by Rick Hautala
“That was the next question you asked, after that noise we heard,” Eldon said in a hushed voice. Elizabeth glanced at him, about to say something, but he waved a silencing finger at her. “Shhush — now wait.”
After the backward voice stopped, there was a split-second pause of intense white noise. Elizabeth expected the sound to be as indistinguishable backward as it had been when played forward. She wasn’t ready for it when a whining voice hissed from the speakers, filling the room and sounding as clear as if it were right there beside her.
“I — saw — you — there,” the high-pitched voice said.
It was obviously that of a young girl, but in the instant, blinding rush of fear, Elizabeth couldn’t even begin to wonder whether or not it was Caroline’s voice. Astounded and terrified beyond belief, she collapsed backward, away from the stereo. With frantic, fear-filled eyes, she turned and looked at Eldon, a scream building up inside her chest, seeking to escape.
The tape played on, and the voice continued, stuttering on the words, “Here I ... here I ... “ It started to warble up the register, higher and higher until it faded away, leaving nothing but the reverse sound of white noise. With trembling hands, Elizabeth switched off tile tape player.
“I tole’yah,” Eldon said, smiling with satisfaction as he looked at Elizabeth and nodded. “We sure as hell got someone.”
Elizabeth was trying desperately to compose herself as she got to her feet and, trembling violently, went back to sit on the couch. A slick sheen of sweat had broken out on her forehead. She didn’t dare speak aloud for fear that nothing more than a terror-stricken whimper would come out of her mouth. She picked up her glass of water and took a sip.
“Why don’t’cha play the rest of the tape forward, ‘n’ we can see if there’s any thin’ else,” Eldon said calmly. “After that, we can play th’whole thing backward t’catch what we might’ve missed. I’d like to find out who we got here.”
Elizabeth hesitated, then with a deep sigh went over to the stereo and released the reverse button. After pressing the play button again, she sat on the couch beside Eldon. Her knuckles were bone white, and she held her breath as she clenched her hands in her lap and waited to hear the recorded words repeated. The only relief she felt was knowing that, played forward, they wouldn’t make sense ... even though she now knew what they said.
When they came again, they were the same as the first time she had heard them — nothing more than a warbling rush that rose up high as it repeated itself several times and then abruptly cut off. Elizabeth let her breath out in a slow, deep whistle. Echoing in her mind, she could still hear that tiny, high voice.
“I saw you there! ... Here I ... Here I ... Here I ... “
For several seconds there was just a faint trace of recorded white noise from the radio; then Elizabeth’s voice spoke out clearly, “I want to tell her that I ... that I didn’t want for her to die.” As terrified and as disoriented as she had felt back when she recorded those words, she now found it reassuring to hear her own normal voice. But even as relief spread through her, she knew she would never be able to forget that other voice. Someday she might find the courage to listen to that tape backward again, in a calmer moment. She would like to determine, if she could, if that had been Caroline’s voice. For now she wanted to dismiss it from her mind and continue listening to the tape.
“Caroline — honey,” her recorded voice said. “Can you ... can you forgive me for what ... happened?”
Another white-noise pause was all they heard, but now it seemed to pulsate with possibilities.
“Can you, honey?” the tape recorder said.
As soon as the word you was spoken, another rush of noise filled the tape. It was different this time, thank God; certainly nothing that sounded like someone trying to talk! This new sound came in hard, steady pulses, and Elizabeth had the mental image of a searchlight spinning rapidly, sweeping a wide arc around and around, bright for just the instant it focused on her, then fading rapidly as it spun away. She suspected this mental image arose unbidden from Eldon’s claim that white noise acted like the beacon of a lighthouse that drew attention from the spirit world. There was no denying there was something on the tape! The sound was dizzying as it warbled intensely, rising and fading and rising again.
“Oh, my God! Oh, my God!” Elizabeth muttered when she heard something that sounded like words flutter and fade in the rush of sound. “Oh, my sweet, loving Jesus!”
