“I knew I could count on you.”
“All right, then,” Dorrie said, holding onto the arms of the chair to propel herself up. Lost in thought, she trudged back to her desk. She’d known this day would come, but it still hurt.
***
At home, she flung her purse onto the couch and propped her feet on the recliner to ease her bloated ankles. In her present condition, she felt so helpless, and didn’t like the feeling.
She couldn’t get over losing her position at the Institute. She’d come to identify herself with her role, and it stung to realize Patricia’s flawless persona would replace her own likeness on countless TV screens and ads. Of course, Roman had every right to choose whomever he wished. It was his product and his company. Still, it hurt. Why?
She knew the answer, but didn’t like it. I’ve changed, but not in a good way. I want to be the one who’s famous, not her.
Deep down, Dorrie knew Patricia’s flaws were like her own, though on a larger scale.
Somewhere along the line Dorrie’s attitude had changed. She’d come to value looks over the person inside. No matter what Roman said, the loss of any part of her beauty struck a blow to her pride. She yearned to be perfect again, instead of going around with cheeks full and belly straining against baby fat.
Sighing, she told herself it would be worth losing her figure for the sake of bringing a child into the world. And if that child were not perfect, she’d not hold it up to the superficial standards she’d set for herself. What Roman’s attitude would be, she had no idea.
After watching a few TV comedies to dull her mind, she got ready for bed. It wasn’t easy to fall asleep, not with the image of her haughty replacement burned in her brain.
She’d almost drifted off when another thought struck her. In the day’s excitement, she’d forgotten to worry about the dratted spy camera.
The more she thought of it, the more unlikely it seemed. Everything seemed normal at the Institute. Jeanne’s theory couldn’t be true. Her friend had shouldered a huge responsibility caretaking Mike. She had to be at loose ends now, with her mind flitting back and forth, carrying worries to the extreme, latching onto Dorrie as the next person at risk, carrying the big sister role too far.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Roman faced the man behind the desk in the darkened sub-basement. “I’ve vetted the new model, and given her the radioiodine. She believes it’s a booster which will make the pills work faster. I’ve also contacted the next test subjects, and informed them they’ll receive the booster here.”
The squat man rubbed his chin. “Good. After the ads, I’m sure they’re dying to take the pills, no matter the risk. Let’s see now. You’ve got Donato’s promo in the can, right?”
Roman nodded.
“Then what are we waiting for? Train the new woman yourself. You don’t need Donato. Let’s get the kid out and see what it looks like.”
“She’s got at least a month and a half to go. Also, Mrs. Donato wants a normal delivery, not a cesarean.”
“What she wants doesn’t matter. Thanks to her good friend in Wisconsin, the widow is wise to the bugs, so to hell with waiting. I want that kid. I say we remove the widow from her house, get the kid and sweep the place before the Kingston cop comes snooping.”
Roman’s brain froze, again thinking of instances in the news where women were cut open and fetuses forcibly removed. He didn’t want that horror for Dorrie.
“I don’t see the rush. The cop’s wife says the husband’s on double shift, so he’s no threat. The widow’s not dumb enough to leave the Institute at this stage. No matter what her friend suggested, she’s dependent on us for the pills and security. She loves that kid and won’t do anything to jeopardize it. The longer it stays in, the more useful it will be. You’ve been patient this long. Don’t lose your cool now.”
The man sighed. “Okay, you win again, but let’s not make this a habit. We’ll keep a watchful eye for early labor or anything untoward. Under no circumstances must that child escape.”
Roman nodded.
The man leaned forward “Now, about that friend...”
***
As promised, the extra chair awaited her. Dorrie restrained a grimace at the sight of the haughty Patricia behind the desk, and bade her a good morning. She began the session by explaining the software programs to Patricia. “The main ones are Diamond, a word processing program, and Versa, for graphics. Here’s a little about how they work.”
“Don’t waste your time, dearie. I’m a software whiz and can figure it out myself.”
Dorrie smiled at the woman, though inwardly she fumed. “That may be so, Patricia, but it’s my job to show you what I know, so let’s do it. Here’s a sample brochure, and here’s where you’ll find the graphics files. I’ve saved some of them under different names, so you can practice on them. For this exercise, try deleting the photos and replacing them, then type in some ad lingo, whatever you wish, until you get the hang of it.”
The woman gave Dorrie a knowing look. “This is quite unnecessary. I’ve already said I’m a quick learner. I aced all my classes at business college. I’ll have no trouble at all.”
“Well, let’s practice to be absolutely sure, all right?” If there was anything she hated, it was a know-it-all, and this woman fit the bill.
A short time later, Patricia said, “That was simple.”
Good grief, what self confidence. How did people get that way? Dorrie wished a smidgeon of it would rub off on her. She could use it.
“My, you were fast. Just to be sure, let’s take a look.”
Dorrie slowly got up from the spare chair and leaned over to check the screen. Unfortunately, she found no fault with the woman’s efforts. That was depressing. It had taken her much longer to catch onto the program. “Good job. Now let’s try the next project.”
