by Karen Deen
“No, Luke. Be nice! I haven’t been to the toilet, yet. You don’t want a wet bed, do you? You know what happens if you touch me there.” His eyes lit up.
“So, what are you going to bribe me with? What will I get if I don’t tickle you?”
“Well, firstly, you get a dry bed.” We both laughed while I tried wriggling free from his strong hold. I gazed up at him. “Secondly, I will trade positions with you. Then we can wait and see what arises.”
“I know exactly what will be rising and so do you. There’s no way I can lay here with you sitting on top of me naked and not be wanting to be inside you. Just like I do right now.” Leaning down, he whispered, “Come to think of it, I want to be inside you all the time. Just like now. Is that what you want, baby? Me, inside that wet pussy of yours?” He went from being the funny Luke, to hot and seductive. I could never say no.
My breath hitched at the mere thought of pleasure. “You make me feel so good. I will always want you.”
“This time, you don’t get the slow, loving sex. I want to fuck you, hard, hearing you screaming my name, over and over. Brace yourself, baby, I’m about to rock your world.” His grin lit up his face. This was a moment I would remember. My memory treasure box in my head was starting to fill up. For years, there were only a few things I would store there. Things that no one could ever take away from me. Since meeting Luke, my box was overflowing with treasured moments. Some sweet, some so damn hot they were X-rated, never for public sharing. This particular morning was going to be one of those moments.
“Take me hard, remind me who I belong to.” That was what I wanted. I couldn’t just know it, I needed to feel it. I knew it was because of my childhood, but I was always going to be needy. Somehow, I couldn’t imagine that being a problem with Luke. If he could, he would’ve already made sure the world knew I was his.
“Be careful what you agree to, you may regret it.” The fire in his eyes told me I’d better hold on for the ride. This is going to be intense, just how I wanted it.
***
Waking up from an exhausting night only to continue playing around in the morning had us both super hungry. Showered and dressed, I found Luke scowling into my fridge.
“What were you expecting? While you were gone the food fairies would pay me a visit and load up with all your favourites? I didn’t think you would be home until today, so I was going to shop later. By the way, why did you come home last night?”
“I’d think that’s obvious. I hate being away from you.” He turned and looked to me. “Call me a weirdo, but I had a strange feeling you needed me. I don’t know why, I don’t know how, I just felt your pull. I knew I needed to come home. I couldn’t have known what would happen or how badly you needed me. But you going to a bar, with the girls, no men, just didn’t sit right with me. Call me whatever you like, I don’t care. I want to protect you. Always.”
He could be the biggest joker and then the sweetest man. I didn’t think anyone else had ever really seen this sweet side. He was too busy being a pain in the ass.
“I want to yell at you and say don’t be so controlling, but I can’t. Because you have no idea how it feels to have you care so much and know that you will protect me. I’ve been watching the way Zach is with Emily. That has always been my dream. I know deep down that’s who you are, too. My protector. You’d come home anytime to save me. Just next time, could you time your entrance a little earlier, before I have a stupid meltdown again?” I tried to laugh it off but Luke stopped me.
“Breakfast first, then we talk. We have so much to work out. I can’t think clearly yet because some crazy woman wore me out. I need food, coffee, and then I might be able to function. Get your sweet ass in my car because we’re going to my place. The fridge is stocked and you love my kitchen. Well, let’s say you love what I do to you in my kitchen.”
“God, you are a cocky bastard. Breakfast first, remember. Nothing else. Just food!” Grabbing my keys and bag off the bench, I squealed when a swat landed on my ass.
“You women tell me you can all multi-task. News flash, baby. Men can, too. I’m willing to show you how I can feed you and fuck you all at the same time. Challenge accepted?”
“Oh, my Lord, you kill me. Are you sure you can fit your head through the door?” I walked through the front door only to hear his reply.
“Which one, both my heads are pretty huge.”
“Luke!”
“Give up, kitten.
Luke
Zoe fed me breakfast, twice. Two different varieties, should we say. I told her she loved my kitchen. I did too. The benches were huge and just the right height.
We talked, talked some more, and then talked some more, again. We’d been needing to lay all the cards on the table for a long time. I was all talked out. No matter what or how I said it, Zoe was standing firm. She was not ready to tell anyone about us, yet. It was killing me, but I respected her wishes. She needed to be one-hundred-fifty percent certain of us to be able to tell my family. Well, mainly Grant. She feared he would sack her. There was no way in this world I would let that happen. I wished she trusted me enough to handle it. Small steps. At least she agreed to talking with Dr. Fordosa together, and then on my own. I had so much respect for my girl. I was lucky and never had any real worries in my life. Yet, she battled against some awful abuse. She managed to get help and was not ashamed to tell me about that help and continued to use it when needed. To me, that was amazing and she was far stronger than she gave herself credit for. Proud was an understatement. I just wished she’d see it.
27
Three months later
Luke
I FEEL LIKE I WAS LIVING TWO LIVES.
