by Liliana Hart
The fighting around me escalated and it was brutal. My magic roared through my body and I quickly scanned the room for Bo and his buddies. They had shifted and were cornered by three honey badgers with death on their agenda. Not today.
I popped the bastards and encased the kids in an impenetrable bubble. It would be a pull on my power, but it was the best I could do. Those fuckers weren’t going to kill children. Holy hell they were ugly—rubbery skin and frighteningly large teeth.
“Stay with your back against the wall,” Mac’s voice bellowed in my head. “You’ll be able to see what’s coming at you.”
I scanned the crowd for him and spotted him in a showdown with eight badgers. He was vicious and magnificent. I quickly followed his advice.
Blondie pointed me out to a particularly big, ugly badger. I was certain he was their leader and he was gunning for me.
“That’s her. That’s the witch,” she screamed as her face contorted into something ugly and scary. “Kill her. She dies like her aunt.”
She had something to do with my aunt’s death? Why?
I was concerned about the badger, but first things first.
“Beauty is as beauty does.
The Goddess shall judge us all.
But those who thrive on blood and death,
Shall be the first to take the fall.”
Blondie morphed into a hideous creature with fangs and warts before she exploded and disappeared in a cloud of black smoke. It halted the badger only briefly. His eyes widened in horror and the roar that left his slimy mouth made my eyes cross.
And then everything slowed. The badger had magic and he was using it. It was uncomfortably familiar. It was witch magic. How in the hell did he possess witch magic? And then I saw it. It was something I would never be able to erase—not even with a lifetime of therapy. Not even with magic. It would be my nightmare for eternity. The scene played through my head like a horror movie and it was all I could do not to throw up. The badger was proud. He wanted to show me his kill—my aunt’s death, before he added me to his list.
It was in Hildy’s kitchen where it started. Blondie and several badgers cornered her. She tried to bargain for her life, but they laughed. I watched in horror as she tried to pull up her magic and they doused her in a blue solution that rendered her impotent. After a beating that left her bloody and weak, they threw her to the floor. Two badgers held her down as Blondie stuck a huge glowing syringe in her heart.
My aunt’s weeping constricted my own heart and it was difficult to breathe. They had found a tool to drain her magic from her body and they did it with sadistic pleasure. Hildy’s beautiful body writhed in pain and she chanted to the Goddess for mercy—for death, but it fell on deaf ears. The bile rose in my throat as the badger projected the gruesome scene. His beady eyes smiled at me and his teeth gnashed.
After Blondie injected my aunt’s magic into the badger, they tore her apart and ate her. Sickened didn’t even begin to describe what I felt. They were barbarians and they would die by my hand. Blondie’s death had been too kind, but that was not a mistake I would make twice.
With a quick glance around the room, I spotted Chuck and Mac tearing the heads from the attacking honey badgers. Simon, Kurt, Wanda, Bob, Roger and DeeDee weren’t faring as well, but they were alive. Some of the others weren’t. The pretty skunk girl Simon had been dancing with lay dead in a bloody heap on the floor.
Thankfully the children were still safe in the bubble, but honey badgers clawed at it violently. I wasn’t at full power while the bubble held, but my fury displaced my slightly lessened magical capacity. It was time for some badgers to die.
Reaching down deep into myself, I prayed to the Goddess for guidance. We were supposed to be healers and stewards of the earth. I wasn’t bloodthirsty or violent—until now. In a very short period of time I’d become attached to people and watching them die was simply not an option. I could stop this. I could end this. I could choose to believe in myself. And I would.
“Zelda, on your left,” Mac shouted as he bound across the room to me.
An acid-like burst of pain shot through my leg as a badger bit down and locked on. How did I miss him? I fought to throw him off, but he was too strong. Panicked, I pulled for magic, but holding the bubble surrounding Bo and his friends was more of a drain than I thought. Fuck. Me or the kids? No choice. I would not let children die on my watch.
