I move forward and bring her mouth to mine. The kiss reminds me of the one we had shared before she transformed. Except this time there’s no eclipse, no blade. Only us. Real and together. No magic. Only love… if they are not in fact one and the same.
“I think we need to stop kissing. I want to know what Atlas’ letter says,” Callie reminds me of the letter. I don’t pout, not wanting to ruin the mood.
“Really. I’ve missed you… I could do this forever.”
“I know… I’m just…” She bites her lip. I realise I’m not getting them back until I’ve done as she’s asked.
“Okay. Okay,” I mutter, rolling my eyes. She’s so stubborn. Damn woman. I turn on the bed, propping myself up and finding the paper wedged between our intertwined tailfins. I slip my finger under the seal and pry the letter from inside. It’s on thick white parchment and my heart begins to palpitate as I see my father’s handwriting. Callie watches me as I read…
Son,
If you’re reading this letter, then I have failed. I have been waiting for so long, for the moment Saturnus will expose his true nature, but if you’re reading this, then it is up to you to finish what I could not. To explain, I never wanted you to be burdened with this fate, but I, as rulers so often are, have been put in an impossible position. You’re probably startled at the fact I’m reaching out to you at all, considering that if you’re reading this, then I haven’t been able to tell you myself and am long gone from this world, but it is beyond imperative that you read this letter, and take with you what I have to say. As usual, the fate of the world lies on our shoulders.
Saturnus, as you know, turned six months after I did. He was murdered by his father, a man who had two other sons. Their names were Solustus and Caedes. Their father was a brute, and it is therefore not surprising that the youngest among them is riddled with insanity, as he was left at the mercy of that man for years. Not everyone on our island was good, and it is probably my fault. I knew of the abuse within their family and yet I did not step in. I was too fearful of bringing the wrath of such a man down on your mother and your sisters, too. Saturnus loved a woman before his death, a woman who he planned to marry. His father didn’t want him to leave with her, and so he murdered him in cold blood, his own son. Saturnus was a sweet boy, an innocent who had been left at the hands of cruelty for longer than anyone should have to bear. When the Goddess opened her arms to him, he fell more deeply in love than anyone I have ever known. He was desperate for love, so desperate that merely being chosen was not enough. He wanted to have been her first pick, but that of course, was not his destiny, but mine. Saturnus stayed loyal to Atargatis for some fifteen years, pledging more hours to her worship than anyone I have ever seen.
Then one day, as our growing pod was travelling the Atlantic something changed. I did not know it at the time, but Solustus, newly made with the full power of Poseidon behind him, opened Saturnus’ eyes to power the likes of which he could not imagine. He told me of this man, of the brute strength and unimaginable power he possessed, born out of the rage of Poseidon, and I reminded him that Atargatis had given us all the power we needed. He agreed and we went on with our duties to the Goddess.
Over the next year I found him restless, an envy growing against my connection with Atargatis, she came to me in dreams and when I shared these things with you and the others, I could feel his anger stir. The dreams informed me of something called the conduit, which I will get to shortly. We parted ways for a while, each deciding to go and serve the Goddess on our own terms, but when he returned he was a different man. His aura was the only way I could be certain, it was the colour of coal, and corrupted. I knew he had given into the power of his brother. Solustus also tracked down his youngest brother after his madness drove him from our midst. Caedes began his underwater existence a mer, but soon Solustus infected him too. This making of two new Psirens was what I believe led Poseidon to strip Solustus of the majority of his power and create the Necrimad. Saturnus left our midst, and as our numbers grew, as you will remember, we became vulnerable, as moving in large numbers was less than discreet. Then, in 1725, after decades without being seen, Saturnus returned, bathed in what seemed to be glory of the Goddess. He told us he had a vision, of a city that was to be built in her honour at a very specific location in the pacific. This was to become the Occulta Mirum. It is my belief that during the years Saturnus was absent from our people, he was searching with his brother for the power Solustus had lost and believed rightfully belonged to him. That is why the city was placed where it was. It was built as a hold over the place where the Necrimad had been created, and banished to its dimensional prison. I knew Saturnus’ motives were corrupt but I could not call him out without looking as though I was power hungry or concerned of him taking my crown. I needed my people’s respect and trust if I was going to ever have the power to defeat such a beast as they want to raise. So I kept Saturnus close, made him my right hand and watched him closely as I could, waiting for him to reveal himself to our people as a Psiren. I protected you and your sisters as best I could and tried to outwit him at every turn. You must remember, Saturnus has been pulling strings from deep within the Occulta Mirum, so for every single move he made, I had to make two to diffuse whatever he was trying to set up. It worked well, but with the imminence of your soulmate’s arrival at this point, I sense change is coming upon us too quickly for me to act.