Patricia whipped through that, plus another, and another, all at record speed. Dorrie felt as if their roles should be reversed and Patricia the teacher. Not that she’d suggest such a thing. The woman’s head was already the size of a hot air balloon.
By the time she arrived home, not only did her forehead pound from thinking up new projects to keep Patricia busy, but also the baby, apparently attuned to the mother’s mood, kicked and moved about, making Dorrie’s insides sore.
She wearily discarded her shoes in favor of slippers, then opened the refrigerator to pull out hamburger, lettuce, tomato and bun, plus potato salad and an apple. No matter how tired she got by the end of the day, she wouldn’t deviate from preparing something nourishing for herself and the baby.
After dinner, she rinsed the dishes and deposited them into the dishwasher, then sank onto the oak kitchen chair and pressed her fingers to her forehead.
Too many tension headaches lately. She didn’t need this pressure. She had enough to deal with. The closer she got to her due date, the more her nerves kicked in. Every hard luck story she’d ever heard about excruciating pain and tedious hours of labor flashed through her mind, along with the grim possibility the baby may not survive. It was hard enough for a normal mother to give birth, without considering the pill factor. Anything could happen.
“Please, God, please make my baby be all right,” she prayed, glancing upward.
That was the wrong thing to do. Looking up made her remember Jeanne’s idea. She’d been trying to ignore it, yet at times like this her defenses crumbled. Biting her lip, she glanced around the corners of the kitchen, with its harmless looking oak cabinets and floral wall paper. Hard to believe such normal appearances could be deceiving.
“If I were a bug, where would I hide,” she said out loud. Realizing what she’d done, she covered her mouth in horror.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Good grief, if there were bugs in the room, she’d admitted she knew of them. In case someone was watching, she better say something to smooth it over. “I am such a loon for listening to Jeanne. I don’t know what she was thinking of, spouting such nonsense.
She has such a wild imagination.”
Did she sound convincing? More importantly, did she look it? Probably not. She’d never been a good actress. It hadn’t mattered with the pill, because she’d totally believed in its efficacy. This was different.
Well, what was done was done. She couldn’t take back what she’d said, and couldn’t afford any more angst in her life from dwelling on it. She’d have to hope for the best.
She leaned on the table to get up, then made her way to the family room couch so she could be distracted by the fictional world of TV. She tried to laugh through a silly comedy, but in the background her mind traveled to places she preferred not to go. At first, it had been fun being young again. Now, she spent most of her time worrying about hers and the baby’s future. Too many What Ifs clouded her mind.
What if the baby didn’t turn out right? How could she provide for it? Insurance might cover the costs, but she didn’t know how much. Could she count on Roman to help financially if their child was deformed or sick?
More what ifs plagued her. In real years she was over fifty-five. What if she died giving birth? Who would care for her baby? She couldn’t count on Roman who hadn’t wanted the child in the first place. Hopefully, Jeanne would step in.
What if the baby didn’t make it? It would be hell losing her child after bonding with it for so many months.
Still more What Ifs flashed through her mind. What if labor lasted a long time? What if it really hurt? What if the baby ended up in the wrong position and she needed a cesarean?
Dorrie groaned. She couldn’t handle any more exhausting scenarios. She stretched out on the couch to close her eyes for a little while, and ended up falling into a fitful sleep.
Halfway through the night, she awoke disoriented, wondering where she was. When she figured it out, she decided to get up. Holding tightly to the banister, she made her way up the stairs to her lonely bed.
After another morning of feeling unneeded and inferior, Dorrie met Kelly at the cafeteria. She’d refrained from speaking to her friend about Patricia the day before, but this time couldn’t resist spilling her guts. “You would not believe this woman. She’s like a super whiz who immediately understands everything I’ll say before I say it. I’m surprised she’s not a lawyer or something fancy, instead of an office worker. With her smarts, she could be anything.”
“I’d think that would make her easier to teach.”
Dorrie smiled ruefully. “Not so. It’s the exact opposite. I’m working so hard to keep her occupied I’m absolutely drained by the end of the day.”
Her friend lifted her eyebrows. “I’d like to meet this paragon. If there’s something wrong with her, I’ll find it.”
“Be my guest. You’ll soon discover she’s absolutely in love with herself and hasn’t a humble bone in her body.”
“If that’s the case, she’ll be unbearable once she’s reverted.”
“That’s putting it mildly.”
“Just for the heck of it, I’ll try lunching with her. I could use some entertainment, with Doug on double shift.”
Dorrie rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t wish that on you. You’d regret it for sure.”
“But think of all the fun we’d have, rehashing what she says.”
“Best not even try. She’s a complete irritation.”
“Maybe you’re right. I don’t need any aggravation.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
When her cell rang the following Monday, Keith’s number flashed on Caller ID. She pressed the button and said, “I’ll be right there.”
It was a beautiful evening, still close to sixty out, so she may as well enjoy it. That’s what she told herself as she slipped into the backyard and sat on the wrought iron bench near the dormant rose bushes. “Okay, I’m back.”
“Listen, Dorrie, I want to apologize. I should have called sooner, but you know me, I’m all over the place. Anyway, the more I think of your situation, the more I feel bad about what I said. It’s not my place to judge you.
