Her breath caught at his words. “I never make the same mistake twice,” she finally said. She backed away, putting the screen door between herself and him. “Good night, Johnny.”
He nodded, turned and walked to his truck without a backward glance. Marissa slipped into the house, closed the front door and leaned heavily against it, surprised that after all this time, her heart was still capable of being hurt by Johnny.
Chapter 3
It had become customary for Marissa’s mother to pick up Benjamin from school on Friday and take him home with her.
At seven in the evening, Marissa closed the flower shop and her father closed his hardware store and Marissa drove her father home to the family ranch and picked up Benjamin. Most evenings they all ate dinner together before Marissa and Benjamin headed back to their house in town.
For most of the afternoon, Marissa had prayed that Benjamin would heed her wishes and not mention his father to her parents. She’d explained to him that it was important that her parents hear the news directly from her.
By the time she reached her parents house, she instantly knew Benjamin hadn’t said anything. Dinner was pleasant, with small talk and harmless town gossip accompanying the roast and potatoes.
After the pleasant meal, Benjamin went outside to play, and Marissa remained at the table with her parents, knowing she had to tell them the secret that she’d shared with only one other person.
Eugenia Sawyer poured her daughter another cup of coffee, then returned to her chair next to Marissa. “It’s obvious there’s something on your mind, dear,” she said as she exchanged a glance with her husband.
Marissa looked at her mom and dad and smiled. “You two know me too well.” Her smile faded and she took a sip of her coffee, unsure where to begin to unravel her lies of omission, lies that had begun ten years before. “We’ve never really talked about Benjamin’s father,” she finally said. “I know you both believe Brian Theron is his father, but he’s not.”
Jeffrey Sawyer frowned at his daughter. “What do you mean, he’s not? You were dating Brian... who else could it be?”
“Brian and I were never intimate, and after we broke up, I started seeing somebody else,” Marissa explained.
“Who? I don’t remember you dating anyone else,” Jeffrey said.
Marissa drew a deep breath, knowing the shock waves her confession would generate. “Johnny. Johnny Crockett,” she said softly. Jeffrey’s eyes widened and he fell back in his chair in stunned silence.
“We met the night of the Spring Festival and spent hours in his truck, talking and getting to know each other. Then we saw each other every night for the next month... until the morning he was arrested for Sydney Emery’s murder.”
Jeffrey still appeared shocked, but Eugenia nodded, seemingly unsurprised by Marissa’s confession. “I knew there was somebody and I knew it wasn’t Brian,” she said as she reached across the table to take Marissa’s hand in hers. “I suspected it might be Johnny. Millie Creighton called me one evening to tell me she thought she’d seen you with Johnny down by Miller’s Pond”
“Then why in the hell didn’t you tell me?” Jeffrey sputtered, looking first at his wife, then at Marissa. “Johnny Crockett—” he shook his head “—dear God. Does Benjamin know?”
Marissa nodded. “I told him yesterday, and last night Johnny came by to see him.”
“Is Benjamin okay with this?” Eugenia asked.
“Yes. He’s probably doing better than anyone else right now,” Marissa said.
Jeff stood and paced the floor next to the table. “Johnny Crockett,” he repeated the name with a shake of his head. He stopped his pacing and eyed Marissa with indignation. “Well, it’s obvious the man took advantage of you ten years ago. You were nothing but a kid.”
“Johnny is only a year older than me. He was just a kid, too, Dad.”
“He was man enough to be romancing two women and get himself convicted of killing one of them!” Jeffrey exclaimed, the words sending an arrow of pain through Marissa’s heart.
“Jeffrey, that’s enough,” Eugenia said and squeezed Marissa’s hand.
“That’s not enough,” Marissa’s father sputtered. “My God, the man is a convicted felon. He was not only having sex with Marissa, but he was arrested for murder and spent ten years in prison. There are folks in this town who never did like Johnny, people who believe he killed that girl and wish he’d never come back here.”