Mac’s eyes were wild and his roar made the hair on my neck stand up as he tore the badger on my leg to shreds. I watched in horrific satisfaction. He was vicious and beautiful. For the first time in my life someone besides Winnie had my back. For real had my back.
He licked my leg and the wound began to mend together.
“Are you trying to become the new Shifter Wanker?” I laughed. It was either laugh or cry and I was not a baby. I looked down in wonder as my leg healed completely.
“I am keeping my mate alive, so she can do her job and still have sex by the river later,” his wolf said with great satisfaction.
I giggled and rolled my eyes. “Shall we?” I asked and indicated the shit show around us.
He nodded and rubbed his huge body against mine. “Yes. Let’s.”
Together we moved to the center of the room. The sounds of battle made me ill. It had to stop.
Fire in every color of the rainbow engulfed my upper body and I struggled to remain standing. Mac pressed his body to mine and I used his head for balance. Flames hissed and snapped as sparkles leapt around my head and rained over me and my wolf. My hair blew wildly and my breath came in short gasps. I’d never conjured up this much power in my life and I hoped to hell that I didn’t blow the entire building up. I narrowed my eyes and focused my thoughts. I vaguely heard gasps and shrieks as a funnel of wind erupted from the floor and gathered every honey badger in the room except one. That badger would die slowly—very slowly. The ugly fucker hung helplessly in the air, trapped by magic as he watched his colony swirl inside the violent mini tornado.
I closed my eyes and chanted as the badgers popped one by one. It was hateful, but I did it that way so they knew what was coming as they watched their own die before them. The leader roared and tried to undo my spell with the magic he’d torn from my aunt’s body, but I was stronger. I was more insane, unbalanced and psychotic than he was, but I cared. I cared for all the shifters in the room. The ones I knew the names of and the ones I didn’t. I cared for my aunt—the woman who looked just like me and didn’t deserve to die. And I cared for the wolf who wanted me to be his. This was all ridiculous and futile as I still planned to leave, but I couldn’t decipher it at the moment. I needed to protect the ones who needed me and destroy the ones who wanted me dead.
It sounded like popcorn and it was over quickly. They were dead. The badgers could no longer hurt my people. I let the bubble around the children dissolve and they ran quickly to their parents. I didn’t know how many were dead and how many lived, but I had business to attend to and I would heal the wounded after.
“I will kill him,” Mac’s voice hissed in my head as he approached the floating badger.
“No,” I shouted. “He’s mine.”
Mac turned and stared as he shifted back to human form. Then he slowly stepped aside. The shocked murmurs that erupted through the crowd made me realize this was a monumental moment. The king was sharing his power—with me.
“As you wish,” he said.
My heart thundered in my chest. I wouldn’t have this moment if not for him. I’d be lying dead in the corner torn apart by badgers just like my aunt had been. He had saved me and made it possible for me to avenge Hildy. To process my feelings was impossible. I wasn’t good at it and this really wasn’t the right time. Later. I’d deal with it later. I had work to do.
“She didn’t deserve to die by your hand,” I ground out as I approached the badger who wasn’t quite as confident as he had been only minutes ago. “You took her magic and now I will take it back.”
I felt Mac
at my shoulder as I closed the gap between myself and the horrid animal that had senselessly killed my aunt. Mac’s presence calmed me and he didn’t try to stop me. He was going to let me fight my own battle. My hair still tossed wildly around my head and I knew my skin glowed eerily. I felt beautiful and powerful and loved by the people surrounding me. It was an unfamiliar feeling, but it felt good.
“She died like a coward,” the badger spat. “She begged for her life.” He laughed maniacally and drool fell from his lips. Mac’s body tensed next to me and I knew it took all he had not to destroy the evil piece of shit.
“Death will be too good for you, so I think I’ll leave you to my Council,” I informed him calmly as his eyes grew wide with terror. Mac’s body relaxed beside me and an impressed chuckle from deep in his gut left his lips. The Witch Council was famous for torture of enemies. I wasn’t clear what they did and I was quite happy to leave it that way. However, the honey badger had clearly heard about their methods. “But before I turn you over I need something back.”
