, wet pussy wrapped around our cocks after a long day of work. Sure, we hadn’t been talking, not really, but it seemed like that was about to be rectified.
“I need answers,” she stormed, her face flushed. “Give it to me straight up. Me or Slovania?”
It almost sounded like she was asking about another woman, as if Slovania was the name of another female. But I decided to be direct. This was clearly a question that had been haunting her for weeks now, and she deserved to a real answer.
“We really don’t know,” I said slowly, honestly, “We just don’t know. The country means so much to us, our people mean so much to us, and we don’t belong to ourselves anymore. We’ll always be working for Slovania, we’re always going to do right by our people,” I amended, “our family is the Slovanian people,” I emphasized.
DOUBLE PRINCES: A Twin Step Royal Romance (With BONUS Book His Tight Little Brat) Page 14