My work life. Luke, the single brother. The funny guy. The ladies’ man, apparently. Not that anyone would have seen me with any lady in over a year, but they just assumed from my past habits. It was hard when being out as a group, Zoe sitting across the table, or if I was really lucky, her sitting next to me. I couldn’t help it, I had to touch her. My hands didn’t know how to stay where they were supposed to. A few times at the bar for drinks, straight from the office, she sat next to me, wearing her short skirt which she wore to flirt with me. That very skirt led to my wandering hands and to that place that made her shiver and squirm. It was fun watching her biting her lip, crossing her legs and trying to push me away without anyone noticing. Sometimes it was just too much. Excusing herself for the bathroom I was right behind her, finding the nearest place I could make her mine once more. Where I could swallow her moans with a frantic kiss as I relieved her pressure. I was unsure what was harder on my blue balls. The time before we got together where I couldn’t touch Zoe at all, or now, where she was mine but I couldn’t touch her when I wanted to. Every day at the office, I found myself adjusting my cock whenever she walked past. Some days were just pure hell and she wondered why I devoured her as we stumbled through the door at home.
Then there was Luke, boyfriend of Zoe, and trapped in our amazing little bubble. Our time together was how I imagined life would be once I found the girl who was meant for me. We talked, we laughed, and most of all, we loved, a lot. It was complicated and took planning but we managed. Twelve months of hiding was enough. I needed to tell everyone. My family was going to be devastated that I kept this to myself. They would understand once they know why. They loved Zoe like she was already part of the family. Nothing would change.
The buzzer at the front gate aroused me from my thoughts. I knew it wasn’t Zoe because she was out shopping with the girls. Since little baby Thomas was born, that was what they all did. Zach and Emily wouldn’t need to buy a thing for him. Between the girls and my mother, he was spoiled rotten. Checking the security camera, I was surprised to see my dad’s truck at the gate. Buzzing him in, I quickly glanced around to make sure none of Zoe’s shit was left downstairs. I loved that she felt at home, but she had learned to spread herself out.
“Hey, Dad. How are you? I’m surprised to see you.” Before I could g
et any more words out, the back passenger door swung open.
“Uncle Luke, look what Gruffy got for me. We’ve been having man time because the girls are shopping which is so boring, with a capital B. We’ve been learning how to ride this.” His eyes lit up with a big sparkle as he pulled his new skateboard from the truck to show me. “Gruffy said you were the best person to teach me. He said you used to fall off all the time like me but then you got really good. Can you? Can you, please? I want to get really good, like Sophia is at dancing.”
“Whoa, buddy, slow down. One day you will learn how to just say hello, take a breath and then wait for an answer. I’m guessing that won’t happen any time soon, hey, little man?” I ruffled the top of his head, giving him our little fist pump, hand-slap greeting we’d made up. Nobody else could do it. Just me and my little man, Sammy.
Dad leaned in to give me the three-back-slap man hug. “Hi, son. Sorry for arriving without notice. Just need a breather, if you know what I mean? All I can say is, that brother of yours has his hands full here. Let’s hope Thomas is a bit quieter and more like his sister.” We both laughed together as we followed Sammy inside. He was already sitting up at the bench waiting for a treat. He knew me too well. I always had chocolate here for him and his sister, or sweets. Either way, there was always something.
“What are you waiting for, Sammy? Would you like some fruit to eat, or vegetables? I know how much you love them.” Dad tried to hold his laughter.
“Blahhh, yuck no! You are so silly, Uncle Luke. I’ve been good all day, well nearly all day, haven’t I, Gruffy?” His pleading eyes looked to his grandfather for help.
“Hmmm, let me think about that?” Dad scratched his chin while poor Sammy nearly died with anticipation. He was bouncing on the seat. We all knew it was impossible for him to sit still for very long. “Yeah, Luke, I reckon he has been pretty good today.”
With that, he was down from the stool, across the floor and into the pantry, climbing up the step ladder to look for the treat jar. I could hear him talking to himself, choosing which chocolate he would take. Then there was silence.
“Uncle Luke, what are those on the pantry floor?” The look on my dad’s face told me I didn’t want to turn around. “They look a bit like the pants that mommy seems to lose around our house in funny places, too.”
Fuck.
They were Zoe’s from this morning. She was being cheeky when she tried to slingshot them at me across the kitchen to get my attention that she wasn’t wearing any pants. Holy shit, how did I explain this?
“I bet they are my mom’s. She probably lost a pair here when she visited. Silly Mommy. She needs to learn how to keep her pants on and not lose them all the time.” I couldn’t deal anymore, I had to get out.
I tried so hard to hold it in, I escaped down the hall mumbling about needing the bathroom. I hadn’t laughed so hard that I cried for a long while. That kid got me every time. Thank God he came up with his own story. Although, I was certain Dad would be ready to give me a ribbing when I returned to the kitchen. Zach also might need an explanation when Samuel headed home with a story about Emily’s black lace panties being in my pantry.
Pulling myself together, it was time to face the music.
“Right, let’s get this skateboard lesson underway, shall we?” That was enough to distract my little mate. He was off out the front door to get his helmet and safety pads on.
“Son, you need to give Zoe back her panties when you’re finished playing. Or, if you intend on keeping them, perhaps in your bedroom is a better option than the pantry.” His deep rumbling laugh spilled out of him as he walked past and slapped me on the shoulder. What the hell? How did he know they were Zoe’s?
Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck!
Zoe was going to lose her shit if she found out Dad knew. And who else? Oh, man, this was going to be a major drama for Zoe.
I didn’t have time to digest what was going on because Sammy was on me as soon as I walked out the front door. My house was the perfect place for him to learn. My long, flat concrete drive gave him space with no obstacles to dodge. After spending ten minutes with him, he’d mastered the balance which was the major skill. Now, it was practice, then gaining confidence.
Dad and I sat on the edge of the porch watching him using such intense concentration. That little boy was the most adorable thing I’d ever seen, besides his brother and sister.
Dad was the first to break the silence and addressed the elephant in the room. I was happy to keep avoiding it as long as possible.
“You don’t have to worry, Luke. Your secret is safe with me and your mother.” Crap, if Mom knew, then so would everyone.
“How did you know?”
“I might be old, but I’m not stupid. You love that girl with your whole soul. I see it every time you look at her. The beautiful thing is, she looks at you the same way.”
“I’m sorry we haven’t told you. It’s complicated.”
“Luke, we know there is a reason. We also know Zoe had a hard life before she turned up at Stevenson Developments. We don’t know what happened, obviously, but we knew she was damaged. Your mother knew it the first time she saw her. Why do you think she took her under her wing as one of her own? That woman could have given birth to twenty kids and there still wouldn’t be enough people for her to mother. Hence, why she needs grandkids and lots of them. She has so much love to give, she’s bursting at the seams. When you kids’ all started to grow up and leave home, she was lost. I was so busy working and providing for you all, I didn’t see it at first. It was gradual but finally I woke up and saw what was happening right in front of my eyes. That was why I decided it was time to retire and take her travelling. She needed the distraction. If there is one piece of advice I can give you about women. They need to be loved and be able to give love back. It feeds their soul, keeps their internal spark alive.”
No truer words had ever been spoken about Zoe.
“Dad, you have no idea. Her life growing up was so sad. Until the day I told her I loved her, no one had ever said those words to her. Not one parent, not one friend or boyfriend. Not one single person saw a little girl who just needed someone to love and care for her.” Finally, I could talk to someone about how I felt. How my heart felt like it was going to burst out of my chest and the anger over how she had been treated. It was like a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders.
“I can’t tell you what happened to her. That’s her story. I doubt she would ever tell you, but that’s okay. Just know that you and Mom are the only parents she has ever or will ever have. Thank you for loving her like you do, even though she is not one of us.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Luke. The moment she walked into that office, she hooked your heart and at that moment she became one of us. You kids all took your time finding love, now you three boys all have women who are leading you around by your balls. Welcome to my world.” We both chuckled, giving Sammy the thumbs up to let him know we were still watching. “Grant hasn’t yet admitted it to himself. You’ve taken the leap, just not able to share the story with everyone, and Zach, well, he’s already signed, sealed and delivered.” We both laughed out loud. My dad didn’t always have a lot to say, so when he talked, you listened.
“I want to share it all. I want to shout it to the world that I have this amazing woman that I love with every piece of my heart and soul. It has taken Zoe this long to work through her feelings and learn how to accept my love. When you grow up in a world where love is felt and spoken every day, it’s easy to accept. Love to Zoe is a foreign concept. Although she has longed for it for such a huge part of her life, when it finally arrived in the form of me, it was hugely overwhelming. We’ve needed this time to work through it and get her settled. She has always lived a life waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under her. Telling the family and Grant is her last hurdle. I think we’re almost there, but it’s not my call to make. I know Grant and the family always see me as the idiot of the family, but I have n
ever been more serious and committed in my life than I am with Zoe. She’s it for me, Dad. I will die before I let her hurt again like she has previously lived through.”
My heart pounded in my chest, palms sweating. I’d never told anyone how I felt. It was hard and scary.
“That, my boy, is what we call forever love. Grab it with both hands and never let it go. Not only have you found Zoe who is the love of your life, you have finally found your inner man. The one I knew was hiding in there. You were lost for a little while not knowing where you fit in life. Being funny helped you cover that up. But I saw right through that. I am so proud of you, Luke. You have grown into a man that knows who and what is important in life. Now, it’s time to just get on with living. When your gorgeous girl is ready, she will share her happiness. Until then, don’t push her. It sounds like she has come a long way. There will be a right time but only she can decide that with you standing by her side. There are times in all our lives when things are hard. Harder for some, than others. The bravest thing we can do, is put our hand up and ask for help. It happened to your mom once. It’s a story for another day but know that she let her guard down for once, and let me, along with others, help her. I know it sounds hard to believe. It took time, but she came back stronger than ever. Zoe is the same. She is strong like your mom and I have no doubt she will beat this and live a very long, loving life with you. Just remember, she will always be partly fragile. Nurture that, but never stifle and stop her from growing. She needs to feed her own strength and love but know that you are always beside her, supporting.” By now, I was leaning against my dad’s shoulder with his arm around me, my head resting on him. I hadn’t been in this position since I was a kid. It felt good.
