I shook my head and reared back “No!” I gasped “No, I don’t want to!” I scrambled up the bed, desperate to get away from them “NOOOOOOOO!” I screamed as they came closer, now whispering my name “Ava, Ava, Ava, Ava….” Over and over, their high pitched shrieks tearing at my ears and I covered them with my hands “NOOOOOOO PLEASE!” I was trembling and sweat was pouring from every pore on my body “I DON’T WANT TO GO” I sobbed as I crushed my hands against my ears to block out their screeches.
Masons arms enveloped me and pulled me into him “Mason….stop them, they’re trying to take me…don’t let them. I don’t want to go…Mason pleaseeeee” I cried as he rocked me tightly to him “I won’t let them take you baby, I promise. I won’t let anybody hurt you Ava” he whispered in my ear but I shook my head vehemently “But you will…you let Dane hurt me…I know you will, you’ll let them drag me down there. I don’t want to go to hell Mason. I want to be in heaven with Katie and my mom…” I turned on to my knees and took his hands, begging him “Please help me” I pleaded and his face crumpled “Baby….please baby…Ava…” he sobbed.
Courtney came to me “Go Mason, I’ll take care of her” she told him but he shook his head “I’m not leaving her Courtney” he said but she pulled him away “Just ten minutes Mason, just until your mum gets here. Go get a drink or something; she’ll be fine with me. I promise” she urged and he sighed but nodded “Ten minutes. What the hell’s wrong with her Courtney?” he asked.
She squatted down in front of him and wiped his tears with her thumb “Mason she…she’s finally had enough. Her brain can’t cope with everything…she’s having a breakdown” she told him softly and he swallowed and bit his bottom lip “It’s my entire fault Courtney, I’ve done this to her!” he sobbed
“Go, go and take a break Mason. Go and sit with your babies, kiss them, snuggle them, just be with them for a little while” he gazed at her then sighed and stood “Shout me if you need me” he said and she nodded “I’ll be fine, go on” she turned to me and grasped my hands “I’m here Ava. I won’t let them take you babe. I promise. We’ll fight them off together” she told me.
I nodded frantically “Don’t let them Courtney. They want my soul, they want to take me and burn me. Don’t let them” I implored my eyes huge as I scanned the room at the shadows that refused to leave me. I huddled into Courtney, tight into her as she embraced me and I closed my eyes, shut them all out but I could still hear them, cackling and shrieking my name. I cringed at the sound “TELL THEM TO SHUT UP!!!!” I cried as I covered my ears again “Shush Ava” Courtney whispered as she clung to me “It’s okay babe, they’ll be gone soon” I looked at her, my eyes wide and delirious and nodded “Yes, Yes. They’ll go soon” I nodded again “Go!!!” I shouted to the shadows and I froze as a shadow merged into a shape, a human form and I gasped “Katie?”
I laughed and cried and reached for her “Katie, you came for me. I want to come with you Katie…I’m ready Hun” I scrambled towards her but Courtney held me back “No Ava” she said but I kept trying, I needed to get to Katie. She had come all this way for me, to help me and take me with her “I’m coming Katie” I cried but Courtneys arms got stronger
“Get off me” I shouted to her “I need to go with Katie” I snarled at her, a proper snarl with my teeth bared and spit flying “GET OFF ME!!!” I screamed at her but she wouldn’t let me go so I pushed her backwards. Her eyes widened and she shook her head slowly “Ava please…I’m pregnant Ava, don’t hurt me. I know you don’t want to” she beseeched but I looked at her in disgust “Then let me go!” I spat but she shook her head.
I slapped her and slapped her again “MASON” she screamed as I grabbed the top of her arms and shook her “LET ME GO” I screeched and scrambled off the bed and onto the floor, crawling desperately to Katie.
Masons arms slipped round me and he braced me securely “NOOOOOO!!” I screamed as Katie reached out to me one last time and then disappeared. I kicked and wrestled against him “She’s gone you fucking bastard…you fucking cunt…she went without me” I roared at him.
