by Abby Klein
To Jenson,
Super baby and future prankster!
Love,
A.K.
TITLE PAGE
DEDICATION
CHAPTER 1: March 31
CHAPTER 2: Ideas, Anyone?
CHAPTER 3: Suzie the Snoop
CHAPTER 4: Kasey and Kelly’s Pranks
CHAPTER 5: The Plan
CHAPTER 6: The Night Before
CHAPTER 7: April Fools’ Day: Part 1
CHAPTER 8: April Fools’ Day: Part 2
Freddy’s Fun Pages
FREDDY’S TOP TEN APRIL FOOLS’ DAY PRANKS
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
OTHER STORIES BY ABBY KLEIN
ALSO AVAILABLE
COPYRIGHT
I have a problem. A really, really big problem. Tomorrow is April Fools’ Day, and I don’t know any good tricks to play on my friends and family.
Let me tell you about it.
“Tomorrow is a new month,” said my teacher, Miss Clark. “Does anybody know what month starts tomorrow?”
“I do! I do!” Chloe squealed, waving her mint-green fingernails in the air. “Tomorrow is April first.”
“That’s correct,” said Miss Clark, “and it’s a special day.”
“I know it is,” Chloe continued. “It’s the day I get a new manicure and change the color of my nail polish.”
“Is she kidding?” Josh whispered.
“I wish,” Jessie whispered back. “Unfortunately, she’s not. She’s for real.”
“On the first day of every month,” Chloe was telling Miss Clark, “I go to the nail salon and get my nails painted a different color.”
“Unbelievable,” Josh mumbled, shaking his head.
“For the month of March, I painted my nails green for Saint Patrick’s Day,” Chloe said. “I’m not sure yet what color I’ll paint my nails for April. Easter is in April, so I’ll probably paint them a pretty pastel color. Maybe lavender or —”
“No one cares!” Max interrupted loudly.
Chloe stopped talking about her nails and turned to Max. “What did you say?”
“I said, ‘No one cares!’” Max barked.
“Says who?” Chloe demanded.
“Says everyone in this room,” said Max.
“That’s not true,” said Chloe.
“Yes, it is,” said Max. “Ask anyone.”
“Okay, I will.” Chloe turned to Josh and smiled sweetly. “Josh, you care what color I paint my nails, right?”
I poked Josh in the side. “Now you’re in trouble,” I whispered.
Josh stammered, “I, uh — I, uh —”
Just then Miss Clark interrupted him. “Chloe, your nails are very pretty, but that is not what I was talking about when I said that tomorrow is a special day.”
“Whew, that was a close one,” I whispered to Josh. “Nice save by Miss Clark.”
Josh nodded, looking relieved.
“I know why tomorrow is special,” said Jessie.
“Great!” said Miss Clark. “Tell the class.”
“Tomorrow is April Fools’ Day.”
Max jumped out of his seat and pumped his fist in the air. “I love April Fools’ Day! It’s the best day ever.”
“Have you ever played any April Fools’ tricks on anyone?” asked Miss Clark.
“It doesn’t have to be April Fools’ for him to play tricks on people,” I whispered to Josh. “He’s the biggest bully in the whole second grade. He does mean things to kids all the time.”
“Oh yeah,” said Max, snickering. “I’ve done some great tricks on April Fools’ Day.”
“Like what?” asked Miss Clark.
“Last year I put some salt in Freddy’s water bottle when he wasn’t looking. You should have seen his face when he took a sip of water! Ha, ha, ha, ha!”
“Did he really do that to you?” Josh asked.
“Yep.” I nodded. “He thought it was hilarious.”
“I remember that,” said Chloe. “That wasn’t very funny.”
“Yes, it was,” said Max. “It was really funny!”
“Well, I didn’t think so,” said Chloe. “You’re just a big meanie.”
“You’d better be careful, or I just might play a trick on you this year,” said Max.
