by Lyn Denison
Annabel nodded, biting her lip.
Petra clutched Fliss’s arm. “I can’t lose Liam,” she whispered brokenly. “I love him so much. And we couldn’t lose Dad as well as Mum, could we, Fliss?”
Fliss held her close and watched as tears trickled down Annabel’s face. She felt so helpless. What could she say to the older woman? Liam was Annabel’s only child, nineteen years old, with his whole life before him.
Chrissie came in bringing Marcus with her. “Any news?” he asked worriedly, and they shook their heads. “What about their signal beacon?”
“No,” Fliss told him. “Apart from the initial short signal, there’s been nothing.”
Chrissie and Marcus sat down quietly and they waited.
An eternity later the door opened and Bailey stepped into the room, her eyes finding Fliss. Without a word Fliss crossed the floor and dissolved into the comfort of Bailey’s arms.
“Mayla rang me from the mainland,” Bailey explained. “She saw it on TV. She’ll be here as soon as she can.”
Bailey held Fliss close, hand rubbing her back, murmuring quietly and Fliss allowed the tears she’d been holding back to fall. She sobbed into Bailey’s shoulder, taking comfort from her warmth, from the familiar scent of her light perfume. Eventually Fliss pulled herself together and they rejoined the others. Still clutching Fliss’s hand Bailey hugged Petra and introduced herself to Annabel who filled her in on the latest developments.
Time continued to pass in a torture of worry and uncertainty. Then word came that one of the search boats had suddenly picked up a beacon signal from the trawler. The helicopter changed its search pattern and more debris was spotted on the rough seas. They all sat silently and waited again.
It was just dusk when the radio operator called down to them. “They’ve found ’em.” He gave them a broad grin and the thumbs-up. A cheer went up in the station. Fliss, Petra and Annabel hugged each other in relief tinged with some residual concern that would remain until their father and Liam were safely on land.
They found Fliss’s father and Liam clinging to a floating refrigerator lid, Fliss learned later, and getting the men out of the rough seas and into the helicopter was extremely difficult. At one stage they thought they would have to wait until a search boat reached them. But eventually, the helicopter, low on fuel, landed on the helipad.
Liam, wrapped in a blanket, was the first to step gingerly onto the tarmac. His tired young face broke into a wide grin as his mother and Petra clutched him to them. Then their father was lifted off on a stretcher and they carried him over to the building and out of the chilling wind. Jim Devon lifted his hand weakly and Fliss took hold of it, gently squeezing it.
“Dad,” she said brokenly. “Thank God you’re safe. Are you okay?”
“Broken leg,” he said raspily. “But I’m okay now. Thanks to these guys,” he added, indicating the helicopter crew as they shrugged out of their orange suits.
Annabel let go of her son and crossed to their father. She leaned over the stretcher and hugged him, crying all over him. “I love you so much, Jim.” Fliss heard her say.
Her father awkwardly stroked Annabel’s hair. “I love you, too. And Annie, young Liam,” her father swallowed, “he did good. More than good. He saved my life out there.”
Tears ran down Fliss’s face and she felt Bailey’s arm slide around her waist. She leaned against her as Bailey held her sympathetically.
An ambulance officer gently moved them aside as he checked
Liam and their father over. The local doctor who had been delivering a baby at the other end of the island arrived at last, and they began to arrange to transfer both men to the mainland. It was decided Annabel and Petra would accompany them and Fliss would join them the next day with changes of clothes and anything else they might both need.
“If that’s okay with you, Dad?” Fliss asked, taking her father’s hand again.
“Sure. But I want to talk to you, Fliss. Before this stuff they gave me takes hold of me.”
“You should just relax, Dad. We can talk tomorrow,” Fliss began, but he shook his head, tried to sit up. Fliss gently settled him back.
He looked at Annabel. “I need to talk to Fliss. Alone. If you all don’t mind.”
Bailey put a chair behind Fliss and indicated she should sit down before she moved over to the others. Fliss’s father watched her go, his expression uncertain.
