by P. J. Hoover
“Eighteen, huh?”
I nod, eating the casserole.
He looks to my mom. “And I see you have a tattoo.”
“I got it a week ago.” I hold out my arm so he can see my left bicep.
He raises his eyebrows when he reads it. “Sacrifice.”
Again, I realize everyone knows Ancient Greek except me.
He reaches across the table to touch it. “It’s fading.”
I nod. “I think the artist may have messed up. I may have to get it reinked.” But my stomach clenches when I say it. I know the fading has nothing to do with the ink and everything to do with Chloe almost dying. I decide not to try to revive it in front of my mom and my father.
My father pulls up the sleeve on his T-shirt. “I have a tattoo, also.”
That’s putting it mildly. I lean over to get a better look. It looks like every natural disaster possible has been inked on his shoulder. There are cosmic reds and greens and bright yellows, blended together into a pattern which almost seems to shift and change in front of my eyes.
“Wow. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.”
He nods and rolls his sleeve back down. “Thank you, Piper.” And he winks at me.
“Did you get it in prison?” I ask because Chloe’s brother told us about all the people who get tattoos in prison.
He raises an eyebrow and looks sideways at my mom. “Prison?”
My mom remains silent.
“I thought you were in prison,” I say. “That you caused the water still explosion out west and you got caught.”
My father actually laughs. I think most people would be furious at an accusation like this, but he laughs. “And let me guess, your mother told you that.”
My mom twists up her face. “Well, what was I supposed to tell her? That you didn’t have time to raise a daughter?”
“You can tell her what you like, Lucia. I’m sure Piper will find the truth on her own.”
I know in that instant everything my mom’s told me about my dad is a lie.
Next to me, my mom slams her fork on the plate. It clatters like a bell, such that, four tables over, people turn and look. “Are we done here yet?”
“Done?” My father laughs. “I’m only getting started. So tell me, Piper, do you have a boyfriend?”
I almost drop my spoon at the question, catching it before it lands on my lap. But I do manage to get a giant drop of sauce on my leg. I wipe it off, licking my finger.
“Piper does not have a boyfriend.” My mom answers for me.
I open my mouth to protest but then stop. I have Shayne, and then there’s Reese. But neither of them are appropriate conversations to have given the present company. So instead, I nod. “Right. No boyfriend.” I glance over sideways at my mom who smiles like a fox that’s gotten away.
“Oh, come on now. A pretty girl like you? Certainly you have young men declaring their undying love for you every day.” And his blue steel eyes meet mine and hold them.
My heart begins to pound; I feel it in my temples. But I hold my face steady and force a smile to my lips. “Only in my daydreams.”
He grins, and I feel like we’ve shared some secret. A secret even I don’t know. “Well, you have your whole life ahead of you.” He grabs his beer bottle and lifts it to his mouth, drinking the remainder down in one large swallow. Even though I don’t drink beer, it’s still impressive.
“Piper has no need for boyfriends.” My mom spears a cherry tomato with her fork and puts it in her mouth whole. She chews it, and we both watch her, waiting until she’s finished. “We have each other and that’s all we’ll ever need.”
My father slaps the table, causing the plates to rattle against the silverware. “Nonsense. Piper, how would you like to come stay with me for a few months?”
My mom rockets up out of her seat. “How dare you? Piper is not going to stay with you.”
My father looks at her, commanding her to sit down with his eyes. She glares at him but settles back into the booth.
“Why not, Lucia? You and I both know Piper would benefit from some time away from you.”
I guess this means my father is aware of my mom’s desire to control me. But I have to admit, the thought of getting away, of getting to know my father a little bit better, is like new flowers planted in a garden. Like tendrils of the life I want to lead are breaking into my world, trying to lay down roots. And I plan to give them as much room as they need.
“Well, for starters, Peter, what would your wife say about that?”