“Oh no you wouldn’t,” said Chloe.
“Oh yes I would.”
“No you wouldn’t.”
“Yes I would,” Max said, grinning. “I’m thinking of some good ones right now.”
“Miss Clark! Miss Clark!” Chloe whined. “Max is going to play a trick on me.”
“He’s just saying that to annoy you,” said Miss Clark. “Ignore him.”
“Have you ever played tricks on anyone, Miss Clark?” Jessie asked.
“Yes, I have, Jessie,” said Miss Clark.
“Wow! She is the coolest teacher ever,” Josh said.
“I like April Fools’ Day pranks,” Miss Clark said, “but I prefer the kind that are funny and harmless.”
“What’s one of your favorite tricks?” Jessie asked.
Miss Clark smiled. “I remember, one time when I was a kid, I put a blown-up balloon in the toilet and shut the lid. When my sister went to go to the bathroom, she opened the lid, and surprise … a balloon floated up into her face. She screamed, and I laughed hysterically. It was so funny!”
“That’s a good one,” Jessie said.
“I should try that on my sister,” I said.
“Oh, I have another good one,” Max said. “You take the salt out of your saltshaker and replace it with sugar. Then when your mom goes to put salt on her eggs in the morning, she’s actually putting sugar on them! Her eggs taste really sweet and disgusting!” Max was rolling with laughter.
“That’s an old one,” Josh said. “I’ve heard that before. That’s not very original.”
Max stopped laughing and glared at Josh.
“Uh-oh,” I said. “He’s giving you the evil eye.”
“Whatever,” said Josh. “He can give me the evil eye all he wants. He doesn’t scare me. You’ve got to stop being so afraid of him, Freddy.”
“I thought it would be fun to celebrate April Fools’ Day tomorrow by making it Backwards Day,” said Miss Clark.
“Backwards Day? What’s that?” asked Jessie.
“We wear our clothes backwards,” said Miss Clark.
“What do you mean?” Chloe asked.
“You just put everything on backwards,” Jessie said.
“That’s right,” said Miss Clark. “You put your shirt, pants, and even your underwear on the wrong way. You’ll have to keep your shoes on straight, though, or you won’t be able to walk!”
“I don’t think I can do that,” said Chloe, “because I have to wear a dress.”
“Sure you can,” Miss Clark told her. “You turn the dress around and wear the zipper in the front.”
Chloe frowned. “That doesn’t sound very fun.”
“Just try it,” said Miss Clark. “You’ll see. It will be lots of fun.”
“With your undies on backwards, it will be harder to give you a wedgie,” Max whispered to me. “But I’ll come up with some other good tricks. Better watch out.”
I gulped.
“No, you’d better watch out,” said Josh. “We’ll have some good tricks of our own. Right, Freddy?”
I nodded and smiled weakly. “Right.”
That afternoon on the bus ride home Josh said, “So, Freddy, we have to come up with something really good for tomorrow.”
“What are you guys talking about?” said my other best friend, Robbie.
“Tomorrow is April Fools’ Day,” said Josh.
“Oh yeah, I almost forgot,” said Robbie. “Good thing you guys reminded me.”
&
nbsp; “We have to come up with a good trick to play on Max,” said Josh.
“On Max?” Robbie said a bit too loudly.
“Hey, you wimps,” Max said, standing up in his seat. “Did one of you just call my name?”
“Uh-oh,” I whispered.
“No,” said Josh. “Maybe you should have your hearing checked.”
“Good one,” Robbie whispered.
“No standing up in the bus!” the bus driver yelled over his shoulder. “Sit down, Max.”
Max flopped back down in his seat.
“Are you really going to play a trick on Max?” Robbie asked.
“Yeah, why not?” asked Josh.
“Because he’s the biggest bully in the whole second grade,” said Robbie. “Everyone is afraid of him.”
