by King, Deja
her cute little voice asked as if amazed.
“Of course. I teach you, so you can learn from me and eventually be better than me. That’s what I want for you. One day Mommy and Daddy may not be here to take care of you, so it’s my duty to make sure you can take care of yourself. You gotta know how to get dough and be a dough girl like your Mommy,” Kasey preached not quite understanding her reasons.
“How do you get dough, Ma? And why?”
“You gotta work to get money, Maj, and always have a hustle. In life nobody owes you anything so you have to be able to make dough so you can get what you desire yourself. This is a new era and most men aren’t taking care of their ladies how it was intended. So never look for stability in a man, you look for it in yourself. Even when you find someone you love, you still must have your own. And never settle for anything but the best.”
“So the money that’s in my piggy bank is the start of me growing up to be a dough girl?”
“Yup! And know, money comes and go so you better enjoy it
‘cause no one can predict the future. Got it?”
Semaj nodded, but neither of them had any idea that this would be the last time that they would share a mother-to-daughter talk, and becoming a dough girl would be the conversation left on this little innocent child’s heart.
Kasey slowed down when she reached Grandly Road and turned into the alley. She made her way to the back of the grocery market. This nigga got this bitch hiding in eerie ass places now. This shit has to stop now, she thought as she noticed a figure standing by the garbage can in dark colored clothing. Kasey beeped her horn to get her attention while pulling alongside of the dumpster.
“Girl, you hiding all the way back here, this shit ridiculous. I promise this my last time…” Kasey fussed as Sabrina hopped in the backseat with a hoodie pulled down over her face. Sabrina didn’t utter a word as she raised her semiautomatic handgun and silenced Kasey forever—with no remorse. Her jealous heart now felt whole. She got out of the car and heard the piercing wails coming from her godchild’s mouth…but never looked back knowing she’d robbed the child of her mother.
After that tragic night things took a turn for the worst, crumbling the young child’s world. After Kasey’s death, the streets were talking and Murder Mitch found out that not only did Kasey’s father want him dead but he had his people looking for Semaj because he planned on bringing her out West to live with him. After losing his wife, Murder Mitch refused to lose his daughter too. So he put Semaj in hiding at his mother’s house in Atlantic City. Murder Mitch knew he couldn’t attend the funeral of his late wife because he would be walking into a death trap. He had to lay low so nobody could find him or Semaj. He hoped that Kasey’s father would realize that although he vowed to protect her, her murder was out of his control. But he was an unforgiving man so Murder Mitch had accepted that he might have to stay on the run with Semaj for the rest of their lives.
Semaj and Tala, who was eight years her senior stood peering out the windowpane as they watched Murder Mitch back out of the driveway and disappear down the long road. Tears streamed down Semaj’s face as she stared, struggling to still see the view of the car that was seemingly long gone.
“Maj, what are you crying for? You don’t have to cry. It’ll be okay,” Tala said, stroking her niece’s hair.
“I’m just so sad, Tala. I don’t want my Daddy to leave me like my
Mother did. And I miss her.”
Tala wiped her niece’s teary eyes. “I know you miss your mother, Maj. You have a right to miss her. But your father always told me that the Lord above takes some of the best people first because He’s ready for them to come home with Him. Your mother was too good for this world,” she said. Tala was trying to say all of the right things. “When my father died I was sad too. So that’s normal and expected, Maj. And your daddy will never leave you. He loves you. You are his princess.”
Mrs. Richardson came in the room and startled the girls. She looked at them with the warmest smile and though she felt her sickened body was weakening, she knew that they needed her. She walked toward them. “Is everything ok?”
“Yes, Mother, everything is fine.” Tala said, not wanting her mother to worry.
“I’m glad to know that. I know you both must be hungry so come in here and eat some of this good food.”
As the hours passed and the girls sat down at the dining room table laughing and joking, for the first time, Semaj was able to feel some sort of happiness that had been eluding her since her mother’s death. But then that moment of happiness soon passed. Although the small box-sized TV was diminutive, the six pair of eyes could see the live media coverage of Murder Mitch’s arrest.
