"Good day!" said Jane and Michael politely.
"Port and starboard!" cried the Admiral. "I don't call this a good day. Hur-rrrrrumph! A hideous, hoary, land lubberly sort of a day, I call it. Why doesn't the Spring come? Tell me that!"
"Now, Andrew! Now, Willoughby! Keep close to Mother!"
Miss Lark, muffled up in a long fur coat and wearing a fur hat like a tea-cosy, was taking a walk with her two dogs.
"Good morning, everybody!" She greeted them fussily. "What weather! Where has the sun gone? And why doesn't the Spring come?"
"Don't ask me, Ma'am!" shouted Admiral Boom. "No affair of mine. You should go to sea. Always good weather there! Go to sea!"
"Oh, Admiral Boom, I couldn't do that! I haven't the time. I am just off to buy Andrew and Willoughby a fur coat each."
A look of shame and horror passed between the two dogs.
"Fur coats!" roared the Admiral. "Blast my binnacle! Fur coats for a couple of mongrels? Heave her over! Port, I say! Up with the Anchor! Fur coats!"
"Admiral! Admiral!" cried Miss Lark, stopping her ears with her hands. "Such language! Please, please remember I am not used to it. And my dogs are not mongrels. Not at all! One has a long pedigree and the other has at least a Kind Heart. Mongrels, indeed!"
And she hurried away, talking to herself in a high, angry voice, with Andrew and Willoughby sidling behind her, swinging their tails and looking very uncomfortable and ashamed.
The Ice Cream Man trundled past on his cycle, going at a terrific rate and ringing his bell madly.
"DON'T STOP ME OR I SHALL CATCH COLD" said the notice in front of his cart.
"Whenever's that there Spring coming?" shouted the Ice Cream Man to the Sweep, who at that moment came trudging round the corner. To keep out the cold he had completely covered himself with brushes so that he looked more like a porcupine than a man.
"Bur-rum, bur-rum, bumble!" came the voice of the Sweep through the brushes.
"What's that?" said the Ice Cream Man.
"Bumble!"
The Sweep remarked, disappearing in at Miss Lark's Tradesman's Entrance.
In the gateway to the Park stood the Keeper, waving his arms and stamping his feet and blowing on his hands.
"Need a bit of Spring, don't we?" he said cheerfully to Mary Poppins as she and the children passed through.
"I'm, quite satisfied!" replied Mary Poppins primly, tossing her head.
"Self-satisfied, I'd call it," muttered the Keeper. But as he said it behind his hand, only Jane and Michael heard him.
Michael dawdled behind. He stooped and gathered up a handful of snow and rolled it between his palms.
"Jane, dear!" he called in a wheedling voice. "I've got something for you!"
She turned, and the snowball, whizzing through the air, caught her on the shoulder. With a squeal she began to burrow in the snow and presently there were snowballs flying through the air in every direction. And in and out, among the tossing, glistening balls, walked Mary Poppins, very prim and neat, and thinking to herself how handsome she looked in her large woolen gloves and her rabbit-skin coat.
And just as she was thinking that, a large snowball grazed past the brim of her hat and landed right on her nose.
"Oh!" screamed Michael, putting up both hands to his mouth. "I didn't mean to, Mary Poppins! I didn't, really. It was for Jane."
Mary Poppins turned and her face, as it appeared through the fringe of broken snowball, was terrible.
"Mary Poppins," he said earnestly. "I'm sorry. It was a Naccident!"
"A Naccident or not!" she retorted. "That's the end of your snowballing. Naccident, indeed! A Zulu would have better manners!"
She plucked the remains of the snowball from her neck and rolled them into a small ball between her woolen palms. Then she flung the ball right across the snowy lawn and went stamping haughtily after it.
"Now you've done it," whispered Jane.
"I didn't mean to," Michael whispered back.
"I know. But you know what she is!"
Mary Poppins, arriving at the place where the snowball had fallen, picked it up and threw it again, a long powerful throw.
"Where is she going?" said Michael suddenly. For the snowball was bowling away under the trees and, instead of keeping to the path, Mary Poppins was hurrying after it. Every now and then she dodged a little fall of snow as it tumbled softly from a branch.