“You’re talking about the Emerys,” Marissa said “I can’t blame them for hating Johnny. They truly believe he killed Sydney, but he didn’t.”
“You know he’s innocent for a fact?” Jeffrey asked.
“No, but I know it in my heart,” Marissa stated emphatically.
“It doesn’t much matter what you know or feel. As far as the Emerys are concerned, Johnny Crockett is the devil incarnate and they’re going to use their money and influence for a major exorcism.”
“They can’t hurt him any more than he’s already been hurt,” Marissa replied.
“Don’t be too sure,” her father countered. “The Emerys wield a lot of power in Mustang, and Rachel Emery isn’t a woman to cross.”
“Johnny served time for the crime he was convicted of. There’s nothing the Emerys can do to make him leave here,” Marissa said.
Again Eugenia squeezed Marissa’s hand. “Your father and I don’t want to see you or Benjy in the middle of a feud with the Emerys.”
“That’s right,” Jeffrey agreed. “I have a feeling things are going to get ugly around here. The only reason why there hasn’t been any problems so far is because Brad Emery is out of town.”
“Surely Jesse will make certain there are no real problems,” Marissa said, indicating the present sheriff of Mustang.
“The problems the Emerys can make might be bigger than what the sheriff can handle,” Jeffrey said. He studied Marissa for a long moment. “You know we’ll help you fight if you want to have Johnny’s parental rights taken away. It might be the best thing for Benjamin.”
Marissa shook her head, knowing her father meant well, but not in the least interested in that particular solution. “What good will that do? Then Benjamin can grow up blaming me because he doesn’t have a relationship with his father.” She shook her head again. “No; that isn’t the answer. I won’t keep Johnny out of Benjamin’s life.”
Eugenia’s eyes were knowing as she gazed at Marissa. “I know how difficult it must be for you to see Johnny again.”
“I think I’ll go outside and find my grandson,” Jeffrey said, apparently assuming the two might need some time alone for woman talk. He left through the back door, leaving Marissa and her mother alone.
“He broke your heart, didn’t he?” Eugenia asked softly.
Marissa nodded and forced a small laugh. “I thought he loved me.” She sighed, remembering the first night she’d met Johnny. “He started out as my hero.”
Eugenia looked at her daughter curiously. “How so?”
Marissa leaned back in her chair, allowing her memory to take flight, carry her back to that time so long ago. “It was the night of the Spring Festival Dance. You probably remember, I went with Brian to the dance. We’d been bickering on and off for weeks. Brian had rented a motel room for the night of the dance, and I wasn’t interested in what he had in mind.” A blush warmed her cheeks.
“I never did like Brian,” Eugenia admitted. “The fact that he was the best quarterback in the county and was a relatively handsome young man didn’t impress me. And although he had good manners, I had the feeling it was just slick polish hiding a mean spirit.”
Marissa smiled, surprised at her mother’s astuteness. “Brian wasn’t really mean until he drank. And the night of the dance, he’d been drinking most of the evening.” Marissa’s smile faded as she remembered Brian becoming more surly and demanding as the night progressed.
“Around eleven, Brian decided it was time for us to go to the motel. I told him I didn’t want to
, that he could just take me home.” She paused a moment to sip her coffee. “Brian had decided it was time for us to become intimate He insisted that I was the only girl he knew who refused to go all the way. I stormed outside and he followed me. He backed me up against the building and was bullying and belittling me.”
She frowned, remembering Brian’s hot, boozy breath in her face, his hands pawing at her. He’d been like a man possessed, his single goal to force her to bend to his will.
“Johnny stepped out of the shadows.” She smiled. “So tall and strong He was like an avenging angel come to save me.” For a moment she allowed herself to fully fall back into the memory of that night.
“Brian, stop!” she exclaimed, trying to push him away. His legs were splayed and his hips pinned hers against the rough wood of the community building.