He still had a firm hold on me as he turned to Courtney “You okay?” he asked “Yeah, just a slap” she shrugged but her eyes filled with tears “Ring Sam” he stated bluntly and she nodded then left
“I hate you, I hate you” I spat at Mason as I struggled against him “I know Ava, I know and right fucking now, I fucking hate me too” he wrestled me onto the bed as the bedroom door opened and a woman I had never seen before looked at us.
Her eyes looked pained and worried “Help me” I begged her, I had no idea who she was but she looked like she might help, she had kind eyes “They’re trying to drag me into hell but I don’t want to go…Mason won’t let me go with Katie and I just want it to end…I want to die!!!” I sobbed and she nodded at me “I know Sweetie, I’m gonna make it all better for you” she smiled softly at me and stroked my hair.
“She’s very beautiful” she tipped her head at Mason and smiled softly, her eyes warm and gentle “I remember her but she…she was different then” she took a breath and cupped Masons cheek lovingly “Do you love her?” she asked him gently and he nodded “Help her mum, stop what she’s doing to herself, please…just…do something to help her” he begged and she nodded and turned back to me.
She stroked my arm “You have beautiful skin Ava…so soft” she said and I cocked my head as her voice mellowed me, soothed me; it was so soft and quiet as her soft strokes lulled me
“Yes. My skin belongs to Mason, I don’t think you’re allowed to touch me” I told her seriously. She smiled again as I felt Masons hard grip on my arm and I felt a sharp scratch against my skin.
I dropped my head back as whiteness shrouded my vision and my body relaxed, everything seemed to float and I could feel myself slipping “Thank Y…”
CHAPTER 41
My eyes were way too heavy and I felt sick, my mouth was extremely dry and my face was sore. What the hell? I groaned against the sunlight that was streaming through the open curtained window and I swallowed at the dryness but the effort was too much.
My body felt heavy and tired and I dragged myself to the edge of the bed and climbed onto the floor. I needed a drink desperately
“Whoa Ava” Mason appeared in front of me and lifted me back onto the bed “Stay there baby” he smiled softly at me and stroked my hair back “Drink” I rasped and he nodded and reached for a glass of water. He sat me against the headboard and placed the glass against my lips and I gulped greedily at it, the soothing liquid calming my throat instantly “Thank you” I smiled faintly at him and pursed his lips “How you feeling?” he asked hesitantly and I shrugged “My head hurts and I feel a bit sick. How much did I drink?” I squinted against the light in the room.
Mason walked over and pulled the blind closed. I rolled my head around my neck and tried to stand up but my legs felt like jelly “Ava…” Mason shot over to me and caught me before I collapsed “I need to pee Mason” I scowled. He nodded and wrapped an arm around my waist “I’ll take you” he stated as he scooped me up, deciding it was easier than walking me there.
He leant me against the wall as he pulled my shorts down and sat me on the toilet. He crouched in front of me as I peed, a faint smile lifted his lips and I smiled back and shrugged “You’ve seen worse” I said and his expression grew serious, his face was agonised and bleak and he gave me a gentle nod.
“Bath?” he asked as he drew a finger over my cheek, over the edge of my ear and across my jaw. I nodded “Stay sat” he ordered as he rose and turned on the bath taps, pouring in some bath crème and then turned back to me
“What did you do last night?” he asked quietly and I frowned at him “What do you mean?” I studied him and couldn’t quite work out his mood. He cocked his head “What’s the last thing you remember Ava?” he turned away and swirled the bath water. I shrugged “Erm…I got drunk and took a shower and Erm…” I wasn’t sure, everything was blank after my shower and I
scurried through my memories to recall my last actions last night.
Mason sighed and lifted the small mirror off the wall, the one he always used for shaving in and held it in front of me. I gasped and my eyes widened. I gingerly put a finger over one of the scratches, one of many and winced at the soreness.
I was covered in what looked like claw marks and deep scratches “What happened?” I asked hesitantly and I wondered if Dane had returned while I slept. He inhaled deeply “You did it Ava” he said quietly. I pulled a face at him “What?” he turned off the taps and helped me up, stripping me down and then swooped me up and gently placed me in the bath. He stripped naked and climbed in behind me. I stiffened as he pulled me back against his chest “Damn it Ava, relax” he said and I huffed but made myself lean back against him and the first touch of his bare skin touching mine brought out a deep sigh. I needed him, the closeness of him, the scent of him, and the feel of him and the security he surrounded me with.
