‘What a waste of time,’ said Mungoid. ‘I don’t want to watch this.’
‘I think I’d rather clean my hat,’ said Hunjah.
‘I think I’d rather watch you clean your hat,’ said Mungoid.
‘You’re right,’ said Borgon. ‘This is boring. I’ll see you all later.’
‘But we only just got here!’ said Grizzy. ‘Don’t go home now.’
‘Who said anything about going home?’ said Borgon. ‘I’m just going to liven things up a bit.’
Borgon pushed past the blue slaves guarding the steps. Before they could stop him, he was up on the stage.
‘Excuse me!’ he called out towards the Raggahoos.
‘Oh look!’ said Akabbah. ‘It’s the little fat boy with the smelly meat.’
A few people in the crowd laughed.
‘Get him off here!’ said Akabbah.
Two of the big blue slaves came to drag Borgon away, but Madreesh waved them back. She stood aside and watched as Borgon walked over to the tall savage with the zebra-skin trousers.
‘I’ve got something for you,’ said Borgon.
Akabbah and the others all drew their swords.
‘Go away,’ he said. ‘Go on, before you get killed.’
‘I told you before,’ said Borgon. ‘You can’t kill me while I’m holding this!’
He pulled the elephant tongue from his belt. It was still wet and nicely sticky.
‘I’ll kill you if I want to!’ shouted Akabbah.
The tall savage lunged forward, but …
SHPLOPP!
… Borgon had already thrown the tongue.
It hit Akabbah right in the face and stuck there. As the tall savage scraped the mess out of his eyes, Borgon caught the end of the sword in the curve of his axe blade. He gave it a sharp twist, the sword pinged free and Akabbah fell backwards.
Akabbah leapt up to attack again, then saw that the end of his sword was curled up. He tried to stab it into Borgon’s stomach, but it just rolled up even more and made a little DOY YOY YOING! noise.
‘Ha ha ha!’ laughed the crowd. Even the other three Raggahoos at the back of the stage had their hands over their mouths, trying to hide the giggles.
Borgon tucked his axe back into his belt.
‘Job done,’ he said.
Borgon turned to leave the stage but the dame stopped him.
‘Going already?’ she said. ‘I thought you were a contestant.’
‘Do I look like one of them?’ asked Borgon, pointing at the four Raggahoos in their zebra skins.
‘No, but the trials are open to any savage,’ said Madreesh.
‘Have a go!’ shouted Eyepatch Woman.
‘Yeah, get stuck in there!’ called out Mr Rusty Teeth.
‘The more the merrier!’ shouted Spike-Head Man.
The whole crowd began to cheer, but Borgon wasn’t interested.
‘No thanks,’ he said to the dame. ‘I thought there would be loads of tough savages doing these trials, but I can’t be bothered to take on this bunch of damp-panted dandies.’
‘Ha ha ha!’ laughed the crowd.
Akabbah jumped in front of Borgon.
‘Hold it right there,’ he said. ‘If you think these trials are so soft, why don’t you have a go?’
‘Because I’m going to watch my friend clean his hat,’ said Borgon. ‘It’ll be far more exciting than anything you lot can do.’
He pushed past the lanky savage.
‘Very funny,’ said Akabbah. ‘Because I say you’re scared.’
Borgon stopped.
‘Scared?’ he repeated. ‘I’m a BARBARIAN. I’m not scared of anything.’
‘Oh no?’ said Akabbah. ‘Then let’s sort this out once and for all. I challenge you to a combat trial! Right here and right now.’
One of the other Raggahoos tossed Akabbah a new sword. In a flash, Borgon’s axe was back in his hand.
‘Watch your back, Borgon!’ shouted Mungoid from the crowd.
Sure enough, the other three Raggahoos were also pointing their swords at Borgon.
‘Bring them ON!’ shouted Borgon.
‘Hooray!’ cheered the crowd.
‘STOP!’ commanded the dame. ‘We are looking for a champion, not a dead body.’
‘You’re going to get FOUR dead bodies,’ said Borgon. ‘YARGHHHH!’
