I sigh, frustrated. “Skyler,” I say, but she doesn’t look up. I lift her chin up once more and make her look at me. “I want you. If what you said is true just now, then you want me, too. I don’t care about Erin, I don’t care about your sorority or my fraternity – not right now. Right now, I care about the fact that you’re here, with me, in my shower, and I want you.” I let my other hand slide down over her arm to her waist and finally down just above her hip line. “Now, tell me you don’t want me. Tell me you want me to stop.” I push my hand a little lower, my fingers just barely touching her clit. She pulls in a sharp breath, her eyes fluttering. “Tell me to let you go.”
Her breaths are heavy, the steam in my bathroom swirling around us as I wait for her to answer. Impatient, I let my fingers drop a little lower, biting my lip when I feel how wet she is.
“Tell me to stop, Skyler.”
She’s shaking now, but she still stares at me with her baby blues, unwavering. Finally, she speaks softly, almost a whisper.
“I can’t.”
I shake my head. “You have to tell me to stop, Skyler, or I won’t be able to. Once I feel you, once I taste you, I won’t be able to stop then. If you don’t want this, you have to tell me now.”
Skyler lets out a long, shaky breath, trying to steady her voice. “I want this,” she says as her eyes fall to my lips. “I want you.”
Her hands fly into my hair and she pulls me to her, crushing her mouth on mine. In a matter of seconds we’re a tangle of arms, legs, and lips, frantically grabbing at each other, eliminating any remaining space between us. I push her against the wall of the shower, stepping in with her as I pin her wrists above her head with one hand and use my other to slide two fingers inside her in one quick movement. She gasps and lets out a loud cry, making my dick harden even more beneath my board shorts.
I work my fingers inside her, biting down her neck and across her collar bone. She’s so wet that my fingers glide in and out with fluid ease. I want to bury my cock inside her, but she’s not ready for that – not yet. She’s opening herself up to me right now, and I don’t want to push her away.
I move my mouth to her nipple and tug it between my teeth as she arches toward me, thrusting her hips into my hand. My palm works against her clit as my fingers dive in and out. Her moans grow louder, my name escaping between the part in her lips every few breaths. Each time she says it my dick grows harder.
Suddenly, she rips her wrists free and grabs my shorts, untying them swiftly and tugging them over my hips. They fall to the floor of the shower and I kick them to the side, my fingers still inside her as she grabs my cock in her hand.
“Oh fuck,” I groan as she moves her hand over me, slowly at first and then she starts pumping, bringing me close to the edge. I thrust into her hand and dig my fingers deeper, finding her mouth and pulling her bottom lip between my teeth.
I rub my palm against her harder, friction building as my fingers glide in and out. Her breaths get shorter and shorter until she’s holding them altogether and I know she’s close. She tries to keep her hand working on me, but her grip is loosening, her focus drifting.
“This is about you,” I growl against her neck before biting it again. “I want you to come. Come on my fingers so I can taste you.”
“Oh God.” She lets out a loud moan, dropping her hands to grip the wall behind her. Her legs are shaking, so I pull her up into my arms and carry her out of the bathroom to the bed. I lay her down and quickly kiss down her stomach to her clit, circling it with my tongue while my fingers move. She shakes a few moments more, her moans increasing in volume before she stiffens and I feel her release, her pussy throbbing around my fingers as her screams ring out.
I don’t stop moving my hand or my tongue until she falls limp, her legs opening wide against the mattress. Slowly, I remove my fingers, kissing her all the way back to her lips before sucking her sweetness off my fingertips. Her eyes roll back and I kiss her soft and slow, our breaths coming down as she tastes herself on my tongue. My dick is throbbing, begging me for relief, but I focus on Skyler. I can handle myself later.
She doesn’t say anything as I grab a towel and her clothes from the bathroom. I pull her up from the bed and dry her off, still holding most of her weight against me as her legs tremble. She pulls on the boxers and I slide the shirt over her head before pulling her down onto the bed with me. Wrapping her in the covers, I pull her back to my chest and nuzzle into her still wet hair.
