I nodded, and he winked. “Alright little lady, you’re more than welcome to go! See you next month.”
I held my shiver in check until he’d closed the door, and I let out a breath of air.
Then an irrational rage swept through me.
If that bastard boyfriend of mine didn’t have to be so irrational about children, then I wouldn’t be freaking out right now alone. I’d have him holding me, telling me we’d never see that fucker again.
Because I knew damn well that Michael would’ve felt the same coming from him as I had.
I left the little room, waving at Dalia as I headed in the direction of the ultrasound room.
I found the room, and immediately realized that I’d fucked up.
Because Memphis, the wife of another member of the SWAT team, was smiling brightly at me.
“I just knew it!” She crowed happily. “I knew it!”
I blinked.
“Knew what?” I asked carefully.
“When I saw your chart. I bet Michael’s so happy!” She cheered happily.
Wrong. Michael didn’t even know!
“Umm, Michael doesn’t know,” I told her softly.
Her eyes cleared of their happiness.
“What?” She asked.
I was sure that was a shock to her.
Downy, her husband, was a really good man who’d been over the moon at hearing that Memphis was pregnant.
She probably didn’t even realize that some men didn’t feel the same way that hers did.
“Yeah, I haven’t told him yet,” I informed her. “And I’m not sure I want to…or how to.”
She blinked. “But why? He’s Saint. He’s the baby whisperer. He loves children.”
Yeah, I could see this going really wrong. “Michael doesn’t want kids,” I finally said. “I don’t know how he’ll react to hearing that I’m pregnant, nor if he’d be happy about it. If I’m being honest, I’m fairly sure he’s going to flip out and leave me.”
“Oh, Nikki. I’m sorry,” she whispered forlornly.
I shrugged.
It was what it was.
I’d deal with everything else once it happened.
Tonight, though, I’d tell him. I didn’t want him finding out from a friend when it should be coming from his woman. At least I could give him that.
Chapter 15
Nobody cares about your problems. We’ve got enough shit of our own to deal with.
-Michael to a suspect
Michael
“Surprise!” I said, throwing the door to the restaurant that I’d rented for the night open, revealing all of our family and friends.
Nikki’s mouth dropped open in surprise.
“What…why…what…” she stuttered, flabbergasted.
I smiled.
“Congratulations on your certification, best friend,” Georgia said, wrapping her arms around Nikki and hugging her tightly.
“Oh, my God!” Nikki jumped up and down, then turned and barreled into me, knocking me off balance. “You are the best man ever.”
I huffed out a laugh and let her go when her parents made their way over to us.
“Mom, dad!” She cried in happiness.
And that’s when I knew.
I did all this just to get that very smile on her face.
“You did good, suck up,” Nico said, slapping me on the back.
I snorted and turned, offering him my hand.
He took it and narrowed his eyes on me.
“I can see now that you’ll try to worm your way into my parents’ hearts. But it won’t work. I’m the favorite,” he deadpanned.
I blinked.
He was serious as far as I could tell.
Or maybe he was just that good at holding onto his composure.
“No you’re not!” A young woman that looked a lot like Nikki, but had yet to develop all the luscious curves said. “I am!”
Nico glared at her. “What the fuck are you wearing, Nila?”
She looked down at the short skirt that clung to her toned thighs. “A skirt. What’s wrong with it?”
“Uh,” Nico said, slapping his head and looking to me for direction. “I know you have a sister. Does she dress like a harlot?”
I shook my head. “No. Not anymore, at least. She had a baby at sixteen, though.”
Nico’s eyes turned murderous. “You will not have a baby! And ruin your life! Pull your skirt down.”
“Our babies ruined your life?” Georgia asked with laughter filling her voice.
Nico’s ‘babies’ were now one year old’s, but Nico still acted like they were born yesterday.
“Yeah, when was the last time we had se…” Georgia slapped her hand over Nico’s mouth before he could finish your sentence.
“…you will watch your mouth around our friends, you randy bastard,” Georgia hissed at her husband.
I cracked up and turned to Nila. “It’s nice to meet you, finally, Nila. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Nila smiled. “And I you. Although all that Nikki and I have spoken about is the fact that you can give it to her…”
“Not you, too!” Georgia kept right on hissing. “What is wrong with you Pena’s? Obviously, Nikki has the right way of it, finding a man to get her the hell out of this fucked up family.”
Nico laughed, as did Nila.
I, though, froze. Was she talking to Georgia about getting married?
I hadn’t actually thought much past the summer, but the thought of being with Nikki forever really made me happy.
Like, manic happy.
Which also worried me.
I didn’t want to marry her yet.
We needed time to get to know each other.
She’d never even witnessed any of my manic/depressive episodes.
I, at least, needed to get through this winter with her, then I could think about marriage.
