Evie actually sounds excited.
“Okay,” I sigh. “I’ll give notice on the first.”
“You bet your ass you will. I swear I’ll hitch a ride to New York if you don’t.”
“I’ll talk to you tomorrow. I’m going to go sleep this miserable mood away.”
“Night, my friend.”
I lie back on my bed wondering why my life has turned out the way it has.
My phone starts to buzz, and I frown as I look at the screen. I thought it’s probably Evie, but seeing Marcus’ name makes me fumble as I try to answer the call.
“Marcus?” I can’t keep the surprise from my voice. Never in a million years did I think he would phone me.
Did he break up with the woman?
Even if he did, it doesn’t mean anything.
“Willow, it’s Mia. I’m Rhett’s little sister and a friend of Marcus. He asked me to phone.”
A friend of Marcus?
Crap, is Marcus dating Rhett’s sister?
“Is he okay?” It’s really all I want to know. She better not be calling to invite me to their engagement. I’m seriously going to lose my mind then.
“Can you come over to his place so we can talk?”
“Now?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
I glare at the phone. I swear if she invites me face to face I’m going to punch her.
On the drive over, I start to worry. Maybe something happened to Marcus. He wouldn’t let his girlfriend invite me to their engagement.
I rush up the stairs, not sure what’s waiting for me. When I knock on the door, I try to prepare myself for whatever Mia wants to talk about.
The door opens, and a stunning woman smiles at me. Damn, I can see why he fell for her.
“Hi, Willow. I’m Mia,” she says, giving me space to walk inside.
I only want to hear if Marcus is okay so I can leave.
“Hi, Mia. Is Marcus okay?”
She takes a deep breath which makes a cold shiver crawl down my spine.
No. Something happened to Marcus.
“Willow, when you see him, you might be a little shocked.”
Oh, my God. It’s bad. I can see it on her face.
I want to block my ears from whatever she’s about to say, but all I can do is stand and listen.
“He’s very sick, and if you need a minute to prepare yourself, I’ll understand. He’s lost a lot of weight, and he’s exhausted, but he can’t wait to see you.”
If he’s here, it can’t be that bad. Right?
“He’s in his bedroom. Do you want to see him?”
I nod, not sure what to expect. When Mia takes my hand, my heart drops to my feet.
It must be bad if she’s offering me support just to see him.
A million things race through my mind as we walk to his room. It smells different.
Shit, it feels different.
I walk into his room, and my eyes immediately go to his bed.
Oh, my God.
What happened to him? It’s only been two months. He’s a skeleton.
“Hey, babe,” he whispers. “Surprise.”
I force my feet to move forward so I can sit next to him before my legs give way.
He’s so pale.
I take in his frail state, and without hearing the words, I know what it means.
The man I love is dying.
That’s why he pushed me away.
The realization shudders through me. Marcus didn’t want me to see this.
All the heartache from the last two months fades away as a more profound ache takes root inside of me. It leaves a devastating path of regret and grief.
All the time we’ve wasted that we could’ve had together.
I lean forward and press a kiss to his lips. Feeling how cold they are beneath mine makes fear bleed through my soul.
I have to be brave for Marcus. No matter how hard it will be.
I pull back and whisper, “You know I hate surprises.”
My words make him smile, and I make a silent promise to make him laugh as much as possible.
“I’m sorry I pushed you away,” he whispers. “I have something to tell you, but before I do, you need to know that I love you. I don’t want you to pity me.”
A sob escapes my lips. I don’t want to hear the words out loud.
Don’t say it.
Please.
“My heart is dying.”
I close my eyes so he won’t see my pain. It rips through me with cruel claws and merciless blows.
Please let this be a bad dream.
“They missed fragments when they removed the bullet,” he whispers. I lean closer so I can hear him. “It’s embedded in my heart, and because of the lead poisoning my heart is too weak to survive an operation.”
Raw pain swallows me whole.
“Have you seen other doctors?” I whisper.
“I have. I’m dying, Willow.”
The ache is so intense that I struggle to breathe past it. I frame his face with my hands and lean closer.
Be strong, Willow.
Be strong for the man you love.
“I’m here now. I love you, and I’m not leaving your side, even if you become an ass again.”
“When I do become an ass, please remember that I love you. I fucking love you with every beat of my heart.”
I bury my face in his neck and cry for the unfairness of it all.
Chapter 13
MARCUS
I regret telling Willow. I love having her here, but I hate seeing the heartache in her eyes.
I listen to her deep breaths as she sleeps, lying with her ear pressed to my heart. How’s it possible that I love her so much when I haven’t even kissed her properly?
Why is life so cruel? I finally find a woman I love, but I can’t have a future with her. I’ll never get to make love to her.
I don’t want to sleep and risk losing a moment with Willow, but I fight a losing battle as my eyes drift close.
∞∞∞
WILLOW
I’m woken as Marcus’ body jerks away from me.
“Summer.” The groan is filled with so much sorrow, that it makes my body move before I realize that he’s dreaming.
Marcus has a death grip on the pillow against his chest.
