by Katy Winter
"Oh," he said, for want of anything else. "And Brue?"
"Brue will move out with Maren. I've no worries about the boy because Maren and his wife have well-nigh adopted our little brother. You've not met Maren's wife, have you?"
"No," responded Daxel, seeing amusement on his brother's face. "Why?"
"She's very motherly."
"Ah," said Daxel with comprehension. "I've noticed how Maren is with Brue. He cares for the boy, doesn't he?" Sarehl nodded. Daxel threw himself down on Sarehl's bed. "Gods, what shall I do?" Sarehl looked over at him affectionately.
"Don't worry, little brother. We'll make you so busy you'll wish you were back lazing in the troop!" Daxel's head came up indignantly, then he fell back laughing.
"I challenge you on that!"
"I thought you would," said Sarehl to himself.
~~~
Four weeks later, Sarehl left Taki for Kyaran. It was a hard time for Brue, because he'd only become reacquainted with one of the brothers who now left. He stood watching the milling entourage that accompanied the Strategos these days when he travelled, Maren's wife beside him, her arm protectively about the boy's shoulder, while Maren had a reassuring hand on the boy's copper head.
Sarehl spent a long time farewelling his little brother and his hug of Brue was such that it brought tears to the blue eyes, and though Daxel's farewell was briefer, it was a fierce one that Brue responded to with a quiver. Brue's goodbyes to the foresters and Kaleb were tearful, but he swallowed hard and accepted the indulgent pats on the head from men who now had other priorities. Kalor stayed longest with him.
"Learn all you can, little fellow," he said quietly. "You're a good lad, Brue, and we care very much for you. Let Maren be a father to you. Respond to him as you do to me."
"I'll try hard," promised Brue, his lips trembling.
"Good boy," approved Kalor, stooping to kiss the upturned, wistful face. "I'll miss you, lad, and await the day we all join up in a single army. Remember, little fellow, it won't be long now."
It was now that Brue caught at Kalor's hand again as the man turned away. Looking back and down, Kalor saw the boy clutched the larkbill the Cyrenic carved for him long cycles ago. Kalor gave a broad smile of understanding and flicked Brue's curls affectionately before he strode away. Brue's eyes followed him.
Brue watched the entourage become orderly and prepare for the imminent move forward. Strategos Sarehl had all the trappings of dignity and consequence, all of which made Daxel highly disrespectful. Sarehl took the ragging in good part, mainly because he was relieved Daxel hadn't questioned him more closely about Ensore's letter.
Sarehl had no desire to explain the Marshal felt that, during the brief manoeuvre that would save the northern army time and ultimately put them well ahead of Lodestok, they'd pass too near to the southern army. Daxel wouldn't have understood Ensore's concern - both he and Sarehl felt the youth's dignity would be saved by his not knowing he'd been deliberately sent from possible danger.
When the entourage began to move, Brue broke free from Ceda and Maren, rushed along the length of the train until he reached Sarehl at the head of it, and, breathless, caught at Sarehl's stirrup. Sarehl glanced down and immediately put up his hand for a halt. He helped Brue clamber into the saddle, so the boy could ride with him to the city gates just opened for the departure.
There, Sarehl clasped Brue tightly, before he let the boy scramble clear and then he held the small outstretched hand for as long as he could as his horse walked forward again. Ceda and Maren found the boy crouched by the closing gates, sobbing as if his heart would break. When Maren bent down and gently lifted the boy into his arms, Brue flung his arms about Maren's neck and wept bitterly and deeply into his shoulder. It was a very caring hand that stroked the copper head as Maren and Ceda took Brue home.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Soji tried to come to terms with an experience that devastated her. For days after she was returned to her father, she wept without respite, the physical violation bad enough, but the emotional rape changing Soji in a way her father couldn't comprehend. Captive healers sent to her chamber to help, found they couldn't reach her on any level, spiritual, mental or physical, and she refused to have any man near her for long. In those first days Soji screamed at the healer until he left the room.
