She laughed and nodded to her neighbour, Tanya.
‘I’m Tanya. I’m trans.’
I was surprised and it must have showed.
‘Yes, dear,’ she said with a suppressed sigh. ‘I know I look so feminine. I’m often told. I work for a charity, and I’m a switch. Like Maria, I can swing both ways, but I have to find the person attractive.’
‘Ryan,’ said Katie’s bloke. ‘I’m a mechanic, if that matters. I’m a top, looking for an exclusive relationship, but currently making the most of having a few subs to play with.’
‘I’m Katie,’ said Katie. ‘I’m submissive, and very busy with my career at the moment, which means I only really have time for more casual arrangements. But it’s fun, so I’m not complaining.’
‘I’m Joel,’ said Biblical Beard. ‘I’m a college lecturer, so I have to keep my head down a bit as far as the scene’s concerned. My lovely wife Rachel wishes she could be here today, but the kids are performing at a music festival, so she sends her apologies. We’re exclusive, obviously, but we like to get together with like-minded souls now and again for a bit of specialist chat and advice.’
‘I’m Louise,’ said a thirtysomething woman in a leopard-print jacket beside him. ‘I fantasised about spanking for years, but couldn’t get a boyfriend interested. Then I got a job at Wanton Woman, and started to hear about groups like this on the grapevine. I’m the manageress there now. I give mates’ rates on fetish gear and toys, if either of you fancies popping in some time.’
‘Cool,’ I said. I’d never set foot in Wanton Woman, because it was in a fairly seedy part of town, but I’d stared into its window more than a few times when my bus was stuck in traffic.
‘Tim,’ said the man who’d eyed me up earlier. ‘I work in a call centre, for my sins, which are many. I have switched in the past, but I tend to prefer to top. I haven’t been doing this long – I’m the newest here apart from you two, and it’s been about a year now. I’m a fast learner, though.’ He winked at me, and I looked hurriedly to the neighbour on his right.
‘Gary,’ said a man in a candy-striped shirt and glasses. ‘I’m gay and in the market for a big Dom bear. Sadly, none have joined the group yet, but I live in hope.’
He gave Tom a hopeful look, but apparently it wasn’t reciprocated because he sat back, pressing his lips together.
The last group member was Kevin the biker.
‘I’m a sub,’ he said, surprising me so much that I had to cover it with a sip of my drink. I mean, he was huge and very hairy. It was hard to imagine him bending over for anybody. ‘Yeah, that’s the usual reaction,’ he said. ‘You wouldn’t think it to look at me, but I’m a very gentle guy. I’m looking for a straight version of Maria, but I’m wondering if a woman like that exists.’
He looked so forlorn that I wanted to hug him.
‘Surely the internet must help,’ I said.
‘Nah, there’s a few on there, but they’re all hundreds of miles away. Ah, well. One day.’
‘Over to you,’ said Maria, giving me a pointed look.
‘Oh, yes. I’m Ellie, I’m a recent graduate from the university, currently working as a…a temp. Office work, you know. Nothing interesting. And, as you know, I’m very new to all this, so I can’t wait to find out a bit more.’
‘I’m Tom,’ said Tom, which seemed a bit risky. Real names? ‘I’m a loss adjustor.’
Really? I wasn’t even sure what one of those was, but it was a great cover. Come up with a job so boring nobody wants to ask about it.
‘And are you completely new to all this?’ asked Maria, leaning towards him in a way that made one wonder if her lesbianism was quite set in stone.
‘I’ve dabbled,’ he said with his charming smile. ‘A bit of messing about with girlfriends. I’ve never taken it seriously, though, until now. No equipment or anything like that – just straightforward slap and tickle.’
‘Well, there’s nothing wrong with that,’ purred Maria. ‘Nothing at all. How did you come to hear of us?’
‘I saw your ad on the noticeboard at Safeword,’ he said, to my relief, because I hadn’t realised the group wasn’t invitation-only. ‘Thought I’d quench my curiosity, along with my thirst.’
‘Oh, very good. Here’s to quenching,’ said Maria, lifting her tall glass of gin and tonic.