I shake his shoulder lightly. “Marcus, wake up. You’re dreaming.”
He darts up as if I’ve shocked him, and stumbles out of bed, still clutching the pillow to him.
I crawl out of bed, but as I reach out to him, he lunges forward. He slams into me and struggling to regain my balance, we both fall to the floor. His eyes are open wide and filled with terror as his left hand closes around my neck. I grab his wrist, and because he’s so weak, I manage to pull his hand away from me.
“I won’t let you kill her,” he hisses as he pulls back his fist. It’s clear he’s fighting something, unaware of his surroundings. I duck to the side while blocking the blow with my arm.
“Marcus,” I scream, hoping it will wake him. “It’s me, Willow.”
His breathing comes faster as he starts to blink, but I keep my guard up just in case.
“Willow,” he whispers, sounding horrified.
“It’s okay. You had a dream.”
He moves away from me and sits on the floor. Pressing his hand to the scar on his chest, his body jerks as the first cry tears through him. The sound alone breaks my heart but seeing the man I love so broken, kills a part of my soul.
I scramble to my knees and place my hand on his thigh.
“It felt so real,” he gasps.
“What felt real?” I encourage him. Maybe if he talks about the dream, it will help him calm down
“Summer,” he whispers. “When he shot her, she fell on top of me. Her cheek was right here.” He slaps his palm against the scar. “I kept staring into her eyes, wishing she would blink.”
I wrap my arms around Marcus, holding him tight. I
have no words of comfort to offer him. I can’t tell him it will be okay because it won’t.
It’s only going to get worse.
∞∞∞
MARCUS
It felt so real. I could even feel Summer’s skin growing cold against my chest. The eerie stillness that settled over her body. Her lifeless eyes. It’s all too much to handle. I’m going to lose my mind long before my heart stops beating.
I can’t put Willow through that. I can’t die knowing she will be haunted by my lifeless eyes. I want her to remember my life, not my death.
I close my eyes, knowing she won’t leave without a fight. I don’t want to hurt her, but I have no choice. Watching her grieve me while I’m still alive, will be unbearable.
She comes into the room and smiles at me.
“You need to go,” I whisper. I don’t have the strength for anything more than a whisper.
“Where?”
“Willow, I don’t want you here,” I spell it out for her.
Instead of looking hurt, she glares at me.
“You’re stuck with me. I said I wouldn’t leave and I meant it.”
“Please,” I resort to begging.
Her face softens, and her eyes filled with worry.
“Why?”
“I want you to remember me alive. All I remember of Summer are her vacant eyes and how still she was. I don’t want you remembering that about me. I love you, but it’s already hard enough. There’s not much left that I can control. Give me this. I need it.”
Tears start to roll over her cheeks which makes this so much harder. She’s the last person I want to hurt.
“Come here.”
I wait for her to sit down next to me on the bed. Taking her hand, I pull her down on me.
When her ear is pressed against my chest, I whisper, “I need you to remember the sound of my beating heart.” Tears make my voice hoarse, but I push through. “I need to know that I won’t die completely. I need to be alive in your memories.”
Holding her, I let her cry against my chest. When she pulls free from my arms, she shakes her head as she wipes the tears from her face with the back of her hands.
“I’m not leaving you,” she whispers. “Let me stay with you. Let me have these last few weeks with you. I need to hold you, Marcus. I need to love you. When the time comes…” Her voice cracks and she takes a few deep breaths before she continues, “I will give you what you need when we’re out of time.”
“Promise,” I whisper.
“I promise.”
Chapter 14
MARCUS
~Hell hath no fury like a pissed off Miss Sebastian~
(Three weeks after the operation…)
“Marcus Reed!” Miss Sebastian screeches as she comes down the hallway. “You better not still be in bed.”
I pull the covers over my head, only to have it yanked off seconds later.
“Your filthy ass is stinking up my house. Get in the bath.”
“You were the one who insisted that I stay here,” I growl.
“Darling, I’m also the one who’s going to bathe you like a damn toddler if you push me any further.”
Knowing she will, I glare at her. “You’re a pain in the ass.”
She blinks at me as her cheeks turn red with anger. “That’s it. I’m done talking,” she shrieks before stomping out of the room.
I turn on my side and close my eyes with the full intention of going back to sleep.
When I hear her heels stomping back towards the room, I let out a heavy sigh. The next moment a wave of cold water crashes over me.
I dart up, which makes a sharp ache spread through my chest.
“Fuck, woman!”
“Don’t you dare talk to me like that. I swear I will put you over my knee and give your ass the spanking your mamma never did.”
My eyes snap up to hers. “If she didn’t fucking die then maybe she would’ve gotten around to it,” I hiss.
Miss Sebastian’s eyebrows shoot into her hairline. Oh hell, now I’ve gone and done it.
“Don’t play the pity card with me. You need to pull your head out of that fine ass of yours and start living your damn life. You’re driving us all insane. You’ve been given a second chance, and all you do is sleep it away.”
“I’m not wasting anything. I’m recovering from having my ribs cracked open,” I growl as I walk to the bathroom. The only way I’ll get Miss Sebastian off my back is by taking the damn bath.
