by S M Mala
‘Esme.’
She jumped, nearly spilling her wine.
Barbara was standing at her back door.
‘Hello. I thought you were with Mali.’
‘Stan is looking after her. I wanted to talk to you alone,’ she said, her face quite stern. ‘Can I come in?’
It was the last thing Esme needed right now, but nodded and got up, pulling the door open.
‘Would you like a drink?’
‘That would be nice.’
Esme poured some wine and gestured her to sit down, which she did.
‘I won’t interrupt,’ Esme said quietly. ‘Please say what you have to say.’
‘Leon was very much like Mali. Very loving, funny and kind. The most wonderful little boy you’d ever meet.’ Barbara sipped her drink. ‘As he got older, his dad guided him along but Leon wears his heart on his sleeve. I knew someone would trample on it. For years, I thought I kept him safe until the day he met Bennylita. It changed my son.’
‘So he said,’ added Esme, watching the woman’s pained expression.
‘She took away him; the kind, caring, sweet man that he was and created something we couldn’t handle. It was awful to watch the effect she had on him. It hurt me so much. Then I could see she was using him, in many, many ways. And that poor child didn’t know what to do. He was at loggerheads on how to keep her. The day he told me she was pregnant, I cried. I knew it wasn’t right.
‘I never forced her to leave him. She wanted to go. I never offered her money. She asked. The thing I did, without telling the people I loved, was that I kept on paying. I don’t know why she has come back, but the offer of a baby? How cruel can she be?’
‘She knows what he wants and how to get it,’ Esme said, feeling sick on saying the words.
‘And you? Where do you come into this?’
Esme laughed, shaking her head and sipping her wine.
‘I don’t come into it. I met your son, and we get on well. I don’t want anything from him. I love him and his child. There is no intention to be a replacement mother or grandmother figure. In my life, to find someone that makes me happy is amazing.’
‘You’re so much older,’ Barbara said, looking on in despair. ‘Can’t you see he needs to meet someone to give him hope?’
Sitting up straight and leaning forward, Esme looked into the woman’s eyes; the same eyes as Leon’s.
‘I understand. My son had a much older lover, and he treated Alfie so badly. Every day I lived in despair how sad he made him. Thing is; I can’t live my son’s life. Of course, you want someone to make Leon happy, not hurt him.’
‘How can I be sure you’re not using my son as a bit of fun?’
‘I love him, Barbara, and he loves me.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Right now, I really hope so.’
‘Don’t you love me anymore?’
Bennylita was smiling as he sipped a bottle of beer while sat in his local bar. ‘After all your declarations of love. I know you tried to find me after I left.’
‘I was going through a bad time with a baby.’
‘A year afterwards?’
‘I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘You’re not doing that now.’
‘What do you want?’ Leon sighed, shaking his head. ‘I take it the offer of a child is a wind-up?’
‘You thought about it though, didn’t you?’
‘I’d love another Mali. If you knew her like I did, you’d want another one too.’
‘I want to see her.’
‘Not now,’ he said, letting out a loud sigh. ‘You didn’t give a shit for five years and you can’t just waltz back in. She’s a little girl, and you’ll confuse the situation.’
‘When I spoke to her, I could see you did a good job, but she needs a mother.’
‘She’s got me.’
‘And that geriatric you’re seeing? Are you doing her for free babysitting?’
The comment didn’t wind him up. It made him see her for what she was.
Bennylita could never say a nice thing about another human being, and he knew it.
He had been her verbal punch bag since they met.
And it had hurt.
‘Aren’t you worried about Leo?’ he asked, avoiding eye contact. ‘As you’re such an earth mother.’
‘I named him after you.’
She grinned and sipped her vodka and tonic, moving closer. He could feel the warmth of her thigh against his. Leon wanted to budge because he knew what she was up to.
If she couldn’t get her way by negotiating, she always had another way.
Sex.
