by Angela Horn
After they finished eating, Joaquin felt Heidi studying him with an odd expression. Taking his hand, she looked him in the eyes and spoke in English.
“When I was in college, I had the only real boyfriend I’ve ever had and I really liked him. The thing about college is that the whole atmosphere is about hooking up and being free with yourself, you know?”
Joaquin nodded, watching her intently.
“I really liked this guy and he seemed to like me. He wanted me and I think I wanted him too. I wanted to keep him, that’s for sure. Whenever we kissed or tried to be together though, I’d want to throw up. Being physical with him made me sick,” Heidi said, with a quick smile at Maximo who stared at them both.
“I’m not telling you this because I feel differently with you. I think that’s obvious. I just think that because you’ve done bad things and been with women, you don’t believe you’re worthy of my love. I just wanted you to know that I would have done things too, but I wasn’t strong enough to overcome God’s warnings. It’s not that I’m better than you, just weaker. We’re both flawed. Maybe that was obvious to you, but I wasn’t sure.”
Joaquin kissed her hand then glanced at Maximo who stared at them frowning.
“What?” Joaquin asked.
“I never dream this. What did she say?”
Joaquin and Heidi smiled. “She said she loves me.”
Maximo nodded, taking another piece of bread. Joaquin watched the boy chew his food and Heidi fiddle with her straw and realized he hadn’t checked for possible threats since arriving at the restaurant. He felt safe for the first time in decades, truly free from danger.
After lunch, they drove to the church and spoke with Father Francisco about a wedding. A few hours later, as evening approached, the ceremony began in a place not on any map.
The setting sun illuminated the dilapidated church, giving a golden hue to everything inside. Heidi’s blonde hair shimmered as if a halo rested upon her head.
The priest’s words echoed in Joaquin’s head as he marveled at how just a week earlier he had lamented his disinterest in everything. Yet, now he suffered with the immensity of his love for this woman and that boy and the God who brought them into his life.
Gazing at a smiling Heidi, he searched for signs she worried over this choice she made for her future. Instead of concern, she radiated joy, alternating between grinning at Maximo and the man she knew so little and desired to marry so much. Joaquin trusted in that smile and returned it as Father Francisco pronounced them husband and wife.
Joaquin wiped the tears from Heidi’s face as he kissed her, whispering his love as if afraid to admit it to the world. Heidi kissed him back, pulling at his shirt, suddenly overwhelmed. Nuzzling against him, she trembled. Before he might think she was upset, Heidi laughed and reached for Maximo.
“God has blessed us,” she said, holding them both tightly.
Joaquin could have stayed there forever, just holding onto his precious family and ignoring all of the ugliness in the world. Maximo though squirmed away from the embrace.
“We eat now,” he said, pulling at Heidi.
Heidi nodded, taking Maximo and Joaquin’s hands. Walking down the aisle, she thanked Father Francisco who waved goodbye to Maximo.
Opening the front doors of the church, Joaquin was startled to find dark clouds covering the land, turning the late day into black night. An angry outpouring rained from the sky. Frowning, Joaquin glanced at Heidi whose smile faded at this development.
“I don’t understand,” Maximo said, truly confused for the first time.
Joaquin might have assumed a thunderstorm was no more than a changing weather pattern, but he knew something else was stirring. He felt fear in his chest, the kind that tore at him during his encounter with the monster at the prison.
In the downpour, Joaquin could barely spot their car a few yards away. Yet, he noticed a small detail on a nearby tree. Neither Maximo nor Heidi saw it, but Joaquin knew the white thing was the clawed hand of the monster that promised him misery.
The talons scratched at the tree, tearing away bark before disappearing. Joaquin might have convinced himself it was a light distortion from the storm, but he knew evil had followed them to this holy place. Tightening his grip on Heidi’s hand, he also knew the monster waited in the darkness for the opportunity to make good on its threat.
