by Tara Sivec
Over the years Garrett tried his hardest to make up for Milo's upbringing. He quickly forgave Milo's abrupt bursts of anger when something didn’t go his way and he punched a hole in the wall or threw a glass across the room. He jumped into the middle of altercations that had nothing to do with him when Milo picked a fight with random strangers. He also tried to be understanding when Milo would retreat into himself for hours at a time and stare at the old cigarette burn scars on the inside of his arms, lashing out at anyone who interrupted his dark thoughts. Garrett even looked the other way when Milo borrowed his car without asking, and he took the blame when Milo brought it home with a dented fender and a busted headlight.
He let Milo get the bigger allowance for doing fewer chores, and he gave up dates if the girl didn't have a friend that could double with Milo. He put his dream of going to MIT to rest and instead, applied to the Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland with Milo. Milo was in dire need of regulation and control, and Garrett knew this was the best decision for him and his future. Being his best friend, it was an easy choice for Garrett to go with him and make sure he was okay. And of course there was the added bonus of meeting Parker while they were in school. Having her in his life made it much easier to give up on his dreams and stay the course with his two best friends.
After four years of hard work and strict discipline at the Naval Academy, and with Parker’s friendship and support, both men graduated as Ensign O-1, officers in the Navy, and received orders to be stationed in California. Garrett knew all along he wanted to continue his studies after graduation by earning his Master of Science degree in Computer Science, and since he'd be in California, he decided to juggle continuing his education at the Naval Postgraduate School with the rigorous training schedule the SEAL team required. Milo wanted nothing more to do with school and instead focused on his training and his blossoming relationship with Parker. Both men were accepted into the Navy SEALS, each for different reasons.
After Parker had graduated from the University of Maryland, she instantly started receiving freelance photography assignments. She was very secretive about the location of the assignments and what they entailed, but she assured Garrett and Milo it was normal considering she was new to the field. They never questioned her aloofness about her job, especially when the prints from her travels began showing up in magazines.
After the boys packed up and moved to California, she went to visit them twice within the first month. Each time she showed up, she fell more in love with the state. She had never lived anywhere but her small hometown in Michigan and then Maryland for college. Being in a place within walking distance of the ocean, surrounded by palm trees and sunshine, made her dread flying home and preparing for the upcoming months of ice, snow, and rain. It occurred to her on her flight back to Maryland that her job, though it conflicted with her personal life and forced her to keep things from those closest to her, gave her the opportunity to make her home almost anywhere she wanted since she traveled so much.
Two weeks later, she moved into the boys' rental home in California and stopped worrying if a long-distance relationship with Milo would ever work.
Garrett often thought about the day he and Milo sat down at Parker’s table in the coffee shop. For the first time ever, Garrett forgot how to speak around a girl, and not just because she was absolutely stunning with her long dark hair, green eyes, and porcelain skin. She was reserved and quiet when they first sat down, content to let Milo do all of the talking and never once making him feel like she was bored. It bothered Garrett that she avoided all of the personal questions Milo threw at her, and he didn’t like the sadness he saw in her eyes each time Milo mentioned Garrett’s parents. But the easy way she laughed at Milo’s jokes and played along with his flirtations gave Garrett a good feeling, even if he wasn’t the one she was directing her attention towards. When she slowly began opening up to them, one little piece at a time, Garrett could practically feel the weight of the world on her shoulders, and he wished more than anything that he could lift it for her. The one and only time during that entire first conversation she truly seemed happy and excited about something was when she spoke of her photography. Garrett would never forget the spark in her eyes that day and the smile that lit up her entire face when she spoke about her camera. He didn't begrudge Milo for taking advantage of Garrett’s new found skills as a mute and flirting with her throughout that conversation.
Milo had just found out a few mornings earlier that his father died in a drunk driving accident. There was no love lost between the two, and it had been almost three years since they had last spoken, but it put Milo in a funk for days.
Talking to Parker that day was the first time Garrett had seen Milo smile in almost a week. When Milo asked her out on a date for that evening, there was no way he could say anything to him about how he couldn’t get the girl out of his mind or how he was the one who saw her first.
After all, Milo was his best friend. And Parker...she was just a girl. Garrett figured she would come and go just as fast as all the others. Milo had baggage. Most women didn't have the time or the energy to deal with it.
Garrett should have known immediately that Parker would be different. She didn't put up with Milo's nonsense, and she wasn't afraid to call him on his bullshit. She also knew how to soothe him when life got to be too much or when memories of the past threatened to consume him. Her gentle way of using the tips of her fingers to smooth the worry lines between his eyes and her soft voice telling him to take a deep breath instantly calmed Milo and returned him back to the present.
Unlike other women who might balk at the idea of their boyfriend being in the military and leaving them alone for weeks, sometimes months at a time, Parker encouraged Milo. She knew he needed structure and discipline of the healthy variety. Aside from her relationship with him and his friendship with Garrett, the military was a big help in keeping his demons at bay. How could Garrett ever deny his friend a woman like that in his life?