She withdrew, unable to accept what her father had permitted done to her; while she wept in his arms, she rejected him with fear and loathing. She accepted the touches of her brothers because she felt she must. Her family became strangers to her.
Even her mother couldn't reach her daughter, because Soji saw, for the first time, how, as a Churchik wife, Soraya was completely dominated by her warrior spouse. She wouldn't do or say anything that would bring inevitable physical retribution, Alleghy one of the warrior class not averse to keeping his wife submissive through use of a whip. Other warriors didn't, generally, follow the same practice. Soji rejected the life she was raised to accept and respect, because she knew she'd receive support only if she was slavishly obedient like her mother. Sometimes Soji felt choked by despair.
She woke at night, lathered with sweat, because above her she always saw the cold and empty, dark eyes that looked straight through her without emotion. She saw and felt the soft, dark curls that tickled her skin, remembered the long curling eyelashes and the full, curved mouth, and then felt again the power of the lean body that claimed her as surprisingly gentle hands made her repeatedly respond. And as she re-lived the nightmare, she knew she cried for a young man to whom she'd have willingly given everything.
She thought back to her reaction when she first sighted Luton at Kher's side and, like all the girls present, she saw a tall and very handsome boy who drew all eyes. Though he stood quietly, Soji sensed that in some way he was different; if his eyes were cold and impersonal, they were also fascinatingly magnetic. Her heart flutter had been one of pleasant anticipation.
That was until she stood close to Luton. He'd looked down at her with such glittering eyes, Soji had felt breathless fear grip her. She knew, in that moment, that their destinies were irrevocably entwined and though she asked mechanically who he was, deep inside Soji knew the answer, that he'd unintentionally hurt her and that she'd have his child. Always in her nightmare she saw the youth she wanted to love, and in collision with that the reality of the spiritless and cold-blooded man with the chilling dark eyes that seemed to devour her. She tossed on her pillows, cried brokenly, until exhausted and too weary to be awake, restless sleep came.
Soji listened to the angered ravings of her father and brothers and knew they were impotent. She accepted she carried Luton's child but it made her sick with dread when she thought that one day, after it was born, the child would be taken to the Keep. Soji became increasingly convinced Blach would do to her child what he'd already done to Luton. She made herself ill when she let her mind dwell on that and no one suspected that as soon as Luton released her, Soji determined that her child wouldn't go to the Keep. Soji decided that both she and the child would die before that happened, though she'd no idea how she'd save her child.
She knew, too, that Luton was correct when he said she'd bear a daughter. As her maternity increased, Soji began to dream more vividly; it was less often of Luton, though she saw him in watery visions that became hazy. Mostly she began to see a small, elfin-faced woman, with Luton's mass of tumbling dark curls, but this woman had the most expressive and large green eyes that offered Soji comfort. They smiled at her. The face was sometimes young, then older. In her dreams, Soji stared into those eyes, mesmerised.
Near term, Soji clearly understood that she looked at someone who was either her daughter, or closely resembled what her daughter would be, and the woman had to be nearly related to Luton. The woman sometimes showed her mountains and indistinct people who came towards her, but most often she was shown the face of another older woman, with kindly gray eyes and her hands out in welcome.
Soji never spoke of what she saw and when she b
egan to see other things as well, she knew she couldn't speak of them either. It was as if her experience with Luton broke a barrier within and now she could see and comprehend things and people far distant and in places she'd never been.
She learned to be profoundly sad for Luton, so wantonly destroyed and far more cruelly used than she was. She knew her people had led to his enslavement and imprisonment as Blach's mute slave. It took her some time to come to this, but when she did, a calm remoteness wrapped itself around her that set her at a distance from others and gave her an unusual degree of dignity in one so young. She was no longer a young girl. Her only apparent distress was when talk veered to her child going to the Keep. She would turn and flee in tears.
The day before the child was born, Soji rested in a chair outside in a sunny courtyard. As she looked into the distance, she suddenly saw Luton with unexpected clarity. He was hunched in a chair in a small, sunless study, his long fingers tracing lines on a paper and his lips moving. He looked painfully thin, frail, very pale and quite ill. She snapped the image shut and then realised, with a surge of shock, she'd not been able to do that before. She withdrew even further into herself, her grief for Luton genuine and deep.