“Dad, can’t this wait?”
“No, love. Not any longer.” He clutched her hand. “I had a lot of time to think out there. Well, whenever that gasbag Liam stopped for breath. I think he thought he had to talk to keep us going. It did too. But even he ran out of things to say now and then.” He gave a wry smile. “He’s a good boy, young Liam. I couldn’t ask for better for Petra. But that’s not what I wanted to say.
“Out there, thinking about you all, I realized I hadn’t told you how proud of you all I am. But especially you, love. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when we lost your mother. I was so wrapped up in my own grief I forgot about you three. I’ve been wanting to apologize for a long time.”
“Dad, that’s okay. I understand.” Fliss bit back a sob. “Mum was your soul mate.”
“Yes. She was. But about you, Fliss.” He stopped and shook his head. “I’m sorry I let your mother talk me into, well, I know I should have spoken up about it.”
Fliss frowned, not understanding what her father was talking about. Maybe the injection they’d given him was making his mind muddled.
“I wouldn’t have missed a moment of my life with your mother. And that’s partly why I want to say this to you. You have one life, love. It’s up to you how you live it. But you have to live it the way you want to, not the way you think other people expect you to live it. Be who you are.”
“I don’t know what you mean,” Fliss said softly, clutching the familiar wall of protection around her.
“Your mother and I watched you change, Fliss, and, God help me, we let it happen. You went from being bright and bubbly and full of life to a serious introvert.”
“Oh, Dad, I’ve just, well, grown up.”
Her father shook his head. “All the life went out of you when that young woman left the island.”
Fliss couldn’t think of a thing to say.
“Your mother told me she thought you were spending too much time with her, that she thought you had a schoolgirl crush on her. I said to leave it be, you were just a kid. But your mother said she could see you getting hurt and we should discourage you from seeing her so often.”
“I knew Mum felt that,” Fliss said uncomfortably.
“She was worried about you, about the, well, she thought you had an unconventional relationship with her.”
Fliss stared at her father. “You and Mum knew. About Bailey and me?”
“Your mother did. She was sick with worry over it. I told her she was imagining it. The truth of it was I wasn’t keen on my daughter being that way so I refused to even contemplate it. I wouldn’t even discuss it with your mother so she had to worry about it on her own. I’m not too proud of that, Fliss.
“I had a lot of time to think out there, about my life.” He stopped, swallowed. “I haven’t exactly shone in a lot of aspects of it, let me tell you. So I want to start putting things right with you. I want to tell you if that’s what you are, then so be it. What’s more important is that you’re my daughter and I love you. Since that time you’ve never, well, brought anyone home so I guess it was easier for me to keep on thinking your mother was mistaken.” He looked at Fliss, waiting for her to comment.
“I am a lesbian, Dad. I should have told you a long time ago.”
He was silent for long moments and then he nodded.
“Dad, I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you or Mum.”
“I know that.” He patted her hand. “And you don’t need to apologize to me or to anyone else. We need to apologize to you. It’s been playing on my mind over the years, moreso since Petra sai
d Bailey Macrae had come back. You see, when you wanted to go down south with her your mother took her aside, told her you were too young to make such a life-changing decision, and that if she cared about you it would be better for you if she left you alone.”
“Mum spoke to Bailey about it?”
“Yes. At the time, with no support from me, she thought she was doing what was best for you. By the time we saw what it had done to you it was too late. Bailey Macrae had left the island and you, well, the heart had gone out of you.”
Fliss swallowed, tried to speak, but her voice deserted her.
“Your mother and I only ever wanted you to be happy.”
“I know that Dad.”
He held her gaze. “I’ve known for a long time that you haven’t been. But I just didn’t know how to put it right.”
“It’s okay, Dad. I’m fine,” Fliss reassured him. “I love working in the gallery.”
“But I want you to be happy, like your mother and I were. I want you to have someone you love and who loves you. Like your mother and I,” he repeated.