So he buried his feelings, his wants, and desires and stepped aside so his friend could finally find some peace and happiness. There were plenty of fish in the sea, as the saying goes, and Garrett spent all his time making sure he explored as many willing and able fish as he could.
As Parker got to know Milo, she was eager to do everything she could to make him happy. She was a nurturer and she wanted to take care of him. Neither one of them had the best home life growing up. It was only natural that they fit so well together and bonded so quickly. It probably wasn’t the best basis for a relationship, but in the beginning it worked for them. Milo understood how the holidays made Parker feel despondent because it was a time for families and hers was non-existent. Milo didn’t complain that she needed to travel so much for her job or that she couldn’t tell him the specifics about an assignment because it was the same way for him. They understood each other, and somehow they made it work. At a time in their lives when neither one of them thought they needed someone, they had found each other. Their friendship was so deep and true that one could immediately tell when the other was having a bad day of memories just by taking one look at their face. Their relationship was based on friendship, first and foremost. Milo would do anything to ensure Parker’s happiness and the feelings were mutual. Parker never wanted to trust anyone again, but it was a hard rule to follow where Milo was concerned. What started out as friendship easily grew stronger and they naturally slipped into a relationship without any fanfare or intense discussions.
Aside from Garrett, she never had anyone in her life that she connected with so quickly or that she trusted so easily. Being Milo’s friend was never the problem because it was always a two-way street between them. Milo was there for her just as much as she was for him. The problem was always her lingering thoughts about someone else, someone she had no business pining for or dreaming about.
Sometimes it made Parker feel guilty that she had to grow to love Milo as something more than a friend, and the fireworks never exploded when t
hey first started sleeping together. But that stuff was only for fairytales and movies anyway. What she had with Milo was based on friendship and was real, even if they did have to work at it.
Parker ignored the nagging feelings of jealousy and longing and buried everything she felt for the other man in her life way down deep and vowed to be the best girlfriend in the world to Milo. She would do anything to avoid hurting him, and that included putting her wants and needs on the back burner. No woman needed to feel butterflies in her stomach every time a man walked into a room or daydream about soft lips or strong hands on her bare skin, but it didn't mean she didn't want those things. A relationship certainly didn’t need excitement or intensity to work, although those were the things she often longed for, and that Garrett always made her feel without even trying. Parker had a nice, easy relationship with Milo that held no complications or expectations. It was exactly what she needed in her life.
Over the years Parker became Garrett's closest friend, next to Milo, and he convinced himself that any feelings he may have had for her at one time were just the product of a silly crush. Given the amount of time he spent with her, it was only natural that every time he was with another woman, he imagined Parker's face when he pushed into them and heard Parker's soft moans and shouts of pleasure when they came.
Garrett watched his two best friends fall in love, grow together, and get engaged. Jealousy had nothing to do with the fact that whenever he had a dry spell and took matters into his own hands, he pictured Parker's mouth sucking him off when he palmed his dick and thought about how tight and hot she would feel wrapped around him when he came in his hand.
He never failed to feel like a pervert for having those thoughts about one of his best friends afterward. It was a vicious cycle that had been going on for eight years with no end in sight.
Unfortunately, nothing explained the anger he felt when he watched Milo kiss her or the sharp stab of pain in his chest when Milo opened the small, velvet box that day in the bar and showed him the diamond ring.
But Garrett had become an expert at compartmentalizing his feelings over the years. If he didn't admit it out loud, it wasn't true. He wasn't in love with one of his best friends because he would never say that out loud.
So he went on with his life and slept with random women to chase away his feelings and everyone had a good laugh about what a player he was.
He pretended that he imagined the looks of jealousy in Parker's eyes when he brought yet another new girl into their circle, and he most certainly knew he imagined the way she sometimes stared at his lips when he talked or sighed his name when she slept on the couch in his room while she and Milo were fighting.
Garrett was fully prepared to be Milo's best man and to give Parker away at their wedding since she hadn't spoke to her dad in twelve years. He lied through his teeth when he told them he would be honored to have such an important task.
He resigned himself to the fact that this was his life, now and forever...until his best friend was killed in action.
The shock slowly wore off and Garrett and Parker started to learn how to live their lives without Milo. Garrett hated the fact that every time he looked at her, he wondered “What if?” Milo didn’t deserve that kind of betrayal from him. It was too late to go back in time and make her his.
But she was never his to begin with, was she? You couldn't take back something that was never yours.
When Garrett found out things about Milo and the Dominican mission weren’t adding up, and that there were rumors his death wasn't an accident, he knew he had no other choice. As much as he didn't want to leave Parker so soon after Milo's death, he had to do this. For both of them. They needed closure.