Chapter Sixteen
The warm ocean water splashed against Lila’s ankles. Glancing down, she could see her feet through the crystal blue water as a balmy Caribbean breeze circled her. Studying the white beach, she noticed a beautiful Asian woman strolling passively in the water. Lila watched the woman without curiosity, her mind detached from who she might be.
Moments passed before she realized this place was silent. Not a hint of noise from the splashing water to the casually flowing breezes. Turning back to the beach, Lila found a man standing a few yards from her. The man was handsome, lean and tan. He wore only a pair of cutoff shorts. Oblivious to Lila, he moved into the ocean until the water was at his waist. His eyes were on the woman who stood in the surf.
Watching him for what felt like too long, Lila sensed something in her hand. Studying the small white object, she realized it was a postcard with a picture of the same beach she now stood upon. Turning it over, she comprehended the words slowly as if reading for the first time.
Dear Lila,
Having a great time! Wish you were here!
Love, Micah
Glancing up from the card, she found the man standing in front of her.
With a smile, he said, “I have time. You must hurry.”
Lila awoke to a world of pain. Her eyes only opened for a few seconds before the dim light became too much. Closing her eyes, she did a quick damage check of her body. Lila found she could move her toes, but not lift her legs. Wanting to turn her head, she fought her stiff neck which achingly complied.
Forcing her eyes open again, she immediately recognized Roman next to her. It took her a long minute to realize he was asleep though. Blotches of dried blood darkened his face and his breathing lacked the tranquility of the hotel room, but otherwise he seemed unharmed.
Lila tried to speak, just to whisper his name, but her dry lips barely opened, let alone released noise. Giving up, she closed her eyes and again surveyed the damage to her body. She quickly realized everything hurt even those wiggling toes. Not only was the pain intense, it was increasing with every minute she remained conscious.
As tears leaked down her cheeks, Lila was startled by the scorching heat of them. Lila was helpless to stop the tears or the whimpering. So focused on remaining calm, she never noticed her right hand was cradled in Roman’s hand. Or how when she squeezed her fingers into a fist that she squeezed his hand. When he called her name, Lila opened her eyes, barely seeing him.
“Are you in pain?” he asked, before calling for help from someone named Gus.
Nodding, Lila hated to admit her weakness, as if somehow she might alleviate her suffering through sheer willpower. Flinching at his touch, Lila wished to pass out and find a reprieve from the pain for long enough to give her strength. Her body instead responded with more pain.
Around her, Lila could feel movement, maybe Roman sitting up or her body convulsing. New voices joined Roman’s. She only heard her husband speaking at first. Gus then spoke up with a voice full of anxiety. She recognized Sophie’s trembling whispers, but Lila refused to open her eyes.
Their voices implied fear, maybe panic, and she wanted to remain calm, even if her situation naturally led to despair. Their panic wouldn’t help her, so she ignored their words and focused on Roman’s hand holding hers. His hand soon trembled and his fear infected her.
A pinch in her arm startled her, but Lila knew what it meant and hoped the medicine would work. A rush of fuzzy heat rolled over her body. Lila gave into the drug, embracing its power and the freedom from pain it promised.
Hearing Roman’s whispers in her ear, the words felt f
oreign, though their meaning was clear. He felt responsible for her pain and guilty for bringing her back in such an unnatural way. There was so much suffering in his words that she wished she might console him, but the drug pulled her away.
Lila prayed to dream and escape from the anguish. This new place provided no escape though, only darkness.
Opening her eyes, Lila searched for light, but found not a hint of illumination. Even as her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she remained blind. She soon realized this place existed without light for it was a place without God.
Lila ached with a fear far worse than any she had known before. The terror burned her from the inside out until she begged to see the light again. Yet something warned her seeing what was in this darkness would be worse.
Closing her eyes, Lila flinched against the movements from the monsters around her. Refusing to open her eyes, Lila would not look at what should remain unseen. Around her, the things growled and chafed her skin as they prowled closer.
The monsters’ growling intensified, closer to her face, echoing in her ears. Hungering for her, they snapped at Lila, their jaws clicking in the darkness. The urge to open her eyes and fight back grew intense, but Lila refused to give in.