Right now, I was just happy having her in my arms, knowing she’d be there when I woke up.
“Michael?” Nikki called to me.
I looked over to see her parents and her studying me.
I turned and walked away from the arguing siblings, offering my hand to Sol, once again.
“How’s it going?” I asked.
He smiled.
“You did a good job, keeping this from her. I was just telling her that you were the one to organize all of this,” Sol said.
Nikki looked from her father to me.
“You’re good at keeping secrets,” she teased. “I’m usually the first one to talk my family into opening the presents. Next time I’ll have to pay attention for the signs of you hiding something.”
I snorted. “You’d never figure out if I was hiding something from you. You, on the other hand, are an open book.”
Her eyes widened. “Really?”
I nodded.
Then her eyes narrowed. “I’m good at keeping secrets, though.”
Then Memphis and Downy walked up, effectively ending our conversation.
“Lolita! Did you bring me some tamales?” Downy asked loudly.
Lolita blushed. “No, my Downy, I didn’t. But I’m making some tomorrow, so I’ll be sure to bring you some by the station.”
Downy grinned.
“Score!” he said, pulling his arm down quickly from head height. “Make ‘em hot! You know how I like ‘em!”
Lolita rolled her eyes, and I turned to Memphis, only to see her looking at Nikki oddly.
She was staring at the glass of champagne in Nikki’s hand like it was a viper.
“What?” I asked her.
Memphis turned and looked at me with wild eyes.
The first thing I noticed she saw was my bare arms, causing her eyes to widen further.
“Holy shit!” She announced loudly. “You got a new one!”
I looked down at my bare arms and grimaced.
I’d gone without the
long sleeves tonight for Nikki.
I knew she liked when I showed them off.
And, although I did it for her, I wasn’t comfortable with it.
I didn’t like explaining why I had so many tattoos. Because with that explanation came the explanation of the fact that I suffered from depression and I was bi polar.
Which only launched into more conversations that I didn’t want to have.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nikki turn to place her champagne glass down on a nearby table and turn to me.
I raised a brow at the move, but she only winked and walked away, talking to even more of her friends and family, leaving me to explain to Memphis something that I didn’t even want to get into.
***
Two hours later, the champagne dilemma was brought up again.
“Nikki, why aren’t you drinking any champagne? I bought it specifically for you!” Georgia asked, thrusting yet another glass at her.
Nikki once again waved it off. “No, I’m not interested in champagne tonight. I want to enjoy this night, not forget it.”
Somewhat mollified, Georgia took the drink to her lips and sipped, keeping her eyes on Nikki, studying her.
I studied Nikki, too.
She’d not had a drink in a very long time, now that I thought about it.
Why?
Making a note to question her later, I turned back to the conversation at hand.
“So they’re making budget cuts? Where? Are they going to take away our new body armor? The vehicles that they promised? The overtime pay that they force us to take?” Nico asked in outrage at hearing what Luke had just said.
Luke shook his head. “I’m only telling you the rumors I’m hearing, and explaining why I’ll be attending the town hall meeting.”
“Well, how about they lower the amount of pay the mayor makes, or some of the city officials? Why not take the budget cuts out of the fuckin’ flowers that they plant in the middle of the road. Or the new red lights they keep putting up that only do more problem than good,” Nico muttered darkly.
Luke held his hands up in surrender.
“That’s why I mentioned it. I want y’all to go to the meeting with me this Friday,” Luke said.
After a few grunts of confirmation, Luke turned to me.
“I’ve also wanted to talk to you today, too, but I could never get you. Have you heard any more about those murders?” He asked.
We all knew which ones he was talking about.
Everyone did.
It was now public information after the fourth one in forty square miles and two weeks happened.
“Wolf is up and talking, but he’s only been able to give the minutest of details. He can attest to the black clothes, the black hoodie, and the black boots. We know he had black hair, and he was about five foot nine or ten. Whipcord lean. About one hundred and eighty pounds,” I told them. “But y’all already know that. Parker and Elliott aren’t sharing much else yet. Wolf is getting released on Monday, though. And, hopefully, he’ll be approved to adopt Nathan like he’s looking to do since he has no other family,” I informed them.
Luke nodded.
“I heard the boy’s finally doing better,” Downy said around a mouthful of cake. “When’s he get to go home?”
I shook my head. “Only time will tell with him. He’s got some swelling on his brain that’s causing him to act a lot differently than he was before, so they’re waiting for that to go down some more before they make any plans of him getting released.”
“Fuck,” Miller said, pulling his beer up to his lips and taking a sip.
My sentiments exactly.
“You’re pregnant!” Noel crowed. “That’s why you’re not drinking.”
My heart froze in my chest at the declaration from Nikki’s little sister, and I started to pay a little more attention.
“What? No! I’m not!” Nikki shook her head savagely.
