“Oh, okay, thanks. Mrs. Cavanaugh makes your breakfast every morning, but when you don’t show, she feeds it to the stray dog. Griff thanks you.”
His hands rake down my arms, leaving goose pimples in their wake. “We need to talk. I am so sorry for not...” He lets out a breath. “I had stuff to resolve, and it’s been taking longer than I thought it would.”
“No need.” With my back still to him, I have the courage to say, “I met Willow.”
His hands grip my arms tighter.
“She’s so... interesting.”
“Yes, she is.”
“I see why you... never mind. None of my business.” I scrub the same spot on the counter for the tenth time. “Have you two had a chance to catch up?” I wiggle out of his arms and toss the supplies into a box under the counter. I pour myself a glass of tea and guzzle it, waiting for his reply.
He won’t stop taking me in, and he won’t leave more than one inch of distance between us. I face the sink and wash my glass. Again, his hands are on me. They rest on my shoulders.
“We’ve had a chance to clear the air.”
I let out a deep chuckle. “I bet you have. I’m real happy for you, Gunnar.” Not really.
“Andie, please look at me.”
I hang my head low as I dry my glass. “She wants you, Gunnar. I want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy. Will Willow really make you happy?” My breath hitches. Gah. I hate it when I sound so girly.
“I haven’t been happy in so long, I don’t remember what it feels like, but yes, she does want me.”
My heart falls into my shoes. He said what I knew he was going to say, but I was hoping he wouldn’t. I can’t blame him. She’s gorgeous and tall, and by the way she dresses, she must be very successful. And she’s the ghost that’s been haunting him. I was the placeholder until she came back.
I should be happy. This makes selling the property and leaving this town all the easier. Without Gunnar in the mix, I don’t have anything to hold me here. This is the best outcome. This is what I need. I should be happy about this.
He squeezes my shoulders, and after a deep breath, he says, “She wants me, but I want you.”
I let out a snort. “So that’s why you haven’t stopped by all week? Because you... want me. Makes perfect sense.”
He swings me around so I have to face him. His eyes are stormy, and his breath comes out fast, tickling my nose. “I didn’t want her to mess with you, but I guess it happened, anyway. Again, I’m sorry I didn’t stop by, but I was trying to keep her away from you.”
“I’m a big girl from the south side of Boston. Trust me. I can take care of myself.” All but my heart.
His eyes undress me. I can’t breathe. My heart beats way past a marathon pace. He leans in to me, resting his forehead against mine.
I close my eyes and soak in the contact. “Why do you want to be with me?”
He chuckles and kisses my nose. “Because.”
“Did she stay at your house?”
He growls.
“It was actually a relief for the blog to be about someone other than me.”
“Yes, she stayed over the other night, but if you knew her history, you would understand. Nothing happened. I made it very clear I didn’t want her.” He blows out a breath. “I still don’t want her.”
I bow my head, trying to figure out what I believe and what’s completely a line. He takes his index finger and tips my chin up so he can see my eyes. He has no reason to lie to me. If he wants Willow, there’s nothing to stop him from getting his first love back. But he’s not running to her. He’s here, with me, and that’s enough for me.
I tilt my head up to get a better view of the desire in his eyes. His lips touch mine, and I had forgotten how supple they are. He slides his hands through my hair, removing my ponytail holder. My hands roam under his shirt, and he groans.
He whispers in my ear, “When I say I want you, I mean, well, you know.”
Oh. My. God. I can’t make my mouth say anything. I nod. He holds up a finger for me to stay still. He rushes over to pick up his gym bag. “There are some things in here we might need.”
I put a hand on my hip. “Officer, I do not do bondage. So if your handcuffs are in there, you can forget about it.”
