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by Denise Grover Swank


  The veins on Reece’s neck bulge, but he remains silent.

  I take that as a positive sign. “We’re stuck out here and we have help at our disposal. I suspect Jo’s street smarts are going to be the deciding factor in whether we survive or not.” My head swings between the two of them. “But we have no chance if we’re divided. We live together or die alone. If we are going to survive then we need to try to get along.”

  “Fine.” They say in harmony, both in grudging tones.

  Despite my speech, I’m surprised I’ve swayed them. I blink, then try to maintain my stern tone. “Good, now we need to figure out what to do with Evan. We’ll need to stash him somewhere in Section Three. He won’t survive very long in Section Two, will he? Even with radiation tablets?”

  Evan rests his head against the truck, relief on his face that I’ve agreed to leave him behind. “No,” he says in a heavy breath. “I won’t survive.” And for a moment, I’m sure he’s going to suggest he stay there anyway. But then he knows he’s lucky that I’m agreeing to his hiding in Section Three. No sense pushing it.

  “So we stash him and the truck somewhere then we’ll spend the night and head to Deacon City first thing tomorrow.”

  “Who made you the boss?” Reece asks.

  “You got a better idea?” I counter. “Because if you do, I’m all ears.”

  Jo laughs. “I think I might like you yet, Chipper.”

  Chapter Six

  I feel like I’m in a zombie movie as Reece creeps through the deserted suburban neighborhood. I expect rotting corpses to start shuffling down the street at any moment. Instead, the corpses I see are skeletal remains propped against buildings or laying in yards. Bile rose in my throat with the first dozen or so we passed, but I’ve become acclimated to them now. They no longer have the shock value they had fifteen minutes ago.

  I cast a glance to Jo. She watches out the passenger window with a look of nonchalance. Judging by the way she blew up the bandits, with no discernible remorse, I’m sure she’s seen more dead bodies than any person should be subjected to.

  I wonder how long it will take until I’m hardened like her. I hope I’m not around long enough to find out. General Ghertner’s face flashes in my mind, the momentary surprise when I shot him in the forehead. No. No guilt. I did it because I had to. I did it to save Reece. But I suspect Jo justifies death too. Maybe I’m already more like her than I realize.

  For a brief moment, I allow myself to consider what my future holds. We’ve spent the last three days running for our lives. It’s taken all of our energy and focus. When I jumped out of the portal that would have taken me to my world, I did it because I couldn’t bear to leave Evan and Reece in danger. But have I put them in more danger? No. If I hadn’t stayed behind they would be dead. General Ghertner would have killed them.

  Evan insists that Reece’s mother might be able help me get home, but there’s no denying that the portal to my world is in the middle of the curve on the road by the stone church, headed out of Springfield. The closer we get to Kansas City, the farther away we are from the portal. Not that it would do me any good, even if the military weren’t guarding the space. The only black box in existence that connects the two universes was sent into my world when I jumped out of the vortex.

  There’s no way back home.

  I know I should feel more grief over this, but life back in my world is becoming more and more of a distant memory as the reality of this world takes precedence. Or maybe I’m too busy trying to survive to dwell on what I’ve lost.

  Or maybe the memories of this world’s Julia are beginning to push mine out.

  I gasp. Reece shoots me a questioning look, then returns his gaze to the road.

  Are my memories becoming replaced by hers? I do a mental inventory and come up with only my own recollections, which helps me calm down. The instances of her memories crossing over have been a fluke, residual effects from our accident. Or maybe I’m imagining things, which I quickly disregard. There’s no denying I know things from her life I shouldn’t know.

  But in my search, I find the hum of something foreign in the background of my consciousness. I close my eyes, poking around the edges until a memory bleeds through of a little boy with bright blue eyes and wavy black hair, watching me from across a classroom.

  I know instantly that it’s Evan, from this world. His eyes are too brilliant, and the Evan from my world never looked at me with such fondness.

