She watched as Vail flickered into view and placed his hand on a brick. Gertie didn’t move when the door slid open. “Gertie?” She jumped at the sound of his voice, accustomed to the silence that had permeated their journey.
She shook her head. “I can’t go in there.”
He took her hand and gave it a gentle tug. She didn’t budge. “I’m serious. I can’t go in there.” She took a step back and dropped his hand to wrap her arms around her stomach, as if they could keep the panic that was rising in her down. “If I go in there and we tell them…”
“We have to tell them.” Vail cut in.
Gertie shook her head again, desperation leaking into her voice. “Will you listen? If we go in there and we tell them, I’m going to stop being me. I won’t be Gertrude Penn anymore. I’ll be a stranger. My whole life will be different from what it was. It won’t be mine anymore. I won’t be me.”
He reached out to her, cupped her face between calloused palms. “You’ll still be you, Freckles.”
She shook her head, fighting tears. “I won’t. I’ll be Gertrude- no, not Gertrude, Victoria St. Clare, granddaughter of an executed monarch and just like that,” she snapped her fingers. “I’ll go from being a person to being a symbol. To something they can use against the Chancellor.”
His thumb brushed over her cheek, wiping away a tear as it escaped her lower lashes. “That’s not a bad thing,” he murmured.
Her fingers gripped at his wrist. “Please,” she whispered. “Please don’t tell them. Not yet. Give me some time to come to terms with this.”
He looked pained as he slowly shook his head. “I can’t. They need to know.”
She stared at him for a moment, disbelieving, before slapping his hands away from her and stepping back. “I’m not going in there. I’m going to talk to my grandfather. You can do what you want.”
She turned, making her way up the stairs and out into the dusky evening light.
Vail didn’t follow her.
Her grandfather was alone, sitting in his arm chair, idly flipping through the channels on the TV. When Gertie walked in he tapped a button on the remote and the screen went dark. He considered her for a moment, before standing and taking her hands.
“Are Mom and Dad out?” He nodded. She wanted him to kiss her on the cheek and pat her hand and for them to talk about how the tomatoes were coming along, or where they were in setting up the green bean trellises. If he did that she would know that she was Gertrude Penn and everything that had happened in the last few weeks was just coincidence, that there was another explanation beyond the impossible one that Lanie and Vail had come up with.
As the silence stretched between them, Gertie’s heart dropped. “Please, tell me it’s not true,” she whispered.
Her grandfather looked at her with watery green eyes, his lips trembling. He shook his head slowly. “I can’t.”
Gertie dropped his hands and sank down on the worn couch. “So, you aren’t my grandfather? Mom and Dad aren’t my parents?”
He sat next to her, clutching at her hands again. “I am your grandfather. You are my granddaughter in every way but one.”
Gertie felt sick to her stomach. She stared at the faded pink flowers on the couch willing the nausea away. “The most important way,” she whispered.
“I wouldn’t say that.” He squeezed her hands, trying to get her to look at him. “You came to us at the best possible time.”
Gertie wrapped her fingers around his, her black eyes searching his face. “Tell me.”
He sighed and leaned back, as though his bones couldn’t handle sitting up straight. “You know I was a gardener at the palace.” She nodded. “The Princess and I were close, very close. She worked with me in the garden almost every day. She was kind to me when no one else was, kinder than she needed to be. She was my friend. When she asked me to help her, I couldn’t say no. She knew that things were bad in the city, in the whole country. She knew that her father-in-law wouldn’t remain in power much longer and that no one in the royal family would be safe. Not even her unborn baby. I’d told her about your mother being pregnant and that we didn’t have the money to visit a doctor. We didn’t know the sex of the baby or if it would be twins.” Gertie could tell where he was going with this.
“So, after I was born, Princess Katherine had me smuggled out of 1st and given to you?”
He ran a shaking hand down his wrinkled face. “Basically.”
“But I’m an only child. What happened…” She couldn’t finish. What happened to the other baby? What happened to the baby that was his flesh and blood?
“There were complications during the birth. The baby was stillborn. I’d sent word to the palace that your mother was in labor. Someone showed up with you, I took you and passed the other- The other baby was returned to the palace. Your father was working. Your mother too exhausted to notice. I gave her you and she believed that you were hers. Two days later there was a funeral for the baby princess.”
Gertie was crying. Her grandfather was too. They’d given the baby of two farmers from 5th a royal funeral. Gertie had seen pictures, seen images of the King and Queen crying, while the Princess, her mother, looked on stony faced. Everyone had said that it was because the princess was in shock, but now Gertie knew it was because she was not burying her child.
When she was small, six or seven maybe, Gertie had a friend, a boy around her age, that had asked if Gertie was adopted. Fighting tears, she’d asked why he would have said such a thing, and he’d said she didn’t look anything like her parents, and she’d realized it was true. They were tall and wide, she was not.