~~~
It was a surprisingly easy birth, the child tiny and frail-looking. When her father came to see her, Soji quite relaxed with the baby cradled in her arms and staring down at her, Alleghy had the feeling he looked upon a mature woman he simply didn't know. He spoke curtly.
"I have a name for her, daughter. She will be called Bronyr - that means `child brought forth unwillingly`." Soji shook her head.
"She already has a name, Pater. I named her seasons ago." Alleghy chewed on his inner cheek.
"Oh?" he asked interrogatively. "What is her name then, child?"
"Jonqi, Pater. It means `light and grace`." Alleghy transferred his stare to the infant and grunted.
"Very well, if you wish, child, she will be called Jonqi."
"I thank you, Pater," murmured Soji, with real gratitude.
"She is very small, is she not?"
"Yes, Pater, she is." Both looked at the dark down on the tiny head and Soji whispered, "She will be dark-haired."
"Yes, child," agreed Alleghy, his voice hardening, "she will." He frowned heavily. "Let us hope she has nothing else of her father in her. Do not get attached to the child, daughter. In five seasons she goes to the Keep, so you would be well advised to hand the child over to slaves to be cared for. I have other plans for you."
Mutely, Soji shook her head and gave a shiver when her father left the room. She knew that already a messenger was sent to the sorcerer, informing him the infant was born and would be duly delivered to the Keep. Soji was present when the messenger returned from Kher, with a sealed billet for her father. Alleghy broke the seal and read the contents of the letter out loud.
"The newborn child, daughter of my slave Luton, will be escorted to Haskar Kher in exactly five seasons from the signing of this letter. She belongs to me. Her life will be within the Keep."
As she listened, Soji's eyes hardened unrecognisably, a fact that didn't escape her father. He strode across to her and painfully gripped her shoulder, the shake he gave her sharp.
"You will obey Blach as you will me, Soji," he cautioned her. He looked across at Soraya. "What are you about, woman, to let her believe she may do as she chooses?" Soji glanced across at her mother to see Soraya's head drop, her eyes full of tears. "You do understand that your obedience is my will, Soji?" Soji didn't respond. "You do not want a sorcerer's spawn about you for the rest of your life. I have a warrior in mind for you whom you will wed - he tells me he does not care you are not a maid. I wish you to show signs of interest, girl."
Soji stared at her feet and didn't speak for a long moment. Then she answered quietly.
"As you will, Pater."
Alleghy lifted Soji's chin, to read hurt and defiance in the blue eyes.
"Do not make me force your compliance, child," he warned. He looked into eyes that now brimmed with tears that fell onto his hand and he added more gently, "Since you wish to be with your little one, Soji, go to her and enjoy your time with her for as long as you have her." He gave her a push, his eyes pensively following her.
Soji returned to her daughter, dismissed the slave, and lifting the infant in her arms Soji held Jonqi close. Then she held the little girl further from her. She saw how the child's hair already thickened, began to densely curl, and saw, too, how dark the eyes became. Jonqi would resemble her father. There was little of Jonqi that showed she was a Churchik child - perhaps it was only in the shape of the eyes and in the soft, pale southern skin that she inherited from her mother. Soji pulled the little girl close again, whispering fiercely, "No one other than your father shall ever have you, Jonqi, I promise you that."
Soji crouched beside the cradle with the child pressed against her chest. The infant was silent, but Soji wept.
~~~
Soji waited and planned. Each day she muttered that she must be patient and still refused to let any other tend the child for any length of time. Though her parents raised their eyebrows at this, they didn't demur, both hoping that in time Soji would lose interest in the child and show herself obedient to her father's wishes.
