by Ava Miles
They rose, and he followed her into her office where there were two computer stations against the wall. She and Elizabeth often challenged each other to what they all called Poker Duels.
“It wouldn’t surprise me,” Rhett said. “I’ve been telling you for years that you’re good enough to reach the final table.”
Of course she wanted to play in the big leagues. Just not all the time. And not necessarily as Jane Wilcox. She didn’t want the drama her parents would rain down on her if she tried that. Since playing as Raven wasn’t an option, either, she made do with her online matches with Rhett and any spontaneous poker games they played when spending time together, Elizabeth included.
“Not only is it easy to underestimate you because you’re…well, a woman,” he continued, “and cute as a button at that. But you look so sweet until you turn into Poker Medusa and destroy all the other players with your betting strategies.”
His praise always made her happy. “I’ve been happy to stay where I am mostly. These years with you and Elizabeth…well, I don’t know what I would have done without you two.”
Her life would just have continued in the lackluster way it had started. She would probably still be taking the anti-depressants she’d started in early high school at her mother’s insistence. Elizabeth had tossed them down the toilet and helped her live.
Rhett tugged her against his chest and rocked her. “Ah, now, don’t you be going there, or I’ll start tearing up. We all needed each other, and we made a family of ourselves. Now that family is expanding, and so are we. There will be some growing pains, but we’ll stay together.”
“You’re getting pretty wise, Rhett,” she murmured and squeezed him tight before letting go.
“And I’m glad you’ve found someone you care enough to entrust with the truth. Hell, wisdom seems to be pouring out of me today like oil from a used car, but I’ll just say it. The only way we can love someone and be loved is to share who we really are, the good and the bad, the ugly and the pretty. Being with Abbie has taught me that.”
To keep him from seeing her tears, she turned on the computers, wondering all the while what it would be like to have Matt love her and accept her like that. Even Raven. She wasn’t ashamed of anything she’d done as Raven, but considering what a decent man Matt was, she wasn’t sure he could accept her past. Or believe she wasn’t some of the things people had called her.
Would he understand why her family had driven her to become Raven? The point was moot for now, anyway. She would never share information about her new family—the family she’d chosen—without their knowledge and consent.
Rhett settled into the chair beside hers and brought up their favorite online poker site. “You ready?”
“You betcha.”
Chapter 14
Meeting up with Matt was usually the highlight of Jane’s day, but the knowledge that she intended to tell him all about her family and upbringing tonight made her feel like the mountain snowcap from across the valley had crashed into her stomach.
The sunset was releasing its first rays of light when she and the dogs arrived at the park, reminding her of the colorful ribbons her nanny had put into her hair when she went to kindergarten before her mother had laid down the law. Only one ribbon color. No multi-colored ones with rainbows or bunnies printed on them. And certainly not an assortment of thick ribbons woven through her then long, curling hair.
The wind was turning cold with the temperature falling from its record-breaking fifty degrees today. But when she shivered, it was from the memories coursing through her mind, not the weather. Only Elizabeth knew these stories, and she’d sometimes cried while sharing them with her friend. Would she be able to keep control of her emotions when she poured out the painful memories to Matt?
As the sunset streaked its pink, orange, and blue ribbons across the mountain range, she reached out as if to bring them inside herself. This was her time. These were her dreams. And she wasn’t going to let the past ruin anything. He could take a few tears if they came, and so could she.
There was nothing wrong with emotional honesty, a hard-fought lesson for her after a childhood of repression.
A car door slammed in the distance, and as she turned, she realized she’d been so caught up in her thoughts she hadn’t heard Matt pull up. Annie pranced in place and Rufus gave a little ruff as Matt opened the back seat for Henry.
The dog lurched on the leash, but at least Matt had gotten it onto him this time. There were a few runners in the park since it was so nice outside, a staggering forty degrees. But after the weeks of twenty-degree highs, today was lovely, and she’d taken a run earlier with Rufus while Annie hung out in the car.
As Matt came toward them, Jane could only marvel at his handsomeness. His broad shoulders made her fingers itch to trace the muscles she knew were underneath his black polar fleece. And those eyes. Even from where she stood, she could see the twinkle in that sea of blue. Since it was relatively warm, he’d forgone a hat, so the wind was playing with his thick brown hair. His jaw was granite, and she couldn’t wait to feel the rasp of his five o’clock shadow when he kissed her again.
Which she was hoping would happen shortly.
“Hi,” she called out, staying where she was along the park’s ridge.
“Hey,” he returned, his long legs eating up the distance between them. “Nice day, huh? If I hadn’t been busy, I would have gone skiing. Do you ski?”
“I’ve been taking lessons, and I graduated to the intermediate class a month ago.”
“Good,” he said as he stopped in front of her, Henry giving some ruffs for attention.
Matt leaned down and kissed her on the mouth as though it were the most natural thing in the world, as if it were okay to declare their connection in public.
His spontaneous act only confirmed her decision to tell him about her upbringing. She ran her hand down his chest because she could. It was nice to touch him this way.
