“Me too, but if we’ve learned nothing else from our past experiences, it’s that we have to have a backup plan. So if we get caught, I’ll convince them that the three of you had nothing to do with it.”
“I brought the radio to you. They’ll know I was part of it.”
He pulls me back and shakes his head, his face tight with determination. “No, if we go with the second option, I’ll make you part of the bargain.”
“What bargain?”
“When we go back, I’ll hide the box, and we’ll try to find Reece and Jo. But if we get caught, and only when I’m sure that the three of you are safe, I’ll tell them where it is.”
I cover my face with my hands, all my happiness evaporating. Evan is right. This was the answer to everything. We got away. But at what cost? I wrap my arms around his back and squeeze. “You said you’d bargain to save the rest of us. What about you?”
He remains silent.
“Evan?”
“They’ll see me a traitor, no matter what. The best I can hope for is to save you three.”
I shake my head. “No. I won’t do it.”
“Yes, you will. You’ll never be able to live with yourself if we don’t go back. That’s one of the reasons I love you. But the reality is that there’s a good chance we’ll get caught. We need to be prepared.”
“Then all of this was pointless.” I stand, my anger and frustration boiling. “We did this to save us, but we didn’t save us at all.”
He gets to his feet and takes my hand. “How can this be pointless? I never thought I’d stand in the sun again without getting burned. Or smell flowers and grass and trees. Or be with you somewhere so completely safe I can spend precious moments with you and not worry for your life.” Pain chisels his face. “Sometimes there’s no such thing as a happy ending, Jules. Sometimes there’s only what you get, snatches of moments.” His eyes plead with mine. “God help me, but I’ll never be sorry for coming to you in your universe. I’ll probably burn in hell for that, for the pain I’ve put you through and the danger I’ve put you in. But I’d rather have a few extraordinary moments instead of a lifetime of ordinary.”
A lump burns in my throat as I cling to his hand. “I’m not sorry. I’ll never be sorry you found me. You saved me, Evan.”
He shakes his head. “You would have found your way out of your sadness.”
“Don’t save me this time.” I whisper.
His eyes widen. “What are you talking about?”
“What will happen to you if we get caught? The truth?”
His face hardens. “I’ll be found guilty of treason and put to death.”
I take his other hand in mine. “Then let me be found guilty too.”
“No!” He tries to pull away, but I hold tight.
“You said that there are no happy endings, Evan. Maybe you’re right. Even if I’m not found guilty, what will happen to me? I’ll be stuck in your universe, left to live my life without you. But if I’m there, I’ll lose my own memories, and I’ll become the Julia of your world. I’ll no longer be me. So I’ll be dead anyway. Don’t you see?”
Tears and terror fill his eyes.
“Even if you’re dead, you know it’s only a matter of time before they figure out how to get to my world. If I make it back to my world, I won’t be safe there, and I can’t bear the thought of seeing it happen and knowing I was a part of it.”
“I’m sorry.”
I release his hands and reach around the back of his neck. “It’s okay.” I brush his cheeks with my fingertips, then stand on my tiptoes until our faces are inches apart. “I’d rather have a few snatches of moments of extraordinary with you than a lifetime of ordinary.”
His lips crush mine and he kisses me in a frenzy of fear and regret. His hands slide under my shirt, skimming my back and pulling me closer.
“We can go back,” I say through my tears, “but let me have time with you here. Please.”
His eyes are alight with love. “I’ll give you anything, Jules. You only have to ask.”
We spend the afternoon in the field, in each other’s arms. Whatever Evan’s done to the box has reduced our need for sleep to only a couple of hours. As I doze off and on, I realize the presence in my head is completely gone. All of the other Julia’s memories have fled.
I sit in amazement. “They’re gone.”
He sits up beside me, rubbing my back. “What’s gone?”
“Her memories. Julia’s memories are gone.”
He grabs my arms and turns me to face him, cautious excitement on his face. “Are you sure?”
Nodding, I smile like an idiot. “You were right, Evan.”
Some of his happiness fades. “But is it permanent or will they return when we go back?”
I obviously don’t know the answer to that question. We’ll find out soon. I’m sure we’re safe to go back since we’re no longer tired, but Evan waits until I say I’m ready, holding the transistor radio in his free hand.
I take it from him, turning it over. “I still can’t believe you made this out here with nothing but parts.”
“I was determined to save you.”
“But you needed tools… and schematics.”
He grins. “The schematics are in my head.” He taps his temple. “And I told you that I had some tools and some spare parts in my pack.” He squeezes my shoulder, drawing me closer.
Even though our situation seems hopeless, I’m still looking for a way out. “Maybe we can get Reece and Jo and then travel back here with the four of us.”
He takes the device from me and stares at it. “There’s only enough energy left for one more trip. Our trip back.”
I push up on an elbow. “Then we’ll get another energy source.”
His eyes swim with pity. “It’s not that easy, Jules.”
“I’m not ready to just give up, Evan. Especially after today. You’re worth fighting for. Aren’t I?”