In all the months she’d been dating Brian, he’d never really frightened her. But he scared her now. His eyes gleamed with a wildness she’d never seen before and his attempt at seduction was not only clumsy, but simmered with suppressed brutality. His hands clenched her upper arms painfully tight as he kissed her neck, his boozy breath making her half-nauseous. “Brian, please stop!”
“Brian, please stop,” he mimicked, his lips a snarl of unpleasantness. “That’s what you always say. Stop. No. Don’t do that. I swear, Marissa, you’re the last virgin left in Mustang. Come to the motel with me, baby.”
“I told you I just want you to take me home, ” she said, tears springing to her eyes as he tightened his hold on her arms. She should have never come out here with him. She’d known he was drunk. She should have protested when he led her to the back of the building. “You’re hurting me,” she said.
“Don’t you know you hurt me every time you tell me no?” Brian released her arm and instead grabbed her breast, his fingers squeezing. “You’re a tease, Marissa. You promise, but never deliver. It’s time now for you to pay the piper.” His hips ground into hers.
“Let her go, Theron,” the deep voice thundered and both Brian and Marissa sought the source.
He stood nearby, his face half-hidden by shadows cast from the cowboy hat he wore. He wasn’t dressed for the dance. Instead of formal wear, he wore worn, tight jeans and a T-shirt that displayed his athletic build.
“Go away, Crockett. This isn’t any of your business,” Brian snarled.
Johnny Crockett. Marissa knew he was a year older than her. She’d seen him around town but had never spoken to him. She had always found him sinfully handsome but they ran in different social circles so their paths rarely crossed. She knew little about him other than he was poor and at the area rodeos he was a bull rider starting to make a name for himself.
“I’m making it my business,” Johnny said, his voice calm and controlled. “I’ve only been standing here a few minutes but I believe in that time the lady told you no several times.”
Brian released Marissa and turned to face Johnny.
“You want to make it your business? I’ll whip the hell out of you.” Brian took a step forward, threw a wild punch and fell to the ground in an alcohol stupor.
Johnny stepped over him to reach Marissa. “Are you all right?” he asked.
Marissa nodded and to her horror, tears sprang to her eyes. Now that the threat was gone, she realized she’d been terrified. Her tears came fast and furious, uncontrollable in their release.
“Hey, you’re okay,” Johnny said softly and brushed the tears gently from her cheeks.
Looking back, Marissa thought perhaps that was the moment she’d fallen in love with Johnny Crockett. She shook her head, pulling herself back from the past and to the present. “Johnny offered to drive me home. We left Brian lying on the ground, snoring in an alcoholic stupor. When we got in Johnny’s truck, I realized I wasn’t ready to come home yet. We ended up driving around for the next three hours, just talking and getting to know each other. Johnny and I saw each other every night after that. By the third or fourth time we went out, I felt like I’d known him forever. It’s hard to explain, but there was a connection between us.”
Eugenia smiled. “That’s not so hard to understand. I felt the same kind of thing the first time I went out with your father. I knew he was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.”
Marissa nodded. “That’s what I felt for Johnny. And I thought he felt the same for me. We shared dreams, hopes, made plans for the future. We had almost six weeks of dreams and hopes. He told me he loved me and I believed him. I believed him until the morning after the senior prom, when he was arrested, and I heard that Sydney Emery was dead and that Johnny had been seeing her, too.”
“So he was dating Sydney at the same time he was seeing you?”
“I guess so,” Marissa replied. Even after all these years, the knowledge sent a shaft of pain through her heart. “I never saw Johnny again after the morning of his arrest. By the time his trial was over, I realized I was pregnant and knowing he was probably going to prison, I thought the best thing I could do was put him behind me.” Marissa laughed without humor. “In all these years, I never thought about what I would do when Johnny finally got out of prison and came home.”
Eugenia smiled. “We rarely allow ourselves to consider the consequences of our actions.” She tilted her head and looked at her daughter curiously. “Do you still love him?”
