by Jillian Neal
“I can do it, just tell me where bowls are,” Aaron scoffed.
“There are some old mixing bowls in that cabinet. Do you want anything to drink?”
The twitch of his full lips shot another round of pure lust through her veins. She made herself a glass of water after he’d filled the bowls for Lulu and Buster. Mixing alcohol in with her current woozy condition couldn’t possibly be a good idea.
“You want my honest answer or a polite one?” His tone lowered to that throaty rasp she loved.
“I always want your honesty. I guess. Maybe.” My God, Natalie, make a fucking decision. Who are you?
“I honestly don’t want anything to drink because I don’t want any flavor in my mouth but yours.” He licked his lips driving home his point.
“I thought you said we weren’t…”
“We’re not. That sure as hell doesn’t mean I don’t want to know the flavors of your mouth and your skin though, sweetheart. There’s so much I want to know.”
Spurred on by curiosity and stubbornness, Natalie forced her feet to move forward. No more looking back. She was doing this. Resolve strengthened in her spine. “What else do you want to know?”
Another dark chuckle. He leaned back against her countertop, casually. Why did she have to be the only one who was nervous? “Still want honest?”
She nodded. “Yes. I always want honest.”
“You’re sure now?”
“I’m sure.”
“Good. Come here to me.” His darkening eyes drew her to him with just as much force as his hand taking hers and pulling her closer. “I’m about to be all kinds of ungentlemanly. Don’t tell your brother.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
“I want to know which way you lean your head when I’m hungry for your lips. I want to know what they taste like. I want to know how pink and swollen I can make them. Throwing all sense of politeness out for the moment, I can’t fucking wait to know the same things about your pussy lips as well. I want to know the kinds of sounds you’re going to make when I make you forget how to speak. And I will, honey, I will make you forget everything but my name and I’ll make you scream that.
“I want to know every square inch of your body. I want to know how tight and achy your nipples will get for me. I want to know the flavor of them as well. I want to know what your tits feel like swollen and full in my hands. I want to know precisely where I can touch you to keep you right on the edge of release. I want to know how long I can keep you there before you beg me to give you everything you need. I want to torture you in the most delectable ways. I swear you’ll like it. You’ll ask me for more. I want to know what your pussy looks like wrapped around my cock. I want to know how slick and milky I can make it. I want to see it covered in my cum. I want you to know how hard I get for you but how gentle I’ll be until I know you’re wanting more. And that’s just the beginning of all the things I’m going to discover about you. You okay with all of that?”
“Oh my God, yes.”
He’d given it his all. The long line of patience he’d been extending since the night before disintegrated into smoke with her greedy declaration that she wanted all of that as well. Forcing himself to enjoy this moment where she’d lost a little of her trepidation, he traced his thumbs over the hollows of her cheeks.
Her eyes fell to half-mast.
“I’m about to kiss you, baby. That okay?”
“Please.”
He caught the single word with his lips, trapping the consent between them. She wanted this. She needed this. Maybe not quite as badly as he did, but my God they both deserved a relationship that could heal them.
The confection of her lips melted against his. He brushed his tongue against her mouth, constantly seeking more, needing her to open to him and for him.
Her lips parted. His moan rang with his own victory. But she stiffened and drew back, before his tongue could begin a thorough exploration. Dammit all to hell.
He lifted his head. Before he could apologize, Buster leapt on his hind legs landing his paws on Natalie’s chest, attempting to thank her for the water she’d provided them.
“I love my dogs but they do not get to feel you up before I do. Get down, boy. Go sit.” Aaron pointed them to the living room.
Natalie laughed. Okay, so maybe he hadn’t screwed up too bad. “I’m sorry I got nervous. I just… I never…”
“Never what?”
Heat bloomed across her features adding to the arousal he’d brought to her cheeks.
“Just tell me, baby? Never be embarrassed with me.”
“That’s easier said than done.”
“Come on.”
Her gaze landed somewhere in the vicinity of the cabinet above his head. “I never know what to do with my hands.” She wrung her hands as if trying to rid her body of them. “I’m the only grown woman on this planet that doesn’t know how to kiss.”
Trying to temper his humor over her confusion, he winked at her. That always seemed to make her smile. If that wasn’t addictive as hell he didn’t know what was. “Trust me, you kiss like a dream. Drove me wild. Did the last time we did that, too. Just relax for me. Want me to do something with your hands? Then you won’t have to worry about them.”
“I guess that depends on what you do.”
“Let’s give it a try, okay?”
This time he only got a nod, but he’d take it. Guiding her to a wall between her kitchen and living room, he turned caging her between a rock and his hard place. “This good?”
Another nod. Improvising happened to be one of his specialties. He’d make do with whatever she was comfortable with. “Look at me, Nat. Be right here with me.” That was key. He had to remember that. No flashbacks for either of them.
Her eyes met his and he gathered her wrists gently in his hands. Her breaths disintegrated into shallow gasps. “I would never hurt you or make you do something you don’t want, baby. You know that.”
“I know. I just don’t know what you’re about to do.”