Pain flickers in his eyes before he sets the radio down and cups my head, his thumb caressing my cheek. “Of course you are. Don’t accuse me of giving up on you.”
“Then fight for us.”
He releases a tiny laugh. “You’re a tenacious thing, aren’t you?”
“You have no idea.” I grin from my small victory. “What do we need to do?”
He sighs and lies on his back, leaning on his elbow. “It will probably be in their science labs. It’s a highly compacted energy source that your world doesn’t have.”
“Like batteries.”
He grins. “Just like batteries, only much more powerful and smaller. Like a watch battery. We’ll need four.”
“So we get the batteries, find the box and replace the old ones. Then we find a way for the four of us to be together and turn on the box?”
Evan grimaces. “Only it won’t be that easy. Not even close.” He looks into the cloudless blue sky. “Reece may not want to leave. And we run the risk of exposing our plan if we try to include him.”
“Jo,” I murmur. “She can help us find the batteries.”
Evan’s eyebrow rises.
“She’s a scavenger. This is what she does best, and she has nothing to keep her there.”
“That still doesn’t solve the Reece issue.”
I’m not sure Reece wants to leave, and if he doesn’t, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want me to leave either. Is it fair to take him with us if he doesn’t want to go? Is it fair to leave him out in case he doesn’t and might turn us in? Evan still doesn’t know Reece’s hopes. Should I tell him? I can only imagine how angry he would be, and I decide to keep it to myself for now. “So we’ll go back, find where Jo and Reece are being held, and convince them to come with us.”
“If Reece doesn’t want to come, he won’t turn us in.”
I’m not so certain. He might turn us in to keep me with him.
Evan takes my hand. “Jules, you need to know that breaking in, finding Reece and Jo, trying to steal the batteries, then traveling back here is a long
shot. If they catch us, then they’ll lock up both of us and possibly execute us. If we go back, turn ourselves in and try to bargain for the device, we might have a shot at saving you.”
It goes against every instinct in my body. The only way to save Evan is to try to find the batteries. It’s worth the risk. “No. We’re not turning ourselves in.”
“Then we need fallback plans.” His words are breathless as though he knows I won’t like what’s next.
“Okay,” I say hesitantly.
“When we get back, we’ll hide the box as insurance. If we get caught, I’ll tell them you didn’t even know what you had. That I asked you to bring it to me, and I forced you to come with me. I’ll tell them where the box is hidden as long as I know you and the other two are safe.”
“Evan, no.”
“But they might not mess with me, Jules. Especially if they think you know where it is. They might execute me immediately to scare you into giving it to them.”
My heart lurches. “No.”
“It’s a possibility and we need to make a plan for it.”
My voice breaks. “And what do you propose?”
“Tell them you’ll give it to them if they promise to send you home, and don’t charge Jo or Reece.”
“And if they don’t agree?”
“I’ll leave that up to you to decide.”
I try to swallow the lump of fear in my throat.
Evan gives me a moment before he continues. “Let’s say I’m imprisoned and you get the battery. Then get the radio and come to my cell. Use force if you have to because you know that they will too.”
I nod.
“Then when we’re all together, we’ll travel here and start our new lives.” He smiles but it’s sad.
“Piece of cake,” I say with as much enthusiasm as I can muster.
“Piece of cake,” Evan parrots, but his words lack conviction.
I grab his hand and squeeze. “I’m not giving up on you, Evan Whittaker.”
He smiles, but it’s full of sadness and regret. “I wish we’d had more happy moments like this. Enough to make up a lifetime.”
“We’re just starting our lifetime.” The fierceness of my declaration strains my words.
He laughs. “If anyone can make that happen, I’m sure it’s you.”
“You’re damn straight.”
He pulls me to my feet. “We need to find a place inside their compound to go back to, yet not pop into a room full of officials or guards.” He leads me to a spot in the trampled field, places his hands on my shoulders, and turns me to face the lowering sun. “This is about where we stood in my cell. You’re the one who’s walked around the compound and knows where things are. I’ll stand behind you while you start walking out of my cell into the compound and you’ll determine where we end up.”
“Me?”
His fingers massage my stiff shoulders. “Yes, you. You can do this.”
But I’m not sure I can get us out of the cell and into a free space in the compound, let alone somewhere private.
“Keep your eyes closed. The field will distract and disorient you.”
Taking a deep breath, I take my first steps, talking out my reasoning. “It’s about ten steps to the door. Then we turn right.”
I begin to move and Evan follows, still holding onto my shoulders. “That’s good, Jules. Now where?”
I squeeze my eyes shut as I concentrate, picturing the hallway in my mind. “About twenty feet and then we turned left.”
We continue this process until we stop outside of what I’m fairly sure is the apartment I share with Reece and Jo, but then again, I could be completely off. I never counted the steps before. “I’m not sure where to go.”
“Maybe we could try for the room they first brought us to. It’s wide and open.”
“I have no idea how to get there.” Panic wells in my chest. “I never came to the apartment from there.”
Evan’s hand kneads my shoulders and back. “It’s okay. We’ll figure out something else.”