There is something else.
I am not giving you this information for information’s sake. I have kept many secrets, but perhaps the greatest is the existence of others like us all over the world. We are not alone. Nor have we ever been. While Saturnus and Solustus were off chasing down the Necrimad’s location, I was meeting with these clans and making alliances, guided by Atargatis to their places of origin. It’s now up to you to activate something called ‘the conduit’. The Goddess is not alone either. She belongs to a society of oceanic Gods and Goddesses. They call themselves the circle of eight and besides herself and her beloved there are three other couplets with forces dotted around the globe. You must find them to create the conduit, the failsafe that can decimate the Necrimad and the power within it. You must remember that Poseidon never intended to release such power into the world after seeing its destructive nature, and only the vilest of acts such as the sacrifice of innocence and the shedding of blood will prove the human race is in need of eradication and release it from its prison. I am hopeful that by the time this letter reaches you I will have sacrificed my life in order to stop its re-birth, but should it be among us, you will be in need of a failsafe. The conduit is that failsafe. It was put into place by the circle of eight, and is made up by eight vessels and their ‘pieces of eight’. I have been searching for the exact meanings for these terms for years, and have come up empty.
I am sorry I could not be of more use and I am sorry I am not there with you, but this is the most important thing I have ever asked of you. Without the conduit, without the help of others like us, this world, which we have both given so much to protect, will fall into ruin and darkness. We must now, more than ever, believe in the higher power that has kept us together for so long and hope that it will give you what you need to succeed.
I know you, son. I know you believe that you cannot rule. But I will tell you something, I once felt the very same, and it is not wanting the power of leadership that makes you so very qualified to wear the crown. Remember, I do not have, nor have ever had, all the answers. As a ruler all you can do is make choices and stand by them.
The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all.
All my love,
Your Father.
I look up from the paper and hand it over to Callie, my mouth still hanging open. He knew. The whole time. He knew about Saturnus. Oh my Goddess what has he gotten me into?
“You are not alone…” Callie reads aloud, half a mumble, half a gasp.
“What?”
“You are not alone. That’s what Atargatis s
aid to me. When I died!” She squeaks.
“Seriously?” I ask her and she nods, her pupils move to the upper left hand corner of her eye, like she’s physically trying to look back into her memory.
“Wait… she also said… oh God what was it. Something about corruption... Wait, yes. She said, ‘Even those most directly in the light of my love can be corrupted’… I think,” she looks at me with wide eyes.
“Saturnus,” I say his name like a curse.
“She was warning me all along,” she gasps. “We have to do this, Orion. We have to find the others… the others like me.”
“More vessels…” I say it, unable to conceive how large my world just became. There are others. We aren’t alone.
“Yes. I think I know…” She suddenly looks shy.
“You know what?”
“I don’t want to… we only just made up,” she looks away.
“Oh for Goddess’ sake, Callie. This is the fate of the world,” I remind her and she rolls her eyes.
