"Y...yes, sir," I panted out. I did, and I feared he was turning me into an adrenaline junkie.
He came around and stood in front of me again. He raised the crop, and I shivered as he brushed the soft leather tip across my upper chest, the sweet sensation making me sigh even as it made me tense with anticipation. He slid it caressingly down between my breasts, circling each of my already hard pebbled nipples, before moving the crop softly up my neck and to my lips. It felt cool and smooth against them.
"Kiss it," he demanded. "Lick it."
I obeyed, feeling wanton and so very naughty as I did it, kissing and licking the leather tip lingeringly as he watched. His eyes glittered with blistering lust.
"Good girl," he whispered harshly.
The tip of the crop skimmed back down my body, gliding between my breasts and then to my belly, before finally coming to rest on my pussy. He caressed it across my vulva and my inner thighs as I shuddered all over. He pulled the crop away and moved to my left side, his free hand coming to rest firmly on my left hip.
He placed the shaft of the crop across the middle my ass, then slid it up to the top and down again to the backs of my knees. He repeated the motions, gradually shortening the distance until the crop stilled completely on the lower half of my buttocks. Tense anticipation fell heavy across the room. Fear skittered through me as I waited for what came next, my body shaking uncontrollably.
"I'm starting out gently, beautiful," he said reassuringly. "I'll build slowly and stop to check in with you along the way. Tell me your safeword."
"B...bourbon, sir," I answered waveringly.
The first strike was painless and feather soft, and was followed by more mere seconds apart. He spread them in rhythmic taps across the skin of both buttocks. He covered every inch before returning to where he started, then he began again, the blows building in strength this round.
After that, he stopped and pressed his warm hard body against my back. His arms snaked around me as he hugged me close, making me feel safe and protected. His left hand slid softly down my belly as his lips fell upon my neck in an open mouth kiss that seared into me. His fingertips moved down to brush across my sex, and I shivered and moaned with desire as he found me wet and slick already.
"More?" he asked against my skin in a tone that said he already knew my answer.
"Please, sir."
"Very well."
He began again, slowly and softly, but this time spreading them further across my body, first down to my thighs and back up to my shoulder blades. It didn't hurt, but it started doing amazing things to me. Pleasure oozed through my entire body, and I sighed blissfully. The soft strikes moved back down to my buttocks. And then he suddenly struck my ass with two more forceful strokes. Snap, snap. I jumped and gasped at the slight sting, and his free hand rubbed soothingly along my hip.
"Mmm..." he murmured into my ear as he slid his hand down to my pussy again. His fingers found me completely soaked now. "You liked that, didn't you?" He fingered my clit, and the only reply I was capable of was a needy whimper as electric tingles of pleasure zipped through me. "Good," he growled out harshly. "Now it's time for more." Heated threat oozed through his sexy husky voice. Oh shit. Fear streaked through me leaving my heart pounding yet again.
Snap. I jerked and gasped as a sharp sting blossomed in the middle of my right ass cheek. Snap. A second sting on my left. Snap. Now the lower right. Snap. Then the left. I was panting now as I jerked on the chains holding my arms up, instinctively wanting to cover my ass but unable to move as I rose up on my toes. His palm rubbed soothing circles across my entire buttocks, banishing the pain and leaving warm liquid heat in its wake. Blissful pleasure hit me in a wave. I began to tremble from the dichotomous sensations. Holy crap, I loved it.
"Gareth," I whimpered out shakily. "More."
One, two, three, four. He did it again, this time the sting sharper on my oversensitive flesh, but the pleasure as he rubbed the sting away was twofold and totally worth the pain. Then his fingers found my clit with firm pressure, and he rubbed and circled with expert skill.
"Come, baby," he growled in my ear. "Come for me now."
My release exploded in an instant, igniting my entire body in a conflagration of hot searing bliss. Wow, it was incredible and my cry of pleasure echoed through the massive penthouse. I vaguely heard Gareth's accompanying growl of satisfaction. I fell limp in my restraints as my legs gave out. He caught me, quickly releasing the cuffs and lowering me to the mat.
