Renegade Heart (Renegades Book 1)

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Renegade Heart (Renegades Book 1) Page 15

by Lissa Lynn Thomas


  She sits up straight up on the bed, tension radiating off her. She hugs herself, looking almost sad for a moment. I can see the anger simmering underneath the façade, though. “Who?” she asks after a few moments. As if she has the right to that information.

  “It doesn’t matter who, it’s not you. I’d like you to leave now.”

  She pouts at me. “So, I know her then.” She studies my face. “From back home?”

  “If I tell you who it is, will you just leave?” I ask, desperate to get her out of here before one of the guys comes looking for me.

  She purses her painted lips, considering. “Fine. Who is it?”

  “It’s Chloe.”

  She throws her head back and laughs like I’ve just told her the funniest story ever and my jaw clenches tight. I don’t know why she thinks this is funny. I don’t know what reaction I was expecting, but after the things the guys were saying the other night, I thought her head might explode with anger.

  Hands on my hips, I glower at her. “Why is that funny, Pippa?”

  She’s still laughing, hand on her ribs, as though they’re aching from her mirth. “Chloe?” She covers her mouth and lets out a long breath. “Of course it’s Chloe.” I glare at her until she continues. “She’s been in love with you forever. An easy rebound.” She shrugs as if Chloe herself is inconsequential.

  “She’s not a rebound.” I bite out through my clenched teeth. “I’ve been in love with her forever.” I watch the laughter fade from her face and she stands up from the bed.

  She comes closer, her red tipped finger wagging at me, “Don’t be an asshole.”

  I grin, enjoying the anger on her face. “Just being honest.”

  Her face flushes but her voice stays calm. “It can’t be serious, or she’d be here. She was always in the middle of all the band’s business. If you two were something important, she’d be here. But she’s not. I’m not worried.” She sounds impressed with her own logic.

  “Why she’s not here is none of your concern. I answered your question. It’s time for you to go now. Don’t make me beg.” I step away from the door, so she can get out.

  She steps closer to me, close enough that when she reaches out her hand, her red finger nails scratch lightly across my naked chest. I can’t hide the shudder that runs through my body at the touch. Pippa’s shark smile blossoms on her pretty face, homing in on my weakness. “C’mon Raif,” she cajoles, pressing closer to me so I can feel the heat of her body. “You’ve been on tour for how long now? Going without….” She lets her words trail off as her fingernails graze back up from my stomach to my ribs, her meaning clear.

  My mind blanks of all thought and my whole body aches with desire that’s been unsated for far longer than I’ve gone since I was a teenager. I swallow hard and look down at her, surprised to see she’s right in front of me now, no space between our bodies. I don’t know how that happened. While I’m trying to figure it out, she leans in closer, until her mouth is mere inches from mine.

  Fuck me.

  Chapter 22

  Chloe

  I’ve worked out a new plan for the Saloon. I’m cautiously optimistic about it. Odetta, Zora and I pow-wowed for hours in my apartment one night after closing. Zora seconded Odetta’s desire to help any way she can. In the midst of all this mess, I’d forgotten that they were my friends, too. And just because Merle left me the business, it doesn’t mean I have to do everything on my own. Having other people to plan with, especially two smart women I already trust, helped immensely.

  Starting tonight, we’re holding a weekly karaoke contest. From our research, it’s something that people of all ages seem to enjoy. And it’s not expensive for us to implement. Tonight, is Saturday night, our busiest night of the week and if this catches on, we’ll add a second night to spread the business over the course of the week. I have a good feeling about it.

  If only things had improved in other aspects of my life. I haven’t actually spoken to Raif in almost a week. We’ve texted, which, considering how much he loathes it, is devastating if I let myself obsess over it. He says he hasn’t had time to video chat. I don’t want to think he’s lying to me. I’m trying not to think too much of it. However, there is an itch under my skin, a buzzing that is taking over all my thoughts. It’s screaming at me that something isn’t right.