  There’s no denying that her memories are in my head, but what can I do about it? I need to tell Evan and now is the worst possible time. I need to focus on getting Evan antibiotics. I need to think about crossing this wasteland to the West Coast to find Reece’s mother. Dealing with the threat in my head is just one too many things to worry about. I’m perfectly sane right now. I just need to figure out how to stay that way.

  Taking a deep breath, I push my panic away and consider the possibility that I will never go home. My mother may never know what happened to me. That’s what bothers me the most. That my mother and sister will think I ran away from them and not realize I ran away to Monica.

  Not that finding Monica did me any good. The Monica of this world is nothing like the best friend I knew. Evan is nothing like the boy back home. Reece’s new pastime is telling me that I’m nothing like his Julia.

  Leave it to me to be a disappointment in two universes. I’m just as alone here as I was back home, but I remind myself that’s not true. I have Evan.

  Evan. He may have come to my world hoping to find his Julia, but he gave me hope when I had none, and he gave me a reason to go on. I may have thought I followed him to see Monica again, but the reality is that I came with him because I couldn’t bear to lose him.

  And I might lose him anyway.

  He accepts me as I am and no longer looks for the girl he loved. It’s more than Reece gives me. I owe Evan my life and I’ll do everything in my power to make sure he gets better.

  Tears burn my eyes, and I blink them away before Reece or Jo notice. They are the strong members of our ragtag troupe, and I suspect they won’t take pity on the weak.

  So where does that leave Evan?

  I’m being ridiculous. Reece is Evan’s best friend—or he was, until they fought over their Julia. They reunited only because Evan convinced Reece that I existed in another universe, and Reece agreed to help Evan cross, hoping to get answers about his Julia’s feelings. Instead they got me.

  But while they have semi-reconciled, the foundation of their new relationship is shaky at best. I’ve always heard that putting someone in a dangerous situation will show a person’s true colors. I hope I like what I see when we’re done.

  “There.” Jo points ahead. “That looks like a good place.”

  I study the older house on the street corner, surrounded by newer ranch homes. It looks lost and out of place. Kind of like us. But I see what’s grabbed Jo’s attention. The property includes a storage shed in the back with large sliding doors. We might be able to fit the truck inside.

  Reece pulls into the yard and inches toward the shed before he stops. Jo and I climb out and examine the doors. There’s nothing holding them shut, but I see a rusted padlock lying on the hard packed dirt.

  “I think the truck will fit through the opening and into the building, but what’s to keep the looters out?”

  Jo spins around, sweeping her arm as she points. “All the busted doors. See?”

  Most of the house’s doors are either open or completely gone.

  “This section has been picked over pretty thoroughly. It’s on the edge so scavengers hit it first. Until they started getting radiation sickness. But they risked it anyway. Believe it or not, the sections closer to the blast site are the hot spots now.”

  “Literally,” Reece mumbles.

  Jo ignores him. “We should be safe here.”

  I look back at her. “Should be?”

  “No place out here is one hundred percent safe. As long as we make sure th
at we take our radiation tablets, this is one of the safest places we can be.”

  “She’s right.” Evan limps toward us, the Geiger counter in his hand. “The radiation levels are high, but we should be okay as long as we take our meds and don’t stick around too long.”

  I wrap my arms around myself and shiver. “How far are we from the toll bridge?”

  Reece looks down at his digital tablet. “About eight miles.”

  My stomach falls. I’d hoped we could find a way to bring Evan, so we’d all be together, but there’s no way Evan can walk eight miles. And there’s no way we can carry him. I look Reece in the eye. “So the plan is to leave first thing in the morning?”

  Reece turns to Jo. “Does the toll bridge have hours?”

  She shakes her head. “It’s open all the time. It’s often busier at night.”

  Reece purses his lips. “I think we should go now. That should put us there around sundown.”

  “No!” I shout, stepping toward Reece. I need more time to sway Evan to my reasoning. “The plan is to leave tomorrow. I thought you wanted to ditch the military, so hiding out here seems like the smarter thing to do. Who knows what you’ll find in the underground city? What if things go wrong and we have to leave Kansas City right away? We’ll still have to deal with the military. Staying here buys us an extra day of hiding.”

