“There’s a lot of shit between your pops and Chanel.”
Jay ran a hand down his face and his eyes raised to the ceiling. “I know, man. You should’ve seen her face in his office. She seemed like she genuinely hated him. Or at least, really disliked him.”
“Nah, she doesn’t hate him,” I started before I thought better of speaking for her. I paused, contemplating whether or not I should tell Jason my perception of Chanel and their father’s relationship. I decided to keep my mouth shut on the subject, but Jay had other ideas.
“You think you know her that well?” I heard the challenge in his voice.
“I do,” I answered with confidence.
“What makes you think that?”
I rubbed the back of my neck, growing irritated at his line of questioning. I knew Chanel. Maybe not everything, obviously. But we’d spent too much time getting under one another’s skin for me not to know her. But I didn’t feel like sharing that with Jason. I wanted to keep the intimacy I felt with Chanel just between us.
“The real question is, why don’t you know her that well?”
Jay’s expression morphed into shock. “The hell is that supposed to mean?” He stood up from the bench at the same time I did.
“It means exactly what I said. She’s your sister. Why the fuck didn’t you know what the hell was going on in her life? Why the hell did you find out about the shit that went down with her fiancé at the same time I did? Five years after the fact?” Those were questions I’d been wondering for weeks now. Another reason I’d kept my distance from Jay, aside from my traveling. He was her older brother, supposed to protect her, no matter what. And he failed. So, I was pissed at him too.
“Man, I tried to look out for her. You should know that better than anyone else. What the hell did you think I was doing those times I asked you to stop in and check in on her while you were in D.C?”
My head shot back in surprise. I thought back to the times Jay would ask me to pop in on Chanel while I was out in D.C. handling business. She was still in law school at the time and living with Ethan.
“I never liked that dude. Something about him always seemed off to me. Well, not even him but the way Chanel seemed to close up in herself when he was around.” Jay shook his head as if remembering the signs of what was going on in their relationship right in front of him and being completely oblivious to it at the time. “You never picked up on anything when you saw her out there?”
I closed my eyes, thinking about one of the times I visited Chanel’s D.C. apartment.
Six years earlier…
“Xavier, what’re you doing here?” Chanel asked through the intercom of her apartment building.
“I was in town and remembered you didn’t live far from one of the spots I’m opening. Let me up. I bought some pumpkin scones from the deli down the block.”
“Oh! I love that place. Hang on.”
A second later I heard the buzzer sound signaling I’d been granted access to the building. I opted to take the stairs to her third-floor apartment instead of the elevator.
“Hey.” She answered the door with a warm smile on her face.
I let my eyes glide down the length of her body. Her hair was pulled back in a poofy ponytail at the back of her head. She wore a simple, gray sleeveless tank top and black stretch pants. I grinned at the pink polish on her toe nails. I briefly wondered why I even noted the color of her toenails, but pushed that thought aside.
“Hey. Can I come in?” I asked when I realized I was still on the outside of her door as we stared at one another.
“Oh.” She blinked. “Sure, come in. Is it cold out?”
“Nah, not too bad.” I pulled off the leather jacket I’d been wearing and placed it on the back of one of the wooden chairs in the kitchen. “What’re you up to?”
“I’m just studying. Finals start next week.”
“Then only one more semester of law school left. You ready to work as a lawyer?”
She gave a halfhearted shrug. “I’m scared as hell, to be honest. You want something to drink?” She asked over her shoulder as she pulled out two plates from an overhead cupboard.
I had to tear my eyes away from her round ass in those leggings. “Here, let me help.” I stepped behind her, placing my hand on the small of her back and easily reaching up, grabbing two saucers.
“Thank you.” Her voice was breathless. “I don’t know why Ethan insists on putting the dishes on the second shelf where I can barely reach them.”
The mention of her live-in boyfriend reminded me that she was taken. For some reason, my stomach twisted at the reminder that she shared this place with another man. I stepped back, placing my hands on the counter, instead of on her. “You didn’t need a plate for me. I just wanted to drop these off.” That was a partial lie. Jason had asked me to check on Chanel and make sure she was straight. I did that from time to time when I was in D.C.
“No, please stay for a little while.”
When she turned those big brown eyes on me, pleading, my knees felt a little weak.
“Ethan’s working late, as usual, and I’ve just been studying. It’s so quiet here.” She stared at me, waiting for my response. I dropped my coat, which I had grabbed from around the chair. That move instantly brought a smile to her face.
“A’ight. I’ve got some time before I have to be anywhere. But I’m not eating one of those pumpkin scones.” I pointed at the box with a look of disgust on my face.
“Oh, c’mon, they’re not that bad,” she teased, pushing the opened box in my face so I could smell them.
I turned my head. “Nah.”
“If you don’t like pumpkin scones, why did you buy them?”
“I told you, they’re for you. I remembered you liked the pumpkin scones I sold at my coffee shop back home.”
She grinned. “You remembered that?”
I nodded, shocking us both. She’d devoured those things from the little coffee shop I owned just off the campus of the University of Houston, where we’d both attended, though at different times.