He charged across the stage waving his axe. The Raggahoos all leapt backwards in terror, but the dame flicked out the end of her staff and caught Borgon round the ankle. He fell flat on his face.
WHEEE BLAM!
‘Ha ha ha!’ laughed everyone.
TUB–ARP! went the blue slave.
Of course Borgon wasn’t laughing, but neither were the Raggahoos. The tall savages all looked a bit shocked.
‘Tell me, barbarian,’ said the dame. ‘What is your name?’
Borgon was too cross to answer, so Mungoid answered for him.
‘He’s Borgon the Axeboy,’ he shouted.
‘Borgon!’ smiled the dame. ‘Would you like to take part in the trials?’
‘Oh go on, Borgon!’ shouted Mungoid. ‘Do it!’
‘Yeah, go on!’ said Hunjah. ‘I can always clean my hat later.’
Borgon shook his head.
‘Are you sure?’ asked Madreesh. ‘Everyone here would really appreciate it.’
A big cheer went up from the crowd.
‘Everyone?’ said Borgon.
The dame looked over to where the four Raggahoos were skulking at the far end of the stage. The corner of her mouth curved into a sneaky smile. ‘Well, there are four people who’d rather you didn’t,’ she admitted.
Borgon grinned.
‘Then I’ll do it!’ he said.
The Mountains of Chaos
The vultures were still hovering high up above the stage. They had been watching everything with great interest, especially when Borgon had got his axe out. The vultures weren’t silly. With a bit of luck there would soon be something on the stage for them to eat!
Down in the crowd, Grizzy was reading her Book of All Things.
‘Borgon’s going to make a real fool of himself,’ said Grizzy. ‘He won’t even pass the first trial.’
‘Why not?’ asked Mungoid.
‘It’s a sort of race,’ said Grizzy. ‘How is little fat Borgon going to keep up with that lot?’
‘Simple,’ said Mungoid. ‘Borgon’s a barbarian. If he can’t do something the right way, he’ll do it the wrong way.’
‘I still can’t see how Borgon will get through this,’ said Grizzy, checking her book. ‘First they send a Bigfoot slave up the mountains. He lays out a trail of blue stones, and he leaves some giant rubies at the top. Once he’s got back, the challengers have to race up to collect a ruby each to show they’ve been there. The last one back loses.’
‘Why do they send a Bigfoot?’ asked Hunjah.
‘Because the Bigfoots know their way around,’ said Grizzy. ‘And those are the Mountains of Chaos. A lot of people go there and never find their way back again.’
‘So they die?’ said Hunjah.
‘Of course,’ said Grizzy. ‘And if you die you’re not allowed to do the next trial. That’s the rules.’
‘Look!’ said Mungoid. ‘There’s the Bigfoot coming back now. They’ll soon be off.’
Sure enough a tall hairy savage was sprinting back from the mountains, dropping blue stones along the way.
Up on the stage, Borgon had picked up the elephant tongue and was giving it a good chew. Akabbah had gathered the other three Raggahoos together in the corner and was whispering to them.
‘Hey, Borgon!’ shouted Mungoid. ‘You be careful. That lot are up to something.’
‘Thank goodness!’ grinned Borgon. ‘It would be boring if they weren’t.’
TUB-ARP went the trumpet.
‘Contenders, prepare!’ ordered the dame.
Borgon and the Raggahoos lined up at the edge of the stage, ready to leap off and run to the mountain
s.
TUB-ARP went the trumpet again.
‘GO!’ shouted everybody.
So they went.
Borgon and the Raggahoos raced along the trail of blue stones. Akabbah was in front, but Borgon was keeping right on his heels. The chubby little barbarian was faster than he looked.
‘Give up now,’ said Akabbah. ‘You’ll never make it to the top!’
‘Why not?’ puffed Borgon. ‘I’m as fit as any of you.’
‘Ha!’ laughed Akabbah. ‘Do you really think we’re going to let you get there?’
They followed the trail as it twisted and turned up the mountain slope between a set of giant boulders. As soon as they were out of sight of the stage, Akabbah spun round and caught Borgon with a surprise flying kick. Borgon fell over, and before he could get up, the other three had pounced on him and pinned him down.
