“Mack, please. I can’t take it.”
He didn’t answer, just sucked her clit harder into his mouth, purposefully grazing his teeth over her sensitive node. She bucked, gave a whimper, and her entire body stiffened in his hands. Mack lapped up her orgasm with the enthusiasm of a man dying of thirst presented with a drop of water. Afraid he was going to come in his pants, he needed inside her now, needed to feel her tight wall squeezing him. He got to his feet, ripped off his shirt, and shoved his pants to the ground. Within seconds, he was standing before her naked. Marley was panting, like he had just given her a goddamn good orgasm. She had no idea what was coming. He was going to take her to the next level and beyond.
Mack eased her onto the scant cushion provided by their clothes. He nudged her knees apart, staring down at her slick folds and all her beauty.
“Mack, please,” she said, reaching for him.
“I’m not stopping, baby. Not even close.” As if he could stop before he buried himself hilt-deep inside her core. Mack lowered down onto his elbows, lining up his cock with her entrance, and then braced himself and nudged inside. God, she was tight. He didn’t have the willpower to go slow and make it last. Not right now. “You sure?”
Marley planted her feet on the floor and shoved up. “Yes!”
Just a tiny inch deeper in, Mack’s hips jerked. He gave in, burying himself fully in her tight, hot sheath. Christ. She squeezed him like a damn vice, milking the blood from his brain. This was heaven—this was addiction. Torture. Raw pure need. He couldn’t hold still or go slow any more than he could stop that setting sun from falling beneath the tree line. Mack pulled out and plunged in, hard and deep, taking her with every ounce of control and desire that was rocketing around inside him, nearly out of control.
Marley met him thrust for thrust, keening, moaning, and calling out his name, her nails clawed into his back with a savage strength that made it even harder not to lose it. Bracing one hand over her shoulder, palm down, he used the other to cup her backside and lift her to him, protecting her back from the rough edge of the hard cave floor beneath them as he lifted her and pounded into her. Harder. Deeper. Every single thrust making his balls draw up a little bit more until he was so close to an orgasm he couldn’t think straight.
Marley cried out, her orgasm milking the last ounce of control from him as he joined her, releasing himself inside her with his own loud groan of pleasure. He collapsed onto his back. She joined him so that she was draped over his chest. They were both breathing hard. And Mack was reeling from the most intense joining he’d ever experienced. Instead of taking her and getting her the hell out of his system, it was like he had injected heroin straight into his veins and desperately needed more.
Chapter 13
Marley woke to see Mack standing at the mouth of the cave, his hands clasped behind his back. His bare shoulders shifted and she was drawn to the firm muscles highlighted by the play of shadows in the moonlight.
There was nothing soft about him. Despite the fact there was some gray in his hair, he kept himself in better shape than men half his age. Her stomach flipped over as she stared at him, remembering the feel of him between her thighs. Remembering his mouth on her body. There was nothing rash or selfish about him as a lover. He’d given her an orgasm first—twice. He’d made sure she was taken care of, just like he’d been doing since the plane crash.
Marley slowly got to her feet, savoring every single bit of tenderness in her body, knowing it had nothing to do with the crash and everything to do with the powerful man standing before her. She slipped on his T-shirt and padded up behind him.
He slid an arm around her waist and pulled her to his side. His chiseled features had desire pulsing through her veins. Though she could tell he was trying to appear relaxed, his worry was obvious in his strong jaw line. Unable to help herself, Marley traced his deepening five o’clock shadow. “You’re concerned about your men.”
It wasn’t a question. He knew it; she knew it.
Mack’s answer was to pull her closer as he scanned the dark horizon. “They can take care of themselves.”
Of course they could take care of themselves. She’d watched them move together in synchronicity—both on the plane and in action. If she were ever in a gunfight again, which she sincerely hoped she never was, she’d want to be with this team. “It doesn’t mean you can’t worry about them. I know my daughter’s home safe with my father and mother. I know they’ll take care of her, but I still worry.”
Mack’s gaze finally drifted from the forest down to her and Marley drew in a breath at the open sincerity in his gray eyes. “Why isn’t her father watching her?” His question shouldn’t have surprised her, but it still knocked some of the air from her lungs. She hadn’t really talked about her loss with anyone except Maddie and her parents. Was it right for her to have this conversation with the first man she’d had sex with since his death? Marley searched his gaze, but all she saw was curiosity and maybe a little concern. She relaxed. Maybe it was time for her to talk to someone about it, and something inside her wanted it to be Mack Grey.
“Her father died six years ago. He was a Marine. There was a roadside bomb.” A dull pain washed over her, not as sharp as it used to be but still edged enough to wound. It hadn’t been fair or right for John to be taken from them so suddenly, and Maddie had been so young. Just like her father and mother had told her, it had gotten easier with time—easier but not easy.