  Reece’s voice lowers. “Jules, I know I said that, but now I think it would be best to go ahead and get this done. Besides—” He casts a quick look at Evan, then his eyes find mine. “Evan needs the medicine as soon as possible.”

  His words make sense, but it makes my position more difficult. “You’re right.”

  The corner of his mouth lifts. “I think I’m hearing things. I could have sworn you just said I was right.”

  I laugh and swat his chest with my hand, but he pulls me into a tight hug, burying his face into my shoulder. I close my eyes and remember the night I had a nightmare in his bed and he comforted me with a hug. This is the Reece that pulls at my heart.

  “I know you’re scared,” he whispers in my ear. “I’m scared too, but we can do this, and we’ll get Evan antibiotics, okay?” He leans back and looks into my eyes. “I didn’t mean it before. About you not being like the Julia here. I’m sorry.”

  “You did, but that’s okay. I’m not her. I’ve told you that all along.”

  He nods, and I see an emotion I can’t name in his eyes.

  Jo clears her throat. “Um…this is beautiful and all, but we still have work to do.”

  Reece drops his arms, and I glance at Evan to see he’s looking away. Does he think Reece and I were having a tender moment? I suppose we were, but not in the way he thinks.

  Reece rubs the back of his neck. “Let’s stash the truck, then figure out what we’re going to take to barter.” He looks back at the house. “Julia, why don’t you and Evan head inside and figure out where he can hide.”

  “It makes more sense for me to stay with the truck, Reece.” Evan stands taller to exert his authority, but his sickly complexion destroys the illusion.

  With a slight tilt of his head, Reece’s eyes lock on Evan’s. “No, it makes more sense for you to go inside the house where you’ll have some light and be warmer.”

  “I need to be out here if someone tries to take the truck.”

  “The shape you’re in, you’ll get yourself killed if someone comes to take the truck.”

  I gasp at Reece’s bluntness, but I also know what he’s doing, even if he hurts Evan in the process. “Evan, you’re more important than the truck.”

  “We have nothing if we don’t have the truck.”

  Jo shifts her weight. “I’ll set up some kind of alarm, so if someone gets in, it’ll alert you that they’re here. Then you can just take them out through a window.”

  My eyes widen. “Shoot them?”

  Her nose wrinkles. “Of course shoot them. Survival of the fittest.”

  Evan sighs. “I’m not sure that’s what Charles Darwin had in mind. But I suppose it will work.”

  I bite my tongue. What have we become that we talk of killing people with such a cavalier attitude? I can hardly live knowing I shot the general. I sure don’t want to shoot anyone else. I try to appease myself with the knowledge that Evan has agreed to stay in the house. “I’m not going.”

  Reece and Jo are struggling to get the doors open and stop mid-push.

  Evan’s head jerks up and anger flashes in his eyes. “Yes, you are. You and I already had this discussion.”

  “You had this discussion. I merely listened and never agreed. You need someone to help watch over the truck.”

  Evan’s face reddens, and it’s not from his fever. “You were the one who came up with the plan while we were overlooking the city. Everyone agreed. Even you.”

  I spread my feet apart, not willing to back down. “I came up with the plan, but I never said I was going into the city, and I never agreed to leave you behind.”

  Evan shakes his head. “Reece, talk some sense into her.”

  “Maybe she should stay here.”

  Tilting back his head, Evan releases a guttural sound. “I am not a child that needs to be watched.”

  Emboldened by Reece’s support, I push forward. “No, but you’re sick. You shouldn’t be alone. Besides, you know how cold I get. My jacket will never keep me warm enough. I’ll whine the entire way there and back.”

  “You don’t whine, Julia. You had every reason to whine weeks ago, and you never did. Not once.”

  “Let’s just say what this is really about.” Jo puts her hands on her hips and glares at Reece. “You don’t trust the new girl.”

