I’d never realized how much I had with Patrick until it was gone. Though I didn’t miss Patrick, I did miss the status, the ability to just sign for something we needed and take it. Today, while I did the work of preparing tonight’s mini-feast, I’d decided that as much as I didn’t feel ready for another mate, the way things were now was no life for the pups, and I was going to have to be an adult. I’d do my best to be agreeable to this new pack member, and maybe once he settled here, things would progress. I told myself that it would be different this time, that he had a choice to take me or leave me, and if he took me—that meant something good, right? Maybe he would like a mate that kept his house organized, kept track of his appointments, ran things like clockwork. I couldn’t cook, and I couldn’t sew, or knit, or anything like that, but any system I got my hands on ran exactly how I wanted it.
Like tonight. The food was a stumbling block, but I’d left enough time to remake anything I screwed up, and everything else had gone perfectly. No one had been late, everyone was dressed properly, and the entire crew played their parts perfectly. I never quite understood how things happened like that, but I was too busy right now to bother worrying about it. If I managed it, this mating would give my pups a better future than they had right now.
My focus had drifted away from the conversation, but it snapped right back when I heard the word, “Pups.”
Roland finished his sentence. “He’s definitely fertile, and Patrick used to say his heats were strong. You’ll have to take a vacation each fall.” There was a burst of lascivious laughter, and I flushed. Yes, my heats were strong. It didn’t make me a bad person. And Patrick had liked it. If I had to be humiliated once a year by irrational behavior, I hoped that the new shifter would like it too.
Then this new shifter, my best hope, said something that chilled me to the core.
“I appreciate that, but I’m not sure I’m at a point either in my life or my career to take on responsibility for another man’s pups. He’s gorgeous, and I would gladly take him—I’ve dealt with omegas before in my practice and I couldn’t imagine mating anything other. But not the pups.”
Miranda’s voice slithered into the conversation. “I’m certain something can be done about that. We’re pack, after all. Someone will take them in.”
I slid down the wall, both hands over my mouth to hold back a scream of rage and fear, while they calmly discussed who could be bullied into taking on my pups.
No, no, no, no, no, no. Never. I’d never go to him, no matter how much he promised me. Not if I had to give up my pups. I’d grown up with abandoned pups in Buffalo Gap. I’d seen what their lives would be like first hand—the bullying, the neglect. In some ways, it was worse than being omega, and I didn’t want that for my babies. And, oh, poor Noah. I’d hidden his condition so far, but if he went to another family…
I wanted to kill them.
No, stupid idea. That would for sure lose me my pups.
There was only one more course to serve, and then I could start my clean-up. I always did my best thinking while my hands were busy, so I started arranging tiny cheesecakes on one of my—no, Roland’s. I had to remember that. Roland’s best plates. Once they were all in place, and I’d carefully cleaned away the crumbs that had fallen from the crusts, I picked it up, forced my face into pleasant lines, and headed into the living room.
The alcohol had taken its toll, or its effect. I didn’t particularly care. Flushed faces abounded, except for the new shifter, who I regarded with suspicion from behind my perfect omega’s smile. The laughter was loud, and it grated on my ears. I offered the tiny cakes around, then picked up the empty platter from the mushrooms and put them in its place. Some of the glasses were empty, so I filled them, wishing bitterly that they’d get so drunk they’d do or say something that would ruin the whole deal.
Salvadoro put a casual hand on my hip, drunk enough that he’d forgotten his mate seated on the other side of the room. I stepped to the side and ignored him, but I caught a glimpse of his mate, and knew I would be in for a long, hard winter.
Assuming I didn’t mate the doctor.
Grimly, I finished filling glasses and picked up some dirtied cloth napkins, switching them out for clean ones from the side board. I piled everything on the platter and eased myself out of notice.
Finally, I could escape back to my kitchen, check on the pups, and start the end of my long day. The strain and effort had taken their toll, and my body felt forty pounds heavier as I left the conspirators behind me.
