“Oh Hope, you are so beautiful. I love you so much baby.” I whispered as she continued to move her hips against mine.
Hope smiled as I ran my hands down to her small waist and began guiding her even harder. I watched as the grinding became rapid, Hope threw her head back and let out a beautiful cry. “Chance…”
When I heard that, I couldn’t help but finish myself. Hearing her say my name turned me on. It was like a direct order sent straight to my penis. This time Hope collapsed her body on top of mine. We were both breathing heavy, when we heard my door open.
I grabbed Hope, who was still attached to me by her legs, and lifted her up sticking her in the shower, then turned on the water and jumped in myself. I hope that whoever was here did not hear the water turning on after they had already walked in.
As Hope stood there in the shower behind me, I heard two sets of voices. We were caught, I just knew it. All I could think of was that my life was officially over.
I heard my sister’s voice first. “Chance? How long are you going to be in there?”
I stuck my head out from behind the curtain, even though she clearly was not standing in the bathroom. Then I realized Hope’s clothes were thrown all over my bedroom. This couldn’t get worse.
“I just got in. What’s up?” I tried to sound calm.
“Mark and I need to talk to you. We will just wait in the living room until you finish.” She yelled.
I looked down at Hope who appeared as if she was going to be sick. “I love you.” I whispered in her ear.
I pulled back and watched as she mouthed the same words to me. Figuring this might be our last time together, at least for a while until I either recovered from Mark beating the shit out of me, or somehow being arrested for sleeping with a minor, I started washing Hope’s hair. She closed her eyes and didn’t fight me. When I started to do my own and then wash my body, I saw the tears in her eyes. She knew why I was taking my time, and her fear matched mine. Before turning off the water, I gave her one last kiss over her lips.
“It will be okay. I promise.” I whispered.
I turned off the water and reached for a towel for Hope first. I got her out and grabbed a towel for myself. When I made it to the hallway I peeked out realizing Mark was sitting in a chair with his back facing us. Buffy was sitting across from him, not even noticing me standing in a towel. I grabbed Hope and led her into my bedroom so that she could get dressed at least.
Before I could even find shorts, she was already fully dressed, sitting on the edge of my bed. I threw on my shorts and kissed her one more time, trying not to get choked up over it.
When I headed out to the living room, I knew it had only been about ten minutes in total from the time they had come into the apartment. I threw on a t-shirt as I made my way into the room, where Buffy and Mark sat waiting.
“Morning you two. What’s up?” Even though I knew what was up. I tried not to look Mark in the eye as I sat down next to my sister.
Mark had both hands on the ends of the chairs arms. To me, it seemed like he was trying to control his temper. I could feel the beads of sweat already starting to form across my forehead, even though I had just got out of the shower. I didn’t care if he hauled off an hit me. I had gone against his word time and time again. There was no way he would understand how I felt about her. This could only end badly.
Chapter 44
Chance
I was prepared for anything. If he wanted to call me out about being with his daughter, I was going to tell him the truth. I was in love with her and probably had been since the first day I met her. She made me want to live again and I couldn’t imagine spending one day without her.
When his mouth opened, I hung my head high and waited.
“So as you know the wedding in just a month away. Your sister and I took the day yesterday and drove a few towns over to shop for Christmas. I realize that this may be too forward of me to ask, but I wanted to know if Hope had talked to you about school? I know that you help her study all of the time and I think it has been a big influence on her. Did you know she hates school?” Mark asked.
So far, I wasn’t getting the crap beat out of me.
“Yeah, she mentioned it a few times. And to answer your question, no, she never really talks about it. Why? What’s up?”
Mark looked over at Buffy and then back to me. “Chance I have some connections here in Virginia. I have made several calls on your behalf and I personally went to college with the baseball recruiter over at Virginia Tech. I know I should have talked to you first, but I felt so bad for sending you away to South Carolina. I want you to know that I trust you and that I am sorry.”
“I’m sorry. I am not following you?” I said.
“My friend, who is the recruiter, he knew of you Chance. He watched you play in high school, but you had already picked Penn State. Anyway, his short stop broke his leg last week and they say he won’t be able to play for at least a year. I told him how you lived with us and were planning on enrolling at the community college next semester. After explaining everything that happened, he pulled your transcripts and saw your high grade point average. They want you to play for them Chance, at least for one year. What do you say about that? Would you like to go back to school at a University instead of a community college?”
I was shocked. This had nothing to do with Hope, but actually everything to do with her. “I am kind of in shock right now. Do I need to give you an answer right now? I had already enrolled at the community college.” I said.
“He needs to know, before they look into other options Chance. I need to know by week end.”
I was in shock. Who was this guy? How did he know all of these important people? My mother always said ‘Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth’ and I finally got it! “Wow, well I want to say yes, but I think I need a couple days to think about it. I feel like I am dreaming.