‘Bennylita, you come back on the scene and cause trouble. Upsetting my mother and not to mention my dad.’ He cleared his throat. ‘And then going to see Esme and telling her she’s past it.’
‘Why do you want her?’
‘I think she’s amazing.’
‘Bet the sex is all missionary position, isn’t it? Can’t be that much fun, or are you desperate?’
Looking at her, he realised she wasn’t as pretty as when they first met. Life had made her a little harsh. The beauty was starting to fade.
‘Are you prepared to have another child with me?’ he asked, leaning closer.
‘I want to be a family with you and Mali, not to mention Leo. I’ll get custody, and we can live together.’ She reached out and touched his hand. ‘Leon I love you so much. I regret it all. Will you ever forgive me?’
He glanced around the place, noticing couples.
‘What’s the attraction between you and the old woman?’ asked Bennylita, staring straight at him. ‘Is she some substitute mother figure? We all know how much you like your mummy.’
‘Does it go against your nature to be kind about someone?’ he asked, letting out a small laugh. ‘God, you made my life hell.’
‘If I remember, I gave you the best sex ever, so you told me. Doubt if this Esme could do the same. Her bits must be all saggy and horrible.’ Bennylita shivered. ‘The idea you want to sleep with her makes me feel sick.’
‘The idea I’d ever consider sleeping with you again is much worse.’
Then the happy face slipped, and he recognised the angry woman behind it.
That face he watched for most days that made him feel hurt and sad, lonely as well as very angry.
He didn’t know what he did to deserve it, but she put him through hell, and Leon knew she enjoyed every moment, chiselling at his confidence.
‘I don’t want a kid with you,’ he heard himself say, remembering the angst he had felt all those year ago.
He had regained his happiness in small, sizeable chunks.
‘She can’t give you one!’
‘Why do a background check on Esme?’ Leon hissed. ‘Leave her out of it.’
‘Oh, I can’t,’ smiled Bennylita. ‘Her husband is very important in America. I was doing some research on the web and found out by accident.’
‘By accident?’ he asked, knowing there was more to it.
‘Is she happy to be with a gardener and electrician? Considering Oscar Reeves is one of the golden boys in New York, I’d thought she’d go for something else.’
Leon laughed.
‘So she’s too old for me and I’m not good enough for her. Is that what you’re saying?’ he eventually replied, seeing her get agitated. ‘I’ll put you straight on a few things. She’s perfect for me, and I’m perfect for her. Mali totally adores Esme, and I’ve never seen my daughter, yes, my daughter so happy. Thanks for trying to fuck with my head but it didn’t work this time. Goodbye!’
She quickly grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him closer, kissing him on the lips.
‘And that,’ he said, pulling away and wiping his mouth. ‘Just sealed the deal.’
‘Love you mummy Esme.’
Mali was sitting on Esme’s lap in Leon’s house, cuddled up on the sofa.
Stan had dropped Mali off but seemed a little shocked to find Bar
bara there. Seeing his wife looked quite upset, he whisked her off but not before giving Esme a massive hug and telling her everything would be okay.
Right then, Esme wasn’t too sure.
‘You better not be calling me that in front of your Nana,’ Esme replied, kissing Mali’s cheek. ‘And daddy said you could stay up until eight o’clock? Are you sure?’
Mali nodded, her eyes now looking at the ground. Esme knew she was fibbing.
‘Why did my mummy not want me when I was a baby?’ Mali asked. ‘She not love me?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. I think she knew your daddy would make you really happy. He loves you so much, do you know that?’ The little girl nodded. ‘And I’m so happy you moved in next door to me.’
‘I not want daddy to cry again.’
‘Did he used to cry a lot?’
‘When I was little, he would cry when I went to bed.’
‘But you were in bed.’
‘I got up for a wee wee and he used to cry. He not want me to know. Make me sad. I told Nana and Grandpa, and they said to hug and kiss him, and do as I am told, and be a good girl.’