Within seconds, she’s asleep.
I wake to the sound of loud laughter on the TV. I reach for the remote to turn it off when I realize Skyler’s no longer in bed with me. My clothes are folded and laying where she once was, but there’s no sign of her anywhere. I check my phone, no missed text or call. No note on the nightstand.
Shit.
Sighing, I check the time before sending her a quick text. It’s just after seven.
- Ella Mae, how could you leave your fiancé without even a kiss goodbye? -
After ten minutes with no response, I throw the covers back in frustration and sit up. There’s a poker tournament tonight at a casino in Miami and I need to go. I haven’t practiced once since I’ve been here, and even if I do figure out Skyler’s weaknesses and power moves, it won’t matter if I’m not up on my own game.
The fact that I just thought about Skyler and poker makes me sick. How can I possibly still have my head in this fucking game of my father’s after what just happened between us? For a brief moment, I try to imagine what would happen if I just told him I wanted out – if I stayed at Palm South and had Skyler, truly had her. If she was mine.
But I know it can’t happen that way.
I shower quickly, my body reluctant to wash away the memory of Skyler’s hands and mouth. Between getting out of the shower and getting completely dressed, I check my phone a total of seven times with no response from her.
Fuck. I told myself not to push her, not to make this something it didn’t have to be, but damn if I had a choice when she was standing naked in my shower, her body glistening, her face hot with want. I should have stopped myself but I didn’t.
But she didn’t stop me either.
I call a cab and grab my keys, turning out the lights. I’m not in the right mindset for this tournament, but I don’t have a choice. As I lock the door behind me and start walking down the stairs, my phone pings in my pocket.
But it’s not Skyler.
It’s Adam.
- All pledges report to the house. You have twenty minutes. -
“I hate Valentine’s Day,” my Little says, swinging her legs in the air behind her as we lie stomach-down on my bed. We’ve been watching romantic comedies on Oxygen all day, taking solace in the relaxation we’ve somehow managed to find time for. My one Monday class was cancelled and she joined me after her two morning classes, bottles of wine stuffed in her backpack. We’re not technically supposed to drink in the sorority house, but that’s why they make bedazzled thermoses, right?
“I mean seriously, whose bright idea was it to make a day to single out the already miserably single?”
I roll my eyes. “Oh, stop. Last year, Valentine’s Day was the best day ever to you.”
“Yeah, well,” she says, sitting up and grabbing our half-eaten bowl of popcorn. “That was because I had not one, but two guys fighting for my attention. How is it that Valentine’s Day is in four days and I don’t have a single option?”
“Could it have anything to do with the fact that your major is insanely difficult and you have to study anytime you’re not at a sorority event? I mean really Little, when is the last time you went out? To a frat party? To a bar? Anywhere other than the library?”
She opens her mouth to defend herself, pauses, and tosses a popcorn puff in instead. “Shit,” she muses after a minute. “You’re right.”
“I love when you say that.”
Cassie scowls, tossing a puff at me. “Okay, smarty pants, so what do I do? Valentine’s Day is in
four days and I don’t have a date.”
“OH MY FUCKING GOD I’M GOING TO KILL SOMEONE!” Jess barges through the door, throwing her hoodie across the room onto her bed and slinging her purse against the wall. Her hair is mussed up, her cheeks pink – I can’t tell if she looks really pissed off or like she just had a quickie in the hallway.
“What the hell?” Cassie hugs tighter to her bowl of popcorn, as if it’s her child and might be the next victim of Jess’s rage.
Jess paces around the room, her hands twisting in her hair. “Greg. Fucking Greg.”
“What did he do?”
“It’s what he didn’t do,” Jess says, plopping onto her bed and letting herself fall back against the half exposed sheets. Cassie and I exchange confused glances and I shrug.
“Uh, care to divulge, J-Love?” I ask hesitantly, muting the TV.
“I’ve got a really bad case of the Blue Bean, ladies. A major Violet Vulva.”
More blank stares.