Elizabeth told herself I can’t be hearing this! It’s got to be my imagination!
Tension coiled inside her stomach like a poisonous snake preparing to strike. She was aware of a heavy-fisted pounding inside her head, and it took her a panicked instant to realize that it was her own heartbeat. A flush of cold gripped her body. She wanted to open her mouth, to say anything to Eldon that would break the tension that was spiraling up inside her, but she was filled with the fear that if she opened her mouth, all that would come out would be one long, never-ending scream. She had a vivid mental image of being hauled off to the psychiatric ward, still screaming until her throat and lungs began to bleed.
“D’yah hear that?” Eldon asked, his eyes twinkling with excitement. “D’yah hear that?”
Elizabeth nodded, even though her neck and shoulders felt like they were cast in iron. The rushing whoosh of words rose and faded, but each time they got clearer until, finally, there was no denying what was on the tape. Somehow-she didn’t know how Eldon’s tape recorder, had captured the only two words that could cut into her soul like the blue-white flame of a blowtorch.
“ ... Helpl ... Mommy! ... Help! ... Mommy! ... “
Elizabeth screamed. She wanted to get up off the couch and run from Eldon’s house; run all the way back to Bristol Mills if she had to to get away from it; run until she collapsed on the roadside and simply died of exhaustion or fright.
“I think that might do it for now,” Eldon’s voice said.
The voice was so clear that, for an instant, Elizabeth wasn’t sure if it had been on the tape or if Eldon had spoken those exact words again. “You can shut that thing off now, if yah’d like.” She heard the recorded click from her shutting off the tape recorder. Then there was nothing in the room except the sound of the blank tape, with no white noise, thankfully, being played on Eldon’s stereo. That sound and her own labored breathing filled the living room like the sound of a crashing tide.
Eldon got up off the couch and went over to the stereo system. He stopped the tape, then pressed the rewind button. Looking at Elizabeth, still sitting on the couch, he smiled grimly and said, “Well — now d’yah believe that somethin’ like this is possible?”
Elizabeth’s mouth made an odd gulping sound before she said, “I don’t ... know what to think.”
“D’yah feel like listenin’ to the whole thing in reverse now, or d’yah wanna take a little break from it?” Eldon asked.
“I could —” Elizabeth said, but then stopped and swallowed with difficulty. It felt as though a fist-sized rock was working its way down her gullet. “Another glass of water might be nice.”
“I think I’ll have a beer, m’self,” Eldon said. He turned to go out to the kitchen, but just then a loud squeaking sound drew his attention to the tape recorder. Elizabeth gave a startled little yelp.
“Ahh, dammit!” Eldon shouted as he jabbed the off button. When he snapped open the cassette lid, Elizabeth saw the problem. The tape had wrapped around the pickup spool inside the machine. It stretched and broke as Eldon tried to pull the cassette out of the deck.
“Friggin’ machine done et the tape,” he snarled as he held up a long strand of wrinkled tape for her inspection.
“Is it ruined?” Elizabeth asked. She didn’t voice it, but she felt a measure of relief, knowing she might never have to listen to that recorded voice again.
“‘Fraid so,” Eldon said as he pulled more destroyed tape from the innards of the machine. “Looks like I’m gonna have to cut it to get it al
l off the spindle. Damned shame, too! We had something purty interesting there, don’t’cha think?” He glanced at Elizabeth and smiled. “‘Least we got to hear it once. You can’t deny there was something there.”
“Umm,” Elizabeth said, as Eldon started for the kitchen.
“I’ll fetch yah that water, now,” he said. “Don’t’cha be goin’ anywhere.”
Elizabeth waited until he had left the living room before she collapsed back onto the couch. All the air in her lungs came out in one great, whooshing rush. She could hear the sounds Eldon made in the kitchen as he got their drinks ready, but deep inside her mind she could also hear something else — a faint, hissing white noise. Her eyes were sandpaper dry. She licked her lips nervously as she waited ... trying like hell not to think that from now on, for the rest of her life, she was going to hear that warbling voice and those words, repeated eternally —
“I saw you there ... “
“Help ... Mommy ... Help ... Mommy!