“I’m about to do this.” With his right hand he pressed her wrist against the wall over her head. He repeated the action with her left.
“Oh God,” she choked on a half-moan. Well, well, well, perhaps he’d just discovered a little something.
“Then I’m going to do this again.” He layered his greedy lips to hers, letting her flavors soak through him. Her chin moved against his beard and she allowed him in without prodding this time. Soft, open-mouthed, needy kisses. The perfect antidote to most anything in the world.
Her tongue filled his mouth. His baby was so hungry for him and still afraid to ask for what she needed. Innocence was penned in the flavors of her saliva.
The knowledge racked like hot, leaden weight in his balls. He memorized the wet heat and the hunger, the inexperience and the desire. Desperation shot through his veins. His muscles ached with need. She was his. He would be the only man who ever knew what she felt like when she came. What she felt like when her body squeezed and flexed around his cock.
When their teeth bumped, he lifted away from her, leaned the other way, and helped himself to another heady dose of Natalie.
She arched into him this time. Her denim trapped pussy moved instinctively against his groin. A low growl wrenched up from his gut. Fuck. If she kept that up he was going to come. It had been too damn long. He’d dreamed about this too fucking many times. He’d wanted her since the moment he saw her.
She ground with more vigor, so damn needy.
His groans were constant now. He had no more hope of keeping them contained than he did of making her stop.
She bucked again, spreading her legs more this time. The heat of her made him throb against her. This time it was her giving him a needy whimper for more.
His entire body drew taught. He released her hands. They traveled down his chest, nearing his now painful package. “Shit. Baby, stop.” He spoke the words while his own hands toyed with the end of her tank top. Skin. He just needed
to feel her soft skin in his hands. Needed to know where she most wanted his touch.
His face moved from her mouth to her neck. He inhaled the scent of her.
Glancing down at his jeans he was shocked they weren’t actually on fire. Unable to help himself, he traced his index finger along the low collar of her shirt. Her head fell back offering him more. “Tell me to stop, Nat. Jesus, just say it and I will. I swear.” His hand encapsulated her right breast. His mind willed her bra and shirt away.
Her gasp held no note of fear, only of need.
Her body knew how to ask for what she wanted, even if she couldn’t verbalize it. She thrust against him again, faster now.
Refusing to come in his jeans, something he hadn’t done since he was seventeen, he stepped back.
Her eyes flew open. “Why did you stop? Did I do something wrong?”
“I sure as hell didn’t want to stop, Nat, but I’m not doing this tonight. We’re taking our time. If we keep this up it’s all going to be over way too soon.” He tensed his jaw and tried to discreetly adjust himself. A mischievous grin spread across her face.
“I did that?” She pointed to the bulge against his zipper line.
“You did that.” He chuckled. “I’m strung so tight I may not be able to walk out to my truck.”
She gnawed on her lip for a moment, furrowing her brow.
“What? Just say it.”
“I really liked all of that. I’m sorry you can’t walk though.”
“My God, I’m an asshole.”
“Why do you think that?” Genuine confusion lit the golden flecks in her eyes.
“I wasn’t going to go that far. You’re just so sweet and I’m a greedy bastard.”
“I’m not sweet. I prefer to think of myself as a badass, thank you very much.”
“Oh yeah? Well you’re the most beautiful, innocent badass I’ve ever met.”
“You’re supposed to be helping me lose the innocent part.”
“And you’re one hundred percent sure you want me to do away with it all right now?” He knew the answer.
“Not one hundred percent, maybe.”
Keeping his eyes on hers he leaned in for one more quick kiss. “That’s what I thought. You sure you want to go with me tomorrow night?”
“I am sure about that. It’ll be fun. I don’t know much about your life before you got here. I’m excited to meet your family.”
“I’m not really related to any of them.”
“Blood isn’t necessary for family.”
Aaron knew in that moment if he wasn’t extremely careful he could end up falling head over army boots in love with Natalie Camden.
“I’ll pick you up around 4:00.”
“I’ll be ready.”
CHAPTER TEN
Feeling rather proud of herself as she parked her truck back by her house after Aaron had taken her to retrieve it, Natalie debated the ice cream in her freezer.
If she concentrated, she could still taste him on her lips. She didn’t want to lose his flavor. That was definitely the girliest thing you’ve ever thought. She wondered about this new side of herself. Being lovesick didn’t sound too appealing, but being into a guy was a normal thing for a woman to feel.
Bliss danced under her skin. She even seemed to have some kind of small flying creatures in her stomach, not something she’d ever experienced before. Luke was right. It was different this time. It was different because she refused to let what had happened with her uncle ruin this for her.
Power surged through her. She could leave it in the past now. She would leave it in the past. She’d taken the bull by the horns and hadn’t thought about those months when she was eleven for that entire kiss. Take that, Uncle Mick! Even thinking of his name shot bile to her throat. Nope. Not tonight. Nothing was going to ruin this night.