“They were so delicious. Do you still sell them?” she asked, placing a scone on one of the saucers and pouring a glass of almond milk she’d pulled from the fridge.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I sold that place a couple of years ago.”
Her forehead creased. “Why?”
“I wasn’t interested in the cafe business.”
“On to bigger and better?”
I nodded.
“Um, well we have some brownies I bought earlier this week. You do like brownies , right?”
“Of course.”
“Almond milk? It’s vanilla flavored.”
“Sure.”
“I was used to regular milk, but my best friend Gabby is vegan, and she’s got me hooked on almond milk now,” she stated as she took a seat across from me at the wooden circular dining table. We enjoyed our snacks for a few minutes in silence. I had to force myself to keep it together when Chanel closed her eyes and moaned a little bit after the first bite of her scone.
“I’ve been trying to be good and stay away from that deli for weeks now.”
“Why?” I took a sip of my milk.
“Because between that place and the stress of finals, I could gain ten pounds, easy. Ethan’s already been making comments about me gaining weight.” She frowned and my fist tightened at the thought of her thinking she could be anything less than desirable.
“He’s a fucking fool.”
My bluntness caught her off-guard, and she gasped. I hadn’t said anything I didn’t mean, so I simply stared at her as I took another bite of my brownie. “Why aren’t you out on the town on a Friday night? I know you said you’ve got finals, but that’s not until next week.”
She made an unreadable face. “Ethan’s at work.”
“And? Why can’t you go out with friends?”
“Most of my friends are also busy studying. But my best friend is packing to move across the cou
ntry in a few days.”
“That sucks. Why aren’t you helping her?”
A pout formed on her lips. “We’re not speaking right now.”
“Why not?”
Her eyes shot up to my face before she peered at something over my shoulder. A far off look appeared on her face.
I lowered the glass of milk I’d been ready to take a sip from, alarm bells ringing in my gut.
“No reason. Just girl stuff.” She waved a hand as if it was no big deal.
Something told me differently, though. Before I could question Chanel about it, noise at the door drew both of our attentions. A few seconds later, the door opened, and a man strode through. He stopped short when his eyes landed on me. His face turned into a scowl.
“E-Ethan,” Chanel started, jumping from her seat and scurrying over to her boyfriend. “You’re home. I thought you’d be in a little later.” I could’ve been imaging things, but her voice sounded strange. Almost guilty.
I frowned, not liking the tone her voice now held. His scowl moved from me to Chanel.
“Yeah, I finished the brief I was working on earlier than expected. I thought I’d come home and surprise my favorite girl by taking her out to dinner. But I see you’ve already eaten.” He eyed the plates on the table, then turned his gaze on me.
I picked up my glass and took the last sip of milk before slowly standing. I didn’t like the vibe I was getting from this dude.
“Ethan, this is Xavier, Jason’s best friend. He’s in D.C. on business and stopped by to drop off some scones. We were just catching up.” She stopped talking shortly, biting her lower lip and moving to stand in between me and Ethan.
“Yeah, that’s right. You’ve told me about him.” His face seemed to soften just a little.
“What’s up?” I greeted, sticking my hand out.
“Not much, man.” He shook my hand. We stood at about the same height. At six-foot- one, I may have been an inch or two taller than him. “Thanks for keeping my girl company while I was at work.” He pulled Chanel into his side.
“Thanks for the scones, Xavier.” Chanel gave me a half-smile.
“Anytime,” I responded, and I swear Ethan’s face tightened at that. Before I could give him another look, my phone buzzed. I pulled it out seeing the name of the woman I’d intended to take out later that evening. That reminded me I needed to head out if I was going to make my date with Genene. I hit ignore but shot her a quick text letting her know I’d call her back in a few minutes.
“I gotta head out. Chanel, it was good catching up. Ethan.” I gave him a nod as I stepped around him and moved to the door.
“Thanks again,” Chanel added as she escorted me out.
There was a look in her eyes I wanted to ask about, but my phone buzzed again. This time it was my assistant, telling me some information about a building I’d been looking to purchase.
“You take care. Enjoy those scones.”
“I will.” She closed the door rather abruptly, but I didn’t think too much of it as I strolled down the hall, reading over the email I’d just received.
****
I looked up at Jason after recalling that exchange close to six years ago. “Shit,” I stated, slumping back down to the bench.
“What?” Jay frowned, sitting across from me.
“I felt something was off with that dude too. The first time I met him, he seemed...pressed that I was even in his apartment. Chanel’s demeanor changed too. Like, she scurried to be up underneath him, almost rushing me out the door once he showed up. Fuck! I should’ve known then.” I shook my head, unable to believe what I’d just remembered. How could I not have seen it back then? She was scared as hell of him. I’m sure Ethan coming home and seeing another man in his apartment had been enough to set him off that night. My hands balled into fists.
“Yo, X. Don’t beat yourself up about this either. You’re right, she’s my sister. I should’ve known too. I was too busy being caught up in my own world.”
“Fuck that. We both should’ve known better.” I shook my head, staring at the ground. My instincts were one thing I prided myself on, and now remembering how I’d ignored them pissed me off. “I’ve been looking for his ass too.”