"I can hardly keep up!" said Michael, stumbling over his own feet.
Mary Poppins quickened her steps. The children panted behind her. And when at last they caught up with the snowball, they found it lying beside the strangest building they had ever seen.
"I don't remember seeing this house before!" exclaimed Jane, her eyes wide with surprise.
"It's more like an Ark than a house," said Michael, staring.
The house stood solidly in the snow, moored by a thick rope to the trunk of a tree. Round it, like a verandah, ran a long narrow deck and its high peaked roof was painted bright scarlet. But the most curious thing about it was that though it had several windows there was not a single door.
"Where are we?" said Jane, full of curiosity and excitement.
Mary Poppins made no reply. She led the way along the deck and stopped in front of a notice that said,
"KNOCK THREE AND A HALF TIMES"
"What is half a knock?" whispered Michael to Jane.
"Sh!" she said, nodding towards Mary Poppins. And her nod said as clearly as if she had spoken—"We're on the brink of an Adventure. Don't spoil it by asking questions!"
Mary Poppins, seizing the knocker that hung above the notice, swung it upwards and knocked three times against the wall. Then, taking it daintily between the finger and thumb of her woolen glove, she gave the merest, tiniest, smallest, gentlest tap.
Like this.
RAP! RAP! RAP!… tap.
Immediately, as though it had been listening and waiting for that signal, the roof of the building flew back on its hinges.
"Goodness Graciousness!" Michael could not restrain the exclamation, for the wind of the roof, as it swung open, nearly lifted his hat off.
Mary Poppins walked to the end of the narrow deck and began to climb a small, steep ladder. At the top she turned, and looking very solemn and important, beckoned with a woolly finger.
"Step up, please!"
The four children hurried after her.
"Jump!" cried Mary Poppins, leaping down from the top of the ladder into the house. She turned and caught the Twins as they came tumbling over the edge with Jane and Michael after them. And as soon as they were all safely inside, the roof closed over again and shut with a little click.
They gazed round them. Four pairs of eyes popped with surprise.
"What a funny room!" exclaimed Jane.
But it was really more than funny. It was extraordinary. The only piece of furniture in it was a large counter that ran along one end of the room. The walls were white-washed, and leaning against them were piles of wood cut into the shape of trees and branches and all painted green. Small wooden sprays of leaves, newly painted and polished, were scattered about the floor. And several notices hung from the walls saying:
"MIND THE PAINT!"
or
"DON'T TOUCH!"
or
"KEEP OFF THE GRASS!"
But this was not all.
In one corner stood a flock of wooden sheep with the dye still wet on their fleeces. Crowded in another were small stiff groups of flowers — yellow aconites, green-and-white snow-drops and bright blue scyllas. All of them looked very shiny and sticky as though they had been newly varnished. So did the wooden birds and butterflies that were neatly piled in a third corner. So did the flat white wooden clouds that leant against the counter.
But the enormous jar that stood on a shelf at the end of the room was not painted. It was made of green glass and filled to the brim with hundreds of small flat shapes of every kind and colour.
"You're quite right,
Jane," said Michael staring. "It is a funny room!"
"Funny!" said Mary Poppins, looking as though he had said something insulting.
"Well — peculiar."
"PECULIAR?"
Michael hesitated. He could not find the right word.
"What I meant was—"
"I think it's a lovely room, Mary Poppins—" said Jane, hastily coming to the rescue.
"Yes it is," said Michael, very relieved. "And—" he added cleverly, "I think you look very nice in that hat."
He watched her carefully. Yes, her face was a little softer — there were even faint beginnings of a conceited smile around her mouth.
"Humph!" she remarked and turned towards the end of the room.
"Nellie-Rubina!" she called. "Where are you? We've arrived!"
"Coming! Coming!"
The highest, thinnest voice they had ever heard seemed to rise up from beneath the counter. And, presently, from the same direction as the voice, a head, topped with a small flat hat, popped up. It was followed by a round, rather solid body that held in one hand a pot of red paint and in the other a plain wooden tulip.
Surely, surely, thought Jane and Michael, this was the strangest person they had ever seen.
