Her whole life was changing. It’d be completely different in less than six months. Maybe she’d change as a person. Maybe Lucas would. Maybe he’d meet someone while she was at UGA.
She didn’t think she could handle that.
She shook her head and decided to look up at the sky instead of at the ground like she had been doing recently.
Ariana got to her car, and she opened the back door to put her stuff in the seat.
She was about to close the door. That’s when she felt someone’s arms around her waist. She didn’t have to turn around to know it was Lucas. She knew his hands, his smell. She was smiling before she turned around.
“Hey,” she said, looking into his eyes. “How was your day?”
“Okay,” he replied. “I wish we had more classes together. We don’t even have lunch together anymore. That used to be the best part of my day, even before we started going out.”
Ariana laughed. “Really?” She remembered last semester how they’d started liking each other and how awkward it was to be around him at first, especially because of Mayra. But she was so happy things turned out the way they had, even if things might eventually end.
“How was your day?” Lucas asked. He was leaning on her car, and she was leaning into him.
“Okay. Lots of homework.”
“Me too. Got senioritis yet?”
“Heck yeah.”
“Me too.” He laughed.
“Oh gosh,” she said with a smile.
“I can’t wait until graduation,” he said.
She felt a pang in her heart.
Lucas whispered, “Actually, I can.”
“I’m visiting UGA in like a week,” she said, looking over at him for a second.
They stood there in silence for a minute, listening and watching the other cars leave the parking lot, then the buses drive away. The constant buzz was dying. She closed her eyes and felt the breeze on her arms while soaking in the bit of sun there was today. It was chilly, but Lucas was warm.
“Realistically, what do you think is going to happen?” she asked. Nothing from Lucas. “Do you think we should…” She couldn’t bring herself to say it.
“Break up?” Lucas asked. He sighed. “The day one of us stops loving the other, definitely. But until then, we’re going to fight to stay together, even if we’re apart. We’ll make this work.”
He looked down at her, and she up at him.
He went on. “I promise you. You’re it for me.”
###
This is it, she thought. She pulled out the driveway. It was a school morning, but instead of Jimmy in the passenger seat, it was her mom.
Jimmy was going to ride with Mayra today because Ariana was finally visiting UGA.
She’d get to see the campus in person and confirm this was where she wanted to go.
She glanced at her mom, who smiled at her while she sipped some coffee. She smiled back but found herself gripping the steering wheel a little extra. It was gonna be a bit of a drive, so they had to leave early. It was only 6:00 a.m., and they were already hitting the road.
“Is there anybody else from your school going?” her mom asked.
“Um, a handful of people, actually,” she said. “Other Hispanic kids who are applying for the scholarship program.”
So awesome but nerve-wracking. She had no idea what to expect come fall or even today. How should she act? What if she did something like ask an obviously dumb question?
At least everyone there was in her same boat, and the lady in charge of the program seemed really nice and funny. She had visited her school last week and gathered a small group of students who were going to be going to UGA.
“You know where you’re going?” her mom asked, bringing her out of her thoughts.
“In theory. I have my phone’s GPS on, but obviously we’ve never been there.”
Her mom nodded. “Good thing we’re a little early then. We can stop for some chicken biscuits if you want.”
“That’s okay,” Ariana said as she pulled onto the freeway. She pressed down on the gas and joined the lane to her left. There wasn’t too much traffic yet. “Remember, they’re giving us breakfast there.”
“Oh, that’s right.” She took another sip of her coffee and glanced behind them as Ariana switched to the fast lane to get ahead of a slow mini-van in front of them. “So what exactly will we be doing today?”
“I’m going to shadow a student a little bit, so I’ll be following them around to their classes. We’ll get a tour, some free lunch at the dining commons, and just some information about a scholarship they’re offering.”
“That’s good. Free food. Free money maybe. I like this school already.”
Ariana laughed, at ease a bit. If there was something about her mom, it was that she loved free food. She just hoped UGA would be a good fit for her too.
###
“This is officially freakin’ awesome,” Ariana said as she walked inside UGA’s huge gym. There were college students working out everywhere, most with earbuds in their ears and facing forward while breaking a mean sweat.
She walked over to an elliptical.
“And they have TVs with cable? Why does the freshman fifteen even exist?” She looked at the girl she’d been paired with. Her name was Nayelli. She was taller than Ariana and easygoing.
“I know, right? But you’d be surprised. No one tells you when to eat and when not to eat. You stay up studying and you get hungry? You can buy yourself something somewhere or go to Snelling, which is open 24/7.”
She patted her stomach, which was almost flat. “I had to learn the hard way last year. I gained some serious weight but began eating healthier and coming in here a few times a week. So basically, don’t stuff your face every day.”
“Wow. I’ll definitely keep that in mind.” Ariana laughed.
Nayelli glanced at her phone. “I have a calculus class coming up in about twenty minutes. We should start heading that way, and you can see what that’s like. There’s only about twenty-five people in that class, though, which isn’t as cool as the three-hundred people biology class I had last year.”