My pups were content in the porch. Fan and Teca had fallen asleep, curled up under a blanket on my layer of foam. I gathered up the empty cookie bag and checked on Noah and Beatrice. Beatrice was asleep as well, but Noah was wide awake, watching me with more intelligence than any five-month-old had any right to have.
“How’s my little boy?” I cooed and picked him up. If I had to, I could finish cleaning with him in the sling, though it was harder to reach the sink. Then again, I’d had plenty of practice reaching around a baby. I propped him on my shoulder and grabbed the sling before I went back to the kitchen.
Sebastian stood in the open arch between the kitchen and the living room, watching me quizzically. I froze, holding my baby protectively to my chest. Noah squirmed and twisted his head. I suppose he felt the sudden tension in my body. Desperately, I rubbed his back with my thumb, in case he decided to cry.
“The food was good,” Sebastian said. He took a step, and reached out to touch Noah. “He seems healthy.”
I nodded automatically. “He is. They all are,” I said through lips gone suddenly numb. What did he want?
“You seem healthy as well.” His hand moved from Noah’s head to my jaw, his thumb playing over my chin, then moving up to stroke along my lips, prodding until I couldn’t do anything but open them and let him in.
We stood there, me frozen in a myriad of emotions, him calmly evaluating me as if I was an animal he wanted to purchase. Gauging my worth, my training, my obedience. And here I was, with the perfect opportunity to prove I was unsuitable, and all I could do was stand there and let him manhandle me.
He took a step closer, trapping me between the frame of the door and his body. I trembled, knowing what was coming, powerless in the moment to stop it. Then his lips met mine and he kissed me, the way an alpha kisses, conquering what was his. I stood quiet, compliant, and—if I were to be honest—scared. If he wanted me, he could take me right now, and sign the papers to mate me as soon as he decided that my bedroom skills suited him. I worried about Noah, knowing this man didn’t want him. Would he be careless of him, take him roughly from my arms and drop him as something of no value?
His kiss deepened. It was cruel, but to me it was very obvious that he was testing to see where I would break. My lower lip pressed against one of my canines, a sharp point of pain barely noticed in my emotional turmoil.
Then he stepped back and nodded. “I think you and I will do very well together. It’ll be spring before I can move. In the meantime, Roland will want to know what furnishings will be needed. Make a list. I want everything ready when I come back.” He spun on his heel and sauntered back to the living room. A moment later, I heard the congratulatory hum of voices from the living room.
I snuggled Noah close. The kitchen was still a mess, but I was tempted to just leave it and go to bed to cry myself to sleep. That would make more trouble for me than it was worth, though, so I rolled up my sleeves and tucked Noah into his sling.
Besides, there was lots to keep my hands busy.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The morning of the second day after Sebastian’s visit, I put my travel permits down in front of Roland for his signature.
“What’s this?” he asked, his eyes narrowing as he read down my stated itinerary.
“My cousin Jason just had a pup in Mercy Hills. I’d like to go visit him, before things get really busy here. He hasn’t seen my pups,” I paused here, and put as much quiet despair in my voice as possible
. “It might be his only chance.”
“I didn’t know you two were related,” he said, and gave me a considering once over.
“On my mother’s side. He disappeared when he was thirteen, and I just found out he’s back.” I was using him ruthlessly, but I hoped that any omega desperate enough to run from his pack for six years wouldn’t mind being used this way.
Roland glanced down at my permit. “Mercy Hills, eh?”
I nodded. “He might be able to help with the pups.”
They’d broken the news to me the day after the visit. I’d played my part, begged and sobbed and acted like I hadn’t already decided that the only way I’d touch that shifter was with a ten foot pole with a cattle prod on the end of it. They’d been firm and sent me to my porch to collect myself.
Later, I’d tracked Roland down to plead some more, and when he’d refused to budge, I’d reluctantly laid a list of families who would make good foster parents in front of him, as if I’d been entirely defeated.