Mack squeezed her waist and Marley leaned her head into his chest, grateful that he hadn’t said something stupid or fake like ‘I can’t imagine’ or ‘At least he died for his country.’ There’d been so many of those comments in the past, people trying to say the right words and do the right things. Most of her friends had been her age, John’s age, and none of them had ever lost someone so young. Their natural tendency had been to pull away, unsure of how to feel or what to say around her. It hadn’t helped that all their friends were couple friends—with John gone, Marley no longer fit into the group dynamic. So, she’d gone home, embracing motherhood with everything she had, and dedicating the rest of herself to her job.
“It must’ve been tough on you losing him so young. How old was your daughter?”
“She was two. He was gone most of the time leading up to that mission, so she didn’t really know him. But he loved her and he loved me, and he did the best he could.”
Mack gave an understanding nod. “He sounds like a good man.”
Somehow it didn’t feel awkward being nearly naked in Mack’s arms while he talked about her deceased husband. It felt . . . right and natural. “He was there when she was born. For most of the first year he didn’t really know what to do with a baby girl.” Marley suspected most men felt the same way around infants, but John had always helped her when he could. “He got up with me when I had those late-night feedings and diaper changes, he lulled her to sleep when I was exhausted, and then he’d take us both to bed.” The memory was hazy but still there. The more Marley tried to think about John’s face and features, the harder it became to recall the details. One thing she hoped she would never forget was his smile and the absolute love in his eyes when he stared down at their daughter.
“I had a wife and a son.” Mack stared out over the horizon, shadows forming under his eyes. Pain hit her chest again. “Had?” Had he lost his family, too? His son?
“I was gone on deployments for most of our marriage. Barbara always said she understood and supported me a hundred percent. But . . .” He shrugged. “I should’ve never gotten married in this line of work.”
“Did she leave you because you were gone so much?”
The smile lines around his eyes deepened and his finger touched her arm.
“I came home from a deployment. I had talked to her the week before to let her know I was coming home. She acted like everything was fine. Cooper was fifteen at the time. My son. I barely got to talk to him anymore, but I always figured it was a simple case of teenage hormones. T
hat he probably preferred to go out with his friends than stay at home waiting to talk to a father he never saw.” Mack’s throat worked as he swallowed.
“I knew something was wrong right when I walked through the door. The house smelled different. The heater was on, even though it was summer. The carpet was filthy, there were dirty dishes everywhere, and Barb had never let the house go like that before.”
Something squeezed around Marley’s chest, and she fumbled for Mack’s hand, hearing the pain in his voice, knowing what was coming next. His wife had left him and taken their son. She had heard the story plenty of times in the military. Women and men alike, spouses who married into the military and then had a hard time being a single parent most of the time. Marley wanted to throw her arms around him and tell him she understood, but she held silent, some instinct inside her telling her to wait. That Mack needed to say the words out loud.
“I walked down the hallway, hearing my footsteps creak on the old wooden floorboards. That house was built in 1901. Barb fell in love with it and insisted she could refurbish it. And she did . . . she made the place shine. And then I heard it.”
Chills covered Marley’s arms despite the muggy heat. Had he walked in on her having an affair?
“Our bedroom door stood open at the end of the hall. I didn’t notice at first. She’d been napping. I was frozen in the doorway. I should’ve known something was off when I talked to her on the phone. She didn’t stay on the call as long as she usually did. She sounded so tired every time we spoke, but I’d been too busy to take notice. I had no idea what was really going on.”
The buzzing of insects and howling of monkeys seemed to fade into the distance as Marley listened to him speak. She wished for all the world that she could take the pain away from Mack. How could anyone ever cheat on this man? Anger swept over her on his behalf. She wanted to take him into her arms and kiss the woman’s memory away. And then Mack looked down at her and the raw pain in his eyes stole her breath.
“The woman lying in my bed was a pale shadow of my wife. There were IVs and other lines hooked up to her arms. It wasn’t even our bed—someone had moved in a hospital bed with rails on the sides. Her blonde hair was cut short. She weighed about forty pounds less than when I’d seen her last. I don’t even remember walking across the floor, but I did. I took her hand in mine and all I can remember is how cold it was. For a minute, I thought she was already dead.”
Marley’s anger was smothered under the heavy weight of shock. “You didn’t know?”
Mack kept talking like he hadn’t heard her speak. He wasn’t looking at her but through her. “I was off the grid. I had no idea. She woke up and turned to me. I could see how hard it was for her to smile, but she did. She squeezed my hand and gave me that same reassuring smile she’d given me after our son was born—when I was scared to death about being a father. She was always so strong.”
Tears slipped free from Marley’s eyes and she cupped his face, wishing for all the world she could take the memories from him. Part of her didn’t want to hear any more. The pain was too real, too hard to swallow.
“She must have sent my son away so she could talk to me alone. Her voice was so weak, I had to lean in close to hear her.”
More tears slipped free from Marley’s eyes. Mack’s cold and distant tone couldn’t hide the pain lining each word.
“She told me that she’d held on as long as she could, but it was time for her to go. She told me to fight for our son.” He paused and cleared his throat. “Then she said she loved me. She died with me holding her hand. There was nothing I could do to keep her. I don’t know how long I stood there staring at her, reeling from the shock. Then Cooper came home. I was ready to catch him, to tell him the news about his mother, but he wouldn’t even come into the room. He just glared at me from the doorway with a murderous look in his eyes.