“Three hundred people in one class? How do they all fit?” Maybe that was one of those dumb questions she shouldn’t have asked, but Nayelli didn’t seem to think so.
“There are these huge classrooms that are kind of like a mini stadium. The professor’s at the bottom and there’s this huge screen and the class kind of goes up and around a bit.”
“Oh,” Ariana said, trying to envision it as they walked back out of the gym.
“I’ll show you a class like that later. I personally liked those classes better, but it’s just a preference.”
Ariana nodded as they arrived at the bus stop.
“Okay. We need to get on the East/West bus. Do you see one?”
Ariana glanced around. There was one leaving and one about to get where they were, but it said something else.
“Um, nope.”
“It’ll probably be a few minutes. In the evenings, though, the schedule changes and the buses come through a lot less frequently, which sucks if you don’t have a car and find somewhere to park for free. Sometimes I get stuck waiting for like fifteen, twenty minutes, but now I just ride with one of my friends.”
Pay to park? Ariana thought. She assumed she’d be bringing her car next year, but no one ever had to pay to park in her hometown. How much would it be just to park? She started thinking about all the expenses the program lady had mentioned earlier, like the meal plan, tuition, books, clothes, and everything else.
She knew her parents had a little money saved up since they had been doing financially better in the last couple of years, but not anywhere close to pay for all of her college.
Her stomach sank a little at the thought of not being able to come here because she couldn’t afford it. There was that one scholarship and a few others she had heard of and applied to, but would they be enough? There was also HOPE, which covered he
r tuition if she got As and Bs, but she had to live here the first year in the dorms and she knew that had to be expensive.
“Do you have scholarships?” she asked Nayelli.
“A couple. I still work part-time, though. At this fast food place down the street from my dorm. So I can afford all the fees, books, and the meal plan. I mean, there’s bus fees, technology fees, green fees. Plus my books. My parents weren’t really able to help me out at all with my expenses, so I cover them myself.”
Ariana thought about that. Fees on top of everything else?
“Oh, look. There’s the bus we need to get on.”
Ariana tried to focus on her steps as she got on the bus and took a seat next to Nayelli instead of wondering if she’d actually be coming here next year.
chapter twenty
Ariana took her plate of food over to where her mom was sitting in a corner of the dining hall, which looked nothing like the ugly cafeteria back at her school.
She hadn’t seen her mom most of the morning. All the parents had been in their own informational meetings about what to expect once their kids were in college.
The extensive variety of food at the dining hall had distracted her from her earlier worries, especially because all the walking around had left her starving. She had piled plate after plate of food onto her tray, not to mention a tasty-looking fruit smoothie she was dying to try after being out in the heat.
Now that she saw her mom, though, she needed to ask about how they were going to figure out things financially.
“So are you liking the school?” her mom asked with a smile.
“I love it,” Ariana said. Which would make it that much more devastating if she couldn’t come here after all. She took a bite of her Philly steak sandwich. “Hmm, this is so good.” She took a sip of her smoothie. “Oh my gosh, this is better. And it’s healthy. Why can’t I eat like this every day?”
She glanced at her mom, who was giving her the look.
She decided it was time to change the topic. Her mom looked back down at her spaghetti and continued eating.
“So, Mom. Did they tell you about how much it costs to come here and everything?” She took another bite of her sandwich, enjoying the cheesiness.
“Oh yeah. Almost twenty thousand a year.”
Ariana’s mouth fell open, and she had to cover her mouth quickly with her hand so her food wouldn’t show.
“You can’t be serious.” She guessed it made sense with the dorm, meal plan, books, fees, and tuition.
Her mom nodded. “They’re giving you scholarships, right?”
“I mean, I applied for some yeah, and I should have HOPE because of my grades, but I haven’t really calculated how much I might need after that. It just depends how many scholarships I get.”
Her voice got smaller and smaller with each word she said. It became hard to swallow, and she couldn’t help but sigh and put down her sandwich.
“If you really want to come here, we’ll figure it out. Don’t worry,” her mom said. She looked up at her, but looking at her mom’s eyes, Ariana knew she was saying what a mom should say right now. She just wasn’t sure if her mom truly believed that.
Her mom looked down. “We’ll take out a loan every year if we have to.”
“No,” Ariana replied immediately. “It’s way too much, even with your raise. I don’t want to come here if it means you and dad getting into a whole bunch of debt. It’s not worth it.”
“We disagree,” her mom said.
The one up side to not coming to UGA? At least she wouldn’t have to choose between UGA and Lucas.
But she knew she’d always wonder.
###
“What’s wrong, babe?” Lucas said. He put his hand on hers as they headed to his house. It was his day off. Her parents had finally said it would be okay as long his mom was there, and she would be. For a few minutes at least, before she left for work.
She’d left that part out, though. She needed some alone time with Lucas. Or at least as alone as they could get with his two sisters around.
She sighed but didn’t really want to talk about it.