“We could go inside our apartment, in my room.”
“The chances of actually ending up there are pretty slim. And we have to hope that we don’t appear inside a wall.”
I suck in a breath.
“We’ll probably be okay. The vortex will fling us anyway.”
“Probably?”
“It’s the best we can do other than leaving the compound completely. We might never get back in.”
I exhale in frustration. “Apartment it is.” I position us to where I think the bedroom I share with Jo is and open my eyes.
The sun is setting over the mountaintop in front of me, casting a rosy glow. I turn and look into Evan’s eyes. This is one of the moments he talks about, the ones we’ll cherish for the rest of our lives. However long or short that is.
“Ready?” he asks, the box in his hand.
I’ll never be ready to give this moment up, but I have no choice. “Yes.”
He smiles and gives me a kiss. “We’ll be back in this valley before you know it.”
I take one last look at the field as the vortex spins and the air around me ripples.
I know in my heart that I will never be back here.
Chapter Twenty-Two
I end up smashed against metal shelves as I fight for my first breath. Evan is several feet from me, unmoving.
I’m determined to get myself together sooner this time. What if someone discovers us here? My lungs pull, forcing my diaphragm down, and oxygen rushes through my airway. After several breaths, I crawl to Evan.
He inhales when he sees me, relief washing over his face. After several seconds we can both sit up after we regain control of our motor skills.
He glances around the room. “This doesn’t look like an apartment.”
He’s right. We seem to be in a storage room. “Maybe they keep batteries in here.” Could we finally get some luck on our side?
His mouth twists. “I doubt they would keep them somewhere like this. They’re explosive.”
My eyebrow quirks. “And you just now thought to tell me this?”
He shrugs, then gets to his feet and grabs my hand to help me up. “I’m having second thoughts. You can find Jo and Reece, and I’ll turn myself in to distract them. Then the three of you can escape.”
I drop his hand and start looking through the supplies.
Evan’s eyes narrow. “What are you looking for?”
“I don’t know. Anything to help us escape,” I say, irritated.
He bends down to pick up the transistor radio and stuffs it into the waistband of his pants. “Jules…it’s just that it seems impossible. I have to figure out the best way to save you.”
I shoot him a glare. “When I said I was fighting for you, Evan Whittaker, I meant it.”
“I know…”
“Then help me look.”
Most of the items are linens and cleaning supplies. Evan sorts through the bottles and rubs his forehead. “I could make a bomb out of some of this, but what good will that do us? We don’t even know where Jo and Reece are.”
“Evan, please.”
He takes a deep breath and his face hardens. “We need weapons. Sure, a chemical bomb is good in a pinch, but it’s hard to transport and harder to use with any accuracy when you have a target.”
I kiss his cheek. “Thank you.”
Frowning he rubs his face. “I’m still not sold that this is a good idea. The other is safer for you, but I told you that I’d give you anything you asked for, and I meant it.”
“And I love you for that.” I give him another kiss, on the lips this time. “So we need weapons.”
He leans against a shelf and his face becomes expressionless, and I realize he’s lost in thought. “You know something has been bothering me about Reece’s mother’s disappearance from the UR, and I couldn’t figure out what it was until now.”
“What?”
“She disappeared soon after my dad made his discov
ery about possibly crossing universes. He had just made the calculations to the box but one part of the mathematical equation didn’t work.”
“And?”
“If she took the equation, then why haven’t they asked me to supply that part?”
I look at him, confused.
Excitement fills his eyes. “Why hold me for general information? Why haven’t they asked me to give them the equation or had me work on it? They never said what they wanted specifically. Just a general ‘tell us what you know’.”
I don’t understand where he’s going with his questions. “I don’t know. Maybe they didn’t think you’d tell them. Maybe they thought you’d try to sabotage it.”
He shakes his head. “Something’s not right here.”
“Well, what could it be? They’re definitely playing mind games with us. They said they were going to execute you and then they came in to kill me. ”
He lifts an eyebrow. “Were they? The room had cameras, you know.”
This doesn’t surprise me, but that means they captured my every moment with Evan. Making out included. A blush rushes to my cheeks. “But wouldn’t they hear you telling me about the box?”
“No, that’s why I whispered it in your ear. The cameras are UR technology. Fifth generation. They must have stolen it. The fifth gen had crappy microphones that couldn’t pick up lower volumes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” And what did I do with Evan that was captured on the cameras?
“Jules, that’s not important.” He waves his hand.
Sure, maybe not to him.
“Listen, what if they’re buying time? They’re using me—and you, because the UR wants you too—as a bargaining chip? What if the execution order was staged to get the UR to give the rebels what they want? ”
“And what is that?”
“I don’t know.”
“Then that doesn’t do us any good at all.”
“Not necessarily, but it tells me that you’re probably right. My plan wouldn’t have worked. They don’t really need the information I have.”
“But wait. If they don’t need it, maybe they already have it.” What does that mean for my world?
“Maybe…”
“The rebels want to trade us for something.”
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