“Why did you ask about Hope?” I had to ask.
“Well we figured if Hope saw you going there, she would want to follow. She looks up to you, almost like you are her brother.” Mark replied.
Holy shit! Her brother? He was so wrong…
“Okay, well give me a few days. I will let you know what I decide by lunch time.” I watched as he and Buffy got up and started leaving. “Mark thanks.” I said.
“We just want you to be happy Chance.” Buffy said as they walked out.
I watched them enter into the main house and locked my door. I needed to start doing that.
“Hope you can come out baby. They are gone now.”
My girlfriend came walking out of the bedroom. Her face was expressionless.
I grabbed her into my arms and kissed her on the forehead. “That was close. I have got to lock that door when you spend the night.”
Hope sat down on the couch and I sat across from her on the chair. “What are you going to do Chance?” She asked.
“It all depends.”
“On what?” She asked.
“On you silly. I don’t want to do this without you. I promised that I wouldn’t leave you again.” I stated.
“I can’t ask you to do that Chance. You have to make your decisions about what is best for you. I want you to be happy and I know how much it hurt you to have to stop playing ball. This is your second chance. You have to take it.” She explained.
“Hope, things are different now. My life is different now. I don’t want to do this without you.” I admitted. “Besides, I will have to live with roommates at a dorm. You are the only roommate that I want Hope. Don’t you get it? You are my future. I want to be with you for the rest of my life.” I confessed.
Hope stood up and faced me. “Chance…I can’t talk about this right now. I’m so sorry. I have to get out of here.”
I grabbed her hand and tried to keep her from leaving. Tears ran down her face. I didn’t understand what was happening. I thought she would be excited. Why was she running away?
“Hope please wait. Tell me what is
going on. Is it because we will be living apart? Please talk to me baby.” I begged.
“Chance, I can’t do this. I can’t take away your future when I don’t know what I want for mine. I’m so sorry but that also includes us. I love you, but I don’t know if I want this forever. I just don’t know. I am so sorry. I have to leave.” She said as she darted out of door.
I stood there in shock. What was happening? Did she just leave me?
I had just gone from citizen high to citizen low.
Hope
I couldn’t let him blow an opportunity like this. I did what I had to do. I lied.
Chance was everything to me and he was the only future that I wanted, but to see him struggle with a decision like that because of me, made me so angry. He should have said yes, even before speaking to me. The fact that he waited for my decision was wrong. I couldn’t be with him when I knew he would regret that decision forever.
Once he was enrolled and doing well I would tell him the truth. If he still even wanted me.
Suddenly, I realized what I may be giving up. I wanted to run back to him and tell him I was lying, but I couldn’t. I just kept running down the street, running from my reality. I was pushing Chance away, so that he could have a real second chance at a life that should have been his in the first place. Just because he met me didn’t mean he had to pass on it.
I had gotten about three blocks from my house, when I heard a familiar sound. Chances bike pulled up beside me. “Hope, what are you doing?” He demanded an answer.
“Chance please, I can’t get into this with you right now.” I said while trying to avoid his face.
“I know what you are doing Hope. I won’t let you do this to us because you think it is the right thing for me. You are wrong. I know you love me. I know you want this. I know you want our future.” He pleaded.
I wanted to tell him he was right. Running into his arms would have been so much easier. I just couldn’t live with myself knowing that I kept him from something he thought was out of his reach. I had to let him want to try.
“Chance, please. You need to do this. Just accept the offer and see this through. Please.” I begged.
He grabbed me by the arm and forced me to look at him. His hands cupped my face. “There is no fucking way I am going to let you do this Hope.” He threatened.
“I don’t want what you want anymore.”I said in a low tone. It took everything I had to keep a straight face. I felt like I had just stabbed myself directly in the heart.
“Stop lying!” Chance said as he grabbed both of my arms. “Please don’t do this to me.” He eyes filled with tears and I watched the first ones drop down to his cheek. “You make me want to live again. I don’t want this life if you aren’t in it Hope.”
Just seeing my handsome boyfriend shedding tears because he feared he was losing me made me start sobbing. I put my hands over my face to hide the tears from him. “I just want you to be happy Chance. I want you to have what you always wanted.”
He pulled my hands down. My vision was blurred by the amount of liquid in each of my eyes, but I could see that he was looking directly at me. “Don’t you get it Hope? Don’t you understand? You are what I always wanted. I may not have known it then, but from the first moment I met you, I knew you were important. I know we are young, but there was never a doubt for me. I love you and I want to marry you, and have our own family.”
I shook my head. “School is important Chance. You can play ball again.”
“Dammit Hope! Yes, I was excited about the offer, but none of that is as important as us. I want you to do something. I want you to look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t feel the same way. If you can say that to me then I will believe you. I will accept Mark’s offer and throw myself into Virginia Tech. I need to hear you say it though.”
