Finding Forever

by Amanda J. Evans

  The sound of someone clearing their throat caught my attention and I looked up to see a doctor standing over me.

  “Hello miss, I’m Doctor Phillips. It seems you’ve been through quite an ordeal; can you remember anything?”

  I thought for a second, my head hurt and my memories felt a little jumbled, like pictures but not in the right sequence.

  “Where’s Charles?” I blurted out.

  He was the most important thing. I needed to know what happened to him. Where was his body? Had those men left him to rot on the beach?

  “Ah yes, Charles, John said you kept talking about someone called Charles.” The doctor looked confused but his eyes carried a look of deep sympathy.

  “Charles, my husband. He was with me on the beach. He was… he died.” I spluttered as tears rolled down my cheeks. I could see him, my Charles, lying there on that beach, lifeless.

  “I see.” he nodded. “You’ve had a nasty blow to the head miss and you were quite dehydrated. We’ve run some tests but we’re sure you’re going to be just fine. I’m just going to get my colleague and then I’ll be right back.”

  “But what about Charles?” I shouted.

  Why was everyone avoiding answering my question? What had they done to him? This Doctor Phillips just looked at me, with pity in his eyes, shaking his head as he left the room. I heard movement from beside me and turned to see the captain staring at me.

  “Where am I?” I asked.

  “You’re in the hospital miss, gave me an awful fright when you collapsed. I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize.”

  “Didn’t realize what?”

  “Your injuries. I thought it was makeup, special effects. Once I realized you were really hurt we docked straight away and I brought you here.”

  “I don’t understand. Why would you think it was makeup?” I asked confused.

  None of this made any sense. My head was throbbing and my heart ached. All I wanted was to find Charles, bury him, say goodbye, and then hide away from the world and slowly wither away into nothing. I had nothing left to live for now anyway.

  “Miss, I told you, we’re part of a documentary reality show on pirates. We were supposed to hunt for treasure on the island in a couple of days and the men were checking it out, but found you instead. You were in such a state and then you collapsed so they brought you back to the ship. We assumed you were an actress and you’d just had a little too much sun.” He was shaking his head again. “I’m so sorry.”

  I didn’t know what to make of all of this. My mind was still very fuzzy but I did remember the beach and those men standing over Charles. I remembered coming out from behind the trees screaming at them to leave him alone. I looked down at my hands. They were knotted tightly into the blankets that covered me. I couldn’t stop the tears now as they fell from my cheeks. I looked up at this man and readied myself to ask the one question I was dreading.

  “What did they do with Charles? Did they bring him back to the ship too?”

  He looked at me with the same pity the doctor had shown, and gripped his chin. “There wasn’t anyone else on the beach. Who is this Charles you keep asking about?”

  “Charles, my husband.” I blurted out. “He was with me on the beach, your men, they saw him, they had his grandfather’s watch, and I jumped out, told them to leave him alone. They dragged me off his body.”

  I was shaking now, how could he not know what I was talking about. What the hell was going on here?

  “Miss, you must be confused, there was no-one else on that beach, I assure you.”

  I snapped then, turning to him like a wild animal. “WHAT DID YOU DO WITH MY HUSBAND?” I enunciated every word slowly but he just shook his head.

  “I’m sorry miss, there wasn’t anyone else on the beach.”

  “There was, Charles was there, he was…. he died in my arms.”

  I was sobbing now. Why was everyone lying to me? What was going on? Then I thought a little more. Perhaps those men didn’t tell him about Charles. It helped a little and I took a deep breath before looking up at him once more.

  “How far are we from the island?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “How far are we? I need to go back. I need to get Charles and bring him home. I can’t leave him out there.”

  “We’re not too far, but, I don’t think that’s a good idea. You’re not well. The doc said you’ll be here for a few days yet. They’re running tests. You have a nasty gash on your head and you were severely dehydrated. You’ll have to wait until you’ve been given the all clear before you can go anywhere.”