The first bite piercing her thigh, the monster yanked her down to the icy ground and dragged her farther into this hell. Lila struggled to stop the momentum, even opening her eyes in the hopes of finding something to grab onto in this frigid place. She instead witnesseda face so monstrous her mind refused to comprehend the sight of it. A face some part of Lila knew was her own.
The monster released her leg, allowing her to fall deeper into the frigid darkness. Screaming now, Lila begged to be given another chance. Her only answer was a chorus of taunting screeches around her.
Awakening to her cries, Lila flinched at the brightness of the sun lit room. Embracing the light, Lila saw how it illuminated Roman’s worried face, Gus’s red hair, and Sophie’s shiny shotgun. More than the light and familiar faces, Lila felt reassured by God’s presence. His warmth quickly soothed her terror. Relaxing in the knowledge that she had another chance, Lila focused her attention on Roman and tried to smile.
“Worst dream ever,” she said, her voice cracked and alien.
Roman nodded, touching her face. Wiping her forehead, he frowned at Gus.
“She’s running a fever.”
While Sophie and Gus moved closer with their matching frowns, Roman’s expression teetered more towards dread.
“I don’t know, man,” Gus said. “No one’s ever come back from that kind of wound. I don’t know what’s normal.”
“Is she still in pain?” Sophie asked, switching the weapon from one arm to the other.
Lila hated how they spoke of her as if she weren’t there. The image of Sophie holding the shotgun suddenly seemed hilarious though and she began to laugh. The giggles echoed in her head as she faded from their chatter again.
Lila dreamed of a busy street in an unfamiliar city. Even knowing she was dreaming, she felt pain when a female hunter pushed roughly past her. The dark haired hunter glanced back at Lila and gave her a little snarl, even if her eyes were amused. Rushing to keep up, Lila soon realized they were on the streets of New Orleans. Passing throngs of revelers, Lila hurried her pace when the hunter crossed a street.
Heading into a liquor store, Lila lost sight of the hunter. She instead found a dozen humans roaming up and down the aisles. Scanning the faces for her mystery hunter, she noticed a villain eyeing the crowd from a spot near the back. Just as it pulled out a gun and started firing, a hand yanked Lila to the ground.
Her mysterious hunter snorted. “Some big dog you are. Looking pretty overrated to me.”
Lila thought to say something, but she was dreaming and arguing with someone in a dream seemed stupid. When the villain reloaded its gun, the hunter jumped to her feet and aimed a crossbow at her target. Lila stood up, just in time to see the arrow puncture the villain’s head.
Head shots were nice, but the arrow seemed inefficient. Lila thought to say something to that effect, but then the villain’s head exploded. Flinching, she could only stare at the mess left behind.
“Explosive charges,” the hunter said with a shrug. “That’s just how Ivy rolls.”
Lila woke to the real world with a gasp. Studying the room, Lila realized that during her latest nap she had been moved. This new location smelled better or maybe that was just her.
Lila felt clean, her old clothes, hardened from dried blood, were gone. Her skin cleansed, even her hair felt damp, Lila’s body was renewed. Ready to sit up, she quickly realized her improvements were only skin deep.
“Don’t try to get up,” Roman said, stepping closer.
Lila’s fingers moved from the IV in her arm to the still throbbing chest wound hidden under a bandage. Running her tongue over her teeth, she tasted mint.
“Did you brush my teeth?”
Roman nodded without smiling, no longer able to feign strength or calm. Lila smiled at the idea of him taking care of her. For the first time, she didn’t mind being babied and was just happy to have him close. Reaching for his hand, she sighed.
“I guess that whole knowing every inch of my body thing came in handy during the bathing process, huh?”
Roman still refused to smile, even as he took her hand.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I just wanted you to stay with me.”
“Hush. We both know I wouldn’t be here, if God didn’t will it.”
Roman nodded, yet showed no signs of believing her words.