I punched my fist into his chest. The squishy sound was sickening, but it was the fastest and most efficient to retrieve what belonged to my family. Aunt Hildy’s magic came to my blood and guts covered hand quickly and with joy. It slid up my arm and flowed into my chest. It was warm and strong. It nestled and shuddered. I could feel my aunt inside me and my eyes filled with tears.
The badger was now unconscious, but he was still alive. He hung in the air, which was where he would stay until I could call the Council to get him. We would need to discover where that syringe was and how he came to have it.
“Oh no,” Wanda cried out and my heart lodged in my throat. I turned and gasped. My voice sounded strange to my ears. She held a limp Fabio in her hands and was trying to stop the flow of blood that came from his head.
“No, no, no,” I screamed and I ran to her as I gently took my mangy, ball-licking cat from her shaking arms. “You will not die, you little shit. You have at least three more lives left.” Salty tears rolled down my cheeks and to my lips as he lay still and lifeless in my arms.
I quickly pulled up all the healing magic I owned and let it wash over him but I was too late. Too fucking late.
Mac eased me to the floor as I sobbed. I cradled Fabio to my chest and whispered to him. “I am so sorry,” I blubbered in barely coherent English. “You drove me nuts and I did consider the pound a couple of times, but I never would have really done it. And you were right. If I had balls and I could lick them, I would have—probably more than you did. You stupid cat. You made me love you and now you’re dead. This is why I don’t love people or animals or anything. They don’t stay. Who’s going to steal me clothes from Paris now? Who’s going to make me pancakes? Oh Goddess, I wish I had told you when you asked. I do, you little fucker. I love you.”
My sobs racked my body and I rocked my dead cat back and forth until his weight gain made rocking impossible. WTF? I was no longer holding my sweet yet inappropriate little cat. Nope, I was holding a huge, auburn-haired naked man with eyes that matched mine.
That’s when I screamed.
Chapter Fourteen
“Oh my Goddess, cover him up,” I yelled as I shoved the huge shocked man off of my lap and slapped my hands over my eyes. He was beautiful, but for some reason his naked body repelled me. I was completely grossed out. “Somebody cover his balls. Now! I cannot look at this man’s nuts or weenie or I will puke.”
I stared up at the ceiling as my friends and neighbors frantically searched for something to cover the offending privates. Finally Mac draped an orange tablecloth over the man who used to be my cat. The guy looked hideous in orange with his red hair, but that was the least of my problems at the moment.
“Who the fuck are you and what did you do with my dead cat, buster?” I demanded as I got in his face.
His smile made me blink. It was a mirror of mine. Who in the hell was he?
“Hello, Zelda. I’ve waited a long time to make your acquaintance.”
I was bizarrely drawn to him, so I backed away. My urge was to hug him, but he made my dead cat disappear. “I want my cat back,” I snapped.
He smiled and held out his hand. I refused it and he slowly dropped it back to his side.
“Tell her who you are,” Mac demanded.
“You know him?” I asked. Confusion didn’t begin to cover the thoughts filling my brain.
Mac squatted down next to me and wrapped his arms around me. “I’ve met him several times,” he said to me. “I figured it was you,” he said to Naked Dude.
“She could do better,” Naked Dude said with authority.
Why did this sound familiar?
“Are you Fabio?” I asked.
“Yes,” he replied, his focus totally on me. “But I’m more.”
“Yeah, clearly. You’re a big naked man who I do not ever want to see naked again.”
The crowd of shifters watched. Some frowned in confusion and some smiled knowingly. Goddess, I hated not being in on the secret. This sucked and needed to end now.
“You realize you can’t lick your balls anymore,” I told him and then dropped my head into my hands. Why was I born without a filter? Why?
The shifters laughed and the man chuckled. “I will actually miss that,” he said. I looked up and grinned.