“Well, I’m not,” said Josh. “He’s always playing tricks on kids. Someone should play a trick on him. Let’s see how he likes it.”
Robbie turned to me. “You’re going to do this, too, Freddy?”
“Of course he is!” said Josh.
I nodded slowly.
“He played a trick on Freddy last year, so why shouldn’t Freddy play a trick on him this year?”
“He did?” said Robbie.
“Yeah, remember? He put salt in my water bottle.”
“Oh yeah,” Robbie said chuckling. “How could I forget? You made the funniest face when you took that first sip!”
I scrunched up my nose.
“And then you spit it out all over your desk,” said Robbie.
“You did?” said Josh. “I wish I had been there to see that!”
“It was disgusting,” I said. “Have you ever tasted salt water?”
“Lots of times,” said Josh.
“You have?” said Robbie.
“When I went surfing in California, I used to swallow a lot of salt water by accident. It doesn’t taste good.”
“I’ve never been to the beach,” said Robbie. “I’ve only gone swimming in pools, and pool water is pretty disgusting, too!”
“I think I swallowed, like, half the pool the last time I went swimming,” I said, laughing.
“This summer I’m going to have to teach you to be a better swimmer,” said Josh.
“Cool,” I said.
“So, do you guys know what trick you’re going to play on Max?” asked Robbie.
“Nope,” said Josh. “Got any good ideas?”
“Hmmm … let’s see,” said Robbie. “You could do something with fake bugs.”
“Like what?” I said.
“Like sneak one into his sandwich at lunchtime, so when he goes to take a bite, he gets a bug in his mouth.”
I laughed. “That could be good,” I said.
“Nah,” said Josh. “We need something better.”
“But remember we played that bug trick on Chloe?” I said. “We put that fake spider in her cubby, and she freaked out.”
“But that’s Chloe,” said Josh. “She’s afraid of everything.”
“Good point,” said Robbie.
“Max is not afraid of bugs,” Josh continued. “He’s not going to freak out because we put a plastic bug in his sandwich.”
“I guess you’re right.” I sighed.
“Oh, I just thought of a good one,” said Josh.
“What?” I said.
“Have you ever dropped a can of soda on the ground by accident right before you were going to open it?”
“I did once,” said Robbie.
“And what happened when you went to open it?” said Josh.
“The whole thing exploded in my face,” Robbie said, laughing.
“Really?” I said.
“Really. My hair was dripping with soda, and my shirt was soaked!”
“Same thing happened to me,” said Josh.
“I wonder why that happens,” I said.
“It’s because of the carbon dioxide,” Robbie said.
“The what?” said Josh.
“The carbon dioxide. It’s what makes soda bubbly. Carbon dioxide is a gas that usually sits at the top of the can, but if you shake the can, the carbon dioxide gets mixed around with the liquid soda below it. Because the gas is not sitting by itself at the top of the can anymore, when you open it, the bubbles come rushing out from all different parts of the container, making the liquid soda explode in your face!”
“Thank you, Einstein,” I said.
“What are you?” said Josh. “Some kind of science genius?”
“Yes, he is,” I said. “He is like a walking encyclopedia of science.”
“Wow! I’m impressed,” said Josh.
“I just really like science,” Robbie said, smiling.
“There’s only one problem with that prank,” I said.
“What?” said Josh.
“We’re not allowed to have soda at school.”
“Shoot,” said Josh. “I would have loved to see soda explode in Max Sellars’s face.”
“That would have been awesome,” I said, “but we’ll have to think of something else.”
“I don’t really have any more ideas,” Josh said.
“Me either,” said Robbie.
“And we don’t have a lot of time,” said Josh. “April Fools’ is tomorrow!”
“I just got a great idea!” I said suddenly.
“Awesome! What is it?” asked Josh.
“I have twin cousins named Kasey and Kelly. People call them Double Trouble because they are always getting into trouble. I know they’ll have some really good April Fools’ Day tricks. I’ll call them as soon as I get home and see what ideas they have. Then why don’t you come over, and we can make a plan.”
