"I was making breakfast. There's some left on the coffee table if you're in." I shrugged and offered him a cocky smile that felt almost foreign on my face. "All I need is milk. Mine is coming out in thick chunks."
"Ugh. You're so gross." He pointed to the bedroom. "Go take a shower and get dressed. Deza called yesterday and said I needed to have you in San Diego."
"I'm not ready." I put my hands on my hips and glanced back at the TV screen. "Let me finish the-"
"No. Go get in the fucking shower." My brother's lack of humor was concerning. Nothing bothered him, but he seemed a little shaken.
"Fine. Shit." I turned and walked to the bathroom, slamming the door behind me for good measure.
"And wash your hair." He pounded on the bathroom door.
"Sit on a dick and fuck off." I turned and leaned over, starting the water as emotion raged through me. I was beyond weary from thinking too much and maybe a little too much alone time, but I couldn't help it. Riley hadn't called, and nothing was resolved. Until that moment where I knew without a shadow of a doubt if we were moving forward or if we were over, I was stuck.
I needed resolution and the one good thing that had come from the last two weeks was that I knew without a doubt that I would accept whatever outcome. I might not be thrilled about it, but I'd figure it out. She would welcome me into her life as her man, and we could start building our dreams together, or she would reject me, and I'd call Jazz, buy a bottle of KY and get back to living.
The hot spray felt good against my skin, and I let out a long sigh and ducked my head under it as memories rolled through my mind, some of them so good it brought tears to my eyes.
Our first night together at my place. She'd wanted me to kiss her, hell, half-expected it from what I could tell. And I'd denied her. I smiled at the memory and held onto it.
"All right. I'm sorry for being a dick in the dressing room yesterday. I was wrong, and I shouldn't have said you were unprofessional." I slid my hands over her taut hips, her body so fucking hot it hurt. "It was me that was being unprofessional."
"We were both a little high on the scene we'd just wrapped up. Good art always stays with you, lingering in a way that leaves you edgy." Her eyes move down to my lips, and she lifted to her toes. Her movements were more than obvious, and yet I was trying hard to respect the professional relationship we were going to have.
I captured the sides of her face in hopes of controlling the situation a little better. She pressed toward me, but I shifted and pressed my lips to her forehead, breathing her in and falling in love a little bit. She was so damn perfect.
"As I said, we'll have each other's backs for the next few years, regardless of how pissy we get." I moved back and forced a smile. What a dick. Why hadn't I just kissed her? Right, because everyone expected me to be that guy. "You ready for dessert?"
Her expression fell, and I could see the hurt in her eyes even on the dimly lit porch. She righted herself quickly, nodding and giving me a tight smile. "Only if you have strawberries to go on it."
"Of course. Can you eat it any other way?" I laughed and turned, walking into the house as my stomach soured.
"Fuck." I paced around in the kitchen as my body ached for the girl outside on the patio. That she had lifted up to kiss me left me breathless, confused. I wasn't in a fucking movie. I was standing in real life faced with a hard decision. It was the type of situation that I kept myself out of, and always had. I never slept with my co-workers, never.
Some girl on the set, a pretty whore from the crowd, a slut from a fan club? Absolutely. But the beautiful woman that I would have to see every day for ten months? Never. Besides... what would she think when we got hot and heavy, and...
"And I didn't fit?" I pressed my hands to my face, growling softly as hard emotion ripped through me. I hadn't wanted a woman in years as badly as I wanted Riley.
"Hey! Hurry up in there. Deza needs you in San Diego by eleven. Let's go. Seriously. Scrub a fucking dub and make sure you clean your shit. You never know who you might meet." He laughed as I rolled my eyes.
It was good to have my brother there. Maybe he could help pull me out of my funk. I needed someone to. A ray of sunshine or fucking something.
My cock was fully erect as I glanced down, and a smile spread across my face. I reached down and stroked this huge thing. "There you are, boy. What the fuck? I think about Riley, and you decide to wake up from your hibernation?"