“Who are you?” I asked again.
“Zelda, I am your father.”
I was unsure if I wanted to laugh, cry or smack him. This was a shitty joke and it tore at my heart, cracking it to pieces.
“What the fuck?” I shouted. “When did we start playing Star Wars? I don’t have a father. I have a sperm donor. You are not my father. I want my cat back.”
“Zelda, I can explain.” The man’s voice was raw and full of emotion. I looked to Mac.
“Is he telling the truth?” I whispered as I leaned into him for comfort.
“He is, but if you don’t want to talk to him I will take you away.”
Turning back, I stared at the man who claimed to be my sperm donor. At least now it made sense why I couldn’t look at him naked…
“Spill it.” I crossed my arms over my chest and waited. The impulse to crawl over to him was enormous.
“I didn’t know about you. Your mother never told me. When I found out I confronted her and she turned me into a cat. The only way I could be with you as your father was if I earned your love.” His voice was sincere and his eyes searched mine, begging for something.
I groaned and let my head fall back on my shoulders. “It took me a very long time to love you as a cat. I have no clue if I can love you as a father. Is your name really Fabio?”
“Yes. Yes, it is.”
“That’s kind of unfortunate,” I muttered.
“Yes, well, my sister’s name was Hildegard.”
He did have a point. I was glad he had no hand in naming me.
“All right, Fab—dadio,” I stuttered and then expelled a large sigh. “We can go slow. Really slow. You will have to wear clothes that aren’t orange and I won’t call you Dad until I can say it without laughing—which may be never. I will call you Fabio or Naked Dude. You will pay for therapy until I can get the visual of your white ass out of my head and you have to tell me about Aunt Hildy.”
“I can do that,” he said. His eyes sparkled with hope and I felt wanted by a parent for the first time in my life. It was a heady feeling and I didn’t want to trust it, but he was here and he was smiling at me.
The magic in the ransacked bar ramped up dramatically. The shifters huddled in fear, but I just smiled. I knew she would show up eventually. It was All Hallows Eve, after all.
“Well, this is certainly a mess,” Baba Yaga purred as she and her scary cronies appeared in a poof of old lady crouch smoke.
“Yep,” I agreed as I hugged her tight. She had graduated from Flashdance attire to appalling Madonna-esque. Hundreds of black rubber bracelets covered her arms and the cone-shaped bustier that barely contained her ample breasts could
put an eye out. Her skintight silver lamé pants made me gag, but I was truly happy to see her. “I have a present for you.”
“Really?” she asked as she took in my naked pappy with interest. “Fabio darling, I didn’t think you’d be able to do it. You made her love you! Congratulations,” she said happily as she flicked her pinkie and dressed him in a heinous outfit from the eighties. My dad/cat cringed as he glanced down at his ensemble...at least it wasn’t orange. I hoped someone’s cell phone had made it through the battle. I needed a blackmail picture of this. “What sort of present do you have for me, dear?”
“I have the motherfucking assmonger who murdered Aunt Hildy. He used a syringe to drain her magic before he killed her and then he put it in himself.”
“Do you eat with that mouth?” she inquired dryly.
I glanced over at Mac and exchanged grins. “Yes, I do.”
“And did you take her magic back?” Baba asked as she examined the vile badger with hatred.
“I did.”
“Good girl. I’d suggest you be careful with it. You now possess enough power to blow up the continental U.S.” She clapped her hands with delight and I blanched. That was far more responsibility than someone like me should have. Ever.
The warlocks surrounded the hanging badger and yanked him from the air. The looks of sadistic satisfaction on their faces made my stomach roil, but the honey badger had it coming. He had a way to kill witches and take their gifts. This was very bad and tremendously deadly to my kind.
“So your next mission, if you choose to take it, will be to find the syringe, kill all the ones who created it and destroy any evidence that is left,” she said with her back to me. “Alone.” She turned around, readjusted her dangerous knockers and continued. “Or you could take up your aunt’s job.”