She’d run straight home and to her parents and asked them why she looked so different from them, asked them if she was theirs. Her father and mother had laughed, scoffed at the mere idea. Her mother had assured that she was in labor for hours with Gertie and that she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Gertie was her daughter.
Gertie’s grandad had agreed. He’d been there for the birth.
A lie.
Maybe not a lie. He had been there for the birth of their daughter, but not for Gertie’s.
“I have kept you safe from them for seventeen years. I tried to protect you the best I could, to keep them from noticing you. You were too bright, and Mrs. Baggs noticed that. She approached us about it first and I told her not to submit the application for you. I knew you’d have to go through tests to move.”
Gertie nodded, in a daze. “You didn’t want me to go to 3rd. You said we could make ends meet with me in the fields with you.” He’d fought with her parents about it. Fought to keep her in 5th. To keep her out of the Chancellor’s radar.
He smoothed her hair. “I was so worried the entire time you were in that room. I thought for sure that they would find out, that they would know. But you weren’t arrested. You weren’t asked any out of the ordinary questions. They just let you move. And I thought, maybe Princess Katherine and I had gotten away with it.”
She looked at him, really looked. Seeing all the new lines on his face, the way his lips quivered, his watery eyes. She had grown up loving this face. It was more precious to her than her own. She thought about telling him that the government must have suspected something, that during those tests they must have seen something to make them suspect her of being an Extra. That they had been watching her probably from the moment she stepped out of that room six months ago.
He reached out his shaking hands to wipe the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. “I have loved you like my own. You are my family, Gertie, no matter what happens.”
And the words died on her tongue.
28
Gertie
It felt strange to walk through the streets without Vail. Gertie hadn’t noticed his absence on her way to 5th, but as she returned to 3rd she felt it. She missed the feel of his hand on her back or wrapped around her fingers, guiding her. Even though he had no doubt decided to tell Atkins everything that they had discovered through their meeting
with Lanie.
Gertie wasn’t sure if she could forgive him for that.
It was only a matter of time before the Office demanded her presence, so that they could find a way to use them her in their plans to take down Chancellor Duncan, more so than they had already.
She was almost to the checkpoint between 3rd and 4th, when she felt an invisible hand touch the small of her back. She sighed, relieved that he was with her again. She should have known that Vail would find her, that he wouldn’t stay away from her for long. The Office had probably sent him to bring her in.
Graves was probably furious that Vail hadn’t forced her into the elevator when he’d had the chance.
She didn’t say anything as he guided her through the streets, choosing to show her displeasure with him through the silent treatment. Childish, she knew, but it felt satisfying in the moment.
They were three blocks from the checkpoint when Vail urged her to take an unexpected right down an alley. “I came through the checkpoint,” She murmured. “I need to go back through it.”
He didn’t respond, just continued to move her along.
Something wasn’t right. Vail would have said made some smartass comment by now. Something’s wrong, a voice inside her whispered. She stopped walking, felt the person continue on without her, though their hand stayed in contact with her elbow. “Where are we going?” She asked.
No response.
“Answer me.”
The hands grabbed her roughly by the arms, tugged her forward. Gertie allowed them to pull her for a moment before bringing her arms up quickly, to break their grip. She kicked out at the same time hoping to catch them in some vital part of their body. They grunted in pain, as she spun and took off down the alley, heading for the checkpoint.
She just had to get there. Liam would probably be working. She could have him take her home.
Her dressy black flats slapped against the pavement, and Gertie gave a brief thanks that she hadn’t worn heels to 2nd. She’d be running barefoot if she had. She took a left turn onto a relatively busy street for the time of night. People gave her disgruntled looks as she flew by them, calling after her to watch where she was going. She ignored them, her eyes focused on the lights of the checkpoint.
The guards on either side of the door raised their guns when they saw her running toward them at full speed. “Freeze!”
She slid to a stop, holding up her hands. “Please, don’t shoot.” She gasped out. “Someone, someone was following me. I just- I come through here all the time.” They’re faces were vaguely familiar and she hoped that they would think the same about her, let her into the building.
They did not lower their weapons. One of the guards pushed a button on the communicator attached to his shoulder and spoke into it so quietly Gertie couldn’t hear what he said.
She glanced over her shoulder though she knew it was useless. Whoever she had just run away from could be standing three feet away from her and she would have no idea. A crowd of observers was forming across the street, anxious to see if the girl with honey blond hair would be shot down by the guards.
The door was pushed open and a familiar red headed figure emerged. Gertie was sure she’d never been so happy to see anyone in her life. She remained where she was, fought the urge to run straight at him. “Gertie?”
“Liam.” She nearly sobbed, knowing she was safe.
He motioned to the guards. “Put those down.” The muzzles of the guns dropped and Gertie took a tentative step forward. Liam held out a hand to her in invitation and she ran forward, nearly falling into his waiting arms.
“What happened?” he asked holding her close. She shook her head, buried her face against the rough fabric of his black uniform. He grasped her shoulders and held her away from him, his warm gold eyes searching her face. “Tell me what happened.”