  “I have to get out of here,” I said as the door to my room opened.

  Dr. Phillips was back and this time he had another doctor with him.

  “This is Doctor Andrews, a colleague, and friend. He’d like to have a word with you,” he said motioning to the man at his side.

  I looked at both gentlemen. “Okay.”

  “John, do you mind leaving us. We won’t be long.” Dr. Phillips said to the captain who began moving towards the door.

  I was alone now with the two doctors and I had no idea what was going on.

  “Hello, there. I’m Doctor Andrews. Do you mind if I take a seat and we see if we can’t get to the bottom of all this?”

  He seemed nice and friendly. His hair was dark with gray patches around his temples. His eyes were soft and caring and I felt at ease. I nodded, giving my approval and he took the chair at the side of the bed.

  “How about we start with your name?” He said smiling politely at me. “It’s not filled in on the form,” he said shuffling through the papers in his hands.

  “Elizabeth, Elizabeth Parker,” I said.

  “Well Elizabeth, it’s very nice to meet you. My name’s Doctor Andrews but you can call me Mike.”

  I nodded once more. I wasn’t feeling as anxious or nervous about talking to this Dr. Mike fellow. He seemed relaxed and he wasn’t looking at me with eyes filled with pity like the other two men had.

  “How about you tell me how it was you came to be a patient here in my hospital?”

  He was holding a pen in his hand now, filling in the blanks on my hospital forms and probably getting ready to take notes.

  “I don’t really know,” I started. “The last thing I remember is being on the ship in the captain’s cabin and he was talking about cameras and I felt dizzy, and I was worried about Charles, and planning my escape, and then darkness, and I woke up here.”

  “That’s quite a lot of information, Elizabeth, do you mind if we go back a little bit. What happened before you came to be on the ship? Do you remember that?”

  I nodded, swallowing hard, and began to tell Dr. Andrews all about my wedding on board the Princess Elizabeth. Charles had named his yacht after me. I explained how we held our reception on the yacht with all our friends and Charles’ family. I told him about dancing and about how happy I was. He took notes while I spoke and glanced up every so often smiling and reassuring me. I felt at ease and I could feel my body beginning to relax for the first time since this ordeal began.

  “Do you mind if I stop you for a moment, Elizabeth? You mention friends and Charles’ family, but what about your own?”

  “Oh,” I frowned. “I don’t have any family; my parents were killed in a car accident five years ago. It’s just me now and Charles.”

  I could feel the tears filling my eyes but I refused to let them fall. I had to get through this story so that I could get out of here and find Charles. Dr. Andrews must have sensed my upset and decided to leave the questions about my family.

  “So Elizabeth, let’s go back to your wedding on the yacht. What happened after all your guests left? Do you think you can tell me about that?”

  I felt my shoulders relax as I took a deep breath and began again.

  “After our guests left Charles set a course for the island. We were going to spend our honeymoon there, just the two of us with no distractions.”

  “I see,
and were you or Charles drunk when you set course for the island?”

  “No, definitely not.”

  I was shocked that he would even ask such a question. Charles was a dedicated sailor there is no way he would risk such a thing.

  “Charles had to stay sober to sail the yacht, so he didn’t really have anything to drink, and I only had a glass or two of champagne. Why do you ask, do you think it was Charles’ fault that the yacht sank? He was an excellent sailor, there is no way he would have done anything to put us in danger.”

  I was shaking now and I could feel myself getting angry. How dare he suggest Charles caused this? Charles loved me, he loved his boat. He would never have intentionally done anything wrong.

  “I’m sorry, Elizabeth. I had to ask. Please go on. What happened next, tell me everything you remember?”

  I cast my mind back to that night, back to the quiet of the yacht after everyone had left and began to tell the doctor.

  “Charles and I had a glass of champagne to celebrate our future together. Then we sat and watched the sunset. Things get a little blurry after that.” I explained. “I remember a loud bang, and cold water and Charles screaming and dragging me. I remember swimming, and then waking up on the beach.”