FOURTEEN
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1.
The day after Elizabeth went out to Eldon Cody’s farm was sunny and warm and by late morning, the temperature was heading up into the high seventies. Elizabeth knew she was being completely irresponsible, but she called Jake Hardy at the store and told him she was sick and wouldn’t be in for work. She just didn’t bother to notify Graydon that she would be missing her afternoon appointment.
After packing a picnic lunch, she threw a blanket and jacket into the back seat of her car and, with WXGL blasting a string of “oldies,” headed out to the beach at Kettle Cove to spend the day — alone. After everything she had been through recently — especially listening to that eerie voice on Eldon’s tape recorder — she needed time by herself to think.
She didn’t understand how that recorded voice could have been real. It didn’t seem even remotely possible that she could have heard someone sounding like a little girl say ...
“I saw you there! ... Here I ...”
And did it sound like Caroline? she wondered.
Where could that distorted, backward message have come from? Eldon had made such a show of not touching the blank tape after she unwrapped it, so if it was trickery, it was damned slick trickery. But she didn’t think Eldon was a fraud, so she found it most comfortable to attribute that voice to some stray radio signals either the recorder or the FM had picked up. That had to be the logical explanation, but even so, it didn’t explain everything, such as-why had she received the exact same message that had been haunting her all along? ...
“Help! ... Mommy! ... “
Now that she had some distance from that afternoon at Eldon’s, the whole thing was beginning to seem less real, and almost dreamlike. Elizabeth could almost convince herself that she had imagined hearing those words. The worst thing was something Eldon had pointed out to her just before she left his house. It was so simple, she was surprised that she had never considered the ambiguous meaning of the “Help! Mommy!” message. It could be read one of two ways, either as “Help (me) Mommy!” or (I want to) Help Mommy!
“Probably a damned good thing that the tape got ruined,” Elizabeth muttered to herself as she pulled into the parking lot at Kettle Cove. Unpacking the car, she walked down to the beach. Any agitation she was feeling quickly dissolved in the shimmering blue waves of the ocean and the hammering heat of the sun. The light offshore breeze at her back was warm and soothing. It lifted her hair and blew if forward into her eyes as she looked seaward at the heavy swell of the waves. Taking a deep, even breath of the salt-tangy air, she kicked off her shoes, thoroughly enjoying the sensation of hot sand beneath her feet as she wandered over the dunes, looking for the perfect spot to sprawl out.
She felt like a schoolgirl playing hooky as she spread out her blanket and sat down. This, she told herself, was all the therapy she needed to drive away any thoughts about disembodied voices, nightmare visitors, dug-up graves, and severed hands.
For the number of cars she had counted in the parking lot, the beach was remarkably deserted. Elizabeth could see only nine other people, either lying on beach towels or propped up in beach chairs. The loudest sound was the tearing rush of waves as they folded over onto the sand and pulled back, making the glistening pebbles along the shoreline rumble like distant thunder. Below that, faint with distance, she could hear the cry of sea gul1s wheeling high overhead. The ocean was dotted with dozens of lobster buoys, and several boats moved with a faint putt-putting sound back and forth across the water. The beauty of the sights and sounds reminded her momentarily of the view from Graydon’s office, but she didn’t allow the twinge of guilt for missing her appointment to last for long.
The sun, sand, and salty air all worked their magic. Even before she ate her lunch, Elizabeth was feeling refreshed and revitalized. Several times she shook her head, surprised to catch herself sitting up and just staring out at the heaving ocean without any particular thought in mind as she watched the play of light and motion. After eating lunch and lying in the sun for another hour or so, she shook the sand from her blanket, picked up her things, got into the car, and headed back to Bristol Mills.
Just after she crossed the town line, though, her bubble of wellbeing broke and her heart skipped a beat. She saw in the rearview mirror a police car pull out from a side road behind her.