Even though she denied it immediately, I started to connect some dots.
Throwing up.
No period that I’d seen as of yet.
And I would’ve noticed any of the million times we’d fucked in the past month and a half.
Weight gain.
Why she needed new pants at the mall today.
Why her nipples were so fuckin’ tender lately.
I’d barely brushed them in the shower this morning, and it had her begging for me all over again.
“’Scuse me,” I muttered, eyes connecting with Nikki’s.
Her eyes widened slightly, flaring with something I couldn’t read, and then disappeared before she schooled her features.
Then she excused herself from her friends and followed me out of the restaurant, then further outside.
I didn’t stop until we were in the shadows along the side of the building.
I could hear Nikki’s flip flops flapping against her feet as she walked behind me.
The wind from the impending storm flapping her skirt as she hurried to catch up to me.
But my strides were too fast for her.
She didn’t catch up to me until I stopped in shadows so deep that I couldn’t tell she was standing in front of me before I moved my arms out to catch her before she slammed into my front.
“Now’s not the time for lying, Nikki,” I said breathlessly.
I was breathless because I was freaking the fuck out.
I was a doctor for fuck’s sake.
I knew the signs.
I was also smarter than I’d been acting.
I guess I wanted so bad to give Nikki the benefit of the doubt that I ignored the signs.
I never looked to see if she was taking the birth control.
Mother. Fucker.
“Michael,” she said, pressing her hand against my abs.
And I suddenly forgot what she and I were fighting about.
Mostly because her mouth was on mine, and her hands were wrapping around my neck.
She held on tight as I started to fight her, but then she pressed those delicious hips against my raging cock, and I forgot that I was mad.
Forgot that my life had just changed.
Forgot that she was trying to distract me.
Because she did distract me.
And I took the bait.
Hook, line, and fucking sinker.
My mouth slammed down on hers as I gathered her up into my arms.
The slinky skirt that reached her ankles tangling up in her legs as I tried to lift her up.
She and I both shoved the skirt up until it rested up around her hips, then I moved until I pressed her against the brick wall of the building we’d just exited.
“Nikki,” I growled, grinding my dick into her pussy.
“Yeah?” She asked, need evident in her voice.
She rocked her hips against my cock, and keened when I hit her clit just right.
“Please…just don’t lie,” I begged.
She didn’t answer, which I guess that was answer enough.
“Nikki,” I said, reaching between us to rip my cock free from the dress slacks and place it at her entrance. “Why?”
She shook her head. “I did everything right. I swear on my life, Michael. I did everything right.”
My eyes closed, and my heart felt like it was breaking as she sank down slowly onto my cock.
Her heat fisted my dick, covering each and every single inch of skin covering my length.
My eyes closed, not that it mattered anyway since it was pitch black outside now.
The lone light we’d been using for the minimal lighting it gave went out when a hard burst of wind screamed between the buildings.
Nikki gasped, and I couldn’t figure out if it was because of the pure darkness, or the way I rammed into her, taking my frustration about the entire situation out on her pussy.
“Michael,” she gasped, clinging tighter.
“Take it,” I order
ed.
She leaned down and bit my neck, hard.
And I exploded.
It was all too much.
The way she clenched around me.
The way she smelled.
The thought of her carrying my baby.
A baby that was a miracle in it’s own right, but would probably grow up to be just like me.
“I finished without you,” I murmured into her hair.
She petted my head, running her nails along my scalp and making shivers chase down my spine.
“That’s okay,” she whispered softly. “Just don’t do it again.”
I laughed humorlessly and pulled out of her, letting her feet fall back towards the ground.
Once I knew she was steady, I let her hips go.
Her skirt fell from my grasp as I did, and we sat there in an awkward silence.
Me with my head against her shoulder, and her with her arms still around me.
“What are we going to do?” I rasped, eyes clenching tight.
A sob caught in her throat, and I knew that she didn’t do this on purpose.
I knew it with all my heart and soul.
And when she whispered, “I don’t know, but I love you,” I knew that I would do whatever it took to come to terms with this.
Because I had just as much of a part in the conception of this child as she did.
And that’s what a man did.
Stepped up to the plate.
Chapter 16
So tell me what you want, what you really, really want.
-T-shirt
Nikki
I knew he wouldn’t find me here.
It was the one place I could go without anyone finding me.
Salsarita Mamacita’s.
My family wouldn’t be caught dead here.
It was the poorest quality dancing place in town.
Plus, Michael didn’t dance.
He’d told me so.
Many, many times.
When I’d be dancing around the kitchen making dinner, he’d just roll his eyes at me in exasperation when I tried to get him to join in.
Something about attending too many dances when he was younger or some bullshit excuse like that.
It’d been two months since I’d told Michael that I was pregnant.
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