‘You just stay there like a good boy,’ laughed Akabbah.
The tall savage dashed ahead, leaving the others sitting on Borgon.
‘YARGHHHH!’ cried Borgon. He twisted and kicked, and finally managed to throw them off. He leapt up, waving his axe. The three savages quickly retreated back down the path.
‘If you want a fight, then get your swords out,’ said Borgon. ‘But be quick, because I’ve got a ruby to collect.’
The three savages shook their heads nervously.
‘Please yourselves,’ said Borgon, then he left them and ran off up the mountain.
The blue stones took him zigzagging in and out of rock stacks, ducking under arches, scrambling up slopes and then down into a long dark tunnel. Borgon was just coming out the other end when he tripped on something and fell with a clatter.
It was a skeleton, still wearing a faded green dress and a big sun hat and clutching an empty picnic bag. Oh dear. Some poor lady had obviously thought the mountains were a nice place to wander round and have a spot of lunch. But there had been too much wandering and not enough lunch.
Borgon got back on his feet, and ran out of the tunnel. He found himself making his way along a ledge. On one side was a steep rock wall, on the other was a deep dark crack in the ground. The ledge was getting narrower and narrower and then …
KURR-EEEEK!
Borgon looked up to see a zebra-trousered leg kick a heavy stone slab down towards him. There was no time to get away. All Borgon could do was swing his axe upwards as hard as he could.
KADD A-RACK!
The axe smashed the slab into dust. Borgon pushed himself against the wall, so he was out of sight from above, then cried out as if he were falling into the deep dark crack.
‘ARGHHHHHHHHH!’
‘Ha ha ha!’ came Akabbah’s voice from above. ‘Goodbye for ever, chubby boy.’
Borgon heard Akabbah run off, then he smiled to himself. If Akabbah thought he was dead, he wouldn’t try to ambush him again. Good.
Borgon followed the trail until he saw Akabbah in the distance, jogging up to the top of a rocky peak. Akabbah stopped beside an old tree stump, then he picked something off the top of it. He tucked it into his shirt, then raised his face towards the sky.
‘RAGGA RAGGA HOO HOO!’ he cheered triumphantly. ‘RAGGA RAGGA HOO HOO!’
The sound echoed around the rocks from all sides. From somewhere in the distance far below came three voices in reply:
RAGGA RAGGA HOO HOO!
Akabbah had told the others he’d reached the end of the trail.
Those zebra legs were already running back down the path, so Borgon needed to hide. Unfortunately there was no little cave to slip into or rock stack to duck behind. Borgon had to think quickly – where could he go?
PUDDOB! PUDDOB! PUDDOB! Akabbah’s footsteps thudded along the narrow ledge, then they went into the tunnel and passed the skeleton in the faded green dress and big sun hat.
PUDDOB! PUDDOB! PUDDOB! The footsteps ran off into the distance.
It’s a shame Akabbah didn’t look back. He would have seen the skeleton take her hat off and slip out of her dress.
ARGHH!
But actually it was only Borgon who neatly dressed the skeleton again and gave her back her picnic bag.
‘Thanks,’ he said.
Borgon left his new friend in the tunnel and made his way up to the rocky peak. There was no sign of the other three Raggahoos coming, but surely they couldn’t be far behind him by now?
When Borgon got to the old tree stump, all he could see was an empty bird’s nest. He picked up the nest, looked underneath, turned it over and shook it, but there were no rubies inside.
‘Oh rattlesnakes!’ cursed Borgon.
Suddenly it was obvious what the Raggahoos had planned. Akabbah had taken all the rubies! No wonder the others hadn’t bothered to keep up with him. The four of them would go back with a ruby each and pretend they’d all been up the mountain. Borgon wouldn’t have one and there was nothing he could do about it.
The Yellow Egg
Borgon sat down on the tree stump and thought hard. Somehow he had to prove that he had reached the end of the trail, and the other three Raggahoos had not. He needed something to show the dame, but there was only the bird’s nest, a few stones and a dead scorpion, and they wouldn’t prove anything! Borgon kicked the tree stump in frustration.
