He was trying to decide how best to answer when they were interrupted by a cell phone chime. Danny pulled his from his pocket and, after reading the message on the screen, typed out a quick reply. “Change of plans, big brother,” he said with a grin. “Marie had to cancel on the meeting and Bree didn’t want to go alone. So I get to spend the evening with my wife.”
Immediately, Danny rose from his chair and was halfway through the door when Michael called out to him. Danny stopped to look back. “Yeah?”
For a split second he considered asking Danny to go and get his paperwork and tear it to shreds. But really, what was the point?
“Have a good night,” he said instead. “Tell Bree I said hello.”
“Will do. And you,” Danny said, pointing a figure at him, “go spend time with Kacie before she leaves. If you don’t you’ll regret it.” Then he gave two quick taps to the doorjamb with his knuckles before disappearing down the hallway.
Michael leaned heavily on his elbows. If Danny was in for another four years, then that meant he was in for another four. He never should have told Kacie about the possibility of him getting out in a matter of months. She was willing to put up with the military thing for maybe another year, but no way would she ever agree to four years—not after the game her ex played. So in one fell swoop, he’d lost his freedom to choose and he’d lost his girl, too.
Unless . . .
Once again, his little brother was right. He could sit here and mope about Kacie leaving or he could do something to make her stay.
Kacie stood in front of her pantry, pulling items from each shelf and deciding whether or not the contents were worth keeping. She gave a box of cereal a shake, and when she didn’t hear anything, she opened the top and peered inside. Empty. Which was surprising because she was pretty sure she hadn’t eaten this variety of cereal in the past few months. Her guess? Sam. Her little sister had a bad habit of putting empty things back in the refrigerator, or pantry, or wherever, because she was too lazy to throw them away.
This chore, along with clearing out the refrigerator, was the last big job she had to do before she moved. Everything she didn’t need over the next few days was already packed in labeled boxes that now overtook her living room. Anything not packed had to fit into one large suitcase, so when the movers arrived all she had to do was toss those last few items in her car.
Although she was nervous about moving to a new city where she knew no one, and starting a demanding residency and fellowship, she was excited, too. Especially since the door had been left open for Michael to possibly join her in the coming months. At the very least, he would be able to visit her during the next year.
She was just about to text him when she heard heavy boot steps coming up her front porch. Immediately, she ran to the door and yanked it open, before he even had a chance to ring the bell. “Speak of the devil.”
Michael smiled and immediately reached for her, wrapping his arms about her waist and lifting her until her feet were well off the ground. To make things easier, she wrapped her legs around him and burrowed her face beneath the collar of his jacket so she could press a kiss to his neck. He’d come straight from work and smelled of starch since he was still wearing his ACUs.
Without saying a word he walked the two of them inside and nudged the door shut behind them, then continued on to her bedroom where he stripped her bare and made love to her before ever saying hello.
But as she lay there next to him, looking into those deep dark eyes and raking her fingertips through his hair, she knew just by looking at him what he was feeling. Because she was feeling it, too.
He took hold of her wrist, brought it to his mouth, and pressed a kiss to her pulse. “How was your day?” he asked.
“Fine. Dull. Spent most of the day scheduling utility shutoffs and setting up connections for my place in Durham. How was yours?”
She was taken by surprise when he dropped her hand and pushed himself up to sitting, his back leaning against the headboard. “To be honest, pretty shitty. Didn’t get much of anything accomplished. It’s hard for me to concentrate knowing you’re leaving at the end of the week.”
Her heart fluttered. It was the closest thing to a declaration he’d offered.
She sat up as well and dragged her finger along the edge of his jaw. “The long-distance thing won’t be forever.” And then she smiled, so wide it made her face hurt. “Besides, we’ll have phone sex to keep us warm at night.”
But the smile on his face was hardly a smile at all. Only one corner of his mouth lifted and even then it only rose up halfway at best. She skimmed her palm up his arm to his shoulder and back down again, trying her best to soothe him. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
Michael sighed, slightly shaking his head like even he couldn’t believe what he was about to say. “Danny stopped by my office tonight. Right after he turned in his reenlistment papers.”
He didn’t say another word. Didn’t need to.
The way he looked at her she already knew what was coming next. Her stomach twisted and knotted and suddenly it was difficult to breathe.
She slid off the bed, gathered her clothing from the floor, and made a beeline for the bathroom so she could have a moment to herself. As she closed the door behind her, she let herself cry. Her heart was too involved now; a few months with Michael, and she’d grown closer to him than any other man she’d previously been with.
She knew they weren’t done yet. That Michael could still change his mind.
All she could do was pray for the best.
She steadied herself, putting on her clothes, ready to face him and their uncertain future. She stepped out into the hall and noticed him sitting in the living room. Like her, he’d also dressed and was in the process of lacing up his combat boots.
If ever there was a bad sign.
She made her way down the hall and took a seat on the end of the sofa, sitting on the rolled arm and tucking her toes beneath the cushion. “So your brother signed up for four more years. Did you sign up for four more as well?”