Jess leans up a little to peek at us over her boobs. Seeing our lack of response, she sits up and lets out an exaggerated huff. “Blue balls! I have blue balls. Like, fucking bruised, swollen, black and blue balls.”
I chance a glance at my Little and see her tuck her lip between her teeth, fighting back laughter. Trying to do the same, I press my lips together and nod. “Would you like me to rub them for you?”
At that, Cassie loses it and I follow suit, both of us laughing so hard tears spring to our eyes. Jess tosses two pillows and a stuffed shark at us in succession, clocking me on the head with one as Cassie catches the other two.
“Witches!”
I fight to speak through the laughter. “Sorry.” I clear my throat. “Sorry, Jess. Tell us what happened.”
“No, fuck you,” she says, pulling the covers of her bed down and wincing as she crawls under.
“Wait,” Cassie says, setting down the bowl of popcorn. “Does it really hurt?”
“Yes, fuckhead, it really hurts. I’m so worked up I’m pretty sure putting on sweat pants is going to make me orgasm.”
“Well shit, let me at least put on Magic Mike or something,” I say, flipping through the channels. Her last pillow flies across the room and hits the wall by my head.
“I hate you,” she says, but now she’s laughing, too. “What am I going to do? Like seriously, I’m going to kill him. Murder him. Hang him from the Omega Chi Beta roof. ”
“What happened? I don’t understand,” my Little asks.
Jess sighs, sitting up straight. “We were studying in his room, and you know how they’re on probation, right? Well, apparently there’s no visitors after eleven now. So, around ten, he starts fooling around with me. At first I’m not about it because, seriously, only an hour? But he’s persistent and fucking hot as hell so, of course, I give in. So we’re going at it, his hand is working all kinds of magic on me and he’s hard as a fucking rock. We’re just about to take it all the way when in walks Ryan, his fucking roommate.”
“Oh shit,” Cassie says and we both laugh again. I can’t help but flash back to last Sunday with Kip, how his hand was working magic on me. Magic isn’t even the right word – it doesn’t do justice to what he did to me. The way he spoke to me, the way his entire body touched and moved me, not just his hand. He put a spell on me. It wasn’t magic, it was witchcraft.
And I loved every single second of it.
“Well couldn’t he have just told Ryan to take a hike?”
“My point exactly!” Jess says, her hands flying into the air. “That’s what I figured he would do, right? So there I am, skirt up around my hips under his comforter waiting for him to say something. You know what he does? He pulls his pants up and asks Ryan if he’s eaten yet or if he wants to split a frozen pizza.”
“No he didn’t,” I say, my mouth open.
“I can’t make this shit up.” She slides down between the sheets. “So then I’m still sitting there waiting until finally it’s like five minutes ‘til eleven and I have to go. It was so embarrassing, pulling down my damn skirt and letting myself out of his room and the fucking house. And all the while him and Ryan are just buddying it up, talking about the Intramural football game and shit. Ugh!” She punches her pillow just as Ashlei and Erin walk in. “My pussy is so swollen right now I’m pretty sure it’s hanging out the side of my thong.”
“Ew! What the fuck, J-Love?” Erin asks, clearly disturbed. Cassie and I lose our shit, laughing so hard it hurts our sides. Jess joins in and before long we’re completely breathless, trying to stop but failing to every time.
“Apparently we missed something,” Ashlei says, brows quirked.
I shake my head. “You don’t even want to know, Lei.”
Erin sits down in Jess’s desk chair as Ashlei climbs into bed with Jess, stroking her hair as she leans on Ashlei’s shoulder.
“Has Kip asked you to the dance yet?”
Jesus, she couldn’t talk to me about this in private? All the girls stare at me, waiting.
“Uh, no…”
“What about your date last Sunday? He didn’t ask then?”
“That wasn’t a date. I taught him how to paddleboard, that’s all. And no, he didn’t ask. And I haven’t talked to him since.”
“Why not?”
My Little eyes me, apparently picking up on my discomfort. She offers a small smile and I sigh, staring down at my fingernails and picking at the peeling polish. “I don’t know. I may or may not have left his place without saying anything. And then he texted me and I didn’t answer. And then he didn’t show up for class Thursday, so I tried texting him and acting like everything was cool, but he didn’t answer me. I think he’s pissed. I don’t blame him.”