Another memory ran through my mind, her taking my dick so well, so much better than any other woman did, and my hormones raged to life, leaving me a little dizzy.
"Yeah. Let's stay here." I pressed my back against the cold tile wall and used both hands, working my shaft hard and fast as pleasure danced from my chest to my sack. I had to get her back. I was in love with her, completely lost to her, but there was another reason it was so damn important.
She could take me. All of me. Deep inside of her, and she didn't cry out in pain. She was the one woman that was obviously made for me. My soul mate.
My silly thinking was all I needed to throw myself over the edge into orgasm. I cried out, hitting my head on the wall as I shook violently.
The moment was needed so fucking bad. It woke me up, restarted my drive to get her, lifted the fog and made me desire another chance.
"You almost done?" Liam sounded pissy.
"Just jacking off for the first time in two weeks. Finish up that movie. I'll be out in an hour. I'm not letting this moment go too soon."
"Ugh. You're so gross."
"Yep. Just like my older brother." I turned toward the hot spray and dove into another memory, fucking myself for the next half hour until my legs wouldn't work.
I half-crawled out of the shower and dropped down on the toilet, water dripping off of me as I panted loudly. I assumed filming would begin again later that day, and Riley would be there. She had to.
She had a contract too.
The thought of seeing her left my heart racing, my body on edge. I had to have her as my own. Nothing else would do, no matter what neutral bullshit I kept chanting to myself.
There was only one woman for me.
Time to get her back.
Chapter 4
Riley
"Thanks for coming." Frank stood as I approached the small table just outside on the restaurant's patio. Deza glanced up, her expression solemn.
I'd spent the last two weeks moping around my apartment and jogging until my legs shook beneath me. With no job to go to, I was losing my grip on reality. Ethan had texted a few times and tried to call once, but I needed some space, and Jace had been right, Ethan needed it too. Although I loved him, we were miles apart in our maturity levels.
He was a playboy with his head in the clouds, and I was a poor girl from the wrong side of the tracks. What looked like a great love affair only had one way of working out in my mind... if someone scripted it to. Maybe seeing him over the two weeks would have changed my mind, or helped a little, but I hadn't let myself.
He was pulling everyone's strings at Eon from what I gathered, and when he finally decided to put on his big-girl panties and bring his ass out of hiding, we would all get back to work.
Not me though. I was having breakfast with Frank and Deza to tell them to find someone else. I was done. They could sue me or do whatever they needed to, but I wasn't willing to put myself through any more emotional turmoil. My life had been nothing but strife. To put myself right back into the center of the heartbreak I felt around Ethan was stupid. Masochistic.
"Sure." I sat down and kept my attention on Frank. "I need to be straight forward with you, though. I'm not someone that beats around the bush. Life is too short for not being truthful the first time around."
He smiled and reached over, patting my hand. "I couldn't agree more, but before you leave us, let me explain a few things and try my damnedest to win you over?"
"I don't want to waste your time, Frank." I pulled my hand slowly from his as not to offend him and dr
opped my hands into my lap. "I'm not working with Ethan again." I glanced over at Deza. "And I'm not working with you either. An agent is supposed to have my back. Darren did nothing for me and left me rotting on the vine, but at least I trusted him not to slide a knife into my back."
"Riley," Deza started, but I cut her off.
"No," I barked and turned back to Frank. "Get to the point so we can go our separate ways. I've had two weeks to think long and hard about everything that happened, and I'm not working with Eon anymore. I'm sorry if that means you're taking me to court, or anything else. I'm broke and don't have shit to my name but the money you deposited in my account a few weeks ago. It's still there. Most of it at least. Take it back. It's all I've got."
Frank's phone buzzed, and he glanced down and let out a long sigh. "Hold that thought. I'll be right back." He stood and walked off as I started to protest.