Before I could even fully recover he was towering over me, his face a mask of raw feral lust as he shoved his jeans and boxer briefs down. His cock sprang free, and it was so hard now that the tip was purple and weeping pre-cum. His eyes burned black as he knelt near my feet. He grabbed my knees in an iron grip and jerked me across the mat to him, pushing my knees apart to hover over me. He growled as his dick unerringly found my pussy and plunged into me with a sudden powerful thrust of his hips. I was so wet and slick that he sank balls deep into me in an instant, sliding home and sending a jolt of electricity through me. I was so full, and the sudden almost painful penetration felt so good, so right.
"Gar-" I tried to moan, but he began pounding into me, instantly taking my breath away and rendering speech impossible. The dark and primal animal inside him had been unleashed, and I gave in to its dominion and reveled in it.
He snarled and cursed violently, his hard deep thrusts shoving me across the mat as he pursued our release with a relentless pace. All I could do was wrap my legs around Gareth's waist and grip his shoulders tight as I held on for dear life. My orgasm hit me like an avalanche, crushing down and smothering out everything but this man and where our bodies were joined as it laid waste to me. I screamed and screamed, my voice growing hoarse as he sent me soaring on and on, holding me there on the cusp of unconsciousness. When I began to recover, her sent me flying again.
"Malory, oh fuck, Malory," he gritted out through clenched teeth, his glowing black eyes fixed on mine in a haze of mindless pleasure and something else, something deeper and meaningful. "I love...I love..." He trailed off, his eyes rolling back in his head as he thrust into me once more, so hard and so damn deep that it almost hurt and pushed me down into the foam mat. He suddenly stilled, then roared as his entire body began spasming above me. His cock swelled and started jerking inside me as jet after jet of his seed exploded violently into me as he came. I followed close behind, my scream joining his as we came together in a heated rush of senseless euphoria before Gareth limply collapsed on top of me, panting and sweating against me.
When I finally came to my senses, I only had one coherent thought. Holy crap, did Gareth almost just say he loves me? The idea filled me with terror and a then surprising inkling of hope I never expected that told me what I needed to do next. Despite my fear, I needed to gather my courage and find out if I was right. I just hoped I wasn't wrong, because if the love I now could admit I felt for him was unrequited, it would rip me apart.
25
GARETH
I lifted my head, feeling perfectly wrecked and annihilated by my orgasm, and pressed a hard grateful kiss to Malory's mouth. I moaned at the sunshine and light of her big soft lips, and the feel of her warm naked body under me. Goddamn, she was so perfect and amazing. My hips thrust unconsciously against hers, my still semi-hard cock managing to pull a small whimper out of her.
"Gareth," she said softly with a contented smile on her face after I pulled my mouth away.
"Malory," I replied warmly, rubbing my nose against hers and grinning back at her. "My good girl," I added in a whisper and kissed her again, thrusting my tongue between her luscious lips, tasting and owning ever inch of her decadent mouth. I never wanted to stop. She was mine, and I never wanted to let her go. I pulled away and opened my mouth to speak, then snapped it shut when I realized how close I almost came to saying those three words again. No. No, no, no. I wasn't going there. I couldn't. I wouldn't. Icy fear flooded my veins, extinguishing the warmth
in my heart.
I abruptly rolled away from Malory, ignoring the bereft feeling of not touching her in favor of the distance that I needed to calm my emotions and my racing pulse. Fuck, I needed some space to get a grip. I stood and reached down toward Malory.
"Let's get you cleaned up, baby," I told her with a smile I hoped didn't look forced.
She grinned and took my hand. "Are we going to shower together?" she asked hopefully as I pulled her to her feet.
"I have to take Reggie out," I said. "You go ahead, beautiful." I wanted to shower with her, I really did, but right now I didn't trust myself not to say things I couldn't possibly mean.
"Okay." Disappointment fell across her face, and guilt twinged inside me.
"How are your arms?" I asked to change the subject. "Do they hurt?"