He slings the bag over his shoulder, takes me by the hand, and leads me upstairs. “You have a dirty mind, Miss Carson. What’s in here is more of the latex variety. Trust me. I think you’ll want it.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
Gunnar
When I kick the door closed behind us, it slams a little louder than I mean for it to. A picture frame on the wall tilts to the side. I guess I’m more eager than I want to admit. Andie’s arms are clenched tightly around her middle, and she trains her eyes on the floor.
“Sugar, look at me.”
She glances up, and I know I’ve made the right decision. She holds my heart now, and it feels right. It’s been so long since I’ve wanted to be with a woman, wanted to hold her, make love to her. I’ve had boatloads of sex since Willow left me, but none of it could thaw my heart. Andie walks into my life, and I’m alive again.
“I know we’ve only known each other a few weeks, so we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Okay?”
She leaps into my arms. Her legs wrap around my waist, and she kisses me hard on the lips. “I want you, Gunnar.”
I pull away from her. “You said my name with an R at the end. Gunnar, not Gaannah.”
She smirks. “I guess you’re wearing off on me.”
I kiss up and down her neck. “Stop teasing me.”
I walk us to her bed and plant her feet on the floor. She clutches the hem of my T-shirt and slides it over my head then flings it across the room. She gasps when she sees my bare chest. Score one point for me. All those hours in the gym pay off with that one delicate expression. Now it’s my turn. My fingers brush across her bare skin on purpose as I take my sweet time removing her T-shirt. God, she’s beautiful—petite and fit. And her breaths make her breasts move up and down, driving me crazy. I want to rip off that bra so fast, but I need some bit of control, or we won’t even get to use any of those condoms I brought.
She holds on to my arm with one hand while she struggles to remove one sneaker at a time. I toe my shoes off and peel out of my socks. We stand there, staring at each other. She is only wearing sexy faded cutoff jeans and a bra, and I’m wearing nothing but gym shorts with a very large bulge in the front that has not gone unnoticed. She licks her lips, taking her deadly sweet time unhooking her bra. When she throws it at my face, I almost pass out at the beauty standing before me. I toss the bra to the side and wrap my arms around her body. Skin to skin with Andie is where I want to be for the rest of my life.
She pushes me backward onto the bed. The mattress squeaks and bounces with my weight before the bed frame cracks, sending me crashing down, along with the bed, onto the floor. My feet fly in the air as I hang on with all my strength to the side of the mattress, with only my pride hurt.
Andie gasps with laughter and flops beside me, tears rolling down her cheeks. “How am I ever going to explain this?” She kicks her leg in the air as another round of giggles bursts through her mouth. She claps her hands. “Be aggressive. Be, be aggressive.”
I pull her to me, our feet still higher than our heads. “That’s exactly what I plan to do.”
Her eyes flick up to mine. Doubt falls on her face.
“You, Andie, are the most beautiful person I have ever known.”
She grabs my face and kisses me so hard, I think I’m going to be bruised, but I don’t care. My hands roam, and so do hers. In a single flick, I unbutton her jeans and help her shimmy out of them. Have mercy. Pink lace. I’m going to be a dead man by morning. She fiddles with my shorts, and I bat her hand away. If she does that, I’ll be a goner in five seconds flat.
“Not yet, darlin’.”
I stand to drag the mattress onto the floor with Andie still on i
t. She lets out a squeal. I crawl back to her and leave a trail of kisses down her neck, on each ripe breast, and down her stomach. Her sexy moans make me melt into her. I’m glad I brought an entire pack of condoms because one foil package will never be enough to satisfy either one of us. Not tonight. Not ever.
I DRAW FIGURE EIGHTS on Andie’s bare stomach as she plays footsie with me. I don’t care how late it is or that I have to work in the morning. All I care about is that I’m here in Andie’s bed, or rather on her mattress, making love to her over and over. I’m floating, and I never want to land. I think I’ve found my happy place.
Her stomach growls. “Sorry.” She plants another kiss on my shoulder. “I’ve worked up an appetite.”
“Me too.” I stand up, and her eyes get big as she stares at my package. If she stares long enough, it will be an even larger package.