The last thing in the world I wanted was to be sitting at a table with Deza. She should have had my best interest at heart, including some part of my personal situation, but she didn't. She'd been trying to turn me away from Ethan since day one. I should have thanked her because things wouldn't have worked out between us anyway.
"Riley."
"Don't talk to me." I picked up my menu and glanced down at it as my stomach soured. I was horrible at being a bitch to people. If I gave her too much room to explain herself, I would give in. It was the main reason why I wasn't going back on set. Ethan would stand in front of me and apologize, tell me that he did have feelings for me, and like a big idiot, I'd be back in his bed that night, giving him anything he wanted.
No. It was time to grow up. Time to start living for myself and that meant choosing who got a spot in my life. I was done simply accepting fate.
"Just five minutes." Her voice broke. "Just give me five minutes to explain."
"Explain what?" I half-yelled, not giving a shit who was walking by or sitting near us. "Explain how you took advantage of the situation of being my agent? If anyone should have cared about me, it was fucking you."
"And I do care about you." She reached up and wiped her tears, her hands shaking a little. "I didn't think that day. Darren has been the only man in my life that I have ever loved. I messed up years ago by not working things out with him, and my life has been a mess since. You guys don't see that part. You see me joking with Ethan and coaching you and other new actors. You don't see me crying myself to sleep because the one thing I want in my life isn't mine."
"Ethan?" I bit out sarcastically, hating myself for making her cry.
"No. He's like a brother to me. I told you that."
"I don't think I would ever get caught in a situation where tonguing my brother in public would be appropriate. It just wouldn't occur to me." I lifted my eyebrow and tilted my head to the side. "What the fuck would possess you to do something like that besides love?"
"Nothing would. It was love that drove me to act like an idiot." She dropped her chin to her chest and let out a long sigh. "And because of it, I've messed up everything. Ethan isn't the same around me, Frank's upset, and worst of all, you think I let you down." She glanced back up at me. "That I lied to you."
"You did lie to me. You told me you didn't have feelings for Ethan, and yet I knew you did. You've tried to stop me from caring about him beyond the movie since I started."
"For your own good. I knew one of you would end up hurt." She brushed her long, dark hair over her shoulder and leaned back. "I didn't expect both of you to end up heartbroken."
"Well, yippee for you. You got a two-for-one." I glared at her. "Stop talking to me, or you can tell Frank why I'm not still sitting here, waiting for him to come back."
"One more thing." She reached out and grabbed my hand as I started to get up. "It wasn't my love for Ethan that turned me into a fool that day. It was for Darren. He was there with some beautiful blonde woman with big boobs and a great smile. I overreacted when he insinuated that Ethan and I were together. He's been jealous of Ethan for as long as I've been his agent."
"Why do you think I care about this?" I pulled my arm from her grasp as Frank walked back toward us. "You got what you wanted. Ethan and I are apart-"
"But you don't have to be, Riley." She stood up. "He loves you, and he's a good man. He deserves a second chance. I fucked you both over by not thinking about it, and for that, I'm so far beyond sorry. But what Clayton did was vicious, and you fell for it." She crossed her arms over her chest. "You don't have to forgive me, and you don't have to let me be your agent anymore, but you need to reconcile this with Ethan. He doesn't deserve what is happening to him. Neither do you."
Her words took the wind from my sails, and I dropped back down into my chair. Sadness washed over me, and I let out a long, painful sigh and leaned back. "I don't know what to think anymore. I keep wanting to believe something good can come from this, but I don't want any more heartache in my life. I can't handle it."
"Hey. What did I miss." Frank sat down and gave me a fatherly look. "Hey. You okay?"
"No." I pressed my fingers to my lips to keep them from quivering. "I just want to run away. As fast as I can for as far as I can go."
"I get that." Deza sat back down and ran her hands down her face before reaching out and taking my hands in hers. "Look at me."