She shook her head. "They're fine."
"Turn around," I spun her so I could check her backside.
I wanted to make sure she didn't have any sore spots that needed attention. I was very good with a crop, but I always made sure my subs were injury free. I looked at her buttocks. Her cheeks were a beautiful bright red, but I didn't see any welts or bruising. Good. I'd given her an easy whipping for her first time to feel her out, and I was so happy she enjoyed it. Unable to help myself, I ran a hand across her ass, relishing the hiss of pain and the soft moan that Malory let out from my touch on her tender and oversensitive flesh. My dick twitched. Okay, I needed to stop that before I got carried away. I couldn't risk blurting out something stupid in the heat of passion like I almost did moments ago.
"Come on, beautiful," I said.
I took her hand again to lead her upstairs and into my bedroom. She walked ahead of me, and threw a warm affectionate smile over her shoulder as she disappeared into my bathroom. It hit me like a blow to my heart that was quickly chased by fear. I shook it away and went to pull out some athletic pants, a T-shirt, and some socks from my dresser, then grabbed my athletic shoes. My hands were shaking as I dressed. I chose to ignore it. I headed downstairs just as the shower turned on, and I also ignored the part of me that said I belonged in that shower with the woman I lo-.
No. I wasn't going there, goddamn it. No.
I stepped off the stairs onto the first floor, and Reggie jumped up off his dog bed and rushed over to me. He knew to stay away when I played with a woman, and went to his bed without even being told now. He was a good boy. He followed me to the door with a few worried whines, nosing at me while I pulled my coat on and grabbed his leash. Fuck me, I was all twisted up inside, and he could tell.
Reggie and I took the elevator downstairs and then went outside. It was cold out now, the hint of spring we'd had earlier in the day long gone to be replaced by a biting wind that seeped in through my coat. I hunched deeper into my collar as I walked, hoping Reggie didn't mess around taking care of business like he sometimes did.
My mind wandered to thoughts of my ex-wife as we walked. All these feelings I was having for Malory brought back memories of the first and last woman I'd said those three little but powerful words to. I'd been so young and naive back then. I thought those words meant something. I thought they had the power to make me happy and last my whole life. I'd been wrong. In the end, all they brought me were hate and heartbreak and unhappiness.
My marriage had nearly destroyed me, and those three words were dangerous and threatening to me now. They represented a past that still haunted me, still defined me whether I liked it to or not. I'd thought it was too soon to say them to Malory, but now I knew differently. I couldn't risk saying them to anyone again, even though I was sure it put an expiration date on this thing between Malory and me that I'd desperately longed to last. Now I knew it couldn't. Once she realized I couldn't give her what she needed, couldn't give her more, she'd be gone. I'd take what I could get as long as it lasted, until she wanted more than I was capable of, and it imploded. Then I'd be alone again, just like I was destined to be all along.
I was pulled from my dark depressing thoughts on the way back to my building, when Reggie jerked to a halt and began growling frighteningly, his body rigid and on alert. He stared across the street intently as he barked and snarled viciously. I stopped to look in that direction, and saw nothing but a few parked cars bathed by the street lights. I frowned, wondering what had gotten into him. Maybe he was just hyper-alert after defending Jared from that mugger yesterday.
I shook my head. Whatever. It was too cold outside to deal with right now. "Come on, Reg," I snapped out irritably. "Let's go." I continued walking, popping the leash a few times to coax him into reluctantly following.
Once I was back inside, I spent the elevator ride trying to banish my depressing moody bullshit. Malory didn't need to see me like this and start asking questions. She wouldn't like the answers. I stepped inside and took off my coat before heading up to my room.
I walked in to see Malory coming out of the bathroom, completely at ease being naked in front of me with her damp flaming hair cascading down across her freckled shoulders. Her cheeks and chest were flushed from the heat of her shower, and her perfect pink nipples were hard and jutting out. She looked just like she did when she was aroused. Goddamn, she was so beautiful and sexy. I stood staring at her like an imbecile as she smiled smugly at my reaction.