“You’re so... perfect.”
Heat flushes my face. “Far from perfect, sugar.” And if she ever hears my Northwestern secret, she’ll agree. “How about I steal some food from the shop downstairs? Do you think the owner would mind?”
Andie giggles. “I’ll make sure she doesn’t even know it.”
I sling on my boxer-briefs and shorts and back out of the room. “Be right back.”
In record time, I haul butt downstairs, grab some day-old bagels and a carton of milk, and take the stairs two at a time to get back up to her. I slip on the throw rug, almost losing one bagel. She giggles the whole time. I hand her the bagels as I snuggle back onto the mattress with her. She nestles into the crook of my neck and tears off a bite of bagel, feeding me like a bird. I open the carton of milk, and we both drink straight from it.
“Your phone buzzed while you were down there.”
“It can wait.” God, it had better not be Willow calling me. Talk about ruining the moment. “I need to be honest with you.”
She stuffs a piece of bagel in her mouth. “This can’t be fun.”
“After Willow left me, I was... I didn’t take it well. I did things I’m not proud of.”
She swallows, digesting my words. “Had to numb the pain?”
“Yeah.” I offer her the carton of milk. “When Willow left me, I did some really stupid stuff. One hookup after another, hoping it would make me numb. And it did, but I’m done being numb. I was done way before you showed up, but you... you sealed the deal.”
She cranes her neck to meet my gaze and bats those eyes. “Aww, shucks.” We sit in silence for a moment before she adds, “Can I be honest with you?”
“Of course.”
Andie clears her throat. “Not to bring down the mood, but when you left to get the food, I thought you were...”
“Leaving?”
“Yeah. That’s the standard operating procedure.”
I roll over on top of her so we’re nose to nose again. “I’m not going anywhere. I want you to know that I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”
I tickle her and take a bite out of her bagel.
She squeezes her eyes shut. “Anyone?”
“Anyone. You make me happy.”
She flings her arms around my neck and crushes the milk carton between us. Cold milk oozes all over us. She squeals.
“God, that’s cold,” I say, laughing.
“These sheets need to be washed, anyway. How about a shower?” She wiggles her eyebrows up and down.
Uh, you don’t have to ask me twice.
“Try not to break my grandmother’s bathtub, okay?”
I pick her up and carry her to the bathroom, where we spend the next thirty minutes getting dirtier before we get clean. I can’t say this out loud because Andie would think I’m acting like a girl, but I’m already picking out a wedding date, china patterns, and the names of our first three children, all with the knowledge that she still may leave me.
LYING ON A CLEAN SHEET that we flung over the mattress, I kiss every inch of her body. I can never get enough. I hope she feels the same. By the glow of complete satisfaction and the way she can’t stop her fingers from roaming through my hair, I think she does.
“There’s something else in my past I want you to know about. Only one other person knows this.”
“Willow?”
“Yeah.” It’s time to be completely honest with Andie. Of all people, she would understand.
My phone buzzes again. Terrible timing. I groan.
“You better get that. Somebody really wants to talk to you.”
Son of a...
With one arm still around Andie’s waist, I fish out my phone from the gym bag on the floor. It’s five o’clock in the morning already. Crap. I answer the call and listen to my dispatcher.
“Yeah. Oh. Sorry. Battery died.”
She covers her mouth to stifle her giggles.
“Yeah, okay. Bye.”
I hang up the phone and groan. I find my shorts and sling them on fast before my body can react to seeing Andie stretching out on the mattress, the sheet sliding down to expose part of her right breast. Nice.
“Train wreck,” I say.
“I am not an expert by any means, but it wasn’t that bad, was it?”
I roll my eyes and fall on to her.
She giggles. “Be careful. You might break the... Oh, wait! You already did that.”
I prop myself up on my elbows and examine the disheveled, beautiful mess below me. “A train wreck off Highway 92.”
She yawns, and even with her mouth wide open, she’s gorgeous. “That’s terrible, I guess.”