  My only consolation is that the tour will be over soon. When he comes back home, hopefully things will be decided one way or another. Maybe I should say if he comes back home after the tour, things will be decided. Right now, I can’t help feeling like everything is up in the air with us. I feel like he’s hiding something from me, that’s the only time he ghosts on me. When he feels like he’s done something wrong, when he’s ashamed of himself. The thought makes my blood go cold.

  I’m shaken from my troubling thoughts by a customer saying my name. I grin, handing over their bottle of Blue Moon. Looking around, I feel pride in our plan blossoming in the wake of the hollowness thinking about Raif brings. I called in a favor and the local country station has been promoting the karaoke contest all week for me. As a result, the Saloon is packed tonight. More packed than it’s been in ages. I feel hopeful for the first time since Raif left town.

  People are waiting four deep at the bar when Lacey comes in with a group of her friends, waving hello and moving towards the stage. That’s where Zora is getting the people who came for karaoke situated. I’m surprised to see Lacey, but also glad she came. I was worried she would stay away since she doesn’t work here anymore. With any luck, I’ll be able to hire her back soon.

  It seems like half the town is here tonight, the radio must’ve really helped spread the word. Or Odetta’s friends telling everyone they crossed paths with did the trick. The crowd isn’t just full of younger people, there’s seniors in here, too. Along with middle aged folks. Hank Warner is twirling Fern Allen around the dance floor like he does this every weekend. He looks to be having the time of his life. I’ve never seen him dance when he was here before. And he’s usually not here at night. This is nuts.

  At 8:00 pm sharp, Zora climbs up on the stage. She’s dressed in baby pink from head to toe, her dark curls loose around her heart-shaped face, her mocha skin glowing. Wearing jeans and a silky looking top that doesn’t want to stay on her left shoulder, converse on her feet, she’s absolutely gorgeous.

  She taps on the microphone and the bar goes quiet. “Whoa, that’s nice,” she says, laughing. “I like this. Welcome to the inaugural Saloon Karaoke Contest!” The room explodes with applause and hoots. I grin bigger, feeling like maybe I finally did something right for this place. “If you haven’t signed up yet, you have five minutes before we’re closing it down for this week, so get in while you can. Otherwise, you’ll be at the top of the list for next week.” She gestures to the clock. “We’ll begin at 8:30 sharp folks, so warm up those vocal chords and get ready!”

  She steps down and makes her way to the bar through the throng of people. She comes around the bar and bumps her hip into mine. “This is gonna work, Chloe.” She says with a huge smile on her face, and then she begins filling orders to help me clear out the crowd. I smile at her and nod, to show that I heard her. I send up a little prayer to whoever might be listening that she’s right.

  The bar is still hopping two hours into the karaoke contest. I’ve got Bobby, one of the bouncers, refilling the beer coolers behind the bar because I can’t leave. Odetta has even popped out from the kitchen to help a couple times when things were getting hairy. I haven’t been able to look at receipts obviously, but it looks like karaoke is a success. People seem to be having a blast and they’re drinking while they do it.

  I don’t see her when she comes in, I’m too busy mixing a Long Island Ice Tea for Hank. I hear the murmur that goes through the crowd at the bar, though. Pippa. Her name is whispered over and over, and I keep my attention on my task. I cannot believe she has the nerve to come here after the way she left things with us.

  I look up t
o give Hank his drink and she’s pushed her way to the front of the line at the bar. Typical Pippa. She’s dressed simply for her. A Renegades tee shirt that she can order from their website and a pair of blue jeans. Super casual for Pippa, especially on a Saturday night. I don’t want to think about what it means that she’s wearing a Renegades shirt when she was never supportive of the band before they were discovered.

  I ignore her fake, shaky smile and move to the next customer, filling orders until there’s a lull in business. I look over and she’s made herself comfortable on a stool, staring at me with barely masked annoyance. “What are you doing here?” I ask her, wanting her to go away.

  “I deserve that, I guess.” She sighs woefully. “I’m sorry about the things I said before, Chloe. I’m home again.” She shrugs as though things should be self-explanatory. “I thought we could talk, patch things up. You’re my best friend, you know?”