  “You haven’t exactly tried to endear yourself to us,” Reece counters.

  “What do you think I’m going to do? Stab you in your sleep?”

  Reece’s upper lip twists into a snarl. “The thought occurred to me.”

  Jo’s anger billows and she juts out her hip. “Well, I’m not going anywhere alone with him. Who knows what he’ll do. I’m worried about my virtue.”

  If the situation weren’t so dire, I’d burst out laughing. Instead, I want to cry.

  “Either Chipper goes, or I don’t.”

  Both boys wait for my answer. There’s no decision really. Jo won’t change her mind, and she knows that I’ll go to save Evan. She has something up her sleeve, but I have no idea what it could be. And that scares me.

  “Fine.” But I’m already worried. Evan’s right, I won’t complain about the cold, but I’ll be miserable. I tell myself that eight miles is nothing. I’m used to walking two miles home from school every day.

  I take two steps toward Evan and slip my arms inside his coat and around his back, burying my face into his chest. He wraps his jacket around me, but remains stiff.

  “Evan, what happened with Reece a minute ago…that was nothing. He knows how upset I am about you and wanted to reassure me.”

  He relaxes a little and my arms tighten.

  “I don’t want to leave you, but if I don’t go, Jo won’t take Reece to the underground city. Maybe I should leave Reece here with you. I’m sure she’ll agree to that.”

  “No!” He grabs my arm and pulls me to the back of the truck, grimacing with every step. When we round the corner, he grasps my shoulders and bends down to make his face level with mine. “I agree that Jo is a valuable resource. We could stumble around out here for weeks and never find what she can show us. But she’s up to something. I hope to God she’s not taking you into a trap. I’m not sure it’s worth you and Reece risking your lives to get me medicine.”

  My back stiffens. “We’re going to Deacon City whether you like it or not, Evan. I refuse to sit here and watch you get sicker and sicker. I don’t want to leave you, but I’ll do it if it’s the only way to help you get better.”

  A soft smile lights up his eyes. “I know, and I love that about you. But you can’t go alone with her. Both you and Reece need to go. If you run into any trouble, ta
ke off running back here. Reece will be able to handle things on his end, just get out of there.”

  “I’m not going to desert Reece.”

  “Reece can handle himself, and he wants you to be safe. Otherwise he wouldn’t have suggested you stay behind to watch me. I know him. He’s worried about what awaits you guys in the city. He doesn’t trust her either, but he knows that she’s our best shot at this.”

  “I don’t want to leave you alone, Evan. What if we’re gone for a day or more? You need someone to watch over you.”

  “Jules, I’m fine.” Evan begins to slip off his coat. “I want you to take this.”

  I take a step back. “No way. You know that house is freezing. And you have a fever.”

  “I’ll wrap up in blankets. I’ll be fine.”

  “I’ll be walking. My body heat will keep me warm.”

  “Julia.” Reece has walked up next to us. “You need his coat. We’ll find the warmest spot in the house and we’ll make sure he’s set up with blankets. But you’ll freeze out there if you’re not bundled up.”

  “Chipper, just take the damn coat already.”

  My frustration and fury boil, burning me from the inside out. Jo’s the reason I’m in this situation. If it weren’t for her, I could be sitting in the house with Evan, making sure he gets enough water, and that he’s not too cold. I want to rage at her but I can’t. If I piss her off too much, she might leave us. I’m stuck.

  I snatch Evan’s coat from his hand and stuff my arms inside the sleeves. The coat is way too big. But it’s not like most people can be picky out here. I suspect I’m not the only person wearing ill-fitting clothes. “I’m not leaving until I see where Evan is staying and know he’ll be safe and warm.” Without waiting for a response, I take up my usual spot under Evan’s arm and help him limp into the house while Reece leads the way, carrying a stack of blankets.

  I have no idea what we’ll find inside the house, but I don’t expect to it to be completely empty. Every piece of furniture, every picture on the wall, every single item in the house is gone.

 

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