“Fine, but you’re not going to like it,” she sighs. “When I saw Starlet’s sacrifice, before she died… well, she kissed Vex. I saw it through Azure’s vision. The funny thing was, the end of the vision switched perspective. And… well, I also kissed Vex…we sort of blew each other backwards, like magnets of the same polarity or something…” I narrow my eyes.
“If you’re about to tell me he’s a vessel then the world is doomed,” I warn her.
“I think he’s a vessel,” she confirms my fears. It would make sense. “He took away my darkness.” She reiterates, as though she needs to convince me.
“I don’t care if he’s Poseidon himself, I want him dead,” I growl.
“It’s not his fault I slept with him. It was my choice. It’s not like he tricked me into it.”
“Show me,” I demand. Irritated.
“What?”
“We can share memories. Show me!” She lets out a laugh. I don’t get what’s so funny.
“Oh my God, do you not see the irony here? I begged you to show me the other women you’d slept with before, you said you didn’t want to hurt me! What makes you think I want to cause you anymore pain than I already have?” She asks me. She does have a point.
“Okay… if I show you the other women I’ve slept with, will you show me what happened with you and Vex?”
“Like pulling off a band-aid or something?”
“Yes. I guess you could put it like that. I want us to start fresh. Things are so different now. I don’t want us to spend any more time apart. Life’s too short.” I laugh as Callie rolls her eyes at this.
“It’s true, being immortal doesn’t make you as un-killable as I’d thought,” she admits with a sad smile. I stroke down her shoulder. I know she and Starlet didn’t really get on, but Starlet had believed in her. She knew she’d make a great ruler. I guess it’s time I start putting in the effort to make things work. Even if it’s against my better judgement. I need to know what she had with Vex.
“Okay. Here,” I place my hands on either sides of her skull and she inhales slightly. Her mouth goes slack, and I close my eyes, concentrating on the past I had long since forgotten. Once I’m done. She opens her eyes.
“Oh my God… you were so lonely,” she looks like she might cry.
“Hey no tears, you said you could handle it.” She nods, biting down on her lip. I cup her cheek and she holds onto my hand. Hers are so tiny in comparison.
“I know, it’s just not what I expected. I thought I’d feel jealousy… but it’s nothing like what we have. It’s not even close. You were so… lonely.” I nod, this is most certainly true.
“I know. It’s over now, so no use getting upset. Now it’s your turn.” She sighs, almost as though she’s unsatisfied. I wonder if she had expected to see me loving someone else, married with children. How wrong she was. It was just skin. Just bodies. For me, my soul, there would only ever be one other.
“Okay. Don’t flip out?” She looks at me sternly.
“Okay,” I vow, not sure how I’ll remain calm, but hoping I can manage it.
“Promise?” She isn’t satisfied.
“I promise,” I vow once more, rolling my eyes. She frowns, twisting her mouth into that cute pucker again, but before I can laugh she’s got her fingers on my temples.
Once the memories have passed between us I want to scream. Not because I’m jealous, or hurt. But because I’m angry. He left her. He left her naked and vulnerable. He treated her body with vile disposure, like it was nothing more than something to be tried on and discarded. He hadn’t given pleasure willingly; it wasn’t about her. It was about him. His needs. His pleasure. He’d had her on her goddamn knees for Goddess’ sake. Red mist creeps across my field of vision, mingling in with grief. Suddenly I feel her hand on the back of my neck.
“Orion, you’re shaking. Breathe,” she reminds me. I exhale, letting the rage simmer lightly beneath the surface.
“I’m sorry. I don’t care if he is the vessel. I’m going to kill that bastard for what he did to you. He’s no better than Daryl!” Callie hushes me.
“No. You won’t. I’ve already had it out with him. I broke his nose.” I turn to her, stunned. I sort of love her a little bit more in this moment.
“I’ll still be murdering him. But it’s nice to know he has a crooked snout,” I joke, relaxing my shoulders.
“I feel better,” she smiles, leaning over and kissing me on the cheek. I can still feel the murderous tendencies crawling within my muscles, longing them to smash and crush. But they can wait. For now.
