by David Lubar
Greg's burning desire was to find one perfect scheme that would pay back the dogs for what they had done to him. He wanted to drive them over the edge of sanity — make them so crazy that their owners would have to send them to the pound.
The idea came to him when he was watching television. It was perfect. It was so absolutely perfectly wonderful that he almost decided to share it with the rest of the kids in the neighborhood. They'd love it. He'd be a hero. But if other kids knew, the word would get around to the adults and he'd get in trouble. Greg decided to keep his revenge to himself. Nobody could ever know what he'd done.
"I got you now," Greg said as he began working on his plan. It was easy. His dad had all sorts of gadgets and equipment. Everything Greg wanted was in the house, except for one important part. And that wouldn't be hard to get. Greg took his dad's video camera and started filming. For the rest of the day, he took close-up pictures of cats. He filmed every cat he could find. He even chased a couple of them so he could get pictures of them running.
Now, he just had to make sure the Ulmeyers were away. But that was easy. Greg went for a walk each evening, watching for the light next to the garage.
Soon enough, he saw it. "It's payback time," he said, looking down the street at the Ulmeyer's lawn. Everything was perfect. The rain that had been falling earlier had stopped now. Greg gathered what he needed — the portable TV, the camera, and couple extension cords.
The plan was so simple and so great. Greg couldn't keep the grin off of his face. Right across the street from the Ulmeyer's house, there was a new house. It wasn't finished yet, but it looked like the electricity was hooked up. Greg put the TV and camera at the edge of the Ulmeyer's lawn and then ran the extension cord along the ground, taking it to the new house. As he'd expected, it wasn't long enough. He plugged it into the second cord and carried that one to the house, where he found an outlet near the front door.
The dogs were already barking at him, but Greg was pretty sure that even if people heard the noise, they wouldn't bother to see what was causing it. They must have been pretty used to the barking by now. He figured they'd probably even thank him if they knew what he was doing.
"This will drive you crazy," Greg said to the dogs. He couldn't wait. It was going to be fabulous. They'd see the cats and just go wild.
Greg turned on the TV. The dogs stood at the edge of their yard and snarled at him. Greg smiled. He reached for the PLAY button on the camera. But he didn't press it yet. Maybe just a bit closer, he thought, looking at the three dogs. He slid the set forward a few more inches.
Zzzzzztttt.
Greg spun when he heard the crackling sound. "Oh, crap..." He'd dragged the cords into a puddle, right where they were plugged together. He froze, unsure what to do. He didn't want to switch off the TV. He was so close to carrying out his plan.
His eyes, ears, and nose got smacked all at once with a zap, a flash, and the smell of burning plastic. The zap was followed by a dead silence. Even the dogs stopped barking for an instant. Greg noticed that the light in front of the Ulmeyer's garage had gone dark. They couldn't be home, he thought. He'd have seen them come in. But why was the light off?
"Wait..." All the lights in the house were off. He looked to his left, and then to his right. There wasn't a single light on. No porch lights. No living room lights. There was no sign of light at all on Perry street.
Or any other electricity.
Greg heard a growl. One of the dogs stepped past the edge of the lawn.
No electricity.
Greg heard three growls. The other two dogs stepped past the edge of the lawn.
No fence.
Greg took a step away from the dogs. The dogs took a step toward Greg. Greg ran. The dogs ran faster. They stopped barking. They were too busy biting.
It was Greg's turn to make loud noises.
About the author
David Lubar grew up in Morristown, NJ. The son of a school librarian, his lack of athletic or social skills allowed him to begin polishing his literary talents and love of reading at an early age. He credits his passion for short stories to his limited attention span and his even-more-limited typing ability. He sold his first short story in 1978, two years after graduating from Rutgers. Armed with a degree in Philosophy and no discernible job skills, he spent the bulk of the Carter administration as a starving writer before accidentally discovering he knew how to program computers.
He’s written more than two dozen books for young readers, including Hidden Talents, Flip, Invasion of the Road Weenies, Punished!, Dunk, and Sleeping Freshmen Never Lie. His novels are on reading lists across the country, saving countless students from a close encounter with Madame Bovary. His short stories have appeared in the collections of such respected anthologists as M. Jerry Weiss and Don Gallo, and in a variety of magazines, including Boy's Life, READ, and Nickelodeon. He has published an eclectic body of humor pieces in both national and regional publications. In a former, geekier phase of his life, he designed and programmed many old-school video games, including Home Alone, and Frogger 2. In his spare time, he takes naps on the couch.
He lives in Nazareth, Pennsylvania with his wife and a trio of felines. He also lives online at www.davidlubar.com.
Other books by David Lubar
Novels:
Hidden Talents
True Talents
Flip
Dunk
Sleeping Freshmen Never Lie
Story collections:
In the Land of the Lawn Weenies and Other Warped and Creepy Tales
Invasion of the Road Weenies and Other Warped and Creepy Tales
The Curse of the Campfire Weenies and Other Warped and Creepy Tales
The Battle of the Red Hot pepper Weenies and Other Warped and Creepy Tales
Attack of the Vampire Weenies and Other Warped and Creepy Tales
Chapter Books:
My Rotten Life: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie, book #1
Dead Guy Spy: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie, book #2
Goop Soup: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie, book #3
The Big Stink: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie, book #4
Enter the Zombie: Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie, book #5
Punished!
Dog Days
eBooks:
It Seemed Funny at the Time: a large collection of short humor
Pulling up Stakes and Other Piercing Tales
See them all on his book page: http://www.davidlubar.com/mybooks.html