  I snort at her. “We were never best friends, Pippa. You tolerated me because I was Raif’s best friend. You used me to have someone to do your bidding, to make yourself feel better about how shitty a person you are. And I was dumb enough to mistake that for friendship for far too long, but that’s done now. How about the truth this time?”

  Her face flushes but she just frowns. “I’m sorry you feel that way.” I meet her eyes and she continues. “I’m here because Raif and I have worked things out. And you’re still his best friend, I’m assuming? We’re gonna have to find a way to be around each other.”

  My entire body goes cold at her words, but I force a derisive smile. “More lies, Pippa. Raif is with me now. Which you obviously know. That’s why you’re here.” I try to hide the trembling in my hands at the unwanted suspicions that are now zinging through my mind. He wouldn’t do that to me. He wouldn’t do that to anybody.

  She laughs at me. “Maybe he rebounded with you when I was gone, Chloe. I can promise you I saw him three days ago and he still wants me.” I look at her full in the face then and see no trace of deception anywhere, no tension, no anger. Just triumph.

  I fist my hands in the rag I was about to use to wipe the bar down with and force a breath out through my mouth. “I’m no rebound.” I bite out, trying not to think about the fact that I haven’t actually talked to Raif in days and this would be a really good reason as to why. “He loves me.” I say, feeling pathetic as I am forced to try and convince her of something I still don’t understand.

  She laughs again. “Both of those can be true, you know. Maybe he does, I don’t know. I don’t care. I had him for years, it won’t take me long to whip him back into shape.”

  My anger spurts hot and I bang my fists on the bar. She still thinks of him as nothing but a possession. Someone she can twist around her finger and destroy. Even if I wasn’t with him, I wouldn’t be okay with that. Not anymore. “You think it’s that easy? He’s a person, Pippa! And you never deserved him, you never knew him. You’re not going to get me thinking he betrayed me. I know him. I trust him. Get the fuck out of here now.”

  She doesn’t even sound concerned. “But you let him go off on his own. How long has it been? Six months? You think a man’s gonna go without for that long and then turn me down? If you do, you’re a bigger fool than I thought.”

  We’ve gathered a crowd of curious onlookers now, and I force my body to straighten up and hold the traitorous tears at bay. I can’t do this here. I don’t want to be the talk of the town. I don’t want to ruin the progress we’ve made with the business tonight.

  My voice wobbles when I speak, but I can’t help it. “I think you’re a whore, and you’re not welcome here. Get out of my bar. Now.”

  She laughs again. “Oh, you’re going to kick me out now? Can you really afford to do that, Chloe? Don’t you need every dime to keep the place going? Isn’t that why you didn’t go with Raif when he left town?”

  “That’s none of your business. Get out.” I’m gripping the top of the bar tight, trying to keep myself from launching over it. Right now, I’m dying to pull her hair out at the roots.

  She stays where she is, perched on the barstool, mocking me with her very presence. “I’ll leave but it won’t change anything. I stole my man back from you. Oh, he made noises about loving you, about how he wanted me to go. But I still had him inside me three days ago. He couldn’t say no when I showed up at his hotel room door and did all his favorite things.” She looks disgusted at me for a moment. “How could you think he’d want you if he could have me back?”

  My heart shatters and the bottom drops out of my stomach at hearing her say it so plainly. I know my face is showing the devastation inside me, but I can’t do anything, I can’t even speak right now. This hurts, and the truth is there in her words, what I’ve always worried about. This is worse than anything I’ve ever felt. She’s right. I’m a fool.

  Before I can figure out what to even say to her, Pippa lets out a whimper and I see Odetta behind her, with a fist full of Pippa’s red locks. Apparently, she’s heard enough. With the hair fisted at the nape of her neck, Odetta yanks Pippa off the barstool. “That’ll be enough out of you. Get the hell out and don’t come back. I don’t care how many blowjobs you gave the deputy, I’ll have you thrown in a cell if you ever come back in here.”

  Odetta drags an enraged and screaming Pippa to the door.