Never stand between an omega and their pups.
He frowned, and I could see him considering the potential benefits of encouraging my ‘relationship’ with a member of Mercy Hills. “Very well.” He scribbled his name on the line at the bottom, granting me permission for a one week’s stay with my ‘cousin’, then paused, squinting at the dates I’d written. “Do you want to pass the full moon with them?”
“It would be nice.” Two weeks would give me plenty of time to plead my case in Mercy Hills and, if that didn’t work, to make a plan to do what Jason had done—hide in the human world. I didn’t know how he’d done it, but I could probably tease the information out of him. Surely he’d be willing to help another omega being forced into an unwanted mating, especially now that he had a pup of his own. He’d have to feel it in his gut how impossible giving them up was.
Roland changed my return date to give me another two days past full moon and initialed it. I felt a momentary pang of guilt for deceiving him, made worse when he scratched out my name and added his to the section indicating what account to debit for the vehicle use, preserving my last few credits. My plan had included sneaking food out of the kitchen here, because the use of the pack’s van would empty my account completely. Another twinge of guilt shot through me, which I fiercely repressed in the face of what he and the pack had planned for me.
“Thank you, sir.” I picked up the piece of paper with hands that only trembled slightly. It took all my strength not to run out of his office, but I managed it, at least until I was out of Roland’s view. Then I raced full tilt down to Central to arrange for the van, and back home to hurry my children into what I hoped would be a better future.
I blew the last of my pack credit on treats for the pups, since I didn’t have to use them for the van anymore. Fresh apples, berries imported from human territory, little packages of dark cookies filled with sweet white icing, slightly stale because of how expensive they were. Fan and I shared a huge bag of barbecue potato chips—luckily Noah didn’t seem to mind any barbecue flavor in my milk when it came time to nurse him.
The normally six-hour drive took me eight, with bathroom breaks and stops to clean up messy pups. I didn’t care. I was free, at least for now, and my undefined future shone in front of me like a full moon in summer, bright and hopeful. I stopped once more as the sun set, underneath the sign for the exit to the Mercy Hills Shifter Enclave, and dragged all my babies out for a last pee before we got to the gates.
My own bladder was feeling a little nervous—everything depended on Jason going along with my deception. I hadn’t been able to find a way to contact him, so I was banking on the tendency of shifters to side with each other in any situation involving humans and sort out the details later. I just hoped he was quick enough to follow my lead, though if he’d stayed out of the hands an Alpha who’d been actively hunting him, he had to be pretty bright.
“All right, darlings, time to go. We’re almost there.” Fan climbed into his car seat all by himself while I got everyone else into their seats and buckled in. He fumbled the straps into place on his own, but was still struggling with the buckles when I got to him.
“Let me do that for you.”
“No! I’ll do it.”
You’re such an alpha. But for once, the thought didn’t bother me. He’d been so good during this trip, like just getting away from Jackson-Jellystone had turned him into a whole new pup. It gave me hope. “How about if I hold one side for you, and you click the other one in.” That worked, and only moments later we were on the road leading to Mercy Hills.
I slowed down as we got close to the gate, my headlights skating across the heavy concrete walls and the rolling iron bars. One of the officers stepped out onto the road, and I stopped beside him. My papers were ready on the passenger seat, and I touched my collar tabs as if to reassure myself that I was there on legitimate business.
“Can I help you?” the human said. He peered into the back of the van and raised his eyebrows at my crowd of pups.
“I’m here to visit my cousin, Jason.” I prayed the lie would hold.
“Papers,” he said, and held out his hand, though his eyes never strayed from my pups. “These all yours?”
“Yes,” I answered, handing out my travel permit. “They’re too young for tabs yet.”
He read through the page listing our ages and physical descriptions, and I could tell when he’d done the math on when my first pup was born, because he sucked in a breath between his teeth and gave me a funny look. “All right. You know where you’re going?”