“I had a dream about Ivy,” Lila said, unsure how to distract from all of the guilt written on his face.
“What kind of dream? Do you remember her?”
“No, but I know where her new pack is.”
Roman’s sad face finally perked up and he glanced at the door then back at Lila.
“The hunter at the restaurant was from your pack too. Sophie ID’d her from a picture. I guess Gus is right about the old gang getting back together.”
“I also dreamed of Micah.”
Roman smiled just a hint, still bothered by her suffering, even as God’s plan gained clarity. He held her hand and sat silently as the IV dripped next to him. Lila watched Roman, wishing she knew how to make him happy, but he was still a stranger to her in so many ways.
Neither spoke which allowed Lila to survey her body, wiggling her toes and trying to lift her legs. Both actions took enough effort to tire her. Exhausted after being awake a whole ten minutes, she accepted her vulnerability. If something attacked right then, Lila could do no more than watch it happen.
Outside the sun dipped over the horizon and the natural light in the room slipped away. The growing darkness sent a chill down Lila’s spine and she felt the fear returning.
Outside in the adjoining yard, the watcher dogs growled at one another, playfully fighting. Even knowing what the sounds and darkness meant, Lila could only think of her dream and the sense of God’s abandonment. Giving into her fear, she pulled at Roman’s hand.
“I need you to be closer.”
“Are you in pain?”
“No,” Lila said, eyeing the darkening evening.
Roman studied Lila for a moment and she started to worry he might refuse to embrace her. He seemed almost afraid of her now. Whatever was behind his hesitancy, he forced himself to lie down.
Studying his beautiful face, Lila remembered her fear of losing him as she lay dying in the parking lot. Now, he was with her again, his warm touch soothing away her pain and fear.
“Can you keep a secret?” Lila said.
Roman nodded, his eyes hypnotized by her wound.
“This is something between you and me and God. You’ll never tell anyone, right?”
Curious now, Roman looked into Lila’s eyes. “What is it?”
“I know we aren’t meant for such things and I feel guilty for even suggesting a desire for this, but I do wish we could just walk away from this mis
sion for a little bit. Just be alone, so we could get to know each another again.”
Roman nodded. “All hunters experience moments of weakness.”
Lila frowned as her hazel eyes threatened tears. “Why are you talking to me like I’m some trainee?”
Fidgeting on the bed, Roman looked ready to get up. He finally sighed.
“I don’t know what you want me to say?”
“I’m scared. I’ve lost my confidence. Can’t you give me a pep talk, instead of speaking to me like I’m a newbie hunter you don’t know?”
“Of course, you’re scared. You died and are in pain. Hunters don’t usually suffer from their wounds like you have. When you died before, God took away the memories of the suffering and fear. This time you don’t have that luxury, so you’re going to feel vulnerable. It will pass with time.”
“Thanks, doctor,” Lila said, turning away from him and facing the wall, even if the movements took too much energy and caused too much pain.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice tired and broken. “I just don’t know what you want me to say?”
“Nothing. I want you to say nothing because you were less annoying when you were just sitting there feeling guilty. In fact, maybe you should leave?”
Lila didn’t want Roman to go. If he did leave though, she wanted someone else to stay with her. The dogs’ growling itched at her, racketing up her fear.
Roman didn’t leave though. He laid next to her quietly for what felt like forever before finding his voice again.
“I could have saved you that first time. Back when you went with Micah, that didn’t have to happen. I want to blame you, but I could have saved you, saved the whole pack, maybe even Micah.”
Saying nothing, Lila was fearful he might stop talking if she moved even an inch.
“Micah knew you were my mate and he used you as a way to force me to join his army. I knew he was manipulating me, but I went along with it because I wanted you. And that need for you made me too weak to force you to choose between me and Micah. I told myself you wouldn’t leave him if I asked, but that was a lie. The truth was I wanted to believe Micah could close the gateways and we could live as humans. I wanted to have you to myself in a safe life, so I didn’t force you to make a choice years ago that would have saved you.”