Jason’s gaze shot back to me. “Ethan?”
“Hell, yeah. He’s been in the wind. He hasn’t worked full-time as a lawyer in years. Does some freelancing here and there, but he moves around a lot. I have a private investigator looking for him,” I admitted.
Jay nodded. “I had to handle Robert’s ass, so I got a little distracted from looking for Ethan.”
“I’m gonna see him sooner or later,” I stated. The memory I’d just had of that brief exchange back in D.C. made me want to see him soon. The look I’d been trying to identify in Chanel’s eyes that evening was fear. Plain and simple. It was the same look I remember seeing on the rooftop the night of her engagement party, when her fiancé came out while I was congratulating her. If I hadn’t been so concerned about my business or my date that first time, I might’ve caught on sooner. Either way, I knew I was going to catch up with Ethan’s ass eventually.
“Yo, why don’t you come over this Saturday? We can watch the game and catch up,” Jason invited.
I noted the time on the wall. We both needed to head out to get to work. “Yeah, that sounds cool. I’ll be there,” I answered. We slapped hands, giving each other a hand shake and half-hug. I grabbed my towel and went to do a quick cardio session before leaving to take a shower, all the while thinking about what I’d do to Ethan Miller once I saw him again.
****
Chanel
I blew out a deep breath as I stood in front of the door that read Dr. Sandra Winston. It’d taken me weeks to recognize the fact that I needed to come here. And then, it took another week to build up the courage to make the appointment. Thankfully, she had availability on Saturday mornings. I just needed to take one little step over the threshold into her office.
I’d thought about canceling, but enduring weeks of nightmares had finally set me straight. If I wasn’t dreaming about Anne Marie and Noah’s death, it was that same dream from my tenth birthday. And if it wasn’t either of those two, I laid awake yearning to be held by strong, chestnut arms. With all that hanging over my head, I pushed the glass door open and stepped into Dr. Winston’s outer office.
I was greeted by the scent of lavender. The space wasn’t too big or opulent, but it was inviting. The smell that wafted through the air and the small waterfall that sat on the bookshelf to the right gave off a calming feeling. I walked past the chairs lined up on either side to head to the front desk.
“Hi, can I help you?” the young blond male receptionist greeted as I approached.
“Yes, Chanel Richards. I have a ten o’clock with Dr. Winston.”
He nodded, then looked to the computer screen in front of him. “There you are. I just need your insurance card and can you fill out these forms for me?” He handed me a clipboard with the typical first-time patient forms attached.
After handing him my insurance card, I went and took a seat to fill out the forms. In the background, I heard him call Dr. Winston to let her know I was there.
“Dr. Winston will be out in five minutes,” he informed me.
“Thank you,” I responded, as I handed him the completed paperwork. Still feeling a little antsy, I opted to stand and take a look around the office. I examined the pictures of the three different psychotherapists who shared the office space. The articles that had been framed and put up on the walls were a testament to each of their abilities. Satisfied with my perusal, I sat and picked up a People magazine from the coffee table, but before I could get past the first few pages, I heard my name. I looked up into the face of a woman who looked to be in her early to mid-fifties. Her dark curly hair was graying at the temples and her caramel face wrinkled as she smiled.
“Chanel?” She approached me with her hand out.
I stood, taking her hand. “Dr. Winston, a ple
asure to meet you.”
“Come, my office is right down the hall,” she informed me, before turning and heading that way.
I followed, noting the two other closed doors we passed on the way.
“Please, have a seat.”
Her office was smaller than I predicted, but comfortable. Her desk was perched in the left corner, next to a large window that looked out onto the downtown street below. On the right, there was a large leather chair and a shelf behind it that held some psychology books and various plants. Again, the scent of lavender permeated the room, and I realized there was a diffuser sitting atop the shelf.
“Does the smell bother you? I can shut this off.” She pointed to the diffuser.
“No. It’s fine. I love the scent of lavender. And is that clary sage?”
She nodded. “I find a warm and relaxing environment helps my clients to open up. Essential oils help me create that type of ambiance.”
I wondered if that was true. “Hmm. My friend Gabby is into homeopathic remedies and such. She’s really into essential oils.” I sat and made myself comfortable on the black leather love seat across from the door.
“Tell me why you came to see me today?” She smoothed down the black midi-skirt she wore to sit in her chair, crossing her legs.
“Um, well, I haven’t been sleeping.”
“And how long has that been going on?”
“A little over a month.”
She looked up at me. “And what happened a month ago?”
I blew out a breath and pushed my hand through my hair. “My world kinda bottomed out.”
She gave me another look but remained silent, allowing me to continue.
“An article was released that detailed my last relationship.” I inhaled before continuing. “My ex-fiancé was abusive, physically and emotionally. It ended five years ago when I left him and moved across the country. The article tried to make it seem as if I was some vengeful man-hater who used my status as a divorce attorney to discredit the husband of a client. It also showed pictures of him and me together at a restaurant not too far from my current place of work, holding hands.”
“This was recent, then?”
Safe Space II: The Finale Page 3