I rested my head back on his shoulder and he smiled and kissed my head “Good girl” he whispered and I snuggled my head against his neck. “Ava…” he sighed “Mmmm” I whispered back “Baby, you need to see a doctor. I’ve made arrangements for you and I want no arguments Ava” he said slowly and I frowned “What the hell for Mason?” I asked as his legs curled around mine and his foot slipped up and down my calf. “Baby you…you had some sort of…hell! I don’t know what it was but it wasn’t good baby” I turned my head to look at him “Mason I was just drunk” his sad smile concerned me and I regarded him “What happened?” I asked warily.
His eyes fixed on mine “We think you had some sort of temporary break down Ava, you…you thought angels from hell were coming to take you away and…and you clawed at yourself, saying you had to get the evil out” he tightened his arms and legs round me and I wondered if he thought I was going to do a runner. “Baby, I was so scared, I didn’t understand what was happening and I…I had to call my mother out to sedate you” he confessed and I slipped around to face him, my body stretched out over his and his hands cupped my bottom to hold me up to him. I scanned his face “But you don’t…you don’t see your mother anymore” I narrowed my eyes on him “You never did tell me why but I can’t understand how you would call her out of the blue” he sighed and sucked on his lips “Ava…” he lifted a hand to my face and palmed my cheek tenderly “Ava, I was so frightened, I’ve never seen…it broke my heart to watch you…like that, you were terrified, really terrified baby and it was the only thing I could think of…to phone my mum. She came straight away and well, we talked, built a few bridges, you know” he shrugged and I smiled gently “I’m glad my fuck up’s came in useful” his face darkened immediately “Don’t say that Ava” he hissed and I shrank back a little “don’t ever say that again Ava” he slid backwards so he was sat up more and I was now kneeling between his knees “you said…you said you wanted to…to die Ava” he choked out and I looked away and he narrowed his eyes on me “How long have you felt like that Ava?” he asked slowly and I shrugged “Ava! I need the fucking truth!” he demanded “I don’t know Mason!” I shouted and stood up and climbed out of the bath “Leave it!” I asserted as I snatched up a towel.
He swiftly climbed out behind me and gripped my arms “God damn it Ava, talk to me, that’s the reason we’re in this mess because you bottle everything in until it breaks you and shatters your mind. You didn’t see yourself last night Ava, you smacked Courtney and shook her like a fucking doll!” he declared and my face paled “Oh my God” I shrank back against the vanity, my breathing escalating and my heart clenched “Relax, she’s fine but you weren’t you..You were…well anyway I’ve made you an appointment with a psychologist and you are going whether you like it or not. You need to talk about things baby, it’ll help I promise” I stared at him.
What the hell had happened last night? I couldn’t remember a single thing and the thought that I had hurt Courtney sickened me.
I pulled the towel round me and walked into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed my face with my hands and contemplated everything.