  Dr. Andrews was nodding his head at me again. “Elizabeth you received a very nasty blow to your head, but I still need to ask you something. Did Charles open the bottle of champagne that you said you had after your guests left?”

  He was looking very serious now and I was getting worried.

  “No, the caterers left it open in our cabin when they were leaving. Why are you asking me all of this? What has it got to do with anything?”

  “We found drugs in your system, Ms. Parker, the type of drugs that would leave you with severe memory lapses. We need to determine where the drugs came from.”

  “Well, it wasn’t Charles.” I sobbed. “He loves me. We were going to spend the rest of our lives together.”

  I couldn’t take anymore. My tears flowed freely now and I placed my head in my hands. I could feel my shoulders shaking as my sobs took over. How could he, how could he possibly think Charles would do this to me. Not my Charles. He was the gentlest man you could ever meet. He was kind and caring. He would never hurt anyone, especially not me. He loved me.

  “I’m going to leave you for a while now. Let all the information I have just given you sink in. Hopefully, some additional memories will come back to you over the next couple of hours and we can get to the bottom of this mess.” Dr. Andrews said as he stood over my bed.

  “When can I leave?” I asked peering up at him.

  “You’ve been through quite an ordeal and it’s going to take time. We want to keep you in for observation but you should be free to go in a couple of days once your body has been fully rehydrated and your concussion clears. I’ll be back to check on you later. You should get some rest and try to eat something. Breakfast is being served now, I’ll get an attendant to bring you something.”

  He patted my hand and made his way out of the room. From the look on his face, I could tell he thought I was mad. I’d seen that look before. I knew how hospitals worked especially psychologists. I placed my head in my hands and let myself cry. I needed to. I had been holding it in for so long but I just couldn’t do it anymore. Charles’ face kept flashing in front of my eyes. My promise that I would wake him as soon as our rescue party arrived. I had broken my promise. I hadn’t woken him. I hadn’t tried hard enough. I should have woken him. I should have stayed by his side. It was all my fault that he was out there on that beach, alone. He needed me and I had to get back to him.

  Moments later I heard someone clear their throat. I looked up and it was the captain.

  Why was he still here? What did he want from me? Did he think I was mad too?

  I looked into his eyes but all I saw was compassion. He looked at me as if all he wanted to do was help.

  “Sorry to disturb you miss. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. The doc said you were upset.”

  “Why are you here?” I asked looking up at him. His eyes were so caring and I felt safe in his presence but I didn’t know what he wanted. I didn’t know why he had stayed with me while I was unconscious.

  “I couldn’t leave without knowing that you were okay. I feel terrible. I should have gotten you to the hospital sooner. But you see, I thought you were an actress. I’m so sorry.”

  He was shaking his head and I knew he was being sincere.

  “Do you know what happened to Charles?” I asked.

  “I’m afraid I don’t know who Charles is.” He said looking confused.

  So, I told him. I told him everything I could remember and he sat and he listened. He scratched his chin a few times and blew out a breath of air when I told him how I attacked the men on the beach when they took Charles’ watch. He waited until I had finished before he cleared his throat. He was looking at me now with such sadness in his eyes and I saw the pity there too. I couldn’t bear it. I turned my face away.

  “I really don’t know what’s going on here miss, but you need to know Charles wasn’t on that beach.”

  My head flew around and I met his eyes.

  “He wasn’t real. It was a dummy. That’s why we thought you were an actress.”

  I opened my mouth but nothing came out.

  A dummy. Not real. What did he mean?

  “No, you’re wrong. Charles was there. He was with me. He was breathing, and then….” I looked at this man, this captain, through my tears. “How could Charles be a dummy? I don’t understand.”

  The captain straightened in the chair.