His best friend had been gone for a month and Garrett still struggled every day to believe it was true. The past four weeks he’d spent every waking moment waiting for his phone to ring and to hear Milo’s boisterous laugh on the other end telling him it was all one big misunderstanding. But that call never came, and Garrett realized he couldn’t sit around waiting for it to happen. He reported back to work a few days earlier than planned because Parker threatened to beat the crap out of him if he didn’t. Under normal circumstances he would have laughed at her for thinking she could even attempt something like that, but her face was entirely too serious when she said it, and Garrett was a little worried she might actually attempt it and hurt herself.
Since Garrett never took a day off, he had accrued enough time to be able to take at least six weeks off. After two weeks he was climbing the walls. But he refused to leave Parker’s side, and even with her continued reassurance that she would be fine, he stuck by her like glue for another two weeks before she finally put her foot down.
“Garrett, you need to go back to work,” Parker told him one night over dinner.
It had been twenty-two days, two hours, and forty-seven minutes since the knock on her door informed Parker that Milo was never coming home. It had been twenty-one days since Garrett had slept in his own house, preferring to sleep on Parker’s couch instead. And it had been fourteen days since Parker hadn’t been irritated with him at one point or another for hovering over her like she was on the verge of suicide or a nervous breakdown.
At first his concern was sweet, and she was grateful to him for helping her pick up the pieces and figure out how to live without Milo, but now he was just getting on her nerves. He refused to take his own advice of moving on and living again. She could see it in his eyes. He’d lost someone too, but he acted like she was the only one hurting. She was tired of him keeping everything bottled up inside. She knew he was avoiding the grief and the sadness just to make sure she was okay. She would never be okay again. She’d lost her best friend and a huge piece of her heart when Milo died. She was slowly coming to terms with that and trying to live one day at a time, just like everyone told her to do. It was time for Garrett to do that as well. He couldn’t stay home from work and sleep on her couch forever. She needed to figure out how to do this on her own, and she couldn’t do that with Garrett keeping track of her every breath.
“Seriously, it’s time for you to go back,” Parker repeated as Garrett sat across the table from her not saying anything.
He gently set his fork down next to his plate and looked at her face, studying it to see if she was serious.
“I still have another two weeks before I need to go back, don’t worry.”
Parker sighed in exasperation.
“I’m not worried about your time off. I’m worried about you. You’re going insane sitting around here day in and day out.”
Garrett shook his head and tried to laugh it off, but Parker knew him too well.
“You need to move on too, Garrett,” she told him softly. “I’m not the only one who lost someone. I know your work is therapy to you. It clears your head and you love doing it. I’m not going to let you put your life on hold any more for me. I’m going to be okay. It’s time for you to go.”
As much as it pained Garrett to leave Parker, he knew she was right. Neither one of them could move on if they were sitting around her house lost in memories.
Two days later, Garrett went back to work.
An hour into his day and he was still busy going through the emails he missed while he’d been out when a Navy messenger came up to his desk and set down a bin full of mail.
Garrett looked up from what he’d been doing with a confused look on his face.
“That can’t all be mine. I’ve only been out for a few weeks.”
Garrett stood up and pulled the bin toward him and glanced inside.
“Actually, sir, some of it is yours and the rest is Lieutenant JG Roberts’. The receptionist thought you’d know what to do with his things.”
Garrett thanked the man and started leafing through the envelopes. Most of it was interoffice Navy mail: forms, letters, and other paperwork that went back and forth between Navy offices on a daily basis. Garrett piled those things off to the side so he could look at them
later and see who they should be sent to or which ones he could file himself.
He flipped quickly through the mail, nothing urgent catching his eye until a white envelope stuck out like a sore thumb in the middle of all the manila-colored interoffice ones. Garrett pulled that out of the stack and was confused when he saw it was a cell phone bill for Milo from T-Mobile. Garrett knew for a fact that Milo had Verizon, just like he and Parker did because they all shared the same Family Share plan.
After a quick phone call to Parker to confirm that Milo did indeed still have the same phone and plan before he left, Garrett tore into the envelope. He didn’t recognize the cell phone number listed at the top of the bill and briefly wondered if maybe the Navy had given Milo a phone for work-related purposes. That didn’t make any sense, though, since Garrett, Milo’s superior, would have had first-hand knowledge of this information and would have been required to sign off on the expense.
Garrett scanned through the bill, noting that every phone call Milo made or received was to the same phone number with an 809 area code. After a quick Google search, Garrett found out that area code belonged to the Dominican Republic. According to this bill, Milo had been receiving or making at least twenty phone calls every single day the month before he left on his mission.
Garrett double-checked the date on the bill, wondering why it was just now being delivered since it was dated four months ago.
He picked up the phone at his desk and called customer service. After fifteen minutes on hold, and being passed around to countless people, he finally found someone who could help him.