Michael rested his elbows on his knees, his fingers laced together. “I haven’t done anything yet, but that’s the plan. I wanted to talk to you first.”
Inside she felt a tiny flicker of hope. The fact he was asking her opinion, that he was including her in such a life altering decision, meant something. Didn’t it?
“Well, then.” She pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “If you want my advice, I suggest you do what’s right for you. I know you promised your mother you’d watch over your brother, but that was twenty-five years ago. You’re not little boys anymore. You need to live your own life. And you can’t do that if you’re babysitting your little brother for the rest of your life.”
His expression hardened. “I would hardly call it babysitting.”
She took a deep breath, trying to calm the jumble of nerves inside her. “You’re right. I apologize. But the fact remains, you need to do what’s best for you. Right now you’re living a life of obligations. You do your job because you have to, not because you want to.”
“True. But having the right person by my side would make everything better.” He stared at her with those intense blue eyes. “And that person is you.”
Kacie shook her head. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the past year, it’s that no one person can make you happy. At least not long term. You have to find that happiness for yourself. In yourself.”
“But I’m happy enough where I’m at right now. This past month is proof of it. And a job doesn’t have to be everything. If I have my family, my brother, and if I have you, then it will be just fine.”
Needing to put distance between them, she climbed off the sofa and moved to the other side of the room. Feeling a sudden chill, she wrapped her arms around her middle. “I told you from the beginning I wouldn’t get involved with another military guy. I can’t do it again.”
“News flash, Kacie, you already are,” he said, his tone sarcastic
and borderline cruel. “All I’m asking you to do is stay here with me. Don’t go to Durham. All your things are packed—just move them in with me. Or if you want, we can find a new place to call our own.”
Kacie gasped. Tears welled in her eyes, blurring her vision. “You’re just like him,” she whispered.
“You’re comparing what we have to how that asshole used you? Led you on? I wouldn’t do any of that!”
“What you’re asking me to do, put my dreams on hold, my career on hold, all so everything in your life remains neatly in place? That is something he would’ve asked. Did ask actually.”
He threw his hands in the air, incredulous. “A job can’t be your whole life, Kacie. Believe me.”
“I realize that!” She pounded her fist against her chest. “But I can’t be with someone who wants me to give up everything I’ve worked for just to be with them. I can’t put my life on hold until that person decides I may or may not be what they want.”
He rose from the sofa. “Okay, then. Let me make it perfectly clear. I want you with me. I want you to—”
“No!” she shouted, cutting him off with a wave of her hand. “Do not say another word. Don’t even think about proposing something else in order to get me to stay.” The tears she’d fought to control spilled over onto her cheeks and she roughly swiped them away with the palm of her hand. “That’s nothing but straight-up manipulation, Michael, and I wouldn’t have thought you were capable of it. But I guess when you’re desperate to have everything your way, you’ll do or say just about anything.”
He crossed over to her, invading her personal space. “Kacie . . .”
She sidestepped him and marched to the front door, pulling it open. “You need to leave.”
“Kace . . .”
“Just go, Michael.”
She couldn’t force herself to look at him. For what felt like an eternity, they waged this standoff. Him likely watching her, while she stared at the floor. Finally, his combat boots pounded across the wood floors as he made his way toward the door, but paused momentarily in front of her. Still she didn’t look up. Couldn’t look up. Instead, she watched as his neatly tied boots walked past her, through the door, and out of her life.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Michael placed the ball on the tee and stepped back to enjoy the view. Long expanses of manicured grass. Towering trees. Additional bursts of color in the form of blooming shrubs lining either side of the fairway.
He hadn’t stepped on a golf course since that Saturday afternoon Kacie called him out of the blue, asking him for a ride home from the bridal shop. But while out for his morning run he decided today would be a good day to break out his clubs, take out his frustrations on a little white ball, and maybe, just maybe, get her out of his head for a few hours.
After a couple practice swings, Michael addressed his ball, adjusted his grip one final time, drew back his club, and gave it his all. But the moment his club struck the ball, he knew it was going to be an ugly shot. Sure enough, it sailed right, slicing far off the fairway and into the trees.
He gritted his teeth and swore under his breath.
“I heard wood on that one but didn’t see it come down,” came a voice from just off the tee box.
He wasn’t sure which of the three men he was playing with said it since the moment he turned around they all stopped talking. With shoulders slumped and head hanging, he fought the urge to wrap his fucking driver around the closest tree, grab his shit, and leave.
But his father didn’t raise a quitter, so he’d tough it out.
“Sorry about that.” He leaned over, picked up his broken tee, and tamped down the divot. “I haven’t touched my clubs in a few months. Guess I’m rustier than I thought.”
“Take a mulligan, kid,” said the round white-haired gentleman holding a cigar between his gloved fingers. “We can turn our backs and pretend we didn’t see you take one if it makes you feel better.”
The other two men with him laughed and Michael decided to laugh along, because really, what choice did he have at that point?