  “It wasn’t a real body miss, that’s all I can tell you. I don’t know what happened to your husband or what kind or ordeal you’ve been through. All I can tell you is that you were the only person on that beach, besides the dummy. I swear it.”

  I was frantic now. My head was throbbing. My memories were missing, and the ones I did have weren’t real or so I was being told. I had to find Charles. I had to get to the bottom of this.

  “How far away from the island are we? Can you take me back there? I promise I’m not mad. Charles was with me and I need to find him.”

  I watched his eyes glaze over. I needed him to believe me but he was shaking his head.

  “I don’t know about this. You’ve had a dreadful shock miss, and the doctors said you could be here for a few more days.”

  “I don’t care what the doctors said.” I snapped. “And for god’s sake will you stop calling me miss. My name is Elizabeth.”

  He looked shocked at my outburst but he didn’t say anything so I continued with my rant.

  “I’m leaving this hospital now and going to that island whether you help me or not.” I started to get out of the bed. My legs were a little unsteady and I stumbled. He reached out and grabbed my arm.

  “Slow down miss, I mean Elizabeth. Let me help you.”

  I looked up at him. “Will you take me to the island? Will you help me find Charles?”

  “I know I’m going to regret this but I hate seeing a woman upset. I’ll help you in any way I can, but you have to listen to me and you have to let me help. Is that understood?”

  “I promise I will,” I said feeling a wave of relief wash over me. I was going back to the island. I was going to find my Charles.

  I looked up at his face, this man John who had just promised to help me. His eyes held such sorrow and pain when he looked at me.

  “Why are your helping me?”

  “You remind me of someone I used to know.” He said, his eyes glazing over as if caught in a memory.

  “Someone special?”

  “Very, my sister. She was treated here, in that very same bed.”

  “So that’s how the doctor knew you. I had wondered about that. What happened to her?”

  I was hoping I wasn’t pushing too far with my nosy questions, but there was just something niggling in the back of my mind.

  His shoulder
s slumped and I knew whatever it was, it was painful. I was about to tell him it didn’t matter when he started talking.

  “Susan was troubled. Delusions they said, split personality and so forth. She said someone was trying to kill her, someone evil. She was convinced but there was never any evidence. Doctors said it was all in her head. They kept her here for two months convinced her she was safe and that the medication they gave her would work.”

  He shook his head and lowered his eyes to the ground. “It didn’t work, two days after her release she was found dead.”

  “I’m so sorry, what happened to her?”

  “They ruled it as suicide but I just don’t know, maybe there was someone after her, maybe they waited. I just don’t know.”

  His grief and guilt were palpable and I could feel his pain.

  “But you believe me, don’t you? You believe that Charles was with me on that beach…I didn’t just imagine him.”

  “I don’t know whether to believe you or not, but I know one thing, and that is that I’ll make damn sure I find out one way or another.”

  With this final statement, we made our way to the door.

  “How are we going to get out of here?”

  “You leave that to me. I’ll talk to Doc Phillips; tell him we’ll be back in 24 hours. He owes me, it’s the least he can do. Now come on, we don’t have any time to waste.”

  CHARLES

  My head pounded as I pried my eyes open.

  “Ah, Charlie boy there you are. I was beginning to think I’d given you too much.”

  I turned my head towards the voice. My vision was out of focus and I could just make out a black shadow in front of me. I shook my head attempting to wake myself, clear my vision. It didn’t do much good. Laughter sounded around me. I tried to move my arms only to realize they were bound behind my back.

  “What the hell?”

  “Now, now Charlie boy, we’ve plenty of time for questions. Let’s wake you up first.”

  Without warning, water soaked my face and body, and quickly brought me back into full consciousness. I pulled my hands the rope or whatever was restraining me bit into my flesh and I felt the warm trickle of blood as it rolled down my wrists. I lashed out with my feet only to be greeted with the same sinister laughter. I looked up at my captor gritting my teeth as anger built. If this was some sick joke there’d be hell to pay.