A young warrior, called Tago, came to visit regularly at Alleghy's request. The young warrior's assurance to Soji, that he didn't mind she'd given birth to something impure and vile that deserved to go to its father, didn't endear him to Soji. In every way he was an exemplary warrior and Soji knew that, in another time, had she not known Luton, she'd have happily accepted Tago as her spouse and probably agreed with his sentiments about slaves and inferior races. Now she merely dreaded his calls and tried to absent herself. When Alleghy realised her tactics, he suggestively fingered his whip. Cowed, Soji suffered Tago to approach and accepted his increasingly pointed familiarity.
~~~
Jonqi was four seasons old, raven-haired, dark-eyed but with very fair, almost milky skin, and wide-opened, large almond-shaped eyes, heavily fringed by very long black eyelashes. She was a remarkably pretty child, but solemn, and didn't speak at all, nor had she been heard to utter infant sounds like gurgling or crying. Jonqi just placidly smiled.
Soji's chance to hopefully plan an escape came unexpectedly. They were at evening meal, when she suddenly became aware of the conversation going on around her. She'd let her mind drift but now heard her father address his two sons; she kept her head respectfully bowed, not wishing to draw attention to herself.
"The warlord," Alleghy was saying, frowning into his goblet, "calls for the elite to join him in the north. That means, Sven, you will take my place here as overlord of Dahkilah. You have seen enough to do this very well." Sven gave a cold smile.
"Certainly, Pater," he replied with emphasis. Alleghy nodded comprehension.
"You, Loki, will move southwest towards Chika to assist Haskar Sek's son with continued monitoring of supply caravans. There are to be slave caravans returning north after all these cycles, so you are to help round up all the under-utilised slaves from the southwest, before you return here until further notice." Alleghy paused and drank deeply. "The warlord wants as many slaves north as he can get. Seems an irony, does it not?" Alleghy caught Sven's eye, then looked meaningfully at Soji's bent head - Sven nodded his understanding. Loki glanced at his sister but made no comment. Alleghy spoke quietly. "And you, daughter, will go east to your uncle. I have advised Haskar Kher you can be met there, so you will stay with your cousin Kesk until the haskar comes to you. He will remove the child to the Keep and you will immediately return to Chika, to Loki, in preparation for your marriage. I wish that union to be consummated before I go north, so I have asked Tago to be with us for the ceremony three days from today. You will make yourself ready for him. I trust I make myself plain, child?"
Soji lifted her head, her eyes a mute appeal. Alleghy shook his head and she looked away. She brushed a tear fr
om her cheek.
"I understand you, Pater," she whispered.
"You know I will brook no defiance, so you will do as you are bid, girl?"
"Yes, Pater."
Soji behaved irreproachably over the next days and was so submissive and compliant, Alleghy softened towards her and gentled in his attitude.
~~~
She didn't refuse preparations for the Churchik custom of marri, allowing older women to do as they willed. On the afternoon of the ceremony, she lay, or stood, as directed, until she was led to the voluptuous chamber set aside for the marital witnessing.
When she asked to be alone with Jonqi for a few moments, Alleghy, in high good humour, granted her that. She knelt by the little girl. Her hands went under Jonqi's skirt for the small phial secreted there. Turning her back so those present for marri couldn't see what she did, Soji drank from the phial and put it back in hiding, kissed the little girl, then rose. Her father came back and took her hand. Opening the chamber door, he led her to the bed where Tago lay.
It took Soji back to Luton. It took all her control and courage not to scream when she was carefully lifted and laid beside Tago. Resolutely, she closed her eyes and clenched her teeth. When Tago claimed her as his future wife she gasped at his rough passion, but heard approving murmurs of those gathered about them. Warrior marital ownership, enshrined in the ceremony of marri, was complete. All she knew, as she drifted into a drug-induced slumber, was that Jonqi was beside her as usual and she was secure in the knowledge there'd be no child as the result of her union with Tago. Comforted, Soji let sleep take her.
~~~
On the day Alleghy left for the north, he gently blessed his daughter when she came dutifully forward to farewell him.
"All will be well, child," he murmured, as he stooped to kiss her hair. "You will see that I am right - you should be with child to Tago. Be polite to your uncle and obey him and your brothers always. You understand you are legally tied, through marri? You know what you owe to Tago, do you not?"