Six months ago, everything in his life was fine. Just fine. And now, everything was total shit. His golf game. His career. His love life. It was all pure shit, and he had no one to blame but himself.
When his phone vibrated in his pocket, he’d never been so thankful for a distraction from his golf game. Even better when the group text message from Lucky, announcing the early-morning birth of Baby James and an invite to visit, came through. While he wasn’t one to rush right on over to ooh and aah over a newborn, this one came at a time he needed an excuse to grab his clubs and head out.
“Fellas,” he called. “I’m afraid duty calls. You’ll have to finish this one without me.”
As he loaded his bag on his back and prepared to walk back to the clubhouse, the drink cart rolled up the concrete path. To apologize for his behavior and hopefully redeem himself, he told the men drinks were on him, then handed the cart girl two twenty-dollar bills before grabbing a Gatorade for himself. As he cut across the first fairway, his phone buzzed again.
“How is my favorite sister-in-law?” he asked.
Her contagious laugh came through the phone. It was nice to know Bree wasn’t the kind of woman to hold a grudge. “I’m your only sister-in-law.”
“Yes, yes. I know. Do I need to stop and get some flowers or a gift or something?”
“I’m taking care of it for you as we speak. They have quiet time on the maternity ward until four, so no visitors until then. We’ll meet you downstairs in the lobby and you can sign the card before we go up to the room.”
“You’re the absolute best,” he said while winding his way down the cart path to the first tee. “If you weren’t married to my brother, I’d marry you myself.”
She scoffed in disbelief. “I’d never marry you.”
Now it was his turn to laugh. “And why is that? I’m a catch, you know.”
“I wouldn’t marry you for the simple fact you’re in love with someone else.”
Shit. Well, he couldn’t really argue that point.
“By the way.” Having reached the clubhouse, he looked both ways before crossing the drive and heading for the parking lot. “I owe you an apology. For yelling at you. For storming out. For being an ass.”
He could practically hear her smile through the phone. “You’ve always been an ass, Michael. It’s one of your endearing qualities.”
Of course it was impossible for him to not smile back, even though she couldn’t see him. “Obviously, you never said anything to Danny either.”
“You were talking from a place of hurt and fear. I understand that. Now you just need to understand that Danny can’t quit being a soldier any more than you can quit being a doctor.”
She was a smart woman, his sister-in-law.
They spoke a few more minutes as Michael tossed his clubs into the trunk of his car, then, after they disconnected the call, he took a moment to drink down the last of his Gatorade. With three hours to kill before he met Danny and Bree at the hospital, he decided now was as good a time as any to go see Kacie, to apologize face-to-face before she left for Durham.
It had taken the better part of a week for him to realize his monumental fuckup, asking her to give up everything she’d worked so hard for, all so she could stay right here and make him happy. He owed her an apology. Knowing her like he did, a phone call, email, or a text message wasn’t going to cut it. And rightfully so.
He drove across town to Baldwin Park and her little carriage house, rehearsing all the things he needed to say in his head. He only hoped she’d give him a chance. Like so many times before, he parked along the curb in front of the main house and made his way down the driveway to the back. But as soon as he reached the corner he saw it, the black and red for rent sign posted in the front window. He climbed the front steps anyway and knocked on the front door, hoping the owners had jumped the gun with the sign since the moving trucks weren’t supposed to be comin
g until tomorrow.
“Are you looking for a place to rent?”
Michael turned to see an older man carrying a shovel and garden hose.
“I’m looking for Kacie.”
The man pulled off his hat and scratched the top of his head. “She moved out two days ago. Said her place in Durham was ready early so they loaded up her things and headed out.”
Michael’s heart sank, but he thanked the man and headed back to his car, telling himself along the way it was probably for the best.
To keep out of the way, Kacie stood in one corner of her kitchen and watched her apartment slowly fill up as the movers brought in stacks of boxes and furniture. She wasn’t quite sure how she had accumulated so much stuff.
“Thanks again for the movers, Daddy. You didn’t need to do this.”
His low chuckle came through clear on the phone. “Of course I did, because I wasn’t going to move all of your things. I’m too old for that.”
Kacie shook her head. “You aren’t that old.”
Again, he laughed. “Aren’t you the one always asking which is less: the price to pay someone or my insurance deductible? I can promise you, the movers were cheaper.”
They talked a few more minutes, but had to say goodbye when a call he’d been waiting on all day finally came through. She hadn’t been in Durham two days and already she was homesick. Which was silly, of course, seeing as she usually only saw her parents once, maybe twice a month when they lived in the same town.
But it felt different now. The security in knowing she could drive across town and see them anytime she wanted was gone.
By lunch the movers were done and the cable guy took their place, wandering back and forth from the living room to her closet as he hooked up her router and cable boxes. Once he finished, Kacie walked him to the door and was shocked to find her sister standing in the hallway.
“Surprise!” Sam yelled, and rushed in through the doorway at the same time the cable man squeezed his way out.
From the Start Page 21