My face freezes at the question. Whether it’s the fact that my father now has a name or that he is married I’m not sure. But of course I’m eighteen years old. Why wouldn’t he have a wife? And there could be other kids in the mix. Half brothers and sisters I’ve never met.
“My wife, if you must know, will tolerate it.” He waves his hand, and a waitress sees it. He holds up his beer bottle, and she turns to get him another one. “She’ll obey whatever I ask when it comes right down to it.”
Obey seems such a strange word. But I think of the way my mom relented with the barbeque sauce. Did my mom stop obeying him? Is that why they split up? “How did you two meet?” I take a sip of my iced tea after I ask, wondering if either of them will bother answering. And then I watch their faces.
My mom sneers, and I’m sure she’ll start in on some story of how she was horribly wronged by this awful man here at the table with us. But after meeting him, I know in my heart this cannot be the truth.
At the question, however, my father’s face softens. “Your mother is quite a charmer, Piper. Did you know that?”
I shake my head and look at her. The sneer falls from her face, and she actually blushes. “No. I had no idea,” I say. Charmer and mother are two words I never would have put in the same sentence.
But my dad nods. “Yes. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her.”
My mom laughs, but it’s not the snide laugh which up until now has permeated the conversation. “You fall in love with everyone you see.”
My father angles his head. “Not untrue. I do admit it. I have an eye for beautiful creatures. But of them, your mom rose to the top. If I weren’t already previously engaged, I may have married her on the spot. Instead, the day we met, I took the one moment of bliss I could and left it at that.”
The truth hits me. My mom and dad were never married. And beyond that, I was nothing more than the result of a one night stand. My mom. The woman who acts like Earth will implode if I so much as utter the name of a boy at school. She slept with my father the moment she met him and ended up pregnant.
I turn to her and wait. Wondering what she’ll say. Wondering if she’ll deny it. Or defend her actions. Or anything. But my old mom returns, and she deflects the conversation. “Piper will not be staying with you. You’re a bad influence, and besides, she and I have been talking about moving anyway. Having her out and about will not do at all.”
My father raises an eyebrow. “Lucia—”
She interrupts. “I’m serious about this. I don’t think you want me to be more clear, do you?”
My father shrugs. “Would things be any worse than they are now?”
I have no clue what he’s talking about. But I’m not about to interrupt.
My mom nods. “Yes. Things will be worse. Of that you can be sure.”
The waitress comes over, holding another beer. My father takes it, but, at the same time, my mom stands up. “Piper, we’re leaving.”
I look to my father. His grin has come back, and he lifts the beer in a “cheers” sign. “Darling daughter. It’s been a true joy meeting you.”
I don’t want to stand up. To leave. But my mom’s eyes are on me. “Will I see you again?” I ask.
“Absolutely.” He stands and turns to my mom. “A kiss for old time’s sake?”
She scoffs. “Please.” But her face is flushed; even I can see it.
“You’re still just as beautiful as you were so
long ago, darling Lucia.” My father reaches out and cups her chin with his fingers. Something inside me stirs as I remember Shayne doing the same thing to me. And then my father leans over and kisses my mom full on the lips. Her body freezes, but her lips relent, and she kisses him back with everything she has. It’s a part of my mom I never would have believed existed. But here it is, right in the middle of Pok-e-Jo’s Barbeque. And more than ever, at this moment in time, I want to travel back to Hell. To be with Shayne forever. To live a life of love and happiness I’ve never known before. And I wonder if my mom doesn’t crave something similar.
Chapter 30
Tears
Teaching is pointless on Friday. The teachers give it a try, but all anyone wants to talk about is the hurricane and Councilman Rendon dying. I look for Chloe at lunch, and when she doesn’t show, I text her.
“will u b in stdy hall?” I send.
Her response is short. Too short. “have plans”
“what plans?”
“crazy. ttyl”
I’m not sure what she’s referring to when she says crazy: her plans, the world, or herself. I send her a quick response and head to class.