"You better hurry up and shower so we can get dirty again," she said suggestively. That sounded like a great way to get out of this funk. I just had to keep my damn mouth shut this time when I was tempted to say something idiotic.
"Very well," I replied with a roguish grin. I went to sit on the bed and started pulling off my shoes.
Malory walked over and crawled up onto the bed. I stole a glance at her still reddened ass before she slid under the blankets. She winced a little as she sat down, then leaned back against the headboard and watched me. Her expression suddenly turning pensive and troubled as I stood to pull off my shirt.
"What's wrong, beautiful?" I asked, worried that maybe I'd somehow hurt her when we played earlier.
"I...I want to ask you something, but I'm afraid," she whispered.
"You can ask me anything, Malory," I reassured her as I stepped closer.
"Um...while...uh...while we were having sex..." She trailed off and looked away for a second, took a deep breath and faced me again with a serious expression. "I thought I heard you start to say something...about...about how you feel about me."
Fuck me. Not now. I felt my face go slack. I wasn't ready for this to end yet. Goddamn it. "I don't know what you're talking about," I lied as panic hit me hard, my tone clipped and irritated.
She blinked rapidly with a perplexed expression. "But...but I thought I heard-"
"No," I cut in harsher than I intended, desperate to shut this conversation down, "you didn't."
She jerked her head back in surprise as pain flooded her eyes. "I know what I heard," she said defensively. "You said-"
"I was caught in the moment babbling out nonsense," I interjected before she could say those words I'd never be able to say. "You must have heard what you wanted to hear."
She stared at me, her lower lip beginning to tremble and her eyes glistening with tears before they widened suddenly in comprehension. "Is this because of her? Your ex-wife?" she asked softly. "Is that why you're afraid to say it?"
She was too perceptive for her own good, could read me like a goddamn book and cut right to truth I didn't want to hear. I felt like a trapped animal backed into a corner with no way out. I clenched my hands into fists in desperation, my nails digging into my palms painfully, and lashed out in a panic.
"You're delusional. I can't be afraid to say something I never fucking intended to say in the first place, Malory," I snarled out without thinking. She jerked back with a gasp. I hardened my gaze. "This conversation is over." My tone was clipped and commanding. "Go to sleep." I turned and walked into the bathroom as she began to sob softly. I closed and locked the door behind me, and tried not to think about the hurt expression that I just put on he
r beautiful face.
I turned on the shower and pulled off my clothes. I stepped in under the cascade of hot water and mindlessly washed my body in a numb haze. After I rinsed off, I just stood there for several long moments with the spray pounding down on my back with my eyes closed and my mind blank, until a sudden massive wave of guilt hit me like a goddamn blow. In my panic, I'd let the asshole in me lash out at my poor Malory. I hurt her and made her cry again. All I could think of were the very real similarities between this situation and the way I treated Viv the last time I saw her before she died. I never got a chance to apologize, never got a chance to make it right. What the fuck had I done?
I lurched forward, leaning against the wall with a forearm as I pressed my forehead against the cold hard tile. "Fuck," I rasped out harshly as I realized I'd done what I feared all along. I'd let her see the asshole I really was, and now she knew the truth. There probably wasn't enough groveling in the world to fix this, but I had to try. Maybe if I could somehow deflect her away from those three words I couldn't say, I'd be able to salvage this before it was too late. I wasn't ready for this to end. I wasn't ready to be alone again just yet. Those thoughts were enough of an impetus to get me moving.
I shoved myself away from the wall and turned off the shower. I grabbed a towel as I stepped out and hurriedly dried myself off. I flung the wet towel on the floor and hurried out the door into my bedroom. I jerked to a halt as I stared at the now empty bed. I opened my mouth to call out Malory's name just as a sudden loud bang echoed through my penthouse. My eyes flew wide in horrified realization. It was the front door being slammed shut. Reggie began barking in a high-pitched and frenzied tone.
Dark Dominion: Dangerous Desire Book 1 Page 31