When her phone rang, she leapt across the sofa to answer it. Okay, so maybe she was just a little lovesick. She gave herself a pass. This was a guy she’d had a crush on since she’d first seen him in Saddlebacks. A man who knew all the things she needed to learn. And heaven help her if he wasn’t the sexiest thing she’d ever laid eyes on.
“Hello.” She remembered to actually answer the ringing phone in her hand.
“Hey, baby.”
The deep gravel of his voice sent the butterfly-like things in her stomach into overdrive. “Hey.” She inwardly mocked her own singsong voice.
“You okay?”
“Yeah. I’m really, really good.”
“I’m glad you are. I may need to spend all night in a cold shower.”
“Sorry about that.”
“Stop apologizing. I’m just teasing you.”
“I know. Can I tell you something?”
“You can tell me anything. I wish you’d tell me everything.”
“I wish you’d stop asking me about everything, but in a way this kind of has to do with that.”
“We’ll talk all night long if you want.”
Natalie knew he would. If she really wanted to rehash all of the confusion and shame, he’d listen and he wouldn’t judge. He’d do everything he could to help her understand, but that was the very last thing she wanted. Nothing was going to overshadow what they’d just shared. Even if it wasn’t mind-blowing sex, it would be someday. She just had one question about it all she wanted an answer to.
“I shouldn’t have liked that.” There. She’d said it.
“Shouldn’t have liked me kissing you?” Disappointment was laced in his response.
“No, the kissing was great. I’m supposed to like that and I did. The hand thing is what I shouldn’t have liked.”
He bound her hands. Sick fucking bastard. Aaron doubled down on his resolve to brutally tear whoever this sorry excuse for a human being was limb from bloody limb just before he put a bullet through his skull.
She was safe in her house alone and had questions about what they’d just done. His vengeance would have to wait for a few minutes anyway.
“Sweetheart, there are absolutely no rules about what you should or shouldn’t like. Never think there are. When it’s just you and me the things you’re curious about or the things that turn you on, they’re perfect, just like you are.”
“I’m not perfect.”
“By my estimations you are and we’re going to slowly explore all of the things that make my girl fly when she’s in my arms. I know it’s hard to do but try to leave all of those rules you’ve got in your head about what you should or shouldn’t want outside the bedroom door, okay?”
“I don’t know what I want exactly.”
“I keep telling you we’ll figure it out.”
“I have another question.” Her tone turned accusatory.
His mind immediately conjured up ways to get out of the inevitable question she was about to ask. “Shoot.”
“Who taught you the things you like?” And there it was. A blur of European and Middle Eastern sex clubs flashed through his mind. Prostitutes. Nameless, faceless women he’d had no business drowning his sorrows in joined the parade. He’d never deserve someone like Natalie. How had he ever thought he would?
“I have a lot of experience I wish I didn’t have. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” She sounded sincere.
“No, it’s not.”
“I figured you’d say something like that. I just wanted to know where you get all of your experience.”
“All over the fucking world, but, Nat, I swear what we’re doing, this means a lot to me. You mean a lot to me. I’ll do right by you. I was a stupid kid back then. I didn’t know what I was doing. I never knew how much I’d regret. You shouldn’t have given me another chance, and you did. I won’t do anything to fuck this up.”
“I’m really not upset you slept with other people. Still a little irked you kissed my sister once.”
“Thought we agreed never to talk about that again.”
Natalie laughed. “When did we agree to that?”
“T
hat time I begged you never to bring it back up. You know it was her idea.”
“You told me you were loopy on some kind of depression meds and that you’d just gotten to town.”
“I was but she caught me staring at you that night at the bar. She might’ve mentioned that you kind of liked me and that if I kissed her you’d likely take notice. That’s why I agreed.”
“Are you lying to me?”
“I swear, Nat. Ask Holly.”
“I don’t really care enough to do that. It’s just one of the things I try not to think about. I’m oddly glad you know how to teach me everything I’m missing out on. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
“That’s not really an option. You sure you’re good with everything. Want to ask me anything else?”
“Will you tell me about the guys we’re having dinner with tomorrow night? I don’t want to get off the phone yet.” How the hell is she even talking to me? How did I get this lucky?
Never fucking deserve her. Ever. “I told you we’ll talk all night if you want. Get in bed. I need to know you’re warm and safe then I’ll tell you about the Sevens.”
“Do you think someday I could sleep with you? You know, after we have sex or whatever?”
“I’m not a great sleeper but you can stay here anytime you want, sweetheart. I’ll hold you all night. We can do that before we have sex if you want. No rules, remember?”
“Why don’t you sleep?”
“Sleep is complicated.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The sun crept slowly over the fields, warming the grazing cattle and the cool Nebraskan dirt, as Natalie stomped through the wet grass to her sister’s house early the next morning.
She’d already fed and watered the horses. She’d go check her cattle after she talked to Dec. Pounding on the door, she prayed her sister wasn’t currently tied to the bed or anything. Dec and Holly were into some pretty kinky stuff.
Envisioning herself tied to a bed with Aaron over her swirled excitement through her limbs. Guilt over her own curiosity rushed the feeling away a moment later.