I shook my head. That was the one real weakness in my plan. Well, that, and the possibility that Jason might out me anyway, though I thought shifter solidarity would hold up. It had to.
The officer nodded and handed me back my papers. “I’ll call one of their security team down once we’ve searched your vehicle. He can tell you where to go.”
“Thank you.” And I really did mean it. He’d just solved one of my worries, and did it without blinking an eye.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Abel stretched his legs out and leaned back on Mac and Jason’s couch. Macy slept on his chest, a warm comfortable lump that made him disinclined to move, ever. He canted his head down to take a peek at her peaceful and absolute sleep, and wondered what it would be like to have his own. If he could ever rearrange his life well enough to make space for one. Or two.
Watching Mac and Jason make a go of their unlikely mating made him wish he could have the same chance. Of course, he’d have to find someone to take over half of his workload. Even tonight’s stolen moments of ease would have to be paid for tomorrow, but they were all worth it.
Macy smacked her lips and rubbed her nose, then fell back into boneless slumber.
“I made brownies,” Jason said, leaning over the back of the couch to gently brush Macy’s pale hair back.
“I think I’m trapped,” Abel told him.
Mac sat beside him and handed him a plate with a single brownie in the center. “That’s how they get you. The greatest hunters of our species aren’t the Alphas, they’re the babies.”
“Well, she’s caught me.” He set his plate on his thigh—not the bruised one--and picked up the brownie, his mouth already watering in anticipation. They were at the end of their harvest cycle, and everyone was producing good food, but Jason could make canned tuna and macaroni taste amazing. He always shrugged it off as a result of being on the run for six years, but Abel thought there was some real talent there, if he could figure out how to get Jason to tap into it. And it might be a way for Jason to help pay into his mating-price, since he and Mac seemed so determined. He bit into the brownie, and closed his eyes in appreciation. “Holy shit, Jason, I should have mated you when I had the chance.”
Jason poked his head out of the kitchen. “You snooze, you lose, oh great and wise Alpha.”
Mac simply sat at his end of the couch, happily enjoying his brownie.
Abel poked him in the shoulder. “
No comment?”
Mac shook his head. “Ouch. Easy on the bruises. And nope. I know he’s mine.” He grinned up at his mate as Jason came back into the room, and pulled Jason down onto his lap as the omega tried to scoot by to check on the baby. “She’s fine. Look, see how happy she is with Uncle Abel.”
Abel laughed. “Don’t confuse the poor girl. We’re second cousins at most.” He turned his gaze back to the baby again. She really was adorable.
“Let me know if you get tired of holding her,” Jason said.
“I will.” Hardly. He liked pups, just didn’t have any time for them.
The buzzing of a phone filled the room.
Mac jumped. “That’s me.” Jason started to get off his lap, but Mac wrapped his arm around Jason’s waist, holding him in place.
“You’ll never get your phone that way,” Jason said, but he was laughing.
“Watch me.” Mac squirmed, trying to force his hand into his pocket. Or at least, that what Abel thought he was doing, until Jason squawked and slapped him.
“Behave. Fine example you’re setting for Macy.” But Jason didn’t look particularly offended.
“I hope she has someone of her own to grab someday. Maybe we’ll share pointers.” He pulled out the phone and checked the screen. “Duke. Wonder what’s going on?” He let Jason slip off his lap and thumbed the screen to return the call.
Reluctantly, Abel gave the baby back to his bearer and listened in on Mac’s side of the conversation. “Who? No, he’s never mentioned one.” He tilted the phone away from his mouth. “Jason, do you have family in Mississippi?”
“Not that I know of.” Jason bobbed slowly in place, the baby cradled under his chin. “Unless someone got married there since we ran away. What’s their name?”
Abel's Omega(Gay Paranomal MM Mpreg Romance) (Mercy Hills Pack Book 2) Page 5