"I'm still so angry." I forced myself to look at her. She hadn't kissed Ethan out of malice or love. She'd done it to make Darren jealous. I believed her. I'd seen the way he affected her, heard some of the sob stories and understood. Love sucked completely, and Deza was trapped in her own form of hell because the man she loved wasn't hers anymore.
"I know you are, and if you never forgive me, I deserve that, but hear me clearly." A tear rolled down her pretty cheek. "I didn't kiss Ethan because of any other reason than to make Darren jealous. It was stupid and selfish, and honestly... gross."
I snorted as Frank belted out a quick laugh. "Liar."
"No." She shook her head. "He was tense, and his lips were pursed. He was completely uncomfortable, and I know why now."
"Why?" I whispered and tried to let the animosity in me fade. I didn't need the dark emotions that had flooded my soul and torn me apart over the last week. I wasn't that girl. No matter how badly I should have been. Life had been unfair, but the soft whisper of truth in my head said that everyone's life was at times. This too shall pass.
"Because he doesn't want to kiss anyone, but you." She squeezed my hands. "It's going to be really interesting once you guys fix this between you and the movie is over. I highly doubt he's going to want to star across from anyone else if there is a lovemaking scene or a kiss."
I stiffened at the thought.
Frank jumped in as Deza released my hands. "Hey, kiddo. We're leaving for San Diego in a few minutes. I'd really love for you to come with us and just see if you can muster up the will to wrap this thing up. I know there's a ton going on between you and Ethan, but let it fuel your finale. You deserve all the best things in life, and whether that's our boy or not, it's still fame. You're a fantastic actress, and you have a lot of living ahead of you, but you have a lot of films yet to come. Let's not throw away this gift you have. Hmm? Can you at least come down and try it out? If we get there and you're one hundred percent sure that you're out, we'll go back to Eon and fight for you." He nodded toward Deza. "We both will."
Deza shook her head in agreement. "And I'm going to add one more thing to Frank's request."
"Deza." He reached out and touched Deza's arm, shaking his head 'no.'
"Give Ethan a chance to explain himself." Her eyes filled with tears again. "The thing that happened during the rain storm wasn't fair. He's a good man and has lived a really hard life. Love has never come easily to him, and yet to see him in love for the first time leaves me breathless. It's better than the best film I've ever seen. It's real life. It's breathtaking."
"I'll come to San Diego." I took a shaky breath. "That's as far as I'm willing to promise."
"And me and you?" Deza
asked, and I had to love her for being ballsy enough not to leave things undone, unfinished.
"We're good. I think." I picked up the menu and tucked away my worries. She hadn't attacked me, but one thing was for sure... Clayton had attacked Ethan, and I'd helped him do it.
Chapter 5
Ethan
Liam turned and smiled as we stood at the edge of the water in San Diego. The ride down had been good for me, and my brother knew me well enough to keep his trap shut. I'd rolled the windows down and let the sun chase away the black shadow crawling across my life.
"See? You feel better, don't you?" He reached out and squeezed my shoulder.
"Yeah. I do." I glanced out at the ocean as white tipped waves crashed into the shoreline. I wanted Riley with me. Standing in front of me. My arms around her shoulder, her soft ass pressed against me as her hair blew in my face. What I wouldn’t give for a do-over.
"And you know what would make you feel even better?" He smiled and lifted his hands, waving at someone. "Pussy."
"Oh shit." I glanced down the way to see two girls in bikinis so small that they shouldn't have spent the money to buy them. Scraps of cloth that most likely cost them a couple hundred dollars each. "Dude. No. I'm not in the-"
"Come on over." He moved around me. "Shut the fuck up and follow my lead."
"Suck my nuts." I turned back out to the water and took a step in, leaning down to pick up a shell I thought Riley might like. I prayed in the back of my mind that she would show up for filming so that I could at least try and salvage a friendship with her.
If I could get her past the hurt of what happened with Deza, and remind her that I was not at fault for that shit, then maybe she would let me back in. We'd been so good together. Outside of the delicious lust, she was my equal, my exact match in life.
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