The conversation moved on and ranged enormously, from kinky club nights to a new moisturising cream that worked wonders on sore bottoms to Joel’s run-in with the university’s vice chancellor. It maintained that kind of ratio – two thirds kink to a third vanilla – until I decided I had to raise the Mia issue.
My opening came during a grumble from Tanya about a puritanical new policy by one of the hosting platforms.
‘If I post anything full frontal, they’ll ban me,’ she complained. ‘But I want to show off these tits. I paid enough for them!’
‘So, do any more of you have blogs?’ I asked, looking around the table.
There was shrugging and muttering.
‘I have a website,’ said Maria. ‘For professional reasons. I don’t post anything too personal though.’
‘I have a little blog as part of my Safeword profile,’ offered Louise. ‘Just ramblings, though. No pictures. I’m just as likely to put a recipe or book review on there as talk about my latest scene.’
‘Do any of you…did any of you…know the Mia Culpa blog?’
‘You’re a bit obsessed with that,’ observed Katie, while the others gave uniform blank looks.
‘Oh! The one with the illustrations!’ exclaimed Tom, helping me out. ‘Is that it? Really good drawings?’
‘Yeah, that’s the one,’ I said gratefully. ‘I think she’s local? Just wondered if anyone…might…know her?’
I trailed off. It seemed increasingly unlikely, from the array of downturned mouths and creased foreheads.
Or did they, and they didn’t want me to know?
Was it a conspiracy of silence?
I looked directly at Joel, whose initial and professional job hadn’t escaped me, and said, ‘She seems to have vanished off the face of the earth lately though.’
‘That reminds me,’ he said, cool as mint. ‘I need to update my academic blog.’
No, it couldn’t be him. And he was married anyway.
‘So,’ said Maria, with a definite ‘let’s change the subject’ tone, ‘it’s occurred to me that we have one new submissive girl and one new toppy boy.’ She gave Tom and me a look at once sharp and conspiratorial. ‘What a coincidence.’
My heart sped up. Were we discovered?
We waited for her to elaborate.
‘I take it you’re both straight?’ she continued.
‘I am,’ I said, and she tutted softly.
Tom nodded.
‘You’d make an attractive couple,’ she said.
I stared at my knees, waiting for my cheeks to cool.
‘I’m sorry.’ She patted my arm. ‘I don’t mean to embarrass you. But why don’t you let me help you along a little? Two newbies, with the same but opposite desires, both looking for new experiences. What if I were to offer you a free session?’
‘Session?’ said Tom.
‘Yes. As you know, I’m a professional Domme. I work from a hired dungeon space in the city. Why don’t you come and visit me, later on this week, and I’ll show the pair of you around and perhaps offer you…a lesson or two?’
‘A lesson in domination?’ said Tom.
‘Ah, you think you have nothing to learn? I’ve met boys like you. But at least consider it.’
‘No, I don’t think that at all,’ said Tom swiftly. ‘Yes, I’d be very interested in learning from you. I can’t answer for El-Ellie.’
She turned to me. My breath was gathering speed like a racehorse on the final straight. I was going to have to accept, but the idea – and Maria, if I was honest – terrified me.
‘What do you think, darling? I’ll be very gentle with you. You needn’t worry about that.
’
‘Oh…well…’ I bit my lip and looked at Tom, who was visibly tense. ‘I don’t really know either of you…’
‘But you want to,’ urged Maria. ‘The dungeon is perfectly safe. It’s at a hotel – you sign in at Reception. They’ll raise the alarm if you don’t come out. Fire regulations, you see.’
‘Oh, I didn’t think…’
What didn’t I think? I could feel Tom’s gritted teeth even though my back was turned to him.
‘OK,’ I said, defeated. ‘All right. I’ll come.’
‘Good girl,’ said Tom, and there was sporadic applause from around the table.
‘Ooh,’ said Maria, impressed. ‘You’re rather a natural, Tom. I’m looking forward to putting you through your paces, I must say.’
Joel stood up, tapping his watch.
‘Sorry, guys,’ he said. ‘Got to go and get dinner on for the starving millions. They’ll be home before too long.’
A variety of other excuses were made, until only Maria, Katie, Ryan, Tom and I were left.