“No,” Marissa replied quickly, vehemently. “I’m not even sure I like him.” She took a sip of her coffee, unwilling to tell her mother that although she was certain she didn’t love Johnny, there was still a physical attraction between them, a chemistry that was volatile.
She set her cup back in the saucer and returned her mother’s gaze. “He’s changed. He’s not the same man I knew before. He’s so angry and bitter.”
“If what you say is true, he served a lot of time for a crime he didn’t commit. That would make anyone angry,” Eugenia said. “Maybe Benjamin will help heal the scars Johnny now carries. Perhaps Benjamin can make Johnny remember who and what he was before Sydney Emery was found dead. I have a feeling Johnny needs Benjamin much more than Benjamin needs Johnny.”
The next morning her mother’s words echoed in Marissa’s head as she and Benjamin drove toward the Crockett ranch. Marissa couldn’t imagine the Johnny who had returned from prison needing anyone. He appeared hardened, his anger creating a shell around him that would keep him alone.
Johnny had been back in town for two days, and, as Marissa had expected, as news had gotten out about his return, the town buzzed with gossip and rumors.
All day yesterday, customers and friends had stopped by the store, serving up speculation about Johnny and what would happen when Brad Emery came back to town and heard his stepsister’s killer had returned to Mustang.
While Marissa drove slowly by the huge colonial mansion on the hill south of town, she thought of the family who lived within. The Emerys were the most prominent, wealthy people in half the state of Montana
Although Sydney had only been a year younger than Marissa, the two had never officially met. Sydney, along with her younger sister, Gillian, had been homeschooled. Their mother, Rachel, had allowed the girls little freedom to interact with the other young people in town. The only Emery who was highly visible in Mustang was Bradley Emery, Rachel’s stepson and Sydney and Gillian’s half brother.
It was Bradley who collected the rent on the businesses his family owned in town, Bradley who made frequent appearances at charity functions and town meetings.
In the years since Sydney’s death, now seventeen-year-old Gillian and her mother had simply become more reclusive than ever before. Bradley, now thirty-five, also spent more time at the family ranch and less time in town.
Marissa tightened her hands on the steering wheel as she passed an old, rusty shed. She was surprised to find the structure still standing. As the scene of Sydney’s murder, she would have assumed the Emerys had torn it down long ago.
The shed was halfway between the Emery mansion and Johnny
’s one-story ranch house. It was a lot more than the old shed that made the distinction between the two properties.
The Emery pasture was emerald green and covered with grazing cattle. The fields closer to the house were green with spring wheat and barley.
Crossing into Crockett territory, the landscape was less attractive. The fields lay barren and in the pastures where there was a good stand of grass, there was no livestock.
Johnny’s father had walked out on Johnny and his mom when Johnny was six, leaving his wife and son nothing but the ranch to sustain them. Johnny’s mother had done what she could to keep things going, but by the time Johnny was in high school, the Crocketts were Mustang’s poor.
At eighteen, Marissa hadn’t cared whether Johnny had a dollar in his pocket or a million dollar bills, she’d fallen head over heels in love with him from the moment he’d saved her from Brian’s lascivious advances.
“Mom?”
Benjamin’s voice pulled Marissa from her thoughts. “What, honey?” she asked as she turned down the lane that would take her to Johnny’s place.
“Do you think Dad was scared while he was in prison?”
“I don’t know, Benjy. You’ll have to ask him,” Marissa replied. She tried to imagine what prison time would be like for a man like Johnny, but it was impossible.
The young man Marissa had known was truly a cowboy at heart. Johnny had loved the outdoors, loved working the land. What little money he made riding bulls went directly back into the ranch.
How difficult it must have been for him, not to see the stars at night, feel the warmth of the sun on his face. How difficult to spend each waking hour in a tiny cell, never feeling the kiss of the wind, or smelling the scent of newly bloomed wildflowers.
All she really knew was that in his time of imprisonment, a daunting rage had been born, and there were times she felt that anger was pointed directly at her.
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