When I walk into Social Sciences, my heart flips over in place a few times. Shayne’s sitting there, waiting for me. He moves his arm off the chair next to him so I can sit down.
“Don’t the teachers wonder why you’re here so little?” In the last couple weeks, he’s been in class all of three days. I’d wonder where he was if I didn’t already know. But even still, being in Hell doesn’t explain why he can’t make it to class. Especially if he really does want to see me.
Shayne looks at Mr. Kaiser. He’s just uncapping his dry erase marker—purple this time—and the smell drifts through the air.
“Being a god does have its powers, Piper. The teachers hardly notice me. Remember, they think I’ve been here all year?”
I smile, and in a moment of utter insanity, I lean over and kiss him lightly on the mouth. He tastes like a rustic campfire mixed with something so intense it pulls at every part of my insides.
“I like that,” he says when I pull my head back.
“I like that you like that,” I say. And this time he leans forward and kisses me.
Mr. Kaiser clears his throat and starts class. It’s not like Randy and Hannah weren’t always making out before class. But now, with Randy gone, that won’t happen again.
“So what are your powers?” I whisper.
Shayne laughs and keeps his head close to me. “Like being near you for starters.”
I fix him with a look that tells him he’s full of crap. “I hardly call that a power,” I say.
A smile plays on his lips. “What would you call a power?”
“Hmmm…” I put my finger to my mouth pretending I’m in deep thought. “Maybe breaking down brick walls. Or climbing up the sides of buildings.”
“I’m a god, not a superhero,” Shayne says.
I hear Mr. Kaiser clear his throat again. With Randy Conner dead, the class has been drained of all comedic relief, and Shayne’s laugh stands out like a wart.
“Would you like to share what’s so funny, Piper?” Mr. Kaiser says.
I look around and realize the whole class is staring at me. Now why hadn’t he asked Shayne to explain the joke? I shrug. “We were valuing the powers of superheroes.” I glance sideways at Shayne and see he’s twirling his stylus on his hand.
Mr. Kaiser raises an eyebrow and then turns and writes the word SUPERHERO in large purple letters on the board behind him. He caps the marker and turns back around. “So what power would you want if you were a superhero?” He’s not asking me, but the whole class in general.
“How about flying?” someone suggests.
Mr. Kaiser turns and writes flying on the board. “What else?”
“Invisibility—cause then I could sneak into the girls’ locker room,” someone else says.
It’s a stereotypical male answer, and it garnishes a stereotypical female reaction of eye rolling, name calling, and laughter. But Mr. Kaiser writes invisibility on the board nonetheless.
Most of the answers are funny, even expected, such as my climbing buildings or breaking down walls. There’s an enormous sense of release descending on our Social Sciences class, and I look over at Shayne and grin. He reaches out across the aisle, takes my hand, and squeezes it.
The white board is just about full when Mr. Kaiser says, “How about one more thing?”
“I’d like to bring people back from the dead.”
It’s Hannah, Randy’s girlfriend. I still remember her face at the funeral—frozen into a state of repressed sorrow.
Silence falls on the class faster than a flash flood in a dry creek bed. I have no idea what to say, and I’m pretty sure no one else does either. Shayne’s still holding my hand, but lets it go and turns around to face her.
“Why?”
It’s a simple question but an unexpected one all the same. I can’t believe he’s asked it.
“Why what?” Hannah’s staring at him, and I know their eyes are locked.
“Why would you want to bring someone back?”
Hannah lets out a gasp of exasperation, and, for a second, I think she’s going to get up and come punch Shayne. The silence in the class is so solid, I can hear the mercury in the thermometer rising.
Hannah breaks the silence. “I think that’s pretty obvious.”
But Shayne keeps at it. “What if Randy is at peace? Why would you want to bring him back?”