Erin yells, “What the hell?” just as Ashlei asks, “When was this?”
I lift my eyes to meet Erin’s, her chocolate pools scrutinizing me. She thinks I failed. And she might be right. But I couldn’t stay there with him. I let it go too far. The longer he held me, the more comfortable I got in bed with him, the more I realized how fucked I am. I’m supposed to toy with his head, but I can’t stand back far enough to not get hurt. It’s like he’s a hot stove and no matter how many times I burn my hand, I can’t stop the temptation to touch him. So I left. I thought it was the right move, but clearly, I was wrong.
“Last Sunday is when I saw him. I texted him Thursday after class,” I say, turning to Jess.
“Aren’t the A Sigs on their retreat thingy? You know, how they disappear every spring semester with the new pledges?”
I pinch my brows together, chewing on her words. “Holy crap, I didn’t even think of that.” Every year, the A Sigs disappear with their new spring pledges for a little over a week. No one knows where they go – whether it’s the woods, the beach, or just the basement under their house – but almost every brother goes along with every single pledge. They always resurface at the New Member Bonfire as initiated brothers and no one speaks a word about the time they were gone. I’ve always thought it was so bad ass, to have an initiation that secret and that coveted.
“I haven’t seen Adam since last weekend now that I think about it,” my Little says and I nod. Wait, why does my little know what Adam is doing? I give her a questioning look but she avoids my eyes, staring at Erin instead.
“See? I bet he’s not mad at you. He probably disappeared not too long after you left that day.”
I sigh. “Maybe. Ex, I don’t know about this anymore. I feel like he’s going to get too caught up… I’m really starting to learn a lot about him and he’s asking a lot about me. It’s getting serious – and fast.”
“Good,” she says, standing. “That’s exactly what we want, isn’t it? The faster and harder he falls, the more devastated he will be and the more he’ll want what we had back. What we had was simple, true, uncomplicated. After the mess you leave him in, he’ll be begging for that back.”
I wince at her words and my Little grabs my hand under the covers, giving me a reassuring s
queeze. Even Jess and Ashlei seem to sense my true feelings and I feel the weight of everyone’s stares hot on my skin.
“Okay,” is all I say, all I can manage to get out.
Erin nods, though her expression softens a little when she studies me closer. She moves to pull me into a quick hug. “I love you, Little Sky. I know this isn’t fun for you, but it’s almost over – and you’re one step closer to following in our KKB family line’s footsteps. When I graduate in December, you’re going to be the next one in that presidential room down the hall. Just remember that.” She smiles before turning and walking out the door, leaving me alone with the Jess, Ashlei, and my Little, all their eyes still trained on me.
“Sky…” Ashlei says, a tone of sympathy in her voice.
“Lei, just don’t.” I wave my hand and lie down, pulling the covers over my face. My Little rips them back down.
“You’re falling for him, aren’t you?”
“Sky, you can’t. You have to disconnect,” Jess adds.
“I know that, okay?! I know. It’s not that easy. There’s more to him than what meets the eye. He’s interested in me, he cares about my dreams and my passion for poker. He makes me feel free, like I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not.”
“We don’t make you feel like you have to pretend, do we?” Ashlei asks, seeming a little hurt.
I sigh. “No, but you know what I mean. He doesn’t care if I’m wearing pearls and a Lily Pulitzer dress or if I’m in a baggy pair of sweat pants with my hair tied up. And he calls me out on my bullshit. I don’t know, I tell myself every single time I’m with him and every minute I’m not that I can’t have him, that I have to take a step back, but it all goes to hell when he smiles. His smile is fucking poison, I swear.”
The girls are quiet for a second, digesting. Finally, Ashlei says, “Well, just try harder. This is already going to be hard for him when it all comes crashing down, I don’t want to see you get caught under the rubble, too.”
I swallow hard, knowing it’s too late for that already, but I just nod. “I know, I will.”
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