Gertie took a shuddering breath, trying to calm her rapidly beating heart. “I was walking and someone grabbed me like they were going to try to take me somewhere.” Liam’s eyes shot to the crowd that had formed behind her, taking in every face so he could recall them later.
He glanced at one of the guards. “Go get as many names as you can.” Without waiting to see if he was obeyed, Liam guided Gertie into the building, behind the counter and into one of the holding rooms.
He pressed her into one of the grey metal chairs and took the one next to it, turning it so that he was facing toward her. Gertie glanced around, noted the cameras in the corners, their red lights indicating that they were on.
Liam reach out and took her hand, wrapping his fingers around hers. “Tell me everything.”
Gertie took another deep breath, trying to get her story straight. She couldn’t very well say that the person was invisible… Or could she? She didn’t need to mention that she had thought she knew the invisible person and she had walked with him willingly for a few minutes.
“I went to go visit my grandfather.”
“I saw you went through the checkpoint earlier.” He nodded.
“I was coming back and I was worried about him, he hasn’t been feeling well, so I wasn’t really paying attention to where I was going. I went down an alley I don’t normally take and someone grabbed me from behind and started pulling me. Somewhere. I kicked them and broke free and then ran here.”
“Did you see what they looked like?” He asked, his voice brusque, his body tense. This was the guardsman, not the Liam that flirted with her when she passed through the checkpoint.
Gertie shook her head. “I didn’t see anything. I was so scared I honestly didn’t pay that much attention.” She briefly wondered if she should be concerned with how easily she lied these days. She hadn’t been scared, not in the slightest. She’d known exactly what she’d needed to do to get away. The benefits of having a shade inside her, she supposed.
“Could you tell if it was a man or a woman?”
She glanced at the camera again, wondered if Dicie was watching her. “I couldn’t tell. I’m sorry, I’m not being very helpful. The thing is…” She paused, biting her lip. She looked down at their joined hands and just went with it. “I really didn’t see anything, because there was nothing to see. Whoever-Whoever it was they were invisible.” Liam pulled back slightly. And she hurried onward. “I know how crazy that sounds, trust me, I know. But there was just no one there, but they were there. I could feel them, just not see them.”
Liam shook his head, slowly, the harsh lights glinting off his dark red hair. “I believe you.” He sighed, considering. “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but we’ve been getting a lot of reports about Extras planning some sort of rebellion.”
She organized her face into a look of surprise. “I thought there were no more free Extras, that they were all killed or imprisoned.”
“Well, we thought that they were, but apparently, some escaped notice.” He ran his free hand over the stubble on his chin. “I suppose the question is, what they wanted with you?”
Gertie shrugged. “I have no idea.” Lies.
He stared at her for a minute, his gold eyes intense. His fingers brushed her cheek as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “If there is anything that you can think of, any reason at all, you need to let me know. I can’t protect you if I don’t know the truth.”
Gertie looked down and picked at a stray thread on her black satin pants. “I honestly can’t think of anything, Liam. I work for the government? Maybe they thought I could help them get access to something?” It was as close to the truth as she dared get. After all, that is what the Office had used her for.
He looked unconvinced. “Yeah, maybe.” He dropped her hand and stood up, paced around the table. “What about that guy at the bar?”
Gertie sighed, pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. “You’re bringing him up again?”
“Yes.” She flinched at his harsh tone. He’d never spoken to her like that before. “I am bringing him up again. I told you, he’s dangerous.”
Liam gave a laugh as he came back to sit in the chair facing her. “I think you are greatly underestimating yourself.” She felt her face flush, and couldn’t meet his eyes, so instead she stared at her knees. His hands came into view slowly, wrapping around her wrists to unwind them from her legs. Her feet slid to the floor and she glanced at the camera again. Please, don’t be watching.
She knew what was coming, probably before Liam even knew what he was doing. He tugged her toward him pulling her forward in her chair, his hands sliding up her arms to her face. Despite herself, Gertie felt a flutter in her stomach as he leaned forward and brushed her lips with his.
She didn’t pull away, but she also didn’t kiss him back. At least, not at first. As he deepened the kiss she couldn’t help it, her fingers crept up to his chest, felt his heart pounding against his ribs and she kissed him.
If she was honest with herself it was everything she had hoped it would be, with the exception of the location. She’d always thought their first kiss would be in the park huddled under a tree after getting caught in the rain or something equally as romantic. Physically, it was as good as she’d imagined.
He pulled back slightly, then dropped another quick kiss on her lips, his fingers caressing her cheeks. He sighed. “I’ve been wanting to do that since the first time I saw you.”
Her hands were still pressed against his chest. “Me too.” She breathed. And it was the truth.
She glanced at the camera again. Liam noticed. “That’s the fifth time you looked at the camera.” His eyes narrowed. “Do they make you nervous?”
Smoke Page 17