“While I was out on deployment, he’d been taking care of his mother alone. He and I both knew that I should’ve been there, that I should’ve known. He became a man and filled my shoes. I filed a family emergency leave of absence and canceled all my future deployments. Took a job behind the desk on base and stayed home with him every day that I could, but he never forgave me. He moved out the minute he graduated from high school and hasn’t spoken to me since.”
“Oh, Mack, you can’t blame yourself for that.” Marley leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist, trying to anchor him to her and offer all the comfort and reassurance she could.
“Yes, I can. I should’ve known what was going on in my own house, but I was so focused on the mission and my job that I lost sight of my family. And because of that I lost them both.”
His voice was void of emotion. Dead. She could feel him withdrawing from her. She scrambled for anything to say, anything to bring him back. She hadn’t known Mack that long, but she had known him long enough to realize he would never have intentionally abandoned his wife or son. Marley drew back and clasped his face in her hands, digging her fingers into his jaw to anchor him. “Did she tell anyone she was sick? Your family or her family?”
“Both of our parents were dead. It was just Cooper and her and me.”
“Did anyone else call and tell you?”
“It doesn’t matter. I was her husband. I was her friend. We’d been married for over fifteen years. I should’ve known there was something wrong.”
“And how could you have known if you were away defending your country, if no one told you the truth?”
Mack tensed, like he wanted to argue with her, but Marley wouldn’t let him. “It sounds to me like your wife was a strong woman who wanted you safe and focused on your mission no matter what. Based on everything you’ve said, she was smart and resourceful, she raised your son, remodeled the house, and she held on until you got home to say goodbye. She knew exactly what she was doing. You cannot blame yourself for that.”
A small tremor worked its way down Mack’s large frame—a crack in his shield. Needing to heal and comfort him more, she continued. “She made her choice; that’s not on you. That’s on her.”
Mack shuddered and Marley wrapped her arms around his shoulders and drew him down to her. His voice was harsh when he said, “I should’ve been there for my son.”
“Your son is still alive. You’re talking like he’s dead.”
“He might as well be. He won’t let me near him.”
Marley pulled back so she could stare into his eyes, the gray darkened to nearly midnight. “I don’t think you’re a man who gives up on his family, Mack. You’ll find a way to heal your relationship with your son. Didn’t Barbara tell you to fight for him?”
Mack’s chest stopped trembling, and he wrapped his arms around her waist once more. “When did you get so smart?”
“I have a degree in engineering and graduated at the top of my high school class. I’ve always been smart.” Marley gave a self-deprecating smile. “But it’s not hard to see how much you love your son or how hard you fight for your men. You’ll find a way back to Cooper. I know it.”
Mack swooped down and grabbed her, clutching her to his chest.
Marley buried her face in the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent. They stood like that for a long moment, wrapped around each other in the mouth of the cave, moonlight washing down over them. His strong heartbeat thudded against hers; she could feel him grappling with his emotions and marveled at his strength. She wanted to heal him to take some of the pain away. She kissed his neck gently, moving her lips in a steady line up to the hollow behind his ear. She could taste the salt on his skin, feel the trembling of his powerful frame. Marley took his earlobe between her teeth.
Mack shuddered; she could feel him hardening. “Marley, I need you.”
He said it against her hair and she knew this was a man who did not admit his weaknesses often. Right now, he needed her and she needed him just as much.
Chapter 14
Mack felt like his chest had been ripped wide open, revealing a gaping hol
e of despair. He’d known it was there, of course, but he’d never willingly stared into the abyss. Why had he told her about his past? He never talked to anyone about his past, about his wife’s death or Cooper’s hatred.
He’d never wanted to until now. Great waves of emotion rippled over him, trying to pull him down into that deep, dark hole. He should have known . . . he should have known about Barbara’s illness. He was the worst kind of bastard—he’d chosen his job over his family. And his son had turned his back on him, leaving Mack to do the only thing he knew how. To be a soldier.
He’d shoved those memories down deep and proceeded to pretend none of it had ever happened. Sure, he reached out to Cooper now and again, but when was the last time he’d really tried? Part of him thought Cooper was better off without his father in his life.
“You’ll find a way back to Cooper, I know it.” Marley was looking up at him with nothing but love and support in her eyes. There was no sign of the contempt he’d expected.
He couldn’t question it now, not when his need was so great. If he didn’t bury himself inside her and let her goodness wrap around him, the despair would eat him alive. Another great shudder racked his body as if he stepped into a blizzard of pain. “I need you.”
Marley took his hand and he allowed her to lead him back into the cave. She slowly drew his T-shirt up and over her head, leaving him to stare at her glorious naked body. Her breasts weren’t huge, but they were full and perfect for his hands, and her trim waist flared above her perfectly rounded hips. Her features were extraordinary and they radiated kindness and caring and understanding. He needed all of her right now.
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