Mason knelt between my legs on the floor and took my hands in his, pulling them away from my face. He leant up and brushed his lips over mine “I need to say one thing Ava and I need you to accept what I say, okay?” he looked at me seriously “What happened with Dane and Lee and all the other filthy bastards that touched you, that hurt you…none of it and I mean NONE of it was your fault. You didn’t ask for it, you didn’t give off any signals to make them think you wanted it and you definitely didn’t deserve it. You understand Ava? It was nothing you did. Some people…well some people think because they want something it gives them the right to take it and they don’t care who they hurt while they take it. I don’t think you’re a whore, a slag or that you did anything to warrant everything that’s happened to you. You are the most loving, caring warm person I know Ava. You are not promiscuous, hell it took me some serious work to break through your shell. You never give yourself openly and flirting doesn’t come naturally for you, so NO you didn’t ask for it baby and that’s the reason I love you, because you have to care before you sleep with somebody, you have to care before you open yourself up so you definitely did not ask for everything you’ve gone through” he framed my face “I know I’ve let you down Ava, I know I was stupidly blind and let Dane hurt you but I promise I won’t let it happen again and I’m…I know I keep saying sorry baby but I am, wholly and utterly sorry for everything that I put you through…Dane, the drugs, Rebecca, the…the blonde and every other damn thing I’ve hurt you with” I rested my forehead against his and sighed “I know Mason but there’s one thing you don’t know” I swallowed “you saved my life…it’s as simple as that. My life before you was…well nothing. I didn’t feel, I didn’t live and I certainly didn’t love, but you…you’ve brought them all out Mason. You chipped away at my shell until it cracked open and I finally started to breathe. I can’t thank you enough for your patience and your love because without it I’d still be that empty soulless girl, so thank you, you woke me up inside baby” I brought my lips to his and kissed him with everything I felt, I needed him to understand. My hands slipped into his hair and I held him to me, devouring and loving him with my mouth. His hands slid into my hair and he wrapped his fingers round it as we held on to each other.
I pulled back and stroked his cheek with my thumb “Marry me Mason?” I asked softly. He pulled back and looked at me, his eyes wide and bright, his lips parted and his breathing heavy. He closed his eyes for a second and then opened them and gazed at me “You mean it Ava?” he asked quietly and I nodded “More than anything Mason, I love you and I can’t live without you. I need you, I want you and I die a little each time we’re apart. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. I’m yours…if you want me?” a large happy grin erupted on his face “Oh baby” he breathed and took me in another kiss, this time hard and full as he said yes in that kiss. His passion, his acceptance, his need and his love exploded into me through his kiss and I pulled him further into me
“Make love to me” I whispered and he pushed me slowly down onto the bed and his hands slid down me and opened my towel. His kisses lowered down to my jaw as he nibbled his way across it and his hand gently caressed me, his touch loving and gentle.
His mouth moved down my neck and he oh so softly sank his teeth into my skin. I moaned long and slow, my arousal coursing through me as I tugged gently on his hair. His lips found my hard and ready nipple and he gently stroked it with his tongue as his hand cupped and caressed me. I arched my back and pushed myself into his mouth. He sucked at me then softly blew on my wet nipple and I breathed heavily “I need you Mason, I need you inside me, with me” one hand slid down my belly and over my mound as he cupped me and stroked along my groove “Oh baby, you’re so ready for me” he whispered against my nipple as he continued to worship it. I nodded and pulled him further up me “Now Mason please” I pleaded and his hands slid underneath me, li
fted me and nudged me further up the bed. He settled between my legs as I wrapped them around his hips and he gently pushed into me.
We both sighed heavily as we joined as one, our souls uniting and dancing together. His plunges were firm but gentle as he rocked into me; his mouth and teeth grazing my neck as I lifted my hips to meet his every thrust. “Oh God Ava, you feel so good” he breathed and sank his teeth into my shoulder delicately “Ahhhh” I moaned as I clutched his arse and pulled him deeper into me, right to the hilt and he groaned loudly “Baby, come with me” he breathed and he started to drive harder into me as we both hit fever pitch and our warm breaths collided as he took me in a fevered kiss as he ploughed into me. I felt one long push from him that ignited both our climaxes and we cried each other’s names together as we ground our hips into each other, the need to take each other deeper and I struggled to see where I ended and he started as our bodies entwined together, a mixture of limbs and love as my soul clung to his “I love you baby” I breathed into his neck “so so much Mason”.
He rolled us over so I was laid out on top of him and we fell asleep, Mason still buried deep inside me, our need to be joined for a little bit longer.
CHAPTER 42
Things settled down for a few of weeks and I was constantly looking over my shoulder for Dane but we hoped he had fulfilled his revenge and that was the end of things. Greg declared his undying love for Courtney and he asked her to marry him, so we had a double engagement party.
Katie and George were growing stronger and happier every day and Mason and I were thoroughly enjoying parenthood…they were an absolute joy. His mother had become a familiar figure in our lives as her and Mason tried to build back their relationship.
Tolerance (Heart of Stone) Page 28