“My Daddy! My Daddy! Oh not my Daddy!” Semaj ran to the television and hoped her eyes were playing tricks on her. He was handcuffed and being placed in the back of the police car. An unbearable pain traveled through Semaj as her stomach was performing somersaults. While the girls were entranced with Murder Mitch’s arrest, unbeknownst to them, Mrs. Richardson was clenching her neck hoping to find air. She was choking to death, and her face- flushed cherry red as the incident was the last her fragile heart could take. She had been defeated.
Tala was the first to turn and see something was wrong with her mother. Tears formed as her mother died right in front of her eyes. Tala rushed to her mother’s aid but there was no saving her. It was too late. Her mother had suffered an unpreventable heart attack.
After getting the details of what happened to his wife the day she was murdered from Semaj, Murder Mitch did what any husband with a penchant for blood would do. He made sure that Sabrina would never take another breath again. But because there was no evidence linking Murder Mitch directly to the crime, they instead hit him with the next best thing, accessory to murder for being near the crime scene. Not wanting the police to dig deeper into his background since it was a fact he murdered Sabrina, and because he made a career out of putting people six feet under, he opted to take a plea of seven years served in the state prison. When Murder Mitch got locked up he still didn’t want his daughter raised by Kasey’s family because he knew they thought of him as the enemy. So instead Semaj and Tala were left to fend for themselves.
Within a blink of an eye, the girls went from being overindulged to not being sure if they would have food to eat the next day. Tala felt that she had to do something. She couldn’t allow the system to separate them. She would have given her left arm before she allowed her niece to be dragged through the system. She wasn’t willing to allow her to be a ward of the State. When the authorities arrived, Tala made sure they were long gone.
From pillar to post, not having a house to piss in or a window to throw it out of, Tala made a way for her and Semaj to survive. When she turned eighteen, she knew they could not touch her and that’s when she went to public housing for help. Within a week, they had a permanent place to lay their heads. Yes, it was in the projects but at least they had someplace to call home.
Immediately, she applied for jobs everywhere, from fast-food joints, grocery markets and bodegas. She soon found a job at a detail shop and though the pay rate was six dollars an hour, she left with plenty more due to tips from the local drug dealers that frequented the spot. With the pay she was making and proving that she could provide for her niece, the judge granted Tala custody of Semaj under strict supervision.
Being that she had to care after Semaj, she dropped out of school but she did get her GED. That was one of the stipulations she had along with maintaining employment. The state issued her a small monthly check for Semaj and food assistance, but that still wasn’t enough. It seemed as if every time Tala got some extra money there was an unforeseen bill to be paid or they needed something around the house.
Tala felt it was a blessing when she met an older lady in the building named Ms. Long. When necessary which was often, she would look after Semaj while Tala worked. She even fed them plenty of nights. But Tala never wanted to seem like they were
leeches so often she faked as if she had everything together.
Although young, Semaj’s eyes were wide open and seeing her aunt constantly on her grind trying to maintain made her mature at a rapid rate. Semaj appreciated everything her auntie was doing to hold them down but instead of enjoying her youth she wanted to step up and be able to contribute. They were in this together and at the age of thirteen Semaj knew she had to take heed to her mother’s last words, which was to have a hustle so you could make your own money. Many nights they went without, but somehow Semaj and Tala managed to survive.
To some seven years isn’t long, but to a muthafucka on lockdown it seemed like forever times forever. Murder Mitch, like any other individual that had something waiting on him on the outside, felt despair and guilt. Many would see it as selfish but to Murder Mitch it was fear that allowed him to let his baby sister and daughter be out on the outside alone. But he couldn’t allow Kasey’s family to take his only child away from him. She was all that he had left in this world and he knew that she and Tala were soldiers and would survive. He never regretted his actions.