“I’ll just drop off my backpack at home and come over to your house,” said Josh.
“Me, too,” said Robbie.
“Great! See you guys in about half an hour,” I said as the bus pulled up in front of my house.
“You’d better be careful tomorrow,” Max said as I passed by his seat, getting off the bus. “You never know what might happen.”
No, you’d better be careful, I thought to myself, and smiled.
“Mom, I’m home!” I yelled as I kicked the front door closed behind me and dropped my backpack on the floor.
“Freddy, how many times have I told you to close the door with your hands, not your feet?”
“Sorry, Mom. I just forget.”
“Using your foot leaves dirty shoe prints on the door. Now I have to go get something to clean that up.”
My mom is such a neat freak. She is always cleaning something. She walked into the laundry room to get a sponge and some cleaner. I followed her in there. “Hey, Mom, can I have Kelly and Kasey’s phone number?”
She grabbed what she needed and headed back to the front door. I went with her.
“Your cousins? Why do you want their phone number?”
“Because, um … because … I need their advice for a project at school.”
“Well, that’s nice,” my mom said, scrubbing my shoe print off the door. Just then the door flung open, and my mom went flying backwards.
“Mom! Are you okay?” my sister, Suzie, asked.
“Yes, honey, I’m fine. You just took me by surprise.”
“I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were behind the door. What were you doing there, anyway?”
“Trying to clean some muddy shoe prints left by your brother.”
“So, Mom, can I have their number?” I asked again.
“Whose number?” said Suzie.
“Kasey and Kelly’s number.”
“Why do you want their phone number?”
“None of your beeswax,” I said.
“Mom, Freddy must be up to something naughty if he won’t tell me why he wants their number.”
I glared at Suzie.
“He’s not up to anything naughty,” my mom said. “He just wants their phone number so he can get their help with a project for school.”
“Really?” said Suzie, staring r
ight at me. “What kind of project?”
“It’s a secret,” I said. “If I told you, it would ruin the surprise.”
“This whole thing sounds really fishy to me,” said Suzie. “Doesn’t it, Mom?”
“Oh, Suzie, leave your brother alone. I think it’s nice that he wants to talk to his cousins.”
“Thanks, Mom,” I said.
My mom finished wiping the door and went to put the cleaning supplies away.
“I know you’re up to something,” Suzie said. “Don’t think I won’t find out.”
“Whatever,” I said, and walked into the kitchen.
My mom came in and picked up the phone. “Should I dial your cousins’ number for you, Freddy?”
“Uh, actually, could you just write it down on a piece of paper for me? I want to call them myself.”
“Sure, honey,” my mom said.
She wrote the number down and handed it to me along with the phone. I started to head upstairs.
“Where are you going?” Suzie called after me.
“To my room. Is that okay with you?”
“See, Mom,” said Suzie. “Freddy must be up to something if he’s calling them from his room.”
“He just wants some privacy,” said my mom. “He said it was a surprise, so he doesn’t want us to hear the conversation.”
As I got to the top of the stairs, I could hear footsteps behind me. I turned around to see Suzie following me.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Just going up to my room, if that’s okay with you,” she said. “I need to get something.”
“I think you’re following me.”
“Really?”
“Really. You’re being a snoop. You always have to know everyone else’s business.”
“That’s not true,” Suzie said.
“Yes, it is. Why don’t you mind your own business for once?” I said as I went into my room and slammed the door.
“You are so annoying!” Suzie yelled through my door. “I was just going to my own room!”
I waited a few seconds, and then I heard Suzie slam her bedroom door shut.
She thinks I’m so stupid that I don’t know her little tricks, I thought to myself. She shut her door so I would think she went into her room. I bet she is still standing right out in the hallway with her ear pressed up against my door, trying to hear my phone call.