‘Here’s my card,’ said Maria majestically, handing us each a classy little rectangle. ‘I’m thinking Tuesday evening is free for me – what about you?’
Tom checked his phone, and I waited for him to say that he didn’t have any plans that night before adding my voice.
‘Excellent,’ she purred. ‘About seven, then? It’s the Valmont – do you know it?’
We both did (and were both surprised to hear that it housed a dungeon, I imagine).
‘I’ll see you there then.’
Katie spoke up from the other side of the table.
‘Ellie, I know we came together, but do you mind if I leave with Ryan? It’s just that we don’t get too many chances to hook up and we both happen to be free right now, so…’
‘Oh, go for it,’ I said distractedly. ‘Happy spankings.’
They laughed, thanked me, said their goodbyes and almost ran out of the skittle alley in their haste to find privacy.
‘It’s like an addiction,’ said Maria, watching them go. ‘Once you taste it, you thirst for it. Can I give either of you a lift home? Nothing stronger than this slimline tonic has touched my lips.’
‘Oh, no, I was going to…’
‘I’m meeting someone,’ said Tom, whose presence of mind seemed to beat mine by some distance. ‘But thanks.’
‘Pity,’ said Maria. ‘I was thinking you might like to get to know each other a little better. Still…Tuesday isn’t too far away.’
She smiled darkly and gathered her belongings.
We followed her into the darkening street and waved goodbye to her as she walked in the opposite direction to find her car.
‘Fucking hell,’ I said, in a heartfelt manner, as I began to climb the hill towards the city centre.
‘What’s the matter?’ Tom sounded amused. ‘I thought that went well.’
‘My heart was in my mouth the whole time. I was sure she’d rumbled us.’
‘She hasn’t. Don’t worry.’
He looked over his shoulder to make sure she was safely out of sight, then pulled me into his side and marched on up the steep path with me.
‘But do you think it’s a good idea?’ I continued. ‘Really? To go to her…her dungeon?’
‘I’ll tell you what’s a good idea,’ said Tom. ‘We go for a drink at the bar of the Valmont and talk this over.’
‘The Valmont? Oh, God.’
‘Might as well scope it out. And it’s only about ten minutes’ walk from here.’ He patted my bum. ‘Nice dress, by the way. Makes me want to flip that skirt right up.’
‘Not here,’ I said anxiously. Homebound shoppers were all around us as we crossed the street to the piazza.
‘Why not?’ he asked, manoeuvring me against his chest and resting his hands dangerously at the top of my thighs. ‘Let everybody see what you’re really like.’
‘Tom!’ I wriggled and squirmed, but there was definite arousal creeping into the alarm.
He bent his head to kiss the side of my neck, then my ear.
‘Mmm, I wouldn’t really,’ he whispered. ‘Not in public. Not yet. But maybe one day…’
Ten minutes later we sat in the bar at the Valmont, my wobbly legs having somehow carried me the required distance.
‘What if somebody remembers seeing us here together?’ I looked into the depths of the cocktail Tom had bought me. I had no idea what it was, but it smelled of Turkish Delight.
‘What, and tells Maria? Take a look around. The place is busy and I doubt the bar staff moonlight in the dungeon.’
‘They might.’
‘Anyway, we can just say we decided to go for a drink after the munch. No biggie.’
‘But you said you had plans.’
‘Maria’s probably expecting us to hook up sooner or later. I don’t think she’d be exactly flabbergasted.’
‘Well, maybe. God, this is lush.’ My eyes popped open. It really was the nicest drink I’d ever tasted. Shame there was so little change out of a tenner.
In fact, everything about the Valmont was luxe, lavish and redolent of lucre. We sat in a sea of dark red and gold, and velvety textures. If it weren’t for the smoking ban, people would probably be on the opium in the little curtained-off booths that lined the room.
‘How many people do you think are here for the dungeon?’ asked Tom, his eyes crinkling over the rim of his Manhattan.
‘Oh, God – do you think guests are able to use it?’
‘If it’s for private hire…I reckon that couple over there.’
I gave them a swift look. Tom had indicated a man in a blue three-piece suit and a blonde woman in a body-hugging dress.