The day Murder Mitch said goodbye to those prison walls, he promised himself to never return and before he did, he’d go out with a bang. Guilt weighing down on his soul for being locked up for all those years unable to care for his sister and daughter had turned Murder Mitch’s heart even colder. He had changed, but best believe it was in a sick way—he felt the world owed him and he wanted payment in full.
Tala and Semaj was waiting on Murder Mitch as he waltzed out of the wrought iron gates. The girls ran to him as if in a relay race. “Daddy!” Semaj yelled as she jumped into her father’s open arms.
“Big bra!” Tala cooed as the three of them embraced one another. “I’m so sorry. I love you girls so much and a day didn’t pass
where I didn’t think about the both of you. I read every letter y’all wrote and it hurt me so badly that I couldn’t even find the strength to write back,” Murder Mitch asserted honestly. “And just give me some time and you all will never go through another day of hardship again.”
In Semaj’s fifteen-year-old mind she just knew that their poverty-stricken life was over and her daddy was going to save the day. Every day she remembered the big houses, nice cars and expensive clothes. She never could forget it, because she longed for the day when she would have it all back.
When they pulled up to Marcy Projects in Brooklyn, Murder Mitch’s heart sank. He had left his two favorite girls to live and be raised by the vile streets. He promised himself at that moment he would do whatever necessary to get them out of such despair.
Weeks had passed and the duo had grown close to Murder Mitch. They had quickly become the Three Musketeers and they lived by the creed: All for one, one for all. But to everyone’s dismay, it wasn’t as easy as the trio thought it would be for Murder Mitch to get that dollar.
No doubt, Murder Mitch knew drug peddlers and criminals, but it seemed like there was a shortage of the OGs that he used to work for seven years ago. Either niggas wasn’t willing to give up the information on current locations, or cat’s drug empires had went into shambles. He knew he couldn’t go around asking any and everybody who needed somebody killed for a fee. Now, he was on the verge of hitting niggas’ blocks up, but then again, how much money was actually in the petty robbery business on some low-level block boys? Hitting niggas for their pockets was dumb and thirsty, and Murder Mitch knew he had to go for the stash and safe houses.
“I swear I’m not up for this shit. All I got was one hundred measly dollars,” Semaj sighed as she flopped down on the couch. “I’m finna start sellin’ pussy!” She knew she would never but it was how she felt. “‘Cause this going in niggas pockets when they sleep ain’t working. The shit is dumb. I’m really tired of this stuff.”
Murder Mitch looked at his daughter in concern. “Maj, I’ll get out here and take niggas’ shit before I let you degrade yourself like that.
Don’t talk like that,” he retrieved his pre-rolled vanilla Dutch. “I’m serious.”
“Maj, only reason why you trippin’ is because you thought once Mitch came home the money would miraculously begin falling from the sky without any work. But that ain’t how shit goes, Semaj. Life ain’t that easy.”
“You right. It’s unfair. And that’s why I don’t care about nothing,” she shrugged. “Daddy, I’ve been thinking. Mommy always told me that I gotta get money on my own and have a hustle. I think if we put this plan into action, it would be on and poppin’ for us.”
“And what do you have in mind?” he asked.
“I’m thinking about setting Vega’s big brother Boo connect up. I know where that nigga stash house at. I been with Vega when dropping money off for Boo, and they be having close to 30, 40 thou in the trap on an average day.”
“Hell nah, Maj. You trippin’! That’s too close to home. Vega is yo’ man. That shit alone is risky. And you talkin’ about having yo’ pops run up into the spot. Fuck no!”
“Let me handle the Vega situation. He’ll have no idea I’m involved with the robbery. It’s not like it’s him, it’s his brother’s connect. Plus, this the only way I can see us getting somewhere. What else we gon’ do to get real money? What, you wanna live in the fucking ghetto forever?”
“If I have to, I will. I’m cool on that I just can’t get involved,” Tala conveyed.
“And I respect how you feel, Tala. But I just cannot continue to live like this. I just can’t. I don’t see any other option as of now.”