From her face and size she seemed to be quite young but somehow she looked as though she were made, not of flesh, but of wood. Her stiff, shiny black hair seemed to have been carved on her head and then painted. Her eyes were like small black holes drilled in her face, and surely that bright pink patch on her shiny cheek was paint!
"Well, Miss Poppins!" said this curious person, her red lips glistening as she smiled. "This is nice of you, I must say!" And putting down the paint and the tulip, she came round the counter and shook hands with Mary Poppins.
Then it was that the children noticed she had no legs at all! She was quite solid from the waist downwards and moved with a rolling motion by means of a round flat disc that was where her feet should have been.
"Not at all, Nellie-Rubina," said Mary Poppins, with unusual politeness. "It is a Pleasure and a Treat!"
"We've been expecting you, of course," Nellie-Rubina went on, "because we wanted you to help with the—" She broke off, for not only had Mary Poppins flashed her a warning look, but she had caught sight of the children.
"Oh," she cried in her high friendly voice. "You've brought Jane and Michael! And the Twins, too. What a surprise!" She bowled across and shook hands jerkily with them all.
"Do you know us, then?" said Michael, staring at her amazed.
"Oh, dear me, yes!" she trilled gaily. "I've often heard my Father and Mother speak of you. Pleased to make your acquaintance." She laughed, and insisted on shaking hands all round again.
"I thought, Nellie-Rubina," said Mary Poppins, "that maybe you could spare an ounce of Conversations."
"Most certainly!" said Nellie-Rubina, smiling and rolling towards the counter. "To do anything for you, Miss Poppins, is an Honour and a Joy!"
"But can you have conversation by the ounce?" said Jane.
"Yes, indeed. By the pound, too. Or the ton, if you like." Nellie-Rubina broke off. She lifted her arms to the large jar on the shelf. They were just too short to reach it. "Tch, tch, tch! Not long enough. I must have a bit added. In the meantime, I'll get my Uncle to lift them down. Uncle Dodger! Uncle Dod-GER!"
She screamed the last words through a door behind the counter and immediately an odd-looking person appeared.
He was as round as Nellie-Rubina, but much older and with a sadder sort of face. He, too, had a little flat hat on his head and his coat was tightly buttoned across a chest as woodeny as Nellie-Rubina's. And Jane and Michael could see, as his apron swung aside for a moment, that, like his niece, he was solid from the waist downwards. In his hand he carried a wooden cuckoo half-covered with grey paint and there were splashes of the same paint on his own nose.
"You called, my dear?" he asked, in a mild, respectful voice.
Then, he saw Mary Poppins.
"Ah, here you are at last, Miss Poppins! Nellie-Rubina will be pleased. She's been expecting you to help us with—"
He caught sight of the children and broke off suddenly.
"Oh, I beg pardon. I didn't know there was Company, my dear! I'll just go and finish this bird—"
"You will not, Uncle Dodger!" said Nellie-Rubina, sharply. "I want the Conversations lifted down. Will you be so good?"
Although she had such a jolly, cheerful face, the children noticed that when she spoke to her Uncle she gave orders rather than asked favours.
Uncle Dodger sprang forward as swiftly as anybody could who had no legs.
"Certainly, my dear, certainly!" He lifted his arms jerkily and set the jar on the counter.
"In front of me, please!" ordered Nellie-Rubina haughtily.
Fussily Uncle Dodger edged the Jar along.
"There you are, my dear, begging your pardon!"
"Are those the Conversations?" asked Jane, pointing to the Jar. "They look more like sweets."
"So they are, Miss! They're Conversation Sweets," said Uncle Dodger, dusting the jar with his apron.
"Does one eat them?" inquired Michael.
Uncle Dodger, glancing cautiously at Nellie-Rubina, leaned across the counter.
"One does," he whispered behind his hand. "But I don't, being only an Uncle-by-Marriage. But she—" he nodded respectfully towards his niece, "she's the Eldest Daughter and a Direct Descendant!"
Neither Jane nor Michael knew in the least what he meant but they nodded politely.
"Now," cried Nellie-Rubina gaily as she unscrewed the lid of the Jar. "Who'll choose first?"
Jane thrust in her hand and brought out a flat star-shaped sweet rather like a peppermint.
"There's writing on it!" she exclaimed.