“I know, Dad.” Fliss patted his shoulder. “Now, don’t you think you should get some rest?”
“There’s plenty of time for that. I want to know you’re all right, love?”
Fliss paused and nodded. “I think I can be, Dad,” she said softly, feeling a dark cloud lift from her shoulders.
“Good,” her father said thickly. “And Bailey Macrae. Is it still her?”
Fliss nodded again. “Yes. It always has been.”
“But she’s married, isn’t she?”
“She and her husband are getting a divorce.”
“Because of you?”
“Partly I suppose,” she said carefully. “But it’s a mutual decision they made before Bailey came back to the island.”
“But she lives such a public life. I don’t want you hurt again, love.” He clutched at Fliss’s hand again. “When I get out of hospital I want to talk to her.”
“Oh, Dad. Please don’t.”
“It’s time I started acting like a father. I like Bailey. I always did. If she thought as much of you as you thought of her then I suspect it took a lot for her to walk away years ago.”
Fliss sighed, fingers worrying the edge of her father’s blanket.
“I know it’s no consolation but I want you to know your mother regretted interfering, talking to Bailey.” Her father moved and flinched. “Just remember I love you. People will accept who you are or they won’t. If they don’t then that’s their problem.”
Fliss leaned over and kissed her father’s cheek. “The ambulance wants to load you up now so I’ll see you tomorrow. And Dad, thanks. I love you, too.”
As the ambulance drew away Fliss stood numbly watching it go, her emotions stretched almost to breaking point.
“Fliss?”
She turned to look at Bailey, the curve of her cheek, the small upturned nose, her deep, inky blue eyes, the fullness of her lips, the thin line defining their perfect shape.
“Come inside,” Bailey said gently. “It’s pretty cold out here and the guys were brewing some hot tea. I’ll go and get us some. Okay? Then I’ll drive you home.” She lightly touched Fliss’s arm and Fliss nodded, following Bailey inside to rejoin the others.
“What a relief they’re safe,” Chrissie said beside Fliss, giving her a quick hug. She looked at her with concern. “You look really exhausted. Will Bailey drive you home?”
Fliss nodded.
“Okay. I’ll drop Marcus off then.”
Marcus enveloped Fliss in a hug. “Glad it turned out so well, Fliss. And don’t worry about the gallery tomorrow. I’ll handle it for you.”
“Thanks, Marcus. I’d appreciate that,” Fliss said tiredly.
“Could you go get the car for me, Marcus?” Chrissie asked him and handed him the keys. “You know where I’m parked.” When Marcus left them she turned back to Fliss, enveloped her in another hug. “I’m glad, too. About Liam and your dad. Will you come over for dinner with us before Paul goes into hospital?”
“Sure,” Fliss agreed. “You know I love your cooking.”
“And none of Paul’s cousins will be there.” She winked at Fliss. “Male or female.”
Fliss laughed with her. “I’d really appreciate that, too.”
“So you’d better bring Bailey.”
Fliss looked at her and Chrissie shook her head. “I’ve been totally blind, haven’t I?” she said gently. “When she came in tonight I saw the way you looked at each other. I just didn’t see it until then. What sort of friend am I?”
“The best of best friends,” Fliss said and kissed Chrissie on the cheek.
“What will you do? You and Bailey, I mean?”
“I don’t know,” Fliss replied. “I just don’t know.”
Chrissie sighed and looked out the door to see Marcus waiting for her. “There’s Marcus. I’d better go. I’ll see you tomorrow. We’ll make a day for dinner and we can talk when you’re ready.”
Fliss walked out onto the veranda with her friend, watched her get in the car with Marcus and she waved them off.
Another car pulled into the car park and Mayla jumped out of the passenger seat and raced up to Fliss, pulling her into her arms. “I just got back. I was babysitting the triplets when I heard it on the news. As soon as Megan came home I caught the next water taxi. How are they?”