“You’ve had a tough time, going it alone, after being married to Larry for so long. I understand how you could have taken a few drinks to unwind. I admire you for deciding to go ahead and have the baby. Some women would have taken the easy way out.”
Tears welled in her eyes. “Thanks so much for your understanding, Keith. I’m so glad we can be friends again. I hated the thought you didn’t trust me. As far as the baby is concerned, I consider it a gift from God. It’s coming at a time when I need someone to bond with. My life’s been pretty empty without Larry.”
“He was a great guy. I miss him like hell, too. Listen, if you need any help at all, I’m here for you. Please know that.”
“Thanks, Keith. It’s very kind of you to offer. And again, don’t worry about what you said before. I know it all came as a shock to you. It did to me, too, but sometimes things happen for a reason.”
“I’m sure you’ll be a great mother.”
“Thanks, Keith. Well, enough about me. What’s happening in your corner of the world? Did you have a good Christmas and New Year’s? Have you found the woman of your dreams yet?”
She and Larry had had a running joke with Keith about his inability to settle down. With his interests so prolific, he had small time to devote to a relationship.
“Are you kidding? You know there’s not a woman on earth who’d have me.”
“One of these days you’ll find one as busy as you and it’ll be the perfect match. You know, like one of those long distance marriages in the movies where you meet once a month on top of the Empire State Building, or some other special place.”
“I’m not sure even that arrangement would work. This week’s a model train exhibit, classic movie marathon, a wrestling match, and a comic book convention for starters, not to mention my day job at Chicago Chem.”
Dorrie laughed. “I’m afraid moving from Tomahawk to Chicago has only fed your mania. Now that you have so many choices it’s a wonder you find time to sleep.”
“Too true. Sleep’s a last option when all else fails. Now, what about you? How’re you getting along?”
“Fine, except for the mood swings between absolute terror about childbirth and excitement beyond belief. The due date’s almost a month away.”
“You’re a trooper. I’m sure you’ll pull through fine.”
“I hope so. I’m trying to think positive, but sometimes it’s hard, especially with all the weird stuff going on around here, keeping me on edge.”
“What kind of stuff? Maybe I can help.”
“I’ll tell you if you promise not to say, ‘I told you so,’ or anything like that, okay?”
“I’ll bite my tongue.”
“Well, here goes. Steve probably told you about Mike’s dying, right?”
“Yeah, I wish I could have made it to his services.”
“Anyway, Mike had been taking the young pill for a few months, but Roman said his death was unrelated. Now I’m not so sure it was.”
She went to explain her growing misgivings and what she’d discovered on the iPhone.
“If what you say is correct, it sounds like Mike didn’t stand a chance. My God, Dorrie, are you sure you’re all right?”
“I’m fine, in fact better than ever. I don’t know if it’s because I had an underactive thyroid to begin with, or just plain luck. Plus, now that I’m on it, it’s not so simple to get off, especially with the baby dependent on it.”
“I don’t like the sound of this.”
“It gets more confusing. I didn’t tell you my house was broken into a few months ago. My nerves were already on edge from that even before what happened to Mike. I’d give anything to move back to Tomahawk, but the pill agreement and the bad housing market keep me stuck right here.”
“That’s not good.”
“And there’s more.”
“Dorrie, I thought I was leading an exciting life. Yours has mine beat, hands down. Okay, what else?”
“I’d convinced
myself the break-in had to be for drug money and whoever did it wouldn’t come back, but then Jeanne got me all nervous again.”
“Ah, yes, your big sister. What was her contribution to your erratic life?”
“Well, I was so worried about what I’d read on the iPhone, I brought it home and spent an entire Sunday copying all of it onto my laptop computer.
“At work, a few days later, by some coincidence, Roman mentioned the formula Larry had vetted wasn’t the one he’d released, and he’d improved it since then. I was so relieved that I called and told Jeanne. She thought it was too coincidental that out of the blue he’d mentioned about the improved formula, and said she wouldn’t be surprised if he’d planted bugs in my house.”
“And now you don’t know if you’re being watched, which of course makes you upset, plus you can’t find a way out of your mess.”
“Right. I’m on pins and needles. To top it off, the new computer I bought after the house was robbed decided to crash when I turned it on a few days after putting the iPhone stuff on it. Technical support diagnosed the problem as a non-removable deadly virus. For now, I’ve decided not to go through the aggravation of getting everything set up on another one and wondering if it will crash.”
Keith whistled. “Wow, Dorrie, that’s really wild. Still, you never know, with all the espionage stuff going on these days, anything’s possible.”
Dorrie’s heart sank. She’d hoped Keith would say Jeanne’s theory was way off the wall.
“It’s a rotten shame you work in Chicago, Keith. I could keep you busy day and night trying to solve my problems. You’d have a ball,” she said with a short laugh.
“I love challenges and I’d be glad to take yours on; but unfortunately, I don’t get a vacation for six months. Still, there may be something I can handle from here. I hate to have all this stuff hanging over your head with your babe on the way. Too bad your computer crashed or I could check out the formula, and maybe throw some light on things.”
Forever Young: Blessing or Curse (Always Young Trilogy) Page 18