I nibble on her ear. “No injuries except for Mr. Clairmont’s tractor.” Thank God it wasn’t anything more serious. I wasn’t on call, so I didn’t expect to get called away.
Her laughter bubbles out louder. “Give my condolences to Mr. Clairmont.”
“Will do.” I give her an Eskimo kiss and force myself off of her. “I better go while I can.”
She yawns and props herself up with an elbow. “Bye, Gunnarrrrr.”
I lean down and kiss her one more time. “Bye, sugar.”
There’s no way I’m going to focus on work today. I hope no one notices the goofy grin on my face, but I really don’t care. Before noon, the whole town will know I am off the market permanently. Even Willow will leave me alone. But to have my record clean would make me hold my head up high again, and that would be nice. I have to decide if the price is worth losing whatever Andie and I have started.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Andie
My thigh muscles scream with every step I take down the stairs. I hurt so badly, I’m surprised I’m not bruised. Totally worth it. I haven’t had sex in forever, and I’ve never had it with that much passion. They sure do things differently down here in the South.
“Morning, Mrs. Cavanaugh,” I say, hobbling into the store.
She scans me up and down and grins. “Busy night?”
“You could say that.” I pull the notebook closer to me and train my eyes on my list of orders for the day. “Twelve orders for jam?” I throw on my apron. “Better get started.”
Without stopping her biscuit-making, she motions with her head toward the stove. “Lucky for you, I picked up your secret ingredient last night after bingo.”
I pull out the whiskey jar and bite my lip. “How did you know?”
“Mary Grace thought she was sneaky, but why else would she have all that booze around? She was a teetotaler.”
Realizing she could have put me out of my misery by revealing this weeks ago should make me angry, but it doesn’t. I had to figure it out on my own. I hide the bottle under the counter and give Mrs. Cavanaugh a big kiss on the cheek.
“What was that for?”
“For being so sweet to me. I can never thank you enough for what you’ve done for me and what you meant to Granny.”
She focuses on the counter and sighs. “She was my best friend, and you’re so much like her.”
I give her shoulders a squeeze. “Thank you, Mrs. Cavanaugh.”
She
slams down the wooden spoon and huffs. “When are you going to call me by my first name?”
I blink. “I thought I was being polite. My Southern book says it’s proper manners to call someone by their last name until they tell you to do otherwise.”
“I’m telling you now.”
“There’s one problem with that.”
“Hmm. What’s that?” She rolls out the biscuit dough, and I hand her the dough cutter.
“I don’t know your name.”
She turns to me and chuckles. I wipe some flour off her plump cheek.
“Etta. My name’s Etta.”
I stand up tall. “Okay, then. Thank you, Etta.”
She points the dough cutter my way. “It’s Miss Etta.”
I hold up my hands in defense. “Yes, ma’am. Miss Etta.” I kiss her cheek again. “Thank you,” I whisper.
She hums a hymn as she goes about her business. I scan around the shop and notice it’s emptier than usual. “I haven’t seen the Jackson sisters in a few days.”
“Jennifer is in the hospital.”
“Oh dear. What happened?”
Mrs. Cavanaugh lines the pan with the cutout dough. “She got real confused and passed out.”
My jaw drops. “When did this happen?”
“Yesterday.”
I slam the dish towel down on the counter. “Why didn’t you tell me? As much as they drive me crazy, I kind of like their special kind of crazy.”
She shrugs, putting the baking pan in the oven. “I thought you knew. Everybody knows.”
I throw my hands in the air in disgust. “Well, I’ll be. I guess I should have gone to the Piggly Wiggly last night.”
“Guess so.”
Gunnar walks in, and my knees buckle. I can’t stop the vision in my head of him completely naked on top of me only a few hours earlier. He winks, and I’m so glad I didn’t go to the Piggly Wiggly.
“Morning, Mrs. Cavanaugh, Andie.”
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