“Fine. Dad’s leg is broken and they’re keeping Liam in hospital overnight for observation. They’ve just taken them over to the mainland. I’m just so thankful they found them.” Fliss shook her head. “The alternative doesn’t bear thinking about.”
“What happened?”
“Dad seems to think the net snagged on something. The boat turned over and sank. Dad got thrown against something and then he was in the water. Liam grabbed him when he was going under for the third time, Dad says. A refrigerator lid floated by and they clung to that. They don’t know why but the signal beacon stopped working, then it started transmitting again and they found them.”
“Hell!” Mayla hugged her tightly.
“They’re on their way to hospital. Petra and Annabel are with them.”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here earlier to sit it out with you,” Mayla began.
“That’s okay, Chrissie and Marcus and Bailey were here. And the guys at the station here were fantastic.”
“Thank heavens they found them when they did. The sea was so rough coming over in the water taxi and that’s in the relative shelter of the island. I can imagine how much worse it was out there. It’s a miracle they’re okay. Did you get. to talk to them before they went off to the hospital?”
“Yes. And Dad and I—” Fliss glanced back into the station. Bailey seemed to be waiting for their tea. “Mayla. Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.” She’d followed Fliss’s gaze, saw Bailey but made no comment.
“Did you know my mother knew about Bailey and me?”
Mayla paused, and a wary expression flickered in her eyes. Then she frowned. “What’s brought this on, Fliss?”
“You were my mother’s best friend.” Fliss held Mayla’s gaze. “Did Mum discuss my relationship with Bailey with you?”
“Fliss, you’re tired. Why don’t we talk about this later?”
“No. It has to be now. Just tell me what you know.”
Mayla sighed. “Your father told you?”
“Yes. Just before they took him to the hospital. He told me they knew—about Bailey and me. He said he was sorry.” Fliss swallowed. “That they’d interfered.”
“Your mother was sorry too.” Mayla looked around. “Why don’t we sit down over here out of this wind.” She pulled out a couple of chairs near a small table. When they were seated Mayla leaned towards Fliss. “Your mother never mentioned anything about it to me until I was visiting her in hospital a few weeks before she died. She told me she’d talked to Bailey. About her relationship with you.”
“I can’
t believe Mum would have done that,” Fliss said. “What did she say?”
Mayla shrugged. “I don’t know the specifics but your mother said she was upset you were so unhappy when Bailey left. I guess she thought that in time, you’d just get over it but she could see you didn’t—and hadn’t—and she blamed herself for that. She said she felt so guilty because she never imagined you would be so upset.”
“And you don’t know what she actually said to Bailey?” Fliss asked.
“She didn’t tell me in so many words, but, reading between the lines, I think she pointed out to Bailey that she was so much older than you. She still thought, even when we talked about it, that you were too young at the time to know what you wanted. She was worried for you, Fliss.”
“I didn’t even suspect she knew about Bailey and me. How could she have known? I was so careful.”
“Mothers know these things, believe me,” Mayla laughed softly. Fliss looked down at the tabletop. “You should have told me this before? How could you keep it to yourself?”
“She was my friend, Fliss. She told me not to tell you. What could I do? I made a promise. What could I do?”
Fliss sighed. “Nothing, I guess.”
“Look, Fliss, you don’t know if it had any bearing on Bailey’s decision to leave. Perhaps you should ask Bailey herself about it?”
“She hasn’t mentioned it either, then or now.”
“Right. And I can understand that too, Fliss. Can’t you? How could she tell you your mother had warned her away when she knew how much you cared about your mother? She was in a no-win situation.”
“She should have told me,” Fliss repeated stubbornly. “It was my life too.”
“Don’t be so hard on her, love. Her life was in something of a turmoil as well, remember. She had a lot of decisions she had to make.”
Fliss remembered Bailey’s tears that first morning on the headland. Hadn’t Bailey said as much that day?
“There was the job offer,” Mayla continued. “She’d been working so hard for years for that.”