Hannah jumps to her feet. “How could he be at peace? He’s left his family here with that monster of a father. He’s left me here.” She glares at Shayne, and I think she’s trying to evaporate him with her eyes. “Did you know I’m pregnant?”
When she says it, I realize my heart is pounding in my chest, and I’ve forgotten to breathe. I don’t want to move. Don’t want to draw any attention to myself.
“Yes.” Shayne’s so calm it’s like a violent contradiction to the rage and sadness pouring off her.
I’m staring at Hannah, watching her face. It’s red, but her eyes are dry—just like at the funeral. And she’s carrying Randy Conner’s baby.
“Yes what?” she demands.
“Yes, I knew.” And whether Hannah, Mr. Kaiser, or anyone else in the class believes Shayne, I do. “But why would you want to bring him back?”
I can’t believe he’s pressing her. I almost open my mouth at this point and tell him to stop, but my mouth feels pinned shut.
Hannah doesn’t speak. Her mouth’s opening, but nothing’s coming out.
“What if you knew he was happy? Why would you bring him back here?”
Hannah stands there looking at Shayne. Her eyes grow lighter, and soon tears pour down her face. They flow like the River Acheron, full of sorrow, and I know this is the first time she’s cried since Randy died. Her hands move to her stomach as she cries, and I think about the baby. It’ll grow up without a father. Just like me. But its father will be dead, unlike mine. And its father will not abuse it like Randy’s.
“Because I miss him.” Hannah manages to get the words out between her tears, and within moments, someone gets up and helps her out of the room.
I’m staring at the place where she was, watching the door swing closed. And when I look at Shayne, he’s staring forward, twirling the stylus on his hand. I want to say something to him, but he’s not looking at me, and if he knows I’m trying to get his attention, he’s ignoring me. So I turn forward and see Mr. Kaiser erasing the white board. With the purple dry erase marker, he writes GHC: WHAT YOU CAN DO at the top of the board, underlines it three times, and we get on with lecture.
Chapter 31
Sleep
Shayne waits for me after school. I think he’s left, but when I get to my locker at the end of the day, he’s there holding it open already.
“I don’t know if you helped Hannah or made things worse.” I’ve been going over it in my head since class l
et out. On the one hand, Hannah finally released her sorrow. On the other hand, she did it in front of the entire class.
“I think I helped.”
My mind’s been telling me the same thing, but I want to hear Shayne say it. “You’re always so sure of yourself,” I say.
Shayne gives a small shrug like he’s trying to not act cocky. “Not always.”
“Lots of the time.”
“Yeah, lots of the time,” he says.
“I can’t believe Hannah’s pregnant,” I say. “I had no clue.”
“Only she and Randy knew,” Shayne says. “Randy told me when he crossed.”
It’s just one more piece of his memory for Randy to leave behind in the River Lethe.
Shayne shuts my locker and takes my hand. “Can I walk you home?”
“Of course.” Chloe’s skipping, so I can’t take the shuttle with her. I have to wonder if she’s with Reese until I catch his scent in the air.
A wave of darkness covers Shayne’s face. “Why won’t he stay away from you?”
I lift my head and see Reese across the corridor. When our eyes meet, he winks at me.
Shayne’s hand tightens like a clamp on mine, and he takes a step in Reese’s direction.
Reese’s eyebrows arch like he’s surprised Shayne would challenge him. I wonder if Shayne will start a fight right here in the middle of school with so many people around. If so, Reese must be up for it because, in five quick strides, he stands directly in front of us.
Reese glances at Shayne and then reaches over and brushes my cheek, sending a flurry of goose bumps down my neck. I’d be lying if I said revulsion was the sole cause of those goose bumps because all I can focus on is his scent. I scoot backward to get out of his reach.
“Have you missed me, Piper?” Reese asks.
I open my mouth to tell him I’m not interested in him, but words won’t come out. Shayne’s hand feels like it will snap the bones in my fingers in half. I wince, and he lets go though he stays close.