“We should go skiing sometime,” he said, smiling down at her. “How was your day?”
“Good. Got in a nice run.” She didn’t mention seeing Rhett or the fact that they’d played poker for a few hours. Sure enough, she’d beat her boss, which always made her day. “What about you? You mentioned being busy.”
“Yeah. Had a friend up from Denver,” he said, leaning down to pet her dogs.
She did the same with Henry, who sprawled down on his back and displayed his belly. “Oh. Is he still here?”
“Nah, he had to get back. Work tomorrow.” Matt threw out one of his hands to the sky. “Man, it felt so good to tell him how little I’m working right now. That I actually have a life. I don’t dread Monday mornings like I used to.”
She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “You didn’t have a life before?”
He bumped her. “Smartass. I worked a ton. I went out a little. And I saw my family. There wasn’t time for a sunset stroll with a beautiful woman.”
He might not have had time for a stroll, but there certainly had been beautiful women. He was too handsome, nice, and successful for there not to have been.
“I’m not beautiful,” she said instantly, even though she adored the compliment. Her inner swan was gaining confidence, but she had a ways to go.
“Of course, you are,” he immediately said and put his hand on her arm, stopping her in her tracks.
“I’m petite and cute, but I’m not beautiful.” Swans could be cute. Maybe even a little mysterious.
He cupped her cheek and gazed at her with those banked fires in his eyes. “Well, you are to me.”
Her throat closed and all she wanted to do was embrace him right then, with the ribbons of sunset swirling around them, strengthening this bond she felt growing between them. “That’s nice of you to say.”
He reached for her free hand and held it as though they were a young couple going steady. “You women don’t ever see how truly beautiful you are. Trust me, I grew up with three sisters, and they all thought they were
just okay or all right, never beautiful. My friends always thought differently. Of course, if they acted on it without my sisters liking the attention, Andy and I would punch them because that’s what brothers do.”
Even though they were both wearing gloves, the warmth of his hand seemed to spread through her. “They were lucky to have you two. I always wished I’d had an older brother to look out for me,” she said bravely and cast a surreptitious glance to see how he reacted.
He gave her his full attention. “Go on.”
“My parents couldn’t have any children after me,” she said, and her throat suddenly felt as hot and thick as when she had a fever.
“That’s too bad,” he said.
“They really wanted a boy,” she continued, “to carry on the family name. Heck, to lead the family business.”
“A woman can lead the family business. You do have an MBA from Harvard.”
He was too insightful. It was like he already knew why she’d made certain decisions. “Yes, but I realized it wasn’t what I wanted.”
“And they didn’t like that, I’m guessing,” he commented, swinging her hand playfully while Henry barked at a flock of robins.
“No.” That one word seemed so inconsequential in comparison to how they’d reacted.
They continued to walk in silence—Henry barked at a few squirrels, but Jane only had to rebuke him a few times to quiet any mad outbursts. Matt was getting better at using the voice commands, but it was as though Henry wore earmuffs when it came to his master.
“What are you up to tonight?” Matt asked as they rounded a stretch of pines. “I was going to see my brother and nephew, but I’d rather spend my Sunday evening with you, eating pizza and watching a movie, if you’re up for it. I know we only went out last night, but—”
“Who cares?” she burst out, making him smile. “That sounds like fun.”
Plus she could tell him more about her family tonight, and part of her wanted to let out a dramatic sigh of relief.
“Good,” he said and squeezed her hand. “We can meet up a little later after finishing here. Give me some time to pick up the house. I swear I have more dog toys and accessories lying around than a new mommy.”
“Sounds nice.”
A few hundred yards down the path, a man running with a double baby jogger waved and called out, “Hey, guys.”
Squinting in the distance, Jane realized it was Brian. He stopped when he reached them, huffing from his run. Jane tried to let go of Matt’s hand, but he held firm and shot her a questioning look.
“Sunday’s my day off,” Brian said, “and since it’s so nice out, I decided to take Mia and Violet on my run. We just got this baby contraption. Isn’t it the coolest?”
When Jane peered through the clear plastic, the little girls gazed back at her unblinkingly. Then they smiled in tandem, drool running down their cherub mouths.
“Want a better look?” Brian asked, unzipping the cover.
They banged their fists in the air as the cold air hit them, but they still grinned at their dad.
“They’re beautiful,” Jane said.
Henry, of course, tried to nose in on them, and when Matt held him back, he barked, making one of the girls cry.
“No, Henry,” Jane said in a firm voice. He immediately stopped.
“You really are good with him,” Brian said. “And hey, man,” he said punching Matt on the shoulder. “Jill tells me she’s going to be helping you run for mayor. She mentioned it when we had our Sunday brunch today. It’s always our opportunity for catching up on adult talk. With the girls and our crazy schedules, we have to set aside a time not to do baby stuff. It’s nuts when they’re this little. Like some kind of time vacuum.”
The words didn’t register at first since he continued to chat about life with twins. It was almost like Jane was hearing them through a tunnel. And then they hit her right in the solar plexus. Matt was running for mayor?
Oh dear God, no.