KRUMPP!
Something rolled out from a hole in the bottom of the stump. It was a bright yellow egg. It must have fallen out of the nest when the Bigfoot had put the rubies in, or when Akabbah had taken them out. Either way, it was such a strange-looking thing, the Bigfoot would be sure to remember it!
Borgon picked up the egg, then made his way back to the skeleton in the tunnel. He borrowed the picnic bag and put the egg inside to keep it safe, then set off again, following the trail of blue stones. All around him was a jumble of rocky slopes, arches and boulders.
‘No wonder these are called the Mountains of Chaos!’ he said to himself.
In the distance, Borgon heard a triumphant cheer.
RAGGA RAGGA HOO HOO!
Obviously Akabbah had met up with the other Raggahoos and they were feeling very pleased with themselves.
‘You’ve made a big mistake, lads,’ muttered Borgon. ‘There’s nothing clever about trying to cheat a barbarian!’
Borgon followed the trail round a few boulders, under an arch and then stopped. The blue stones had come to an end. He ran ahead and stuck his head round a corner. No good. He came back and tried setting off in different directions. There were no more blue stones, just the ones leading back to the tree stump.
That sneaky zebra-legged freak! thought Borgon. He collected up the blue stones, just in case I survived!
Borgon dropped to his knees to see if there were any tracks he could follow. A footprint in the dust, a tiny scratch on a rock, even a few overturned pebbles would give him a clue. There was nothing.
The sun was getting hotter, and the rocks around him were starting to glow. Borgon thought of the poor woman in the tunnel. He didn’t want to end up like her! He HAD to find a way back.
Just then he felt something moving in the bag. He looked inside and saw that the eggshell was broken. At first Borgon thought he must have cracked it, but when he reached in to see, something nipped at his finger. He opened the bag right up. A little face was staring at him.
‘Quammy,’ it said.
It was a little yellow sand duck.
‘Quammy?’ it said again.
‘Do you mean mummy?’ asked Borgon. ‘I’m not your mummy!’
The little duck stuck her head out of the bag, then spotted something in the distant sky.
‘Quammy!’ she said. ‘Quammy quammy quammy!’
Borgon saw the duck was staring at two ragged dots.
‘Quammy,’ said the duck.
‘Your mummy isn’t one of those.’ said Borgon. ‘Those are just the vultures over the stage … Oh!’
Suddenly Borgon knew which way to go, and it was all thanks to the baby duck! He made his way towards the two dots, leaping over rocks and scra
mbling down ledges. It wasn’t long before he heard voices calling:
‘Borgon! Borgon, are you there?’
It was Grizzy and Mungoid and Hunjah.
Borgon slithered down the last slope, and they ran up to meet him.
‘We got worried!’ said Hunjah. ‘The others are already back.’
‘They said you were dead,’ said Grizzy.
‘Maybe I would have been, if it wasn’t for my new friend,’ said Borgon.
He opened the bag and the little yellow head popped up.
‘Quammy!’ said the duck.
‘Cool!’ said the others, and they gave her a stroke.
‘So what happened?’ asked Mungoid.
‘The Raggahoos cheated,’ said Borgon. ‘So I’m going to teach them a lesson.’
Borgon pulled his axe from his belt.
‘Hooray!’ cheered Mungoid and Hunjah, but Grizzy pulled a face.
‘Don’t do anything stupid,’ she said.
‘This is NOT stupid,’ said Borgon. ‘But it could be nasty, so hold my duck.’
He held the bag out towards Grizzy, but she refused to take it.
‘It IS stupid!’ she said. ‘You can’t just run up and attack the Raggahoos.’
‘Why not?’ demanded Borgon.
‘The dame won’t let you. And besides, everybody will just think you’re being a bad loser for not getting up the mountain.’
‘But I DID get up the mountain, and I can prove it!’ said Borgon.
‘It won’t be easy,’ said Grizzy. ‘The Raggahoos will all say you’re lying.’
‘They wouldn’t dare!’ said Borgon, waving his axe. ‘I’m a BARBARIAN!’
Borgon the Axeboy and the Prince's Shadow Page 2