‘And he hasn’t cried for a long time?’
‘Only when I told him about mummy witch.’
‘Mali?’
‘I love you, mummy,’ she said and hugged her.
Esme tried quickly to gulp back the tears as she hugged her back.
‘And I love you.’
‘Now, what do we have here?’ Leon said, making them jump. ‘Shouldn’t you be in bed, young lady?’
Mali was about to say something and looked at Esme.
‘I said she could wait up for you. It’s Friday.’
As she looked up, Esme noticed he was standing against the door frame, smiling.
‘You know what?’ he sighed, walking in and putting down his door keys and wallet. ‘It’s amazing to come home and be greeted by two very beautiful girls.’
‘I think your daddy’s eyesight is going if he’s looking at me,’ Esme said, tickling Mali. ‘He must be looking at you.’
‘Not tickle me!’ laughed Mali, fending Esme off. ‘I think you are a beautiful princess.’
‘I see eye trouble runs in the family.’
She watched Leon sit opposite them in the armchair.
Esme desperately wanted to ask him what happened but knew she had to wait until Mali went to bed. There was a smirk he seemed unable to wipe off his face.
‘I think you should go to bed,’ he said, resting his head against the back. ‘What time did my parents drop her off?’
‘Only grandpa,’ said Mali, trying to tickle Esme. ‘Nana was here.’
She watched his eyes widen and look at her questioningly.
‘Here?’
‘Yes, she popped by on the off chance,’ replied Esme, looking away. ‘She has a few things on her mind.’
‘Okay baby!’ he said, standing up. ‘I’m taking you to bed.’ Scooping Mali up in his arms the little girl reached down and kissed Esme.
‘Night, night,’ she said, resting her head against her daddy’s shoulder, and pushing her thumb in her mouth.
‘Night, night,’ Esme said and noticed Leon turn to look at her before he mouthed.
‘And then I’m taking you to bed.’
He returned within ten minutes and was still smiling as he sat next to her. Then he leaned forward and kissed her gently on the lips.
‘I don’t want you to ever to stop kissing me, do you hear?’ he whispered. ‘Because if you did, it would break my heart.’
‘What happened?’
‘Nothing.’
‘You don’t want to tell me?’ Her heart was beating very fast, and she felt him put his hand on her chest plate. ‘I want to know.’
‘What happened with my mum?’
‘She voiced her concerns. I understand where she’s coming from. My son was screwing a pensioner.’
Leon laughed out loudly.
‘You are no way near pensionable age,’ he said, kissing her cheeks. ‘That cheeky bitch ex of mine made a few tasteless comments about you.’
‘I’m not surprised,’ she said, closing her eyes and nodding. ‘There’s a lot to say.’
Then he kissed her again, this time more passionately. He wrapped his arms around her back, and she felt his tongue touch hers.
Something was going on.
‘And what decision have you come to?’ she whispered after pulling away. ‘Can you tell me?’
‘Does it make a difference between me and you?’
‘It makes no difference. Whatever you decide, I’ll support and love you. That’s the least I can do. You deserve to be happy.’ Esme pushed her hand through the front of his hair. ‘Your mum worries about you. I worry because I love you.’
‘Kiss me,’ he asked and she knew he wasn’t going to tell her.
He was probably biding his time before he would break her heart.
That’s what was going on through her head.
Kissing him gently, he stood up; his lips still attached to her.
‘Now it’s your bedtime,’ Leon whispered, pulling her up and holding her hand while they went to the bedroom.
He poked his head around the corner and smiled.
‘She’s fast asleep,’ he whispered, shutting the door.
Then they walked into the bedroom. He pulled off all her clothes and kissed her at the same time. Esme decided to block all her questions.
This is what she needed.
Him.
She undressed Leon, examining every inch of his body with her mouth and fingers. Then she sunk to her knees and pushed him between her lips. Her eyes moved up, and he was looking at her, still with the same grin he had since returning home.