“Me too. I think we need to go and talk to Gideon about this. He’ll want to know. We also need to go about finding the vessel for Sedna. I’m assuming it’ll be one of the Adaro. I guess that makes as much sense as any of this does,” I exhale. She smiles.
“How are we ever going to convince them to fight for us?” Callie asks me the question, it’s a good one, I’ll give her that. However, I think I have the answer.
“Azure. The vessel will be able to absorb her visions. I think that should do the trick,” I reveal.
“But we can’t get near her,” she reminds me. I sigh.
“I know. I have a little family reunion to attend beforehand.” I don’t want to go near her, but I know I’m responsible for her. After everything, she’s the only family I have left.
AZURE
My internals are cold, slimy, and red. I can feel them squirming beneath my skin like worms, trying to get out. I feel nauseous. Like spewing my guts up will bring her back. Or at least end my suffering.
I slam my fist against the ice wall, watching my knuckles shatter, blood spattering in archaic fireworks, exploding onto white. It’s no use. No matter how many layers I punch through, Gideon just keeps making more. I’ve been watching him pace, swimming lengths and adding layers where I’ve thinned my prison. That is until his martyr extraordinaire of a daughter shows up and starts talking in her high-pitched harpy tones again. I bang my skull against the hardness of the frozen walls, smashing bone against ice. It doesn’t knock me out. The darkness has come and I can’t rein it in. I can’t even knock myself out, I’m too strong, strengthened by the hate, the loss… the grief. I scream out again, deafening myself with echoes of my own agony. I want to rip it all to pieces, shred and tear and bite and cut until there’s nothing left of me. Muffled voices spike the adrenaline within my veins. I push my ear to the thick ice, listening in as my breath comes quick and shallow. It’s him.
“Let me in. I need to see her.”
“What if she tries to kill you again, Your Highness?”
“Well, I’m assuming you two will actually do your jobs this time. Am I correct in that assumption?” He’s talking to Ghazi and Cole. Weaklings.
“Yes, Sir.”
“Drop the wall,” he commands. Like he has any actual authority? Such a pathetic excuse for a ruler, for a brother. He deserves to be the one flayed and exsanguinated.
I hear Gideon let ou
t a sigh. Cracking… like the breaking of bones reaches inward toward me. I move backward, readying myself. Chunks of ice fall away slowly. I wait… biding my time. Orion takes a long tailfin stroke backward.
“Get ready, Sire.”
“I got it.” I hear them talking at me, like I’m an animal that needs to be contained… well, right they are. I clench my fists, tensing each individual muscle in my body, winding it tighter and tighter, ready to release my rage like a spinning top. Whirling around like a wicked edge, ripping them all limb from limb. I am about to move as the ice clears, the last of it falling away. I clench my teeth and just as I’m about to launch forward Orion catches me off guard. Never one to use his powers unless he absolutely has to, he’s actually pre-emptive of my assault. He uses the water surrounding my body and his power over air to catch me in a new prison. But this time it’s not one I can hit. The ball of water continues to spin, swirl. I can see him, his familial blue eyes blinking in through the blur of the moving water. He looks too much like her. No.
“LET ME OUT!” I scream.
“No, not until I’ve said my piece.”
I let out an ear-piercing screech, wailing, trying to get him to drop his guard for just a second.
“Azure. You can scream and punch and wail all you like. I’m not leaving this place without you. I’m your only family. I’m the only one left who cares about you. I know you; I know you self-destruct when you’re hurting. It is my fault. I know that. I know it’s my fault Starlet is dead…” he pauses, I wonder if he’s crying, so human. Ugh.
“I will never forgive myself for what has happened to her. I don’t expect you to forgive me either. But I also won’t ever forgive myself if I don’t save you from yourself. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever known. I know you can beat the darkness.”
The Kiss That Saved Me (The Tidal Kiss Trilogy Book 2) Page 42