“You are only fifteen, girl. You have your whole life ahead of you. You said one day you wanna be an actress. If you work at it, it can happen.”
“You know that life ain’t for girls like me from the ghetto. I have to figure out how to survive in the world I’m in right now. Enough of this suffering. I can’t wait no longer. Something gotta shake. Like yesterday.” She paused and continued. “So Daddy, what up?” Semaj stared in her father’s eyes.
Murder Mitch looked at his daughter shocked. He felt as if he was having a conversation with his deceased wife Kasey. Semaj had inherited the same love for money. The room fell silent as they searched for the same answer, a better resolution because none of them wanted to continue being broke. But they came up empty.
Murder Mitch’s mind was spinning like a merry-go-round. His pockets were filled with lint and he was in desperate need to fill the space with dead presidents. He wanted to see his daughter enjoy life again. “Okay, this is what we can do,” he pulled from the blunt, holding the smoke in his lungs as he passed it to Tala. “‘Cause I don’t want you involved in the least.”
Though some may consider Murder Mitch a terrible father for cosigning on a scheme that could easily set up his daughter for an early date with death, in his mind he rationalized it differently. He simply wanted what any father hoped for their daughter—a better life.
“Please tell me that you’re not encouraging her?” Tala asked wondering how Semaj’s crazy idea was about to come to fruition.
“I’m telling you Ta, this is the only way. We need to get some real money. We ain’t gotta do nothing and it’s only for a short time until we get our stacks up,” Semaj reasoned.
The three of them stared at each other intensely. Though Semaj said it would be for a short time period, they all knew once they got started there was no turning back. Semaj gave her father the details and from there he could manage the rest.
When Semaj came up with the plan to set up her boyfriend’s, brother Boo’s connect, she never imagined in a million years it would lead to her first love’s demise. Semaj was only thirteen when she met Nathan Giles aka Vega. He was seventeen and a brown paper bag boy for his older brother, Boo. Immediately they had fallen hard for each other. They had been each other’s first love. Besides Boo, Semaj was the only thing he ever loved. He was the product of a street whore and an absentee father. Since a youngin’ he and his brother had been left with their elderly grandmother that secretly had her own dru
g addictions and paid the boys no mind. When Boo jumped off the porch, things started looking up for the brothers.
Semaj and Vega had met at a Rutgers basketball game in Harlem. She noticed him checking for her as she was doing the same with him. She had heard his name from being in the mix at the city events, and knew mad chicks were checking for him. The fact that Boo was his older brother also made him a target to the girls who thought fucking with him would bring them ‘hood fame.
Vega had watched Semaj as she tied her shirt into a knot trying to get a little breeze from the sweltering heat. Between the sweat dripping down her taut belly and the way she licked her Firecracker Popsicle, she was driving the young boy’s lust into overdrive. Though she was almost fourteen, Semaj had the body of a twenty-one year old vixen.
Vega had always admired her from afar but was reluctant about approaching her. But this day was different. He was unable to resist. Maybe it was the way her short shorts made her voluptuous ass look even bigger. Her thick hair was pulled into a ponytail to display her beautiful innocent face and though sweaty, her baby hair laid down to perfection. As Semaj walked past to purchase another popsicle, Vega reached out and pulled her to him. “What‘s up, cutie?”
“Nothing,” she answered shyly.
“I want to see if I can take you out.”
Oh my God, he wanna take me out! He picks me out of all the girls. Okay, dummy, say something. “Well, I’ll have to see what my auntie says. Just tell me your number and I’ll call and let you know.” He recited his number in hopes of her remembering it. The two clicked immediately and it was as if they were meant to be. From that day on, they were almost inseparable. He would pick her up on weekends and she’d stay uptown with him and his brother, and sometimes Tala allowed him to stay at their spot, prohibiting him staying on school nights. It was truly puppy love, the kind you always remember. That’s why it hurt her so much that his death was on her, which made loving another man forbidden. Everyone was a potential victim.