Esme knew she had to do the best job ever, so she continued to lick and suck, caressing his firm balls in her hand. Her jaw started to hurt, but she wasn’t going to let that stop her.
Unfortunately the image of getting old, losing her teeth and being able to do a better job without her dentures popped into her head.
‘I want us to come together,’ he said, making her fanny instantly pulsate.
He pulled her up to her feet, pushing her back onto the bed. Leon parted her legs and let his finger run up her inner left thigh, through her fanny, towards her lips. Sticking the top of his finger into her hole, she squeezed so he could see she still had some working parts. There was a grin as his finger travelled to her bean, rubbing it slowly. Then he kissed her stomach and all the way up to her breasts, looking at her as he did it.
When he sucked her nipple, he then held it between his teeth, gently biting.
It was too much.
Esme thought she was going to come, especially when he started rubbing her faster.
She groaned when he held onto one of her wrists, pushing it behind her back. Her spine arched, and she felt the tightening throb and sobbed out an orgasm while he covered her mouth to stop her making a noise.
She felt him push inside, still her wrist behind her back. Then he took both her wrists and held them at her side before manoeuvring them over her head.
There was something raw about them screwing on top of the bed.
Esme came again and wanted to touch him, but he was looking at her and then down at them joined. She could see the glistening of his cock as he went in and out of her. The sight was orgasmic, and he started to thrust harder.
‘You’re turning me on, so much,’ she gasped, wrapping her legs against his arse. ‘I promise I’ll never dry up when I’m with you.’
‘Good,’ he whispered, rubbing his body against hers. ‘This is very sexy, and so are you.’
He picked up his speed and she was trying hard not to make a noise, but he squeezed her wrists a little tighter and fucked her at high speed.
Again her back arched, and he bit her nipples before sucking hard and she pursed her lips so hard, holding onto the scream happening throughout her body.
Then he came, she felt his body shiver wh
ile his mouth was full of her breast.
‘I love you,’ she whispered again and again.
Her face was being covered in kisses, but still he held her wrists.
Their eyes met, and he grinned.
‘Esme, I love you with all my heart. I’m a prick for not realising you’re all I want.’
Her heart was fit to burst – and so was her delicate, throbbing fanny.
‘I don’t want a baby with you.’
Leon limited his words. ‘And you can’t see Mali. The chances of us ever getting back together are nil. Now go back to your family and sort out your life.’
He had called Bennylita on Sunday to make sure she was aware of his decision. She didn’t pick up the phone, so he left a message.
It was best for him to tell the truth.
Ahead of him, Esme and Mali were feeding the ducks. It was a warm afternoon, and he had promised them ice cream.
Everything was now clear in his mind.
As much as he would like another kid, he didn’t really want one.
Not now he had found Esme.
The love he craved for was there, in a gorgeous package of the fifty-year-old woman that brought his heart alive.
He felt guilty for putting her through hell a few weeks back. Leon decided not to say anything, knowing she looked upset every time Bennylita’s name was mentioned.
But he had to clear the air so she would realise he had been a prick and that only Mali and she mattered.
Also, she didn’t say much about what his mother had said.
Walking up towards them, he noticed Mali was throwing bread at a duck’s head and laughing.
‘That’s not nice,’ he said, bending down and kissing Esme on the cheek. ‘Be nice.’
‘I am nice,’ the little girl replied. ‘That ducky not like the bread.’
‘Could that be because he has eaten a few slices already?’ Esme asked and laughed.
‘It was hungry,’ Mali said, shaking her head. ‘He not hungry anymore.’
‘Girls, I need to talk to you. Shall we get an ice cream and then I can tell you what’s on my mind?’
Esme anxiously looked at him while Mali nodded, grabbed his hand and skipped as they walked. He put his arm around Esme’s shoulder as she looked up at him.