I fill the bath and strip out of my boxers. As I sink into the water, Miss Sebastian walks in, closes the toilet seat, and sits down.
“Do you mind? I’m bathing.”
She crosses her legs and smiles. “I don’t mind at all.” She wiggles a finger in the general direction of my cock. “Darling, you’ve got nothing my eyes haven’t seen before. I washed your ding-dong. Quite a few times actually.”
“Thanks for reminding me of that,” I snap. I grab the cloth and cover my cock.
She swipes the damn cloth from my cock and starts to lather it with soap. When she yanks one of my feet out of the water and begins to wash it, I try to slap her hand away, but I can’t reach.
“Will you stop being so stubborn, and let me wash your feet? It’s not like you can reach them. Now, if you weren’t so damn stubborn, and you did your exercises you’d be able to bathe your own ass. Until then, your sexy ass belongs to me.”
I drop back into the water and wonder for the hundredth time why I agreed to move in here until I’ve recovered.
“I might not have met Willow, but any woman who’s willing to give you a second and third chance deserves the medal of honor. I swear I will bedazzle one for her myself.” She drops my right foot into the water and grabs the left one. “I know you told me that you’re only friends with Willow, but it’s clear as day that you love her. She’s worth fighting for, and you can’t do that when you’re winded from taking a few steps. You need to get stronger so you can woo her. A woman like Willow won’t wait forever. I overheard Leigh talking with her earlier today. Your Willow has moved back home. Do you know where that is?”
“She’s not my fucking Willow,” I snap.
“I swear I will throw pepper in that mouth of yours. Does she deserve to be talked about like that?”
Fuck, Miss Sebastian is right. I’m a fucking asshole.
“Yes, you’ve got that right. You’re an asshole. You might be a sexy one, but lately, your assholishness far outweighs the sexy.”
She drops my left leg back into the water, then throws the cloth at my cock.
“Wash it before it turns green. There’s not a woman on God’s green earth who wants a man with a green ding-dong.”
I let out a sigh when Miss. Sebastian finally leaves me alone.
I should’ve said she’s not my Willow. She’ll always be my Willow. I’ve done nothing to deserve her but I sure as hell want her. Fuck, I’ve made her life a living hell. The last time I saw Willow was on Christmas day. I seriously didn’t think I was going to survive the operation. I still feel ripples of the fear I felt before I went in for the surgery.
Saying goodbye to Willow, fuck that was hard. We’ve been messaging, and she wanted to come visit me, but I asked her not to. I want to get better before we see each other again. I want to get stronger.
I want to be a man that’s worthy of her.
While I’m recovering, she’s taking the time to move out here. Miss Sebastian is right though. I’m going to have to start working harder if I want to be in better shape for when I see Willow again.
“Oh, I almost forgot,” Miss Sebastian suddenly says from the doorway.
“My fucking heart, woman! Do you want to kill me?”
“I’ve thought about it a lot lately so I wouldn’t push it. Anyway, I was busy saying Rhett and Mia are coming over for dinner.”
I wait impatiently for her to finish what she’s saying.
“And? Out with it.”
“Darling, you need to ring your din
g-dong and get rid of all that frustration.”
“Ah…” I can’t even get the fucking words out.
“We need to do your exercises as soon as you’re done bathing so don’t take too long.”
“Get out,” I grind the words out. “Close the door and get out.”
She starts to close the door. “Don’t forget to ring your ding-dong.”
Fuck, my life has turned into a circus. I close my eyes and remind myself that Miss Sebastian means well.
∞∞∞
WILLOW
“I’m never moving again,” I groan as I fall across my bed.
“I hope not, or my ass will be out on the street,” Evie says as she sits down on the corner of the bed.
“If this idea of mine is a success, you can always come and work with me.”
She flops down on her back and smiles at me. “That would be awesome.”
“I have so much to do tomorrow, but all I want to do is sleep for the rest of the year.”
“Talking about this year, besides starting your own business, what other plans do you have?”
I can tell from the curious look in Evie’s eyes that she’s referring to Marcus. If I’m honest with myself, I’m not sure where things stand with us.
Do I love him? Yes, with all my heart.
Will we ever be more than friends? That’s where I’m not so sure. I don’t think Marcus has it in him to be in a committed, romantic relationship.
I answer her truthfully. “My heart’s been put through the shredder, Evie. Marcus and I are good friends. We love each other, but I don’t think we’re meant to be more than friends. Every time I think there’s a possibility of us getting romantically involved, something happens.”
“Has he kissed you?” she asks as she turns on her side, propping her head on her hand.
“No, we didn’t even get that far.” Then I think of the few closed mouth kisses I’ve given him. “We’ve given each other a few pecks, but that was it.”
“So no toe-curling, knee-weakening, all-consuming kisses?”
I let out a burst of laughter. “Definitely none of those.”
“When are you seeing him? It’s been weeks since he had the surgery.”
Ruthless (An Enemies To Lovers Novel Book 4) Page 10