‘I mean, who wears a suit at five o’clock on a Saturday afternoon?’ he continued.
‘Perhaps he’s been to a wedding. Perhaps the reception’s here,’ I said, looking around for signs of a bride.
‘Then she ought to have come in something a bit less nightclubby,’ said Tom primly.
‘Ooh, get you, Mr Harpers and Queen,’ I teased.
‘Seriously, I bet you. A snifter for Dutch courage, and then they’ll be at it with the whips and chains until their hour is up. Back in here for dinner. Or maybe this is their post-session drink…but both of them seem to be sitting quite comfortably, so I don’t know.’
‘Why don’t you go over and interview them for next week’s paper?’
He turned back to me and grinned. ‘Shall I?’
‘Best not.’
‘Anyway, I don’t care about them. I’m interested in us and our enlightening afternoon.’
‘Did you find it enlightening?’ I took another sip of nectar. ‘They were about as forthcoming as a brick when I brought up the subject of Mia.’
‘Yes, but that’s interesting in itself,’ insisted Tom. ‘It throws up several possibilities. Either they genuinely had no knowledge of her – and that’s unlikely, I think, given her local connection. I’d expect at least one or two of them to know of her, even if they didn’t know her.’
‘So you think they’re lying?’
‘Well, that’s the alternative. It’s not unlikely, for the reasons I’ve mentioned. Maria seems to be a queen bee around here. Given that Mia mentions attending a couple of fetish events with J in her blog, then I’d be surprised if Maria wasn’t at them, or knew people who were.’
‘Hey, Maria is like a long version of Mia,’ I exclaimed, inspired for a second before coming to my senses. ‘But it couldn’t be her. Wrong age, wrong…tendencies.’
‘Tendencies,’ teased Tom. ‘You mean she’s a lesbian Domme.’
‘Well, yeah.’
‘Whereas you and Mia are straight and submissive.’
I sucked in a breath, looking around to make sure nobody had heard.
‘Sh, don’t go on about it in public,’ I begged.
Tom’s smile broadened. ‘Oh? Why not? It’s a private conversation.’
‘It’s just…makes me feel awkward.’
‘You’re blushing.’
‘Exactly. I hate blushing. Stop making me.’
He leaned into me, eyebrows high.
‘Is that meant to be an order, Ms Cox? Because I think you know who gives the orders around here.’
‘Tom, stop it.’ The blush was spreading to my ears, prickling along my hairline. Something similar appeared to be happening a bit lower down my body too.
‘Oh, you dig yourself deeper and deeper by the second.’ He put one long finger on my wrist and gave it a playful tap. For a playful tap, it certainly set off some powerful reverberations. ‘I’d put that shovel down if I were you.’
‘People are looking at us,’ I moaned, though I had no idea if this was true. I ran my finger round and round the rim of my cocktail glass in an attempt to keep my focus away from my knickers.
‘Let them look,’ said Tom softly. ‘Let them see.’ He stroked my inner wrist – not the one occupied with circling the glass – and let his fingertip burrow beneath my watch strap so that it seemed like a kind of miniature binding. ‘Let them see a girl who’s asking for a sore bottom.’
‘Ohhh, no,’ I whispered, but whether I was begging him to stop or carry on was no longer clear to me.
‘Don’t you think it’s obvious to them?’ he pressed on. ‘Your blushes, my expression. They’re all talking about us, the way we talked about that other couple. They’re all saying, “Any minute now, he’s going to take her upstairs and tie her to the bedposts and give her a good, hard seeing-to.” And someone else’ll say, “Oh, but surely he’ll spank her first. Spank her soundly on her bare little bottom until it’s bright red.” And they’d both be right, of course.’
‘Oh, God, I hate you.’ My teeth were clenched, and so was everything else.
He laughed. ‘Another six for that. And six more for lying. You don’t hate me, Foxy.’
‘Yes, I bloody well do.’
‘Six more,’ he sighed. ‘I think we’d better get started soon, or I’m going to need a calculator.’
‘You’re not joking, are you?’ I’d been waiting for the twinkle, or the wink. Neither had shown up.
He shook his head, lips tight together.
Fast and Loose Page 11