I took a deep breath and looked up at him. His eyes were red and I could tell he was frustrated. I didn’t know what to do. On one hand, I wanted to throw caution to the wind and tell him I didn’t want a future, but he could see right through me.
“I can’t Chance.” I looked down at the ground.
He put his hands around my face again. “Stop fighting me Hope. I will always choose you.” He said as he put his lips on top of mine. “I am already enrolled in the community college and have my schedule picked out. I am not throwing away anything that I need in my life. I promise you.”
We were standing on the side of the road, and our affectionate embrace was obvious to anyone that had been passing by. Realizing that my father could come driving down the road at any moment I backed away from Chance. “Maybe we should talk about this somewhere else.” I suggested.
“Do you trust me Hope?”
“With my life.”
“Stop trying to make my decisions. You aren’t some summer fling, or some young love. Besides, I haven’t played ball in such a long time. I don’t know if I could even get back into it the way I was before.” He ran his hands through his hair. “Do you want a ride back to the house?”
“No! I am just going to pretend I was out for a run. I will meet you back there.” I watched as he climbed back on his bike. “Wear a helmet next time.”
“Sorry, I saw my future running away and I didn’t have time for safety.” He gave me a wink and took off toward the house.
I ended up walking the whole way back, giving me time to reflect on what had just happened. I guess I was an idiot to think Chance would just walk away from our relationship. The cards were all on the table now too. Chance was very clear about his intentions with where our relationship was going. He was right about one thing. I wanted the same thing.
There was a part of me that wished he would have just said yes. The separation would be something that we dealt with already; surely, we could do it again. Maybe he was right about not being in the same place he was when he played ball last. I didn’t want his decision to be based on just me. I hated that he would do that. I hated that I even made a big deal about it now that it was all said and done.
Perhaps he would have said no after thinking about it. It bothered me, but not as much as the look on his eyes when I lied to him. I couldn’t do that again.
Chapter 45
Chance
After much consideration, I decided to go spend a day at Virginia Tech to check out the campus and the baseball organization. Since mine and Hopes falling out, she had been more positive about me at least seeing it through. I wanted her to come with me and Mark had pushed the idea just as much in an optimistic way of thinking Hope would fall in love with the campus and want to come too.
Our day had been set and we took Hope’s car knowing that Mark wouldn’t allow her on my bike, besides it was starting to get entirely too cold to be riding a motorcycle around anyway.
We left early in the morning and by the time; we had made it to campus we had stopped three times. Once was to get gas in Hope’s car. The next was because Hope had drank a large coffee and couldn’t hold her bladder. The third was because she said she was starving to death. I didn’t mind though, because anytime with her was a good time, besides the fact that I loved to tease her.
When we walked into the campus, I noticed that it was a bit overwhelming for Hope. The community college was nothing compared in size to this and Hope seemed genuinely afraid. While the sports coordinator showed me around, she tagged along behind us, taking more of a sister approach as opposed to my girlfriend. It was easier that way for both of us; we never knew who knew her father.
After we had toured what appeared to be the entire sports facility, we took a break for lunch. Hope and I grabbed some sandwiches from the cafeteria and found a shaded spot in the grass. The sun was shining and for some reason the temperature today was over sixty degrees. I pulled Hope between my legs after we were done eating, and while the breeze blew her hair around her face, we watched as the students congregated all around us.
“So what do you think?” I asked.
She shrugged. “So far it seem
s pretty cool. It is bigger than I guess I imagined it to be. How about you? Are you ready to move out here?”
“The facility is nice and it seems like they have a good program going here, but you know I am nervous about starting back up again. It has really been a long time Hope. I don’t know if I will be ready enough to play this coming spring.” I admitted.
I kissed the top of her forehead. She pulled my arms across her chest tighter. “So how far do you think the dorms are away from each other?” She asked.
I wondered if Hope was actually considering going to school here. I had explained to her about the strict curfews that I would have to abide by if I was on the team. Between practice and classes, our time together would be limited. I knew it was hard for her to take, because it was also hard for me. I didn’t like the little time we had now, and it would be cut into half. Sure, we could be together more freely, but by then she would be eighteen and it really wouldn’t matter too much. We planned on telling Mark about our relationship once the wedding was over with.
“We need to go meet that guy about it now actually.” I lifted Hope up easily to a standing position and stood up behind her. Since the sports director was gone, I could hold her hand without her worrying who would see. When I grabbed it, she looked up at me and smiled.
The next hour or so was a bunch of walking around. The dorms were situated all around campus and honestly, there was no way to tell where you would be. Hope seemed uneasy as we toured each room. They were small, and although she was used to a small room at her mothers, she now had a huge room that she didn’t have to share with anyone else.
When the guy giving us the tour talked about roommates, I thought Hope was going to pass out. I squeezed her hand to let her know I hated it too.
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