“I’m happy for you, man,” Brian continued. “I can’t say I’ve ever thought about going into politics, but it suits you. You’ll be great for Dare, and Jill’s over the moon about it. I was worried at first since she wants to run herself someday, but she’s completely cool with it. Between these little ones and our jobs, we have our hands full at the moment, and she sees helping you as great training for when she does throw her name in the ring. Plus, she says you’re bringing in some big-shot political consultant from Denver to help out, and she wants to absorb as much as she can from him.”
Big-shot political consultant? Was that his friend who’d visited from Denver?
Matt said nothing beside her, just glanced down at her with a tight mouth.
Jane didn’t understand why he was acting like that, and it really didn’t matter. She was dead inside now. She’d fallen for a man who wanted to be in the same profession she’d done everything to free herself from. As she scanned the sky, she realized the colorful ribbons of sunset were gone, replaced with grays and deepening shades of black.
It was as if the sky had smothered her dreams.
Jane’s hand went limp in Matt’s and fell from his grasp.
“Well, it’s getting dark,” Brian finally said, “and it takes forever to buckle the girls into the car.”
“We’ll help you,” Jane assured him, taking off for the parking lot. “As you said, it’s getting dark.”
She had to get out of there. Now. The hurt was welling, and she wasn’t sure she could hold it in.
They were over before they’d barely begun.
God, it was so unfair.
How could he not have mentioned his plans? As they walked back, Brian chatting easily about the babies and the restaurant with Matt responding in monosyllables, their conversation a buzz in her ears. Suddenly she realized a stark reality: they hadn’t known each other that long. That’s why he hadn’t mentioned it. He didn’t think he owed her any explanations.
She guessed it was a good thing she’d found this out now, before she’d spilled her own guts. What if Rhett had given her the go-ahead to tell him about her years as a poker scout?
Disaster averted. No one had been hurt.
Except for her.
Henry barked suddenly at a few people leaving the park, but she was too numb to stop him. She could feel Matt’s eyes on her, but she kept her gaze down. So he definitely sensed something was off. Well, she couldn’t let that affect her right now.
If she focused on taking one step at a time, she could get into the car and then just leave.
She knew what time he came to the park, so it would be easy to avoid him.
The first bubble of pain rose from her heart to her chest.
She wasn’t much help to Brian, after all, standing there mute. But Matt unzipped one carrier and unhooked one of the babies, easily settling her against his chest. The scene cracked her heart like an anvil. He was a pro with babies.
Well, it would make kissing them for the media all the easier, she thought.
Her father hadn’t held her much growing up, but he’d never turned down a chance to hold a stranger’s child, beaming at the cameras with his perfect white teeth.
“I need to run,” she finally said. “Matt, I just realized I can’t break off my plans with Elizabeth tonight, so we’ll have to get together another time.”
When she gave Henry a goodbye pat, she realized she was breaking her promise to help Matt with this grieving dog. The bubble burst, and she fled to the car, tears burning in her eyes.
“Jane,” Matt said, jogging after her, putting his hand on her arm when she opened the back door. “Wait a sec.”
“I can’t,” she said, grinding her teeth to control her emotions. “I need to go. See you later.”
She pushed the dogs inside, something she never did, and hurriedly opened her door.
Brian was staring at her, his mouth twisted into a frown. Henry started barking as she reversed, and Matt only kicked at some snow.
Th
e tears started to fall before she cleared the parking lot.
The one thing she’d sworn never to do was fall in love with a man like her father, a man who wanted to be in the spotlight, a man who wanted to be in politics.
And she’d done just that.
Chapter 15
Matt watched Jane race off and fought a curse word. Brian shut the door to the SUV to keep the twins warm and shoved his fingers through his curly brown hair.
“Sorry, man. I had no idea she didn’t know. I thought you two were dating.”
His plan to get her to share her background first hadn’t worked, although in the park tonight, as she’d started to talk about being an only child and a disappointment, he’d been certain she was about to tell him the whole story. A thrill of hope had shot through his heart while he listened and watched the sunset crest over her creamy cheekbones.
He hadn’t been completely sure how she’d react to his news. Well, now he knew.
Badly.
“I need to go after her,” he said and headed to his SUV. “See ya, Brian.”
As he took off to her house, he realized they were about ready to have it out, and perhaps that was a good thing. They wouldn’t be able to make it as a couple if they continued to keep things from each other.
And he very much wanted to see where these newfound feelings would take them.
Henry jumped into the front seat, whining, but Matt was too focused on reaching her house to bother disciplining him. It was as though the dog knew they were running after Jane. When he arrived, smoke was just starting to puff out of her chimney.
He leashed Henry, who for once didn’t fight him, and jogged up the steps to her house and knocked on her door. As he waited, his chest constricted like it did when he was about to deliver a closing argument on a case he knew could go either way.
He knocked again. Henry barked this time and pawed at the door.
No answer.
So, she was going to ignore him, was she? Well, if there was one thing he wasn’t going to accept, it was the silent treatment. Being ignored only pissed him off and made him more determined.