Nellie-Rubina shrieked with laughter. "Of course there is! It's a Conversation! Read it."
"You're My Fancy," read Jane aloud.
"How very nice!" tinkled Nellie-Rubina, pushing the jar towards Michael. He drew out a pink sweet shaped like a shell.
"I Love You. Do You Love Me?" He spelled out.
"Ha, ha! That's a good one! Yes, I do!" Nellie-Rubina laughed loudly, and gave him a quick kiss that left a sticky patch of paint on his cheek.
John's yellow Conversation read "Deedle, deedle, dumpling!" and on Barbara's was written in large letters, "Shining-bright and airy."
"And so you are!" cried Nellie-Rubina, smiling at her over the counter.
"Now you, Miss Poppins!" And as Nellie-Rubina tipped the Jar towards Mary Poppins, Jane and Michael noticed a curious, understanding look pass between them.
Off came the large woolen glove and Mary Poppins, shutting her eyes, put in her hand and scrabbled for a moment among the Conversations. Then her fingers closed on a white one shaped like a half-moon and she held it out in front of her.
"Ten o'clock to-night," said Jane, reading the inscription aloud.
Uncle Dodger rubbed his hands together.
"That's right. That's the time when we—"
"Uncle Dod-GER!" cried Nellie-Rubina in a warning voice.
The smile died away from his face and left it sadder than before.
"Begging your pardon, my dear!" He said humbly. "I'm an old man, I'm afraid, and I sometimes say the wrong thing — beg pardon." He looked very ashamed of himself but Jane and Michael could not see that he had done anything very wrong.
"Well," said Mary Poppins, slipping her Conversation carefully into her hand-bag. "If you'll excuse us, Nellie-Rubina, I think we'd better be going!"
"Oh, must you?" Nellie-Rubina rolled a little on her disc. "It has been Such a Satisfaction! Still," she glanced out of a window, "it might snow again and keep you imprisoned here. And you wouldn't like that, would you?" she trilled, turning to the children.
"I would," said Michael, stoutly. "I would love it. And then, perhaps, I'd find out what these are for." He pointed to the painted branches, the sheep and birds and flowers.
"Those? O
h, those are just decorations," said Nellie-Rubina, airily dismissing them with a jerky wave of her hand.
"But what do you do with them?"
Uncle Dodger leaned eagerly across the counter.
"Well, you see, we take them out and—"
"Uncle Dod-GER!" Nellie-Rubina's dark eyes were snapping dangerously.
"Oh — dear! There I go again. Always speaking out of my turn. I'm too old, that's what it is," said Uncle Dodger mournfully.
Nellie-Rubina gave him an angry look. Then she turned smiling to the children.
"Good-bye," she said, jerkily shaking hands. "I'll remember our Conversations. You're my Fancy, I love You, Deedle-deedle and Shining-bright!"
"You've forgotten Mary Poppins' Conversation. It's 'Ten o'clock to-night,'" Michael reminded her.
"Ah, but she won't!" said Uncle Dodger, smiling happily.
"Uncle Dod-GER!"
"Oh, begging your pardon, begging your pardon!"
"Good-bye!" said Mary Poppins. She patted her hand-bag importantly and another strange look passed between her and Nellie-Rubina.
"Good-bye, good-bye!"
When Jane and Michael thought about it afterwards, they could not remember how they had got out of that curious room. One moment they were inside it saying good-bye to Nellie-Rubina and the next they were out in the snow again, licking their Conversations and hurrying after Mary Poppins.
"Do you know, Michael," said Jane, "I believe that sweet was a message."
"Which one? Mine?"
"No. The one Mary Poppins chose."
"You mean—?"
"I think something is going to happen at ten o'clock to-night and I'm going to stay awake and see."
"Then so will I," said Michael.
"Come along, please! Keep up!" said Mary Poppins. "I haven't all day to waste…"
Jane was dreaming deeply. And in her dream somebody was calling her name in a small urgent voice. She sat up with a start to find Michael standing beside her in his pyjamas.
"You said you'd stay awake!" he whispered accusingly.
"What? Where? Why? Oh, it's you, Michael! Well, you said you would, too."
Mary Poppins Comes Back mp-2 Page 15