  “Let me go, you old bitch!”

  Odetta ignores her and motions to Frankie, the bouncer at the door. He opens the door for her and Odetta pushes Pippa outside. She shakes her hands out, as though getting rid of something vile that touched her skin.

  Frankie closes the door in Pippa’s face as she makes to come back inside. Odetta says, “You ever let her in here again and your ass is fired. You hear?” He nods vehemently, not even looking to me for validation of the statement.

  I’m still standing there like a statue, my brain as empty as my chest feels right now as Odetta comes back around the bar. I shake my head, feeling dazed; empty. Stupid. I’m so stupid. Odetta nudges me back a little. “Honey, go splash some water on your face and get back out here, okay? Don’t you let her in your head. You wait until you can talk to Raif.”

  I nod, still voiceless, and escape into the office to do as she said.

  After all, what else can I do? It’s not like I can call Raif right now and demand answers. He’s on stage performing right now, in some city I’ll never see across the country. I have to be strong, get through the night. Later, when I’m not feeling so raw, hopefully, I’ll call him and tell him he has to have the time to talk to me tonight or we’re done.

  I tamp down the urge to just lock the door and sob. I have to go out and pretend I wasn’t affected by that whole scene now. I don’t know that I’m that great an actress. But I have to try.

  Chapter 23

  Raif

  The show in Portland was amazing. The crowd was into it, our merchandise is selling and there’s actually enough time tomorrow to do some sightseeing before we hit the road. All in all, it was a good day. I should be flying, all four of us should be. But I’m clutching my cell phone to my ear, Chloe’s voice wobbling on my voicemail. “Raif, you need to call me as soon as you get this.”

  I see Luke’s head tilt to the side, his jaw rigid. Clearly, he heard the message. Super. He’s not speaking to me at the moment. None of them are actually. The tables turned quickly when Luke, of all people, saw Pippa leaving my hotel room. I was half naked, and so even though I had her by the elbow, literally dragging her from my room, he jumped to conclusions. He told Bran and Troy what he saw when they heard us yelling at each other in the hallway.

  Other guests at the hotel had come out to see what was going on. I’m sure our record label will be thrilled if they find out about us causing a public scene. Things are frosty now. The only time we act like we want to be near each other is when we’re on stage. We have four shows left on this tour and we can do what we want for a month. We have to be back in Nashville for the promotion of our debut album the month after that. The
break can’t come fast enough at this point. Right now, it feels like getting signed was the worst thing that ever happened to me.

  “Is she okay?” Luke asks, his voice attempting civility.

  I turn my head to look at him full on, surprised he’s speaking to me. I know it’s only because he’s worried for Chloe, but I’ll take it. I’m in a mess and I know it. “I don’t know, doesn’t sound it.”

  “You gonna call her back? Or you gonna keep on being a pussy?” He asks me, his voice biting.

  “I’ll call her back as soon as we get back to the hotel.” I snap back at him. “I’d rather at least have the illusion of privacy.”

  He sighs. “Sorry, just you’re fucking this all up, Raif. I can’t sugarcoat it.”

  “You think I don’t fucking know that?” I bark at him. “I have to tell her everything, and even though nothing happened, she’s gonna think the worst just like you assholes all did. I’d wait and just tell her when I see her, but she’ll see right through it. Video chat with her, she’s gonna take one look at my face and see that something’s gone on. Same with the telephone, she’ll hear it in my voice.”

  “You think she doesn’t know something’s up right now?” Luke asks angrily. “If you believe that, you’re an idiot.”

  “I don’t know what to do, Luke! I don’t want this to hurt her and I know it’s going to. No matter what I do, I’m here and she’s there and shit’s just unraveling.”

  Luke opens and closes his mouth without speaking.

  Bran speaks up startling me. I’d forgotten he and Troy were even in the car. “And where’s Pippa?”

  I think about Chloe’s voice on the message. Then I recall Pippa’s rage when we had her evicted from the hotel after she showed up at my door. “Fuck me,” I groan.

 

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