A quick burst of the siren told her she was the one he was after. She slowed and pulled over onto the shoulder of the road, her heart pounding and hands tightening on the steering wheel as she watched the police cruiser’s door open and the cop get out. Her lap and arms were shaded by his shadow as he stepped up to the driver’s window and leaned down.
“I’m sorry, officer, I didn’t realize I was doing anything-” she said, turning to look up at the policeman. When she saw who it was, she finished with, “Why you lousy son of a bitch! You scared the hell out of me!”
Frank leaned down and smiled at her through the open window. In a low, menacing voice he said, “Just the facts, ma’m. I’d like to see your driver’s license and registration please.”
Only for an instant did Elizabeth think he was serious. Then his smile widened, and he burst out laughing.
“You bastard! For a minute, there, you had me wondering if I had done anything wrong,” Elizabeth said. The flush of panic she had felt as soon as she saw the cruiser had made her buoyant sense of well-being instantly evaporate; and seeing Frank, smiling though he was, only reminded her of all the things she was trying so desperately to forget.
“Oh, make no mistake,” Frank said, gripping the window’s edge and looking in at her. “I wanted you ... but for something other than a traffic violation.”
“And what might that be?” Elizabeth asked, feeling herself tightening up.
“Well —” Frank said. He straightened up and crossed his arms over his chest and, looking up and down the stretch of road, took a deep breath. “I really haven’t had a chance to talk to you since —”
“We don’t have anything to talk about, do we?” Elizabeth snapped. “I’d like to go, if it’s all right with you.” The longer she sat there, the more she resented Frank for shattering her good mood.
If he tells me something else has happened, or that they found something else out at Caroline’s grave, I’ll scream, she thought. I swear to God I will!
Flustered, Frank shrugged and said, “I kinda thought-at least I hoped-we had something more to talk about. I mean, I don’t want you to think that ... you know, that night out at Bristol Pond was — was some kind of setup.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah, really!”
Elizabeth sighed deeply, her hands tightening even more on the steering wheel. She watched her knuckles go white. The sound of her grinding teeth filled her ears.
“If you want to know what I truly felt,” she said, “I’ll tell you. You made me feel as though being with me was nothing more than part of your job. Part of your investigation! I felt like you were using me to get information about
Doug — unless I’m still a suspect in what’s been going on. Look, Frank, I don’t have any delusions, all right? I mean, I didn’t come back home thinking, ahh, now’s my chance to pick up where I left off with Frank, that maybe we could start living the life we should have had together right after high school. Okay? That’s bullshit! Whatever happened that night, happened; and now it’s over with. The sooner we get on with our own lives, the better off we’ll both be. Am I making myself clear?”
“Perfectly,” Frank said. He swallowed with difficulty as he regarded her. He took a deep breath before continuing, surprised at how faint, how feeble his words sounded when they came out.
“But — I dunno. I was sort of hoping there’d be more to it than that,” he said. Unable to look at her, he glanced down at the ground.
Elizabeth flashed him a questioning look. “What do you mean? I know damned well that you and those detectives think I might have been involved with what happened out at — uh — my uncle’s grave!”
A dark curtain dropped over her mind, and she realized that she hadn’t been able to say — at Caroline’s grave!
“If you want the truth, that entire evening — even when we were out at the pond — I felt as though you were observing and testing and probing me to see if I said or did anything to give myself away.”
“That’s not true,” Frank said, almost pleading. “It’s not like that at all. “
“Oh, sure — you say that now, but I don’t feel it! If you had even the slightest interest in —”
“But I do,” Frank said sharply. “That’s what I’m trying to tell you, for Christ’s sake! I do still feel ... a lot for you.” He took another deep breath and stared at her intently, his mouth set in a hard line. “Maybe you never felt it, but I sure did! As soon as I heard you’d come back home, I started hoping, as crazy as I knew it was, that you and I could pick up where we’d left off.”