“You never really told me about what UGA was like. Did you love it or what?” He had a smile on his face. He truly wanted her to be happy. She could tell from the way he always asked for updates.
“It was awesome,” she replied.
“Then what’s up?” he asked. “Is it about…you leaving?”
“A little. It’s just that I don’t even know if I’ll be able to go. It’s kind of expensive, and it just depends on the scholarships I get, if any, because I’m not sure if my parents are gonna be able to afford to help me with much.”
Lucas stared at the steering wheel in front of him after he pulled in to his driveway and turned off the car.
It was quiet for a few seconds before he asked, “Have you asked your parents about it?”
“Yeah. They can help me with a couple thousand maybe, but it wouldn’t be enough. HOPE will cover my tuition, but then there’s the dorm since I have to live there the first year, the meal plan, the fees, gas, and other stuff and I just don’t want them to have to take out a loan or get into serious credit card debt or something.”
More silence from Lucas.
“This is one of those times I wish I was a millionaire, so the people I love didn’t have to worry about something as dumb as money.”
Ariana smiled, despite her thoughts going a million miles an hour. She squeezed his hand. “This isn’t your fault.”
“I know. I just wish I could help. I don’t really have much saved up. You know if I did—”
Ariana kissed him. Hard.
She finally pulled back a minute later. “I could never let you do that. What you do for your family, for your mom and sisters, is amazing.”
She had tears in her eyes now, and if she kept talking, they’d flow down her cheeks. “Like we keep on saying, if it’s meant to happen, it will happen.” She looked at him. “Right?”
He smiled softly. “Right.”
###
“Happy birthday to you,” everyone sang around the table. Jimmy looked around with a goofy smile on his face. “Happy birthday, dear Jimmy, happy birthday to you.”
Ariana’s phone buzzed. It was Lucas.
I miss you. Wish I could be there with you.
He had to work all day. He hardly had any days off and worked even more hours than before. Someone had quit, and they were short on people at the clothing store where he worked.
“It’s actually a good thing, I guess,” he had said as they talked about it while having lunch a couple weeks before. “I need to save up some money anyway. My mom kinda wanted to take my sisters to the beach this summer, so I can help pitch in. We’ve never been on vacation.”
“When you said you needed to save money, I thought you meant for college in the fall,” Ariana said, putting her fork down.
Lucas sighed. “That too.”
Now Ariana’s dad went over to the stereo in the living room and pushed play.
Estas son las mananitas…
The equivalent of the birthday song in Mexico began playing. It was one of Ariana’s favorite songs to listen to, but it was really long, and she didn’t know all the words.
Her mom squeezed Jimmy’s shoulder and kissed him on the cheek. Ariana playfully bumped into Mayra, who gave her a smile. Ryan looked on politely from the opposite end of the table. It was a given he’d be invited to Jimmy’s birthday every year.
When the song was over, they all clapped and cheered.
“Que le muerda,” Ariana said, still clapping. Everyone joined her, except for Ryan, who watched and realized what was happening.
Ariana went over behind Jimmy.
“Bite it,” Mayra shouted.
“Yeah, right,” Jimmy replied, staring behind him at Ariana, who was ready to shove his head into the cake as soon as he let his guard down for the briefest of moments.
“I’m protecting you from everyo
ne else,” Ariana said.
Jimmy laughed, and Ariana took advantage of his glance towards everyone else.
She shoved his face down hard, except his head was turned slightly to the side.
It worked, though. Jimmy came back up with over half his face covered in blue and white frosting.
“It’s up my nose,” he said, his voice funny. “And my eyebrows.”
Everyone laughed and their mom led him from his seat to the kitchen seat. She heard the faucet come on as she headed back to where Mayra was.
They high-fived and looked at the cake. They had only messed up a small part of it.
Ariana’s mom came back into the slice the cake and pass pieces around. Ariana went to help her put the pieces on the plates and hand them out.
“This looks so good,” Mayra said, holding her plate. “I love pastel de tres leches. And it has strawberries.” She grabbed a fork and took a seat to dig in.
“Ryan, can you put some water bottles on the table for me?” her mom asked as she continued cutting.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, walking into the kitchen to grab some from the pack. Ariana handed her dad a small piece. He wasn’t big on sweets.
He came back in a second later with a handful of water bottles, and Ariana handed him his piece of cake.
“Thanks,” he said, looking at it and walking back to his seat.
“I think that’s everyone,” Ariana told her mom. “Just us left.”
Her mom set Jimmy’s piece, the one that had been practically flattened, aside for him.
As they all sat down to eat and talk, Jimmy walked back in.
“You still have some on your chin,” Mayra said with a smile.
Jimmy groaned and grabbed a napkin before sitting down. He reached for his plate. “Yes,” he whispered. “My favorite.”
A few minutes later, they were finishing eating. Their mom went to the kitchen to begin cleaning while their dad went outside to have a beer.
Jimmy looked in Mayra’s direction and winked. She rolled her eyes but smiled.
“This time next year, I’ll have a car and my license. I can’t wait,” he said